by Olivia Snow
Oh my. His smile broke my stare as he showed off perfect white teeth and I blushed, embarrassed. Shit. His lips moved and I was once again placed in a trance. He was saying something, but I couldn’t hear anything. I was mesmerized.
“You speak English, sweetheart?” He cocked his head to the side.
“Huh?”
He chuckled and the sound vibrated my chest and sizzled down to my lower stomach. I took off the hardhat, shaking the flatness from my hair. He froze, his amused grin gone, his mouth dropping ever so slightly before he recovered and cleared his throat.
“Are you lost?” he asked.
“Yeah, actually, I am. I’m trying to find the ladies’ room.” As I spoke, his stare slowly traveled from my feet, lingering on my legs exposed by my modest shorts. The way he was staring made me feel like they were the shortest shorts ever…and see-through.
“You gotta put that hardhat back on, darlin’. We wouldn’t want you to hurt that pretty little head of yours, would we?” He lifted his gaze from my legs to my eyes, then he stepped forward so we were only inches apart. Sweat and the spicy musky smell of his deodorant invaded my nostrils and I instinctively stepped closer, wanting to smell more. For the love of God.
He took the hat from my hand and placed it back on my head, tapping the top of it. “There, safe and sound.”
I smiled shyly, looking up at him as the hard plastic shifted back. Now that I was so close to him I could see the color of his eyes. They were a striking deep green, reminding me of the pines back in Vail, making me a little homesick.
“Vanessa?” I heard Stellen’s voice from across the building.
Hot construction worker and I were out of sight behind a concrete wall. I didn’t want to answer Stellen because I knew as soon as he found me whatever was happening between Southern Sexiness and I would disappear. What the hell, Vanessa? What am I thinking?
He cocked an eyebrow, stepping back, and I missed his smell instantly.
“Vanessa?” Now it was my father’s voice, and I knew I had to answer. I sighed heavily, making the handsome man before me chuckle.
“I’m here,” I yelled back after clearing my throat. Soon enough, Stellen, my father, and Finn rounded the wall and came to a stop.
“What’s this?” Stellen asked, glaring at Southern Sexiness.
“Diesel?” My dad’s voice was stern.
Diesel. Hmm, fits him. Before he could answer, I spoke first. “I got lost, Daddy, and Diesel here helped me. He even insisted that I wear my hat.”
“Is that right?” Stellen walked over to my side, placing his hand back on my hip, a little lower than before. I felt his fingertips on the side of my behind. My stare snapped to his, but he was still glaring at Diesel.
“Oh, well, in that case,” my father began, “I appreciate the gesture, Diesel. By the way, this is my daughter, Vanessa. And her boyfriend, Stellen. Guys, this is Diesel, my foreman.” Instead of shaking hands, they only nodded at each other. Diesel seemed unfazed by the two masters of the universe in front of him. He only focused his attention on me.
“Did you still need to use the restroom?” he asked.
I felt the tops of my cheeks spread with heat. “Ah, no, I’m okay. Thank you, though.”
“All right then, you keep that hard hat on, darlin’, it ain’t safe ‘round here.” He breamed at me before turning his attention on the three men. “Gentlemen.” He nodded, excusing himself as he headed toward the front of the building.
“He’s the best in the business. I had to bring his crew in from Oklahoma,” Daddy explained as soon as Diesel was out of hearing range.
After that, Daddy, Stellen and I ate an early lunch.
The entire time, I struggled with the image of Diesel’s strong sweaty tattooed arms and his spicy manly scent. Guilt overwhelmed me, keeping me from focusing on the discussion that was taking place in front of me.
***
The evening sun still shone brightly as I walked home from my last class, I stopped to pick up dinner for Ava and me. The conversation we were going to have was long overdue and it wasn’t going to be easy, so having food in our stomachs would certainly help.
I also picked up several tissue boxes and a container of chamomile tea to help with our nerves. In our cold, sterile apartment I placed the steaming fresh Chinese food on the kitchen island, fondly recalling it was the only type of food we agreed on when we were younger.
My mother had raised us on eating nothing but ‘organic’ healthy foods. I remember when my father asked her to cook up some good old fashioned Oklahoma style soul food, and she glared at him as if he had lost his mind. She was ashamed of her roots and made it very obvious we were all bound by the same unspoken law that it was never to be brought up.
The only reason I knew where my mother was from was because Ava had told me. It was all very strange that my mother hid so much, but we never really thought about it or asked questions. It was no surprise this family was still filled with secrets; all of us knew better than to go against Mother’s wishes.
While I took out plates and drinking glasses the front door clicked open silently closing. I gulped my nerves picked up I didn’t feel so comfortable with this conversation after all.
Chapter Twelve
Ava
The day was spent going over Aidan’s likes and dislikes, foods he liked to eat, things he liked to do, knowing where everything in the house was, where his school was, who his teacher was, and who his friends’ and their parents were. On top of that, I had to deal with Dark Smolder and the sexy vibes he was releasing, having to keep from attacking him was draining.
After all that, the last thing I wanted to do was come home and have an emotional conversation with my cousin. But I knew it was now or never. I wanted to have Vanessa back in my life. Before I even opened the door, I could smell the Chinese food, and it made me smile. I found her standing in the kitchen, then I turned to the white quartz kitchen island, which was big enough to seat four people comfortably. Vanessa had set up dinner for two, and my heart ached at the gesture. Without warning, my eyes burned with tears. Jesus, I was turning into an emotional mess lately. For fuck’s sake, Ava, get a hold of yourself.
“Ava.” Vanessa put down the pitcher of water she had in her hands and quickly rounded the island. She hugged my neck while I squeezed my arms around the middle of her back. Our bodies trembled while we wheezed and cried together. After we managed to soak each other’s clothes in snot and tears, I pulled back so I could speak to her.
“The food’s probably cold by now.” I wiped the tears away from her eyes. Vanessa chuckled, then she stepped back and walked in the direction of the guest bathroom. She emerged with a box of tissues, and we both took a minute to wipe and blow into the soft pieces of paper. Vanessa motioned for me to sit. Before I could take my first bite, she began.
“You really hurt me.”
There goes my appetite. I sighed, because I knew that and I was disappointed in myself. I lowered the fork back to the plate, laying it flat. I turned to face her.
“I know, Van. And you don’t know how much that breaks my heart.”
“I want to know, I want to know everything.”
My throat had dried up and it was difficult to swallow. “I don’t know if I can do that,” I whispered, lowering my head.
“Please, Ava? Let’s put this to bed.”
“Okay, but you have to let me know if anything is too much.” I let out an uneven breath.
Vanessa nodded, and I saw the sincerity of her request in her eyes. She truly needed this to move on. So, I did the one thing I never wanted to do, I unleashed my story about Gabriel, trying my best not to go into any gruesome details. After everything was said and done, Vanessa slumped in her seat and was quiet for a long time.
Finally, she spoke. “What I still don’t understand is if he loved us both, why didn’t he just let us go? Why did he continue to see both of us?”
“I don’t know, Van.” I shrugged.
/> “I miss him, but I’m also really mad at him,” she whispered, fighting back tears.
“Me too.” I grabbed her hand, gently squeezing. “But, Van, you have to let that go. You can’t hold grudges against the dead. What good will that do? You’re fighting with air.”
“I feel guilty that I’m moving on in life and it doesn’t hurt as badly as it once did.” She looked up at me, her tears on the verge of spilling over.
“I know, sweets, but that’s what he would want. As cliché as it sounds, he loved you, and he would want you to live life to its fullest, that includes other boys.”
“Boys.” She said it like there was more than one meaning to it.
“Vanessa?”
“Yeah?” She stumbled back to the present, her cheeks turning rosy.
“What were you thinking about?”
“Oh, nothing.” She turned in her seat, grabbing her fork before stuffing her face.
Well, that was one way of ending the whole Gabriel conversation.
Since we were sitting on swiveling stools, I grabbed her knee and twirled her around to face me. “Na-uh, look at me. You went from all teary-eyed to flustered. What’s up? Is there more than one boy?”
“No, not really.” I could see the struggle in her eyes; she still didn’t trust me.
“All right, whatever you say.”
We ate in a comfortable silence until the front door buzzed. I stood and looked through the peephole, then saw a head of ruffled dirty blond hair and knew immediately who it was.
“Your brother is here,” I called back to Vanessa.
“Declan?”
“You have more than one brother?” I grunted and she spoke in a monotone.
“Ha-ha.”
“Will you bitches open the door? I can hear you, you know,” Declan shouted through the door. Suddenly we could hear another door fly open and the voice of a very angry woman. “No, ma’am, I wasn’t speaking to you—You’re right I should never call any woman a bitch—It is degrading—I’m sorry—Yes, I have manners.” As soon as I opened the front door, the neighbor from across the hall was slamming hers. Declan looked a little flustered.
“Your neighbor is a doll.” He scoffed, stepping inside.
“Serves you right, Declan Thomas.” Vanessa crossed her arms, glaring at her brother. He completely ignored her as he marched to the food in the kitchen.
“You two make up?” He waved my fork in front of his face with a mouthful of sesame chicken.
“Yes.”
“Bout fucking time, Jesus. Over some dude, girls, really?”
“Hold up, you don’t get to come to our apartment—unannounced by the way—eat our food and judge us. Do that in your own home.” I snatched my fork from his hands and sat down to eat my cold Chinese food. Just as Vanessa sat down, her phone sang “American Honey” by Lady Antebellum, and she looked down and smiled.
“Who’s that?” Declan frowned.
“It’s Stellen, I’ll be back.” She rose from the bar stool and we heard her greet him before closing her bedroom door. Declan’s body language had shifted he looked uncomfortable.
“Stellen?” he asked, crossing his arms over his chest.
“Yeah, her boyfriend.” I took a big bite of chicken and groaned. I didn’t realize how hungry I was.
“You and the chicken need a minute?” He chuckled, raising an eyebrow.
“Nope, finished him off already.” I grinned.
“You’re something else, you know that?”
For some reason, I got the feeling he was talking about something else. I wasn’t sure, and before I could figure it out, his mood was back to the same o’ playful Declan. I winked, pushing my food toward him to share.
***
The next morning, I woke up early, showered, dressed, and made coffee to go. Mr. Gallagher had given me an extra key and the code to the alarm, so I could get there and make breakfast for Aidan before waking him up, but when I arrived he was already up and dressed for his first day of school.
“Hey, bud.” I greeted little man while he held the front door open for me.
“Hey, Ava, guess what today is?”
“Hmm, your birthday?”
“I wish. No, it’s the first day of school!” He bounced up and down in place with excitement.
“Oh, that’s right, I completely forgot. It’s a good thing you’re so smart or else we’d be doomed.”
“I know.” He deadpanned, and I smiled. Cutie. My easygoing vibe soon vanished as Dark Smolder sauntered into the living room.
“Good morning,” he said, adjusting his dark blue tie.
He was dressed up in his professor attire and my-oh-my did he look good enough to eat. Seriously, how do his students focus?
He wore a light blue button-up shirt rolled to his elbows and a dark gray tweed vest that matched his slacks, the shirt and vest accentuated by the tie.
I happened to notice his tie was a bit lopsided, despite his attempts to fix it. Frowning, I stepped over to him and said, “here,” straightening and adjusting it for him. He smelled of dark coffee and cherries, the delicious scent flooding my nostrils, and all I want to do was snuggle against him and inhale.
“Do this much?” he asked, his eyebrow quirking upward.
“My dad was a blue-collar guy, so when he had meetings and my mother wasn’t around I would fix his tie for him.” I wasn’t sure why I had spilled all that information to him, but I was compelled to explain. He made it seem like I was fixing a lot of ties for a lot of men, and I didn’t want him thinking that. The only tie I wanted to fix was his. Wait…what?
His lips curved into a sweet, understanding smile, which made familiar warm sensations spread across my chest. I stiffened, and quickly finished fixing his tie before I backed away.
“Done.” I tilted my head to the side, appraising my work.
Mr. Gallagher frowned, but then cleared his expression to an impassive one. “Thank you, Ava.” He smiled tightly before I pivoted to focus my attention on his little carbon copy.
“Breakfast?” I asked.
“Pancakes!” Aidan announced, bumping his fist against mine.
***
That night, Blush was pretty slow, but toward the end of my shift I’d still made decent tips. I spent the entire night trying not to think about that damn professor.
“He’s hot,” Jade said, breaking me out of my thoughts as she nodded to the lone stranger at the end of the bar who I had helped on my first day here.
“Who, Diesel?” I asked, wiping a glass with a clean rag.
“You know him?”
“Not really, just asked for his ID. His name is Diesel Knox. He’s from Oklahoma. He comes in here with a bunch of construction guys.” I noticed Diesel’s beer was almost empty, so I walked over to him and asked, “Refill, doll?”
He grinned, taking the last swig of his beer. “Please, and can I get an order of your cheese fries?” He spoke with a slow southern drawl. If I weren’t so into the professor, my panties would have dissolved.
“Sure thing. I’m Ava, by the way.” I extended my hand, and he wiped his on a napkin before shaking mine.
“Diesel.”
“Yeah, from Oklahoma.” When he suddenly looked a little nervous, I added, “Your driver’s license.”
Diesel chuckled. “Right, right.”
“I’m not stalking you, doll. No offense, you’re hot and all, but you’re not my type.” Apparently, a much older man with dark hair and a beard was my type.
Diesel laughed. “None taken, darlin’, and no offense to you, but you ain’t my type either.”
I smiled wider. I like this dude; immediately, there was a friendship vibe between us. I popped the top off his cold beer before sliding it over to him.
While he took a drink, I tried to recreate his accent when I asked, “Big tits ain’t your type?”
Diesel spit a little of his beer in my direction; I had stepped away just in time. I laughed while he wiped the beer off his c
hin with his forearm and grinned at me. I winked in return, raising my water bottle in a toast as he raised his beer.
Chapter Thirteen
Vanessa
By the end of the school week, I was ready to unwind. College was a lot harder than I had expected, not to mention the fact my overbearing parents were now a permanent fixture in Denver. Since daddy was spending more time in town on account of the new buildings, Mother decided it was best to buy a condo in Washington Park. Lucky for me it was only about ten minutes away from my apartment. Joy.
Tonight, Stellen was hanging out with his parents and Mallory wanted to get together, so Ava suggested we visit the bar where she worked. Mallory didn’t need to be told twice; she squealed over the phone when I told her. Within twenty minutes, she had arrived at my apartment.
When she saw me, she didn’t bother hiding her horror.
“Van, you can’t wear that.” Mallory glared at me in distaste.
“What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?” I tugged at my cream colored blazer.
“This isn’t ladies who lunch, it’s a bar. Bring back some of the real Vanessa.”
I didn’t know why, but that hurt my feelings. It was a reminder this was all my mother and father’s influence; I was still following their demands and not standing up for myself. Something I said I would always do when I was piercing my face. Mallory had been witness to that, we’d had enough drunken conversations about how shitty our parents were for her to remember my declarations.
“Just for tonight, babe.” She spoke softly as if reading the expression on my face.
“Fine,” I walked into my closet, pulling out a pair of dark denim skinny jeans and a loose, green off-the-shoulder shirt, along with my white ballerina slippers. I threw the articles of clothing on the bed, placing my hands on my hips as I looked to Mallory for approval.