by Judith Stacy
He’d asked her before why she hadn’t found herself a husband, especially when she had so many to choose from. She’d never answered him.
The more he thought about it the more he considered that Amanda was being deliberately evasive on the subject. Jason couldn’t help but wonder why.
But every logical thought went right out of his head when the door to his office opened and Amanda hurried inside with a gust of wind. She closed it quickly behind her. Breathlessly, she looked around, spotted Jason behind his desk, and smiled.
“Good morning,” she said.
It wasn’t a good morning. It was one of the worst days possible to be on a mountain at a lumber camp. But Jason smiled back anyway and rose from his chair.
A light mist of rain moistened her face. Her cheeks flushed pink and her breath came a little quicker than usual. She wore a green dress and looked bright and cheerful on this dreary morning. He’d never seen her so delightfully disheveled.
He helped her take off her cloak and hung it on the peg by the door alongside his jacket. Amanda pulled off her scarf and turned away quickly.
“Gracious, that wind,” she said, heading for the washstand in the back corner.
Jason draped her scarf over her cloak, then stopped still in the middle of the floor.
Standing before the little mirror over the washstand Amanda tucked an errant strand of hair back in place, then pinned it. She studied her reflection, turning her head left, then right. Then, dissatisfied, she pulled the pins from her hair.
All of them. One after another, Amanda plucked out pins, sending waves of her hair curling over her shoulders and down her back.
Thick hair. Dark hair, with a hint of red he hadn’t noticed before. Couldn’t notice with it all pinned so carefully, so neatly, atop her head.
Jason stayed where he was, silent, unmoving, not wanting to shatter this private moment with Amanda. A decent woman never wore her hair down in public. A man never saw a woman’s hair on her shoulders unless they were married…or as good as married.
Just why Amanda showed this trust in him he didn’t know. He didn’t deserve it. Now, when all he could think of was how he wanted to thread her hair through his fingers. How he wanted to bury his nose in it and smell it. How he wanted to see it fanned out across a white linen pillow.
While he watched, she produced a comb from her pocket and twisted her hair into place again. Efficiently, she pinned it, tucking every last strand where it belonged.
Jason pressed his lips together to keep from groaning. What he’d give to pull those pins from her hair himself. To watch that beautiful, shiny hair of hers fall—
“Did I miss something?” she asked.
“Huh?” Jason asked dumbly, then realized that she’d turned away from the mirror and was staring at him as he stared at her.
“Did I miss a strand?” she asked, turning and touching her hand to the back of her head.
Jason savored the moment as she stood still just for him. His gaze traveled down the long line of her back, to her waist, her hips, her bustle, to the hem of her skirt and the little glimpse of her ankles he got as her dress swirled around her. He held in another moan and lifted his gaze to her head.
Two little locks of hair curled at her nape, but Jason didn’t tell her. He liked seeing them there. Soft strands of hair, begging him to coil his fingers around them.
Amanda looked back over her shoulders, her brows raised, waiting for his answer.
“Fine,” he murmured. “It’s fine.”
Jason cleared his throat and forced himself to head for his desk.
“Are those the plans for the dormitory?” she asked.
He sat down, only to find her leaning over his shoulder, studying the plans laid out on his desk. He picked them up to keep his hands busy, and off of her.
“I’m just about finished with them,” he said.
“Can I see?”
He glanced up at her again and knew he was making a mistake. “Sure.”
Amanda circled the desk and pulled a chair up to the opposite side. Jason pushed everything off to the right and spread out the plans between them.
When he’d drawn them up using the simple diagram Amanda had presented him with, he’d put no more thought into them than to include the things she’d asked for. Now, somehow, having her approve of his work meant the world to him.
They discussed the plans, each holding a pencil, pointing, asking questions, tossing out ideas. Amanda had a few more suggestions, but generally, she was pleased with what he’d done. And he was pleased at having her so close.
Finally, when they’d both agreed on every aspect of the dormitory, Jason sat back and rubbed his forehead.
“I can’t wait until this rain stops so we can get started,” Amanda said, rising from her chair. “Do you think it will rain long?”
Jason squeezed his eyes shut for a minute. “Probably a day, the way the wind is blowing.”
“Are you all right?” Amanda asked.
He glanced up and grimaced. “Got a little ache in my head, that’s all.”
“Women on your mountain,” Amanda said softly. “We really are a pain for you, aren’t we?”
Jason shrugged. “I’ve gotten used to the idea. And…it’s all right.”
She smiled. “Really? Do you really mean that?”
“Yep,” Jason said. “I really do.”
Amanda headed for the washstand. “Let me do something about your head.”
“No, it’s all right,” Jason said, waving away her attention.
“Having women on your mountain may not be a pain, but it’s my fault that your head is hurting,” Amanda insisted, moving around the office. “My fault for keeping you hard at work over those plans.”
He’d gotten a headache from the tension and pressure building up in his body. It had to go somewhere. But he couldn’t tell her that.
“Sit back,” Amanda said.
“No, look—”
“Oh, you men,” she said, gazing down at him. “You’re so stubborn about this sort of thing. Now, sit back and close your eyes.”
Well, why not? He’d wanted her to be closer. Now was his chance.
Jason closed his eyes and laid his head back. He felt her wedge her folded scarf under his neck so he rested comfortably on the back of his chair. A cool cloth covered his forehead. Her fingertips touched his temples.
Jason nearly came up out of the chair.
“Relax,” she whispered at his ear.
Relax? How the hell was he supposed to relax with her so close he could smell her? When her soft fingers were twirling little circles at his temples? When every nerve ending in his whole body was standing on end? When he wanted her so badly he ached for her?
Gulping, Jason tried to relax. He tried to tune out the needs of his body. He tried to ignore every instinct he’d ever had.
Impossible.
Jason bolted from the chair.
“Didn’t that help?” Amanda asked, holding the damp cloth she’d caught as it fell from his forehead.
He pulled it from her fingers and tossed it across the office. “Amanda….”
The look in his eyes warned her. The heat he gave off told her. His stance, drawing closer and closer, confirmed it.
But Amanda didn’t back away.
She’d been aware of the force that pulled them together—whatever it was—for days. She was helpless against it. Against him. Against herself.
Jason slid both arms around her and brought his mouth down over hers. Amanda’s knees wobbled. A little mewl hummed in her throat. She threw her arms around his neck and angled her head back. Jason devoured her mouth with his.
A strange inner fire drove her. Amanda curled her fist into the hair at the back of his head. He kissed her harder. She leaned into him until their bodies touched. Her breasts brushed his chest. Her thighs rubbed his. She leaned closer until she felt his—
Amanda gasped. Jason groaned. He kissed a hot trail down her jaw, fum
bled with the bow and fasteners at her throat, opened them, and laid his lips against her flesh.
Awkwardly, she pulled open the buttons on his shirt and long johns and laid her palms on his chest. A new, different sort of desire rushed through her. She raked her fingers through the dark swirls of hair on his chest. It was short, coarse…magnificent. Hard muscles lay beneath it. Amanda pushed her fingers deeper inside his shirt and touched his nipple. Jason groaned.
One by one she felt the buttons on her dress open—and she didn’t care. She wanted this. She wanted this with Jason.
His long, hot fingers closed over her breast. His thumb caressed her nipple. Amanda moaned his name. His mouth covered hers again.
Heat sealed them together, their mouths, their bodies. Frantic, their hands explored. Amanda felt dizzy in his arms, yet driven to keep going. Clinging to Jason, she coiled her leg around his and pressed herself against him.
A harsh, ragged moan tore from Jason’s throat. He lifted his head from the sweet valley of her breasts, breathing heavily.
“We shouldn’t be doing this,” he rasped.
“I know.”
“We have to stop.”
“I know.”
They gazed at each other, their faces inches apart, their bodies full against each other.
“We have to stop,” Jason said again.
“I know.” Amanda caught a fistful of his hair. “Just…just once more.”
He kissed her. Hard and wet and wild. He pressed against her until she bumped his desk, then leaned her backward, sealing her against him with his powerful arms.
Then he let go. Amanda plopped down on the desktop, crushing the dormitory plans beneath her, gazing up at him with passion-blurred eyes. He gazed back, looking just as dazed. Both their chests heaved. Their breathing was quick and their cheeks flushed.
Slowly, Jason straightened, putting distance between them but never taking his eyes off her.
“Somebody might walk in,” he said, his voice a hoarse whisper.
A few seconds passed before the haze of passion lifted and Amanda realized what Jason was saying. She glanced back at the door recognizing how vulnerable—and how foolish—she’d been.
Still, she wasn’t embarrassed. Or sorry.
“You’d better go,” Jason told her, and took a step back.
Amanda got off the desk and saw his gaze follow her. She glanced down. Her blouse was unbuttoned, exposing the swell of her breasts. But instead of pulling the fabric closed, her gaze went to his chest, visible through his open shirt.
Desire arced between them again. Their gazes met. But Jason backed away.
He couldn’t stop watching her though as she buttoned her blouse and straightened her clothes, and his body burned for her. She grabbed her cloak and scarf and opened the door. She looked back, then left.
The only thing that kept him from going after her was knowing what would happen if he did. And fearing what that meant.
If word got out—and it would—she’d be ruined.
And he’d have ruined her.
Amanda crawled into bed that night and pulled the coverlet over her, exhausted. She didn’t even think about the strange sounds in the forest around her that made her nervous, made her imagine all sorts of things were lurking in the trees surrounding her cabin. All she could think of was Jason.
He’d occupied her thoughts all day. He’d warmed her stomach, made her heart beat faster, caused her to quiver and feel dizzy. She’d worked herself silly today cleaning her cabin, cooking, making lists, planning, but Jason hadn’t been far from her thoughts.
She didn’t know why she’d done the things she’d done with him in his office this morning. Scandalous things. Things she’d never imagined doing before.
Things that would have devastated her reputation if Jason hadn’t come to his senses.
Good thing that he had, Amanda decided, staring into the darkness of her little cabin, because this morning in his office, in his arms, she’d had not one bit of sense. Something had driven her to do those things. Something Jason had awakened in her.
Amanda rolled over and fluffed her pillow. She’d awakened something in Jason, too. Something beyond the passionate fever pitch they’d experienced this morning.
He’d come to accept women on his mountain. He wasn’t just tolerating them, or putting up with them, he was actually accepting them. Acknowledging that the women had a place there, and it was all right with him. That pleased her.
Amanda never blamed Jason for the way he felt about women. He’d told her about his mother, her domineering ways, how she ran the family, how his father had done nothing to stop her, and the hardships she’d placed on Jason and his brothers and sisters.
Somehow, he’d come to terms with that now. He’d forgiven and forgotten. Accepting her brides on his mountain proved it.
Amanda smiled into the darkness. Had she been responsible for his change? Jason was a stubborn, determined man. A man didn’t own a mountain and run a lumber camp without those qualities. She wouldn’t kid herself into believing she was solely responsible for his change of heart. But maybe, just maybe, she’d had a little something to do with it.
But whatever the cause, it pleased Amanda. He trusted her. He’d accepted her into his life. He’d told her his secrets, he’d given her a chance, and he’d come around. Things had gotten better between them. So much better, in fact, that they’d nearly torn each other’s clothes off this morning.
Amanda pressed her lips together. Jason trusted her. With his past, with his future.
Where would that lead?
Chapter Seventeen
At breakfast the next morning, an argument broke out between three loggers who wanted to assist Amanda into her chair. This surprised her, given that Jason wasn’t at the table, glaring at the men, barking out orders on their conduct.
“Gentlemen, thank you,” Amanda said, raising her voice over that of the three men. “I’m so pleased that you’ve all remembered your manners.”
The three men stared at each other, and two of them backed off. The third man helped Amanda into her chair, then they all sat down on the benches that surrounded their large table.
“We heard about what happened down in Beaumont, Miss Pierce,” Henry Jasper said after they’d filled their plates. “Did you really dunk that miner in the horse trough?”
Amanda almost blushed. She’d feared this story would get around the lumber camp and would have preferred to keep it quiet. It wasn’t the kind of story that would do her image as a genteel lady any good. How could she ask the loggers to act like gentlemen if she couldn’t conduct herself as a lady?
“Yes, Henry,” Amanda said. “It’s true.”
“Well, hot damn!” Bill Braddock pounded his fist on the table and a round of hoots and yells rose from the men.
“Good for you, Miss Pierce,” Henry said, grinning.
“Don’t take nothing off them miners,” another man called out. “Show ’em what it means to work the high timber.”
The men cheered and clattered their silverware on the tabletop.
Amanda stared, forcing her lips together to keep her mouth from sagging open in amazement. The loggers were actually pleased by what she’d done.
“’Course now, Miss Pierce,” Henry said, “we’re sure you dunked that fella in the most ladylike way possible.”
Another chorus of agreement circulated around the table.
Amanda couldn’t help grinning. “Thank you, Henry.”
“You want to tell us more about them manners we’re supposed to be learning?” Bill asked. He waved his fork around the table. “Some of these jackasses—excuse me, ma’am—some of these gentlemen don’t seem to remember.”
A big smile spread over Amanda’s face. “Of course.”
“Then we want to hear all about what happened in Beaumont,” Henry said. “Straight from you, ma’am.”
“Well, certainly,” Amanda said, and proceeded with their manners lesson for the mo
rning.
Afterward, the prospective husbands crowded close as she told them what had happened in Beaumont. The men at the adjoining tables fell silent, as well, listening. She tried to downplay the incident, but the men wouldn’t hear of it. Some of the details they made her tell twice. By the time the loggers left the cookhouse Amanda felt a closeness with the men, as if a new respect and camaraderie now bound them all together.
“You’re going to have every man on the mountain after you, if you keep telling that story.”
Amanda turned and found Jason standing behind her. She hadn’t realized he’d been there, listening.
When he hadn’t been present at the table of prospective husbands this morning, Amanda thought he wasn’t in the cookhouse at all. She wondered why he hadn’t eaten with them. Now, seeing him, she knew why.
The passion they’d shared in his office yesterday morning showed on his face. She knew it was displayed on hers as well, evidenced by the way her heart quickened and her knees trembled. Anyone seeing them together would have seen it immediately. Jason wouldn’t want his men knowing his feelings for her. And really, Amanda didn’t want that either.
He’d been wise to stay away from her. Still, she’d missed him. And she was glad to see him now.
“I’d think they’d be put off that I’d acted so brazenly,” Amanda said, watching the last man disappear out the door.
Jason came forward, shaking his head. “It’s a rough life up here on the mountain. A man prizes a woman who can take care of herself.”
She wanted to ask Jason if he included himself among that type of man, but didn’t. She thought it better to get on with business.
“Would it be all right if I used the cookhouse for a while this afternoon?” Amanda asked. “I thought it would be a good idea to have a meeting with all the women on the mountain, try and get them involved with the brides’ arrival.”
The idea had come to her last night during one of the hours she’d lain awake. She didn’t want the women already living here to feel threatened by the newly arrived brides. The last thing she needed was discontent on the mountain among the women.
Jason nodded toward the kitchen. “I’ll tell the cook. You won’t have much time.”