by C. J. Anaya
Tie tried to pull away from me, his sadness and despair at the knowledge that he couldn’t get rid of Amatsu’s bond threatened to ruin the intimacy we shared. I didn’t want every kiss to be an attempt to save me. I didn’t want every affectionate exchange to be a way to force me to ascend. I just wanted to show him how much I loved him. How much I cared. When he tried to break away from our kiss, I refused. When he attempted to disconnect, I held him to me with a strength I don’t believe I’d ever shown him before.
Leave me?
I don’t think so.
He immediately responded, and crushed me to him, deepening the kiss and giving me nothing but his ardent selfless love.
This was Tie. Musubi. My soul mate. The man I loved.
For centuries I’d waited to be reunited with the man I knew to be mine, and even though our situation seemed absolutely hopeless, I wasn’t about to allow anything or anyone to take him from me, including the man himself.
“I love you,” I said once we came up for air.
His blue eyes glowed warm and bright as we gazed at each other.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” he said.
“You saved me. You have no reason to apologize.”
“I’m talking about our last conversation, and the idiotic things I spouted off. I’ve done a fair bit of sulking over this situation, and I’ve been avoiding you because of how ashamed I am that I got you into this. This was a wake-up call for me. I almost lost you just now, and it nearly broke me. Even if I wanted to let you go out of a sense of guilt for my past sins, I can’t do it now.” He stroked my hair and placed a gentle kiss on my forehead. “I’m not going to stand back and allow Amatsu to take control over you, take you from me, while I sit back and punish myself, feeling as if maybe I deserve that. As if my happiness is destined to be ruined. It’s like a self-fulfilling prophecy I’ve never been able to see my way out of. Almost as if I can’t do anything to prevent your eventual loss.” He stroked my cheek with his finger and pulled me closer to him. “It’s my choice, though. As you said before, I either sit back and decide losing you is inevitable or I fight for you like I’ve always fought for you. You and I belong with each other, and I won’t accept anything less.”
I blinked back a few tears and rested my head against his shoulder. His solid presence and support, his willingness to finally confront the distance that had grown between us let me know that somehow we were going to see this thing through together. My permanent bond with Amatsu wasn’t a foregone conclusion. Not so long as Tie believed in us.
Hachiman cleared his throat to grab our attention. His grimace conveyed his reluctance to interrupt.
“I’m afraid we are too exposed out here. There is a very good chance Amatsu has sent some of his minions to penetrate the shrine now that it has weakened.”
“How did they break through?” Tie asked. “We stood guard over Hope’s statue for centuries, and not once did Amatsu and his followers manage to break through the enchantments. What went wrong?”
Hachiman’s sorrow blindsided me as he said, “The enchantments were not breached from the outside, my friends. They were attacked and weakened by someone from within. We either have a traitor amongst us, or a nekomata disguised as a monk.
Tie’s rage simmered just under the surface. “We need to discover which it is before we map out the details of our palace break-in. We don’t want this traitor to communicate our plans to Amatsu.”
I looked between Tie and Hachiman. “How do we find out if the traitor is a real monk or a nekomata?”
“Perhaps I can assist you with that,” Bishu said, startling us all.
I looked past Hachiman and found Bishu and Angie approaching us.
Angie broke into a run and nearly tackled me before I broke out of Tie’s embrace.
I returned her fierce hug, grateful she hadn’t been wounded like last time.
“You’re not allowed to go flying out of a bedroom window with an ugly, hairy cat the size of Tulsa,” she said. She choked off some emotion and pulled back to look at me. Her eyes were bright with unshed tears and her bottom lip trembled. “I couldn’t get to you fast enough. You were right there and then you were gone.”
“Enough of that,” I said. I held her tight as she burst into tears. She rarely cried, which made this all the more heart-wrenching to witness. I hated to think for one second that she blamed herself for any of this. “There was nothing you could do, Angie. Stop berating yourself for something you couldn’t control.”
She nodded, but kept her head buried in my shoulder as her cries turned into hiccups. I raised my eyes and met Bishu’s. He made it a point to push as much emotion toward Angie as he could, knowing full well I would feel it. I was enfolded in a love so pure I nearly wept on Angie’s behalf.
Dear heavens above, this kami was not going to make Angie’s life or her future choices easy to deal with. He would pursue her. I was certain of it. He was also communicating in no uncertain terms that if anything terrible should happen to me, if I couldn’t be there for her, he most certainly would. I didn’t know whether to feel grateful or apprehensive. In my experience, loving a kami had not been a walk in the proverbial park, but I wouldn’t go back and choose an easier path. Angie would have that same choice to make soon enough.
“How can you help us root out the traitor?” Hachiman asked.
Bishu approached our group in two easy strides. I was never going to get used to how massive he was as a nekomata.
“Line all of the monks up in front of the temple. I will change into each of them one at a time. If one of them is a nekomata it will not be able to hold its form when I appropriate it.”
“Really? Nekomata aren’t able to take on the same form at the same time?” I asked. Angie finally released me and turned to face the group.
“It’s because of their energy, right?” she asked. “In order for a nekomata to transform into the human it has killed, it has to absorb the human’s energy. If you steal its human form you steal its energy and it can’t sustain the illusion.”
Bishu gave her an appreciative nod. “That is correct. Angela is a quick study.”
Angie bent her head to hide her deep blush.
“Let’s return and put this theory of yours to the test,” Hachiman said.
I didn’t bother counting the monks lined up several rows deep in front of the temple. I had no idea how Bishu was going to manage this. From what I understood, changing your form without absorbing someone’s ki was exhausting, and he wouldn’t be able to absorb anyone’s until he came across the real culprit, assuming we were actually dealing with a nekomata.
I needn’t have worried on his behalf. Once he started down the front row of monks, changing into the exact replica of each one and startling the crap out of everyone present, a lone monk in the back got very fidgety. I kept my eye on him and inched to the left away from our group, hoping to get a better look at his facial expressions since I couldn’t get a read on his emotions. Not that this signified anything. Most of the monks were very good at blocking me out, but I felt literally nothing from this guy. Just as Bishu started in on the second row, the nervous monk broke from the line and made a mad dash for the outer boundary toward the Holy Cherry Tree. His movements blurred as his form changed into that of a very muscular panther. A huge cat with two tails.
Before I could blink, Bishu used his inhuman speed to catch up with the traitor. Leaping through the air, his foot made direct contact with the nekomata’s back. The creature screamed and hissed as Bishu’s clawed feet found purchase and left deep gouges in its back. It went down fast. Bishu pulled out his sword and cut its head off before the beast had time to recover.
As he turned around, blood dripping from his sword, hairy chest heaving from the exertion, the angry grimace on his face made me take a few steps back.
“So Bishu’s kind of scary,” Angie whispered next to me.
“Yeah.”
Then I noticed the blood staining his chest and the
large cut across the pectoral muscles.
His knees collapsed and he went down hard.
Oh, crap. It got him.
That damn nekomata clawed him before it died. Angie and I were in a race as to who could get to him the fastest. Shouts followed behind us, but I kept pumping my arms and legs, afraid Bishu would be dead before Angie and I got to him. He slumped all the way to the ground, laying on his side. When we finally reached him, a green substance joined the blood on his chest and coated the wound.
Getting clawed by a nekomata seemed to be as bad as getting stabbed by one of its swords. Angie grabbed his shoulders and rested his head in her lap as I placed my hands on his whiskery cheeks and connected with him.
The inky blackness had already spread to his heart. I knew how to fix it, but I realized that the blackness didn’t intend to kill him so much as it intended to attack the part of Bishu’s ki that had managed to remain pure and wholesome. If that happened, I wasn’t sure if we would be dealing with the same Bishu. The one who was on our side. The one who had fought against the demon god’s influence and managed to retain a large chunk of his humanity.
If he was completely tainted, could it influence his choices and his actions the way Amatsu’s bond influenced mine?
I wasn’t about to test that theory. If the blackness fought to make him a hundred percent evil then it was time to reverse the process the only way I knew how.
I pulled away from him, grabbed the small knife at my waist and made a large cut across my palm.
“What are you doing?” Angie asked.
Bishu began thrashing wildly, which sent Angie sprawling backward. Fortunately, Tie and Victor got on either side of him and grabbed his arms.
“Pin him down,” I shouted. They did as they were told, but even with kami as strong as Tie and Victor, I wasn’t sure any kami was a match for Bishu’s immense strength. Angie recovered and pushed down on the large cat’s shoulders.
“Angie, I need you to pry his mouth open so I can get this in his system,” I said. She nodded and worked to pull his jaws apart. That became tricky when he snapped his jaws shut, nearly biting her fingers off.
“You stupid, stubborn, hellcat, we’re trying to fix you, so hold still.” She grew impatient and landed a punch to the side of his jaw that left him too stunned to fight for a few seconds. Angie pulled his jaws open and I squeezed as much of my blood into his mouth as I could before his head began thrashing again. She gave him another punch to the side of the head, which forced him to choke down some blood. I squeezed more in and then shut his mouth and shook him a little to make sure he swallowed it.
His legs bucked to the side nearly knocking me over, and then he let out the most frightening, feral, growl I’d ever heard any of his kind make. We were running out of time.
“Now what?” Tie asked.
“Hold him still so I can bond the blood to his cells,” I yelled.
His eyes opened into green slits, the black pupils infused with hatred. I shut my eyes tight, grabbed his head and connected as quickly as possible. There was a single pinprick of light left within his ki. I frantically attached myself to its faint glow before it disappeared from me. Holding fast to the last vestiges of Bishu’s godlike identity, I wrapped my ki around it as a sort of barricade to buy us some time. Then I went to work on bonding the blood to his cells, making certain the healing properties within my blood coated them and then reversed the malformation within the nucleus.
I paused in my instructions for a moment to expand my barricade around his ki as it began to grow in diameter and circumference. It was exactly what I wanted, but I was attempting too many things at once and couldn’t bond my blood to his cells while barricading his ki against the poison from his wound. As I debated how to better multi-task, the reformed cells took over and his ki’s energy exploded with light. It didn’t need my protection any longer.
His ki didn’t need my instructions either. The metamorphosis from within became so blinding in its intensity, I had to disconnect or risk being consumed by it.
I blinked open my eyes and took in his face, his human face, as the rest of his body slowly changed back into human form. The process continued on from his neck, to his chest, his waist, to his legs and down to his bare feet.
He was completely whole, and I was completely exhausted. My shaky legs no longer supported me. Tie reached an arm around me and eased me against his chest, stroking my back and telling me how much he loved me.
Victor stared at Bishu in amazement and then raised his eyes to meet mine.
“Well, that was a hell of a thing,” he said.
Tie let out a loud chuckle, diffusing the current tension. Angie still had Bishu’s head on her lap, studying him with anxious eyes.
“Does this mean he’ll be okay?” she asked. “I mean, I don’t understand what you did or even what you saved him from.”
“The wound poisoned him and attacked the last pure part of his ki,” I said. “If it had succeeded, we would have lost him entirely to Amatsu. I had to bring him back completely, restore him to his original form and bond my blood to his, something I had planned on doing once we got here, I just hadn’t planned on doing it under such stressful circumstances.”
“You mean he’s not a nekomata anymore?” she asked.
“No.”
She nodded. I studied her, uncertain as to what exactly she felt.
“Well, I’m glad you were able to save him. For a moment there…” she paused and cleared her throat, “I thought he was dying. I thought…” she paused again to look at Bishu and then she brushed back some of his jet black hair from his face. She glanced up at Victor and caught him openly studying her reaction to the newly reformed god.
“Do you love him?” he asked.
Angie’s eyes nearly popped out of their sockets.
“Do you care?”
Victor, aggravated by her response, shook his head. “You didn’t answer my question. Do you love him, Angie?”
I nearly opened my mouth to intervene and tell Victor to back off, but Tie’s soft squeeze on my shoulder stopped me. He wanted me to let them have this conversation, even if we were here to witness it. Not very private, but I guess if Victor was finally willing to communicate a little, it was best I didn’t interrupt.
Angie’s eyes searched his for some kind of hint as to why he was even asking her such a pointed, personal question. From the way her shoulders sagged and her eyebrows narrowed it didn’t seem like she’d received much clarity.
“I’m seventeen, Victor. I’ve never loved anybody before.”
“But you’ve…had boyfriends.”
“Yes.”
“So you’ve been in love before.”
“I can’t afford to love anyone or get close to anyone because any physical contact with them shows me how and when they will die. I accidentally bumped into Ben Taylor in sixth grade and saw him dying in a car accident. I asked him out and made sure he and his family came to my birthday party on the day they were all supposed to die. I convinced Dalin Richards to ditch the last half of school in eighth grade so he wouldn’t get hit by a bus in the pick-up area. I dated a few guys I witnessed dying from severe football injuries, and even had a long distance relationship with a foreign exchange student so he would miss his connecting flight home and not get shot during a terrorist attack in France.”
My mind flashed through all of the various, short-lived relationships Angie had been involved in over our middle and high school years. I always assumed she couldn’t stick to one guy because of all of her daddy issues even though I found it odd considering how much love Angie had to give. I knew she wasn’t truly flighty, and I knew she cared more fiercely about people than anyone ever gave her credit for, but this explanation put everything into focus. It made me realize just how selfless my best friend had always been, not just with me, but with everyone she had the unfortunate luck of making physical contact. My admiration for this girl new no bounds at this point.
Si
mply put, Angie was the most amazing woman I knew.
“My relationships revolve around keeping people alive. Falling in love with someone and then monitoring their mortality for the rest of my life would be exhausting. Making sure Kirby and Dr. Fairmont are going to survive this ordeal hasn’t been a cakewalk either. I’m not in love with anyone, Victor. I don’t want to be.”
Victor grabbed her hand and held it fast. Angie gasped, her eyes going out of focus and then narrowing back in on Victor.
“All I’m hearing is that having a relationship with someone mortal is a no-go for you. What about someone immortal?”
Angie swallowed hard, and I held my breath. I wondered if all of this had been too heavy for her. I waited for her to make one of her notorious quips, lighten the mood, and pretend that Victor hadn’t hinted at his interest in her, but she maintained eye-contact and kept her jokes to herself, bless her heart. It couldn’t have been easy.
“What do you see when you touch me, Angie?” he pressed. He lightly rubbed his thumb against the back of her hand.
She sucked in a sharp breath and bit her bottom lip, looking thoroughly out of her element. Considering Angie was the queen of guy/girl banter, her awkwardness was disconcerting on so many levels. Just when I thought Victor might succeeded in getting a serious response out of her, Bishu shifted a little and made a muffled groaning sound.
Angie released Victor’s hand and placed it on Bishu’s chest, shaking him a little.
His eyes popped open and then a grin spread wide across his face as he took in Angie’s face peering over him.