by Judith Stacy
“Now,” she said, “tell me what sort of wife you’re looking for.”
“I’ll take number six.”
“Number six in the catalog?” Amanda asked.
The brides’ pictures were numbered, no names given. Amanda kept most of the women’s personal information separate. That way the slots in the catalog could be used over again, and the women’s names weren’t available to the public in general.
“Yeah, that’s the one I want,” Bill said. He reared back in his chair and crossed his ankle casually over his knee. “That there catalog of yours says she’s a widow. That’s the one I want. One that’s already broke in.”
Jason came out of his chair and circled the desk before Bill Braddock had time to uncross his leg, towering over him, clenching his fists.
“Shut your filthy mouth,” Jason snarled. “That’s a lady you’re talking to.”
Bill’s eyes got big as he slouched farther in the chair, gazing up at Jason.
Amanda’s face turned bright red.
“No, Mr. Kruger, you got me all wrong,” Bill said, holding up his palms. “I just meant I wanted a wife who was used to cooking and cleaning and knew how to wash clothes. That’s all. I didn’t mean nothing else. I swear.”
Jason glared down at him for another moment, curling and uncurling his fists, then backed off. He glanced at Amanda and her scarlet face.
“Just watch what you say,” Jason told Bill, then went back to his desk.
An extremely awkward moment passed while Amanda pretended her face wasn’t red and that another fight hadn’t almost broken out. Finally she concluded her interview with Bill Braddock. He paid her fee, then left.
A tense silence filled the office. Jason turned the pages in his ledger, nearly ripping them out. Amanda stacked her papers with a vengeance.
“Any more trouble you can cause for one day?” Jason asked.
“Me?” Amanda sat straighter in her chair. “I didn’t cause that. I didn’t do anything. You’re the one who tried to start a fight.”
“What the hell did you expect me to do, sit here and let Braddock talk to you like that?”
“No,” Amanda told him. “I expected you to sit there and mind your own business.”
Jason came to his feet. “This is my business. Everything on this mountain is my business.”
Angry, Amanda opened her mouth, but no words came out. Exhaustion overwhelmed her. She didn’t have it in her for another battle with Jason tonight.
“Since you want to be in charge of everything,” Amanda said, “would you ask Shady to send in the next man?”
He looked at her, then stomped over to the door. Amanda was certain she heard him say something to the next man who came in, but she couldn’t tell what it was. She decided it was just as well.
The evening wore on and Amanda got all five interviews completed. Shady brought her catalog inside and she packed it into her satchel along with her orders and other supplies.
Neither she nor Jason had said a word to each other since Bill Braddock left the office.
“You want to put that cash in the safe?”
Jason’s words jarred Amanda out of her thoughts. She looked up at him, then down at the money she’d collected, and was about to stuff into her satchel.
“Everybody in camp knows you’ve got it,” Jason said, waving toward the money. “Those locks on your cabin doors won’t keep anybody out if they’re determined to get in.”
Amanda blanched. She hadn’t thought she wouldn’t be safe in her cabin, on Jason’s mountain. The feeling that she was vulnerable troubled her.
“Do you think I’m going to lock it in my safe and not give it back to you?” Jason asked, a tinge of annoyance in his voice. “I’m not going to steal it from you.”
He’d steal her heart, but never her money.
That thought ricocheted through her mind. Gracious, why had such a notion come to her?
“I trust you,” Amanda said, and held out the cash. “With my money, anyway.”
Jason paused a moment before he took it from her. When he did, their fingers brushed. Both pretended it didn’t happen.
“Well, good night,” Amanda said, picking up her satchel.
He glanced back over his shoulder as he headed for the big, black safe sitting in the back corner of the office.
“You’re leaving?” he asked.
She paused. “It’s late. We both should get into—”
Bed.
The unspoken word hung between them, charging the air and causing Amanda’s spine to prickle. Jason’s eyes seemed to see right through her to her pounding heart. It was as if he could read the naughty thoughts racing through her mind.
Amanda grabbed her satchel and hurried out of the office.
Chapter Twelve
What was happening to her?
Amanda trudged up the mountain toward her cabin—at least in the direction she thought her cabin was in. She couldn’t be certain in the dark.
Since coming to this mountain, she wasn’t certain of anything anymore.
The satchel Amanda carried dragged like a boat anchor, slowing her pace further over the rough terrain. She was tired, nearly exhausted. The tiniest pain throbbed in her head. Her arm muscles hurt from moving furniture and scrubbing, and her face muscles ached from smiling through supper.
In general, she was a mess. And Amanda was never a mess. At least, she’d never been one until she came to the lumber camp. Now, nothing was the same. Certainly not herself.
Through the shadows and the trees, Amanda made out the outline of her little cabin. Her home. Such as it was.
Another thing that was different.
Visions of her home in San Francisco played in Amanda’s mind as she climbed the porch, found the lock with the key she kept in her pocket, and went inside.
She stood in the doorway for a moment. If she tried hard, could she imagine she was about to step into her neat little parlor back home, with her doilies, lace and china figurines?
Amanda felt her way inside, found the lantern on the wall beside the door, located the matches and struck one. Sulphur burned her nose as it sparked to life. She touched it to the lantern’s wick, then lowered the glass chimney.
Slowly, Amanda turned. Her shoulders slumped. The little cabin looked just as she remembered. And nothing like her home in San Francisco.
In the silence, Amanda closed the door, undressed and slipped into her pink nightgown. The air in the cabin was stuffy from being closed all day. She pushed two of the windows open, letting in the cool night air.
Standing in the middle of her little cabin, the silence roaring in her ears, reality hit Amanda square on the chin. Jason had been right. This mountain wasn’t a place for women.
The fight in the cookhouse tonight served up proof of that. Jason’s attitude toward her confirmed it.
Maybe he was right about everything, Amanda mused. She didn’t belong here. Going home suddenly seemed like a very good idea.
Loneliness and sadness overwhelmed Amanda. Tears stung her eyes. She sniffed them back, put on her robe and went out onto the back porch. It was quiet, so very quiet. All she saw from her little porch was darkness. Not a single light shone anywhere up the mountain. There were none of the sights or sounds of the city she was used to.
Slowly, Amanda sat down on the steps. Through the canopy of leaves, a thousand stars winked down at her. She leaned her head back, bracing her elbows on the step behind her, and searched the night sky.
She’d already promised she’d stay. She’d given her word that she’d bring her brides here. The loggers were anxious for them. But Jason…
Tears swelled in Amanda’s eyes once more. Jason didn’t want her brides here. He’d only agreed to the whole thing because he needed to keep his crew happy while he filled the railroad contract.
A tear rolled down Amanda’s cheek. More than that, Jason didn’t want her here.
Hurt coiled deep in her belly. Amanda crossed her arms in
front of her, holding the ache inside. A tear trickled down her cheek.
Maybe she should give Jason what he wanted, she thought. Maybe she should leave.
Jason hadn’t liked supper tonight one bit. All those other men staring at Amanda. Her sitting right there at the table for all of them to look at, ogle, think all sorts of things about.
Never mind that he’d been thinking those same things.
Jason closed his ledgers and stacked them on the corner of his desk. Without wanting to, he glanced at the chair Amanda had sat in tonight.
As if supper hadn’t been enough to endure, he’d had to listen while she talked to his loggers. That hadn’t suited him either. He’d had to sit there while she asked them questions, smiled at them, made pleasant remarks about their pasts, inquired what sort of wife they wanted—smelling good the whole time.
Jason shoved the ledgers into one of the cupboards. That had been the last straw. He’d nearly come to blows with one of his men, breaking his own rule about no fighting in camp.
Amanda Pierce had turned everything upside down. Including him.
The door swung open and Ethan strode into the office, smiling.
“Miss Pierce left already?” he asked.
“Yeah,” Jason grumbled, slamming the cupboard door.
Ethan eyed the makeshift desk. “Is this what you gave her to do her work on?”
“What’s wrong with it?” Jason demanded.
“It’s just so damn warm and inviting I’m surprised she’s not spending the night down here,” Ethan told him.
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
“You know what I mean,” Ethan told him. He shook his head. “Why don’t you relax and enjoy her company, Jas? It won’t last forever.”
Jason snorted. “Won’t last forever? In another few weeks there’ll be women swarming all over this mountain.”
“Yeah,” Ethan said. “But Amanda won’t be one of them.”
Jason stopped suddenly, then turned to his brother, his brows drawn together, his face pale.
Ethan shook his head. “You didn’t think Amanda would stay here, did you?”
“Well…”
“Once the brides are married off and settled, Amanda’s job will be done. She’ll be gone.”
“I know that,” Jason insisted.
“Then how come you’ve got that stupid look on your face?”
Jason brushed by his brother. “Lock up, will you? I’m going home.”
Closing the office door behind him, Jason stopped at the edge of his porch and drew in a breath of fresh air. The camp was settling in for the night. It was cool. A few lights burned in the bunkhouse and in the building in town.
He liked this time of day. Evening, when things quieted down, the men and their problems were out of his hair and he could relax.
His gaze wandered to the cabins scattered on the hillside, to the smallest cabin, the one farthest up the mountain.
Amanda’s cabin.
He’d known she wouldn’t be on his mountain forever. Really, he’d known that.
But Amanda had held such a presence since coming here, and occupied so much of his time, he couldn’t imagine her not being around. She seemed to belong here as much as anyone did—as much as he did.
Jason grumbled a curse at himself under his breath. What the hell was he thinking? Amanda didn’t belong here. She was a city woman. A refined, proper lady. She didn’t have what it took to live on his mountain.
His gaze traveled to Amanda’s cabin again. A soft yellow light glowed through the window. She was still awake.
What was she doing? Jason watched the window but saw no shadows move across them. Was she having something to eat? Getting ready for bed? Undressing? Bathing?
Maybe she was already in bed, snuggled under the coverlet. In a nightgown? Naked?
Buck naked, maybe. Her supple body spread out on the—
“Hellfire!”
Jason stomped off the porch and headed toward home. Just like Ethan said, in a few weeks Amanda Pierce would be gone. And that suited him fine. The woman was nothing but one problem after another. He’d be glad to see her off his mountain.
Wouldn’t he?
Jason stopped. He squinted in the darkness at the outline of his own house tucked into the shadows.
He turned, gazing up the mountain. Though he knew better, Jason hiked toward Amanda’s cabin.
It wouldn’t do her reputation any good if he was seen there at this time of the night. Above all, Amanda was a lady. She wouldn’t appreciate him putting her in a compromising situation.
Jason didn’t stop, though. He kept going.
This was his mountain, he decided. And he could hike up to anybody’s cabin, anytime he saw fit. Including Miss Amanda Pierce.
His mountain or not, Jason came to his senses as he made his way up the hillside. He swung left in the general direction of the sawmill. Though it was doubtful anyone would see him tramping through the dark woods at this time of night, he wasn’t about to set tongues wagging. He circled through the trees and came up on Amanda’s cabin from the rear.
Light still shone from the windows so he knew she was awake. Twigs snapped under his feet as he crept closer. A shadow formed out of the darkness of the back porch and Jason realized that Amanda was outside, sitting on the steps.
Jason’s feet dragged to a halt and he swallowed hard. She had on a nightgown and robe. The cool mountain air heated up a little as Jason stood there watching her.
He couldn’t make out her face. Her hands covered it. She leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees.
Jason turned his head, listening.
Sobs. He heard sobs.
Amanda was crying.
Thunderstruck, Jason charged out of the woods toward the cabin. Vivid images of what may have happened to her flooded his mind, filling him with a fear that cut him in half.
He raced up to her and dropped to his knees in front of her.
“What’s wrong?”
Amanda’s head came up quickly. Startled, she yelped and leaned away from him.
“No, it’s okay,” Jason said, and caught her arms. His gaze searched the length of her in the dim light. Tears stained her cheeks. Her eyes were wide with fright.
“What happened?” he demanded.
Amanda jerked her arms out of his grasp. “Nothing happened. Except that you nearly scared me to death.”
“You’re all right?” he asked, his gaze still searching her.
“I’m fine.”
Jason frowned. “Then why are you crying?”
“Because I feel like it,” Amanda told him, and swiped at her tears with the back of her hands.
“Oh.” Jason looked closer at her. “You’re sure nobody did anything to hurt you?”
“No.”
“Or said anything?”
“No.”
Jason rose from his knees and stared down at her. Towering above her she looked small and weak. He couldn’t help but wonder if he was responsible for her tears. The idea didn’t make him feel so good.
With a sigh, Jason sat down on the wooden step beside her and pulled his handkerchief from his hip pocket.
“I don’t usually allow crying in my lumber camp,” he said softly.
“Then I guess we’re even,” Amanda said, “because I don’t usually cry.”
She took the handkerchief from him and wiped her eyes, sniffed, crossed her arms in front of her and scooted to the right, far enough away to ensure they didn’t touch.
In the dim light Jason watched her, feeling the pull to move with her, to get close enough that they did touch. He sat still, though.
Jason turned sideways on the step facing Amanda. “It’s different here. Not like the city. People are different. They have to be tough to survive this place.”
She jerked her chin. “Thank you very much for making me feel even worse about coming here.”
“I didn’t mean it like that,” Jason said. “You’r
e from the city. You can’t help what you’re like.”
“Mr. Kruger, you don’t know me well enough to determine what I’m like,” Amanda said, then sniffed and wiped her nose with his handkerchief.
Jason gazed at her for a moment. Even with her cheeks still damp with tears, she held her nose in the air, her chin up. Lord, she was a stubborn woman. He knew that much about her.
A few minutes passed with only the sounds of the forest breaking the silence.
“It’s pretty up here in winter,” Jason said and nodded toward the trees. “Snow blankets the ground, and icicles hang from every branch of every tree. And in the spring the wildflowers bloom.”
“I didn’t think you noticed things like that,” Amanda said, wiping away her last tear.
Jason shrugged his wide shoulders. “Not much to do up here after work but look at the scenery.”
Amanda smiled and felt herself relax a little. “You like it here, don’t you?”
“Yep. I do,” Jason said, gazing off into the woods.
“It suits you,” Amanda agreed.
He turned back to her. “You like your job, too.”
Amanda nodded. “Yes, very much.”
“How come you’re always hunting down husbands for other women, but never found one for yourself?”
Amanda shrugged uneasily. “Well…”
“Don’t you like the idea of being married?” Jason asked.
“I have no objection to it.”
Jason leaned a little closer. “Then is there something about marriage that you do object to?”
A warmth spun between them, pulling Amanda closer to Jason. She knew what he meant, what he was asking about. And she should have been insulted, but wasn’t. Still, she knew better than to answer his question.
“I started my business because I like to see people happily married,” Amanda said. “Like your brother, for instance.”
“Ethan?” Jason frowned. “What are you talking about?”
“He’s in love with Meg.”
“What? No, he’s not.” Jason shook his head, then paused and turned back to Amanda. “Do you think he is?”
Amanda rolled her eyes. “You mean you never noticed?”
Jason shrugged helplessly.