by C. J. Anaya
“Who?” Kirby asked.
“Amatsu.”
I lowered my head in my hands, wanting to curl up into a tiny ball. It was the last straw, really. The only way to get the prophecy was to actually get to Amatsu, something we were all actively trying to avoid.
Oh, the irony.
“How did Amatsu gain access to the prophecy?” Victor growled.
“Through Fukurokuju,” Hachiman said. “During our…captivity within the Ivory Palace, the gods of fortune and myself were tortured for specific information. Every single one of us is endowed with secrets and mysteries of the Universe that we use to perform our own roles as kami. We were all commanded to write what we knew upon sacred scrolls.”
“You mean, like a journal?” Kirby asked.
Hachiman gave him a kind smile.
“In some cases, yes, but mostly knowledge of things past, present, and future. For example, Fukurkuju is the god of longevity. His parchment scroll or makimono carries the names and lifespans of every person who ever has been and who ever will be. Not that he’s honored his role or his responsibility. In truth, he has used that very knowledge to thwart many plots against him and ruin countless lives.”
“Why is he allowed to continue then, if he has become so corrupt and evil?” my father asked.
Hachiman gazed at him in surprise. “Why choice, of course. It is the same old question of why bad things happen to good people. Why would our loving First Parents allow awful things to occur to people who deserve so much better? Simply put, they cannot interfere with the decisions made by their creations. The right to choose, to decide for oneself between right and wrong, is the very foundation for which nations have gone to war. The consequences must play out. A person’s intentions, inherent nature, and decisions must take their course. It is the only way for everyone to receive their just desserts in the end.”
“But so many innocent people suffer when bad choices are made,” Kirby argued.
“I agree,” Hachiman said. “And their pain and suffering is not only cast upon the head of the one responsible, but become a tool for learning and growth in the end. Could our First Parents prevent the evil Fukurokuju and Amatsu have perpetrated? Of course. But then how would anyone be tested and proved? How would any of us be given the chance to choose good in the face of evil? The human spirit’s capacity to fight for what is good and right is remarkable, always rising to the occasion when tyrants and oppressors exert their will. Everyone learns something vital throughout the process, and that is a huge part of why we are here in the first place. All we can take with us when we pass through the veil are our relationships with one another and the knowledge we have gained in this life.”
He let that sink in for a moment while I tried to come up with the courage to call him out on his blatant lie. How many times had I been given a choice when it came to my soul mate, my destiny, my role as The Healer? How many chances had I been given to exert my will and choose my own path? Had I done it anyway? Sure, but according to the prophecy my life had already been determined for me so where was the free will in all of that?
Pretty words, but I was too bitter to buy it.
“But I’m getting off topic,” he continued, eying me as if he understood my internal dilemma on the subject. “Fukurokuju saw the rest of the gods of fortune as competition and wished to have all their knowledge.”
“You’re not a god of fortune,” Ms. Mori said. “What knowledge did you have that he wished to know?”
“Since I’m the first born of our First Parents, my knowledge involves the creation of worlds.”
“Well, when one is considering total domination, I suppose one world isn’t enough for someone like Fukurokuju,” Angie muttered. “Did he think you had some kind of control over the Universe as well?”
“He certainly believed my knowledge would be useful,” Hachiman said evasively.
“How does any of this point to Amatsu having the prophecy?” my father asked.
“Fukurokuju was able to torture and retrieve quite a bit of information from some of the gods, including locations of these sacred scrolls.”
“And you think one of these scrolls is the prophecy?” Victor asked.
“It is the only solution I can come up with. I wasn’t aware that it would be so important until recently. None of us knew what the outcome would be after Tie gave Hope the Black Blossom, but it is my suspicion that Amatsu has been aware of this situation for some time and most likely wanted answers just like we did. Anyone intent on either saving or destroying the veil is going to need its complete and correct translation now.”
A memory tugged at the back of my mind and suddenly the words I overheard in Amatsu’s realm came flooding back to me with Amatsu’s frantic questions zinging like sharp darts against my brain.
“Are they near the palace, the forest, or are they closer to the shrine?…they are desperate for the prophecy. It is only a matter of time.”
“Fukurokuju can be relied upon to do his duty.”
I blinked at the intrusion and cleared my mind for a moment, but the implications were clear.
“Amatsu may be in control of the prophecy’s fate, but I don’t think it is in the Underworld,” I said.
“What are you talking about, Hope?” Tie asked.
“I think the prophecy might actually be in the palace under the watchful eye of Fukurokuju. It could be part of his duties as Amatsu’s prisoner.”
I quickly went over what I had heard during my brief visit to the Underworld. I tried not to let the slow burn of Tie’s anger distract me. He knew more than a simple conversation had occurred between me and Amatsu, and I was anxious to avoid that uncomfortable heart-to-heart for as long as possible.
How was I supposed to explain the attraction, the compulsion to love and give all of my heart to a being so wholly evil and repellent, no matter how he appeared on the outside. His core was black through and through, but I couldn’t stop my feelings for him any more than I could stop the rotation of the Earth around the Sun.
The group considered my thoughts, but Ms. Mori was the first to speak.
“You mentioned before that you believe Benzaiten is still alive,” she said to Daiki.
He nodded. “There is no evidence of her death. The very Earth would have announced it in one way or another.”
She nodded. “Isn’t she the goddess of wisdom and enlightenment? Stands to reason she would be capable of reading such ancient text and translating it for Amatsu.”
“But she hasn’t yet,” Hachiman said, a slow gleam of excitement overtaking his calm exterior. “Amatsu wouldn’t be so worried about us finding it if she had given in to his demands. He wouldn’t need it anymore if he had a translation and most likely would have destroyed it by now. She’s refused him for centuries.”
“Under Fukurokuju’s torture most likely,” Victor stated.
“And they’re all at the palace,” I said.
“A palace that only recognizes kami blood,” Tie said. “I know where you’re going with this, but any non-kami outsiders not sanctioned entry will set off an alarm within seconds. If we breach the palace walls, we can’t take Kirby, your father, or Angie with us.”
“And leaving the enchantments of this shrine present an entirely different problem,” Daiki said. “Amatsu knows you’re all here. There will be guards, sentries, and search parties crossing every treacherous foot from here to the palace. At least directly.”
“What about indirectly?” I asked.
“I suppose we could enter the forest and make a wide circle around to the other side of the palace, but even if we don’t encounter any nekomata along the way, we will still run into them the closer we get to our destination no matter which direction we come from,” Daiki said. “The woods are not quite as hospitable as they were centuries before. Amatsu’s evil has leaked out and warped the wildlife and even the very plants and trees. The woods will be just as dangerous to navigate. And then once we’re in, how do we proceed? We h
ave no idea where Fukurokuju is keeping the prophecy or where Benzaiten is.”
My mind raced back to the dungeon and the secret door that gave access to it. I could almost smell its dank mustiness as memories of pain and torture—some of it my own—ensnared me in their powerful grip. I swallowed hard and unclenched both my hands which had been gripping the edge of the table, turning my knuckles white.
“I know exactly where she is, and once we find her, she’ll take us to the prophecy.”
“How do you know?” Bishu asked.
I decided a full explanation of my knowledge concerning the dungeons was better served for another day. “I just do. The emperor gave me access to many of his prisoners when he sought information from them.”
The only hint Bishu gave that he grasped my meaning was a softening of his gaze and a sadness around his eyes. He nodded his understanding and let it go. It amazed me that he was always able to demonstrate so much compassion with a face so beastly and grotesque. Hopefully, we would get the chance very soon to restore him to his former glory.
“So it’s a rescue and retrieval mission, eh?” Angie said. “There’s no way you’re keeping me out of this.”
“Angie,” I warned.
“Douse me with kami blood,” she insisted.
“You can’t be serious,” Victor argued.
“Acutally, if she were to wear a vial of kami blood around her neck, she would be able to enter without a hitch,” Daiki said. “Every human would.” He remained blissfully ignorant of the glares Bishu and Victor leveled at him, not to mention the animosity from Ms. Mori at the mention of Kirby’s possible involvement. These insights into her mothering side were very bittersweet. Sweet that she felt so strongly for Kirby. Bitter that she’d never mustered an ounce of that tenderness for me.
“We can discuss who is going and who is staying later,” I said. “I think at the moment we can all agree that our next move is to map out a strategy for traveling to and breaking into the palace. Once in, I can take you where I suspect my father is holding Benzaiten.”
“You’re positive of the dungeon’s location, Hope?” Ms. Mori asked. “The palace has many twists and turns designed to confuse trespassers.”
“I’m no trespasser, and Fukurokuju is a creature of habit. Evil habits die hard, especially for someone as diabolical as the emperor.”
Hachiman surveyed the group for a moment and then nodded in agreement before he stood.
“Very well. Let’s all get some rest. We’ll begin our plans for this somewhat suicidal adventure later this afternoon.”
There were enough rooms in this spacious temple to provide us each with our own private area, but most of us wanted to bunk together anyway. Angie refused to relinquish her roomie status, stating that BFFs held a higher claim than even the title of soul mate. I humored her even though I couldn’t help but wonder if I was kicking Tie out in order to avoid discussing the obvious weakening of our bond or the feelings I experienced in Amatsu’s presence.
I’d turned out to be a pretty crappy soul mate.
Since the probability of nekomata breaking into the temple was slim to none, Tie wasn’t able to argue his need for his protective presence within my room, and to be honest, he didn’t even try. Proof that he really had given in to the idea that I would eventually belong to Amatsu.
I ground my teeth in frustration when he gave me a sad look, turned around, and walked away from me. I didn’t know what to do to fix this rift between us.
My father decided to bunk with Tie. Bishu looked longingly at Angie before departing to another room on the same floor. Angie seemed oblivious since she was giving Victor the evil eye after his less than stellar behavior during lunch. Kirby was only too happy to let Ms. Mori guide him to another bedroom down the hall where she could make certain he received a proper bath before tucking him into bed.
My heart lightened at Kirby’s spike of happiness, thrilled that Ms. Mori had so wholly taken over the role of mom. He gave me a quick hug and then grabbed her hand. Ms. Mori’s gaze met mine for a brief moment before they continued down the hall. The eye-contact conveyed a message I wasn’t sure I understood, but it was obvious she had wanted to say something to me, yet didn’t know exactly how to proceed.
No surprise there. We’d never actually succeeded in communicating well with one another in my first life. Navigating the complexities of our relationship now seemed like something we should continue to avoid.
Much easier, and I had enough on my plate to deal with at the moment.
Our room was simply arranged with thin mattresses folded up and put to the side. We easily laid these out, found a thin covering and pillow and made some comfy beds on the floor.
Hachiman had assured me that the enchantments over the area would prevent Amatsu from pulling me to him during a dream. I was safer here under the protective spells than anywhere else on the planet. I wasn’t about to look a gift horse in the mouth, either. I was so tired, I didn’t think I was up for any girl talk from Angie even though I could tell she had quite a bit on her mind. Despite the pressing need she felt to discuss…whatever…she actually fell asleep before I finished tucking myself into the soft cover provided. The moment my head hit the pillow, I began my soothing descent into blissful unconsciousness.
A presence next to me startled me awake. I gasped at the shadowy figure hovering above me. I let out a relieved sigh when it said, “Relax, Hope. It’s just me.”
I groggily sat up and held out my hand. Tie lowered himself next to me and reluctantly accepted it. I nearly pulled away at his hurtful attitude. Did he even want to be my soul mate anymore? I wasn’t sure I could fight the good fight for someone who had fallen out of love with me.
“Is it time to wake up?”
Tie looked a little guilty.
“No. I’m sorry to wake you. I know you need the sleep, but…I just wanted to tell you. I’ve come to an important decision about…us.”
I sighed. “Spit it out, Tie.”
“I feel like I’ve done more damage by loving you than by leaving you alone. Once this is all over, I think you should move on, forget about me. I think we should go our separate ways.”
I don’t know why his breaking up with me was so shocking. In hindsight his behavior had been leading up to this. I should have expected it, but this pronouncement nearly broke me. I was pretty sure my heart momentarily stuttered and stopped.
“You don’t love me anymore?”
His gave me a look filled with agony. “It isn’t that. I will always love you, but I’ve hurt you more than I’ve helped you. My selfish love for you moved me to hand you that blossom, and look at the consequences.”
“It was definitely a mistake, but I understand why you did it, and I believe we can still fix it,” I said. “I had a part to play in the build-up of that. I wasn’t honest with you. I deceived you. Your actions were understandable.”
“It didn’t make them right.”
“We were both in the wrong so we both need to work together to solve this problem.”
Tie nodded. “I’ll continue to help you fight the bond, but when and if we actually get out of this with our lives intact, I’m going to let you go. Live your life with someone more worthy of you than I am.”
“Who? Victor?”
His nostrils flared in irritation. It was a low blow, but I had to snap him out of his desire to play the martyr. I felt like I was dealing with the old Tie, the Musubi version, the one who fought against his love for me for so long I nearly gave up hoping he would come around.
“You are the only person I need. The only person I want.”
“What happened when you traveled to the Underworld?”
His redirect caught me off guard. I did not want to go into detail about this. This change in topic would end badly. I knew that, and he did too. I could only assume he meant to speed up the process of getting over me and being done with it by inflicting this unnecessary pain on both of us.
I delivered my a
nswer in as neutral a tone as possible. “Amatsu said he loved me. That I was his. When he realized I was there in physical form, he grabbed me and kissed me.”
“That’s why I almost lost you?”
“Yes. He nearly forced my ascension.”
“Did you like it?”
“Why would you ask me that?”
“Did. You. Like. It?”
I stared straight ahead and delivered the words that were sure to end our relationship.
“I didn’t just like it, Tie, I loved it. Thanks for making me say it.”
Tie remained silent next to me, but his anger, hurt, and frustration were their own language, and I was seriously receiving a mouthful.
“You do realize this isn’t by choice, right?” I asked. “I chose to love you. I never chose to love Amatsu.”
“But you love him either way,” he said in a sad voice. “I’ve really lost you, haven’t I?”
“You have if you’ve already given up.” I closed my eyes and let the tears stream down my cheeks. “I feel so alone in this. Like I’m the only one who believes we still stand a chance. The more I fight to hold on to what we have, the more distant you become. If you’re done with me, please say so now because I’m tired of fighting what you think is so inevitable.”
“That’s not fair,” Tie argued.
“It’s reality,” I shot back, finally looking at him. I was seething inside. Furious that we’d reached this point in our relationship. “You either love me and believe that we can get through this or you’ve given up on me and have no desire to see this thing through. I’m not going to pretend that I’m worth much, that I ever thought I deserved you, or that I understood what exactly you saw in me, but even if the thought of being with me repulses you now, I would think you’d at least have enough decency within your heart to fight for me long and hard enough to save mankind.”
He grabbed my chin and pulled me to him, roughly delivering a kiss that sent heat searing through my chest. I desperately clung to him, needing the warmth and power of his ki now more than ever. The kiss only lasted a few moments and then he broke from me, capturing my gaze with his heated one.