by Jean Carroll
This went on the same way all day. The bidding on the gray that Sean liked went a little higher than they wanted, but they got him. There were several breaks for food and drinks. The guys got up to go get drinks, asking Katie and Meg if they wanted anything. They said tea and the men left.
Immediately Katie turned to Meg and asked, “What happened? When did you do the test?”
“Last night after he fell asleep. I couldn’t believe it was positive. I didn’t get much sleep thinking about it.”
“When are you going to tell him?”
“After the sale is over. I guess tonight after dinner. I’m really nervous about it. I have no idea how he’s going to react. I feel irritable and cranky today too. I’m ready to jump out of my skin. He knows something is wrong, but doesn’t know what. He wanted me to stay in bed and rest but I didn’t want to miss this. I’m so strangely tired.”
Sean and Blackie came back in a few more minutes and gave them their tea. Sean sat down but Blackie leaned against the railing so he could talk to them.
“I’m happy with how we’ve done so far. What do you think, Sean?” he asked sipping his coffee. She noticed he was standing like he always did with all his weight on his left leg with the right one relaxed. She knew it was an unconscious habit because of his hip, but it bothered her.
“Yes, we got some bargains but the gray was a little pricey,” Sean answered.
“That’s okay. He’ll probably wind up being worth it,” Blackie said. “The dressage horses are next,” he said smiling at her and then frowned.
“Meg, you look pale again, are you okay?”
“Yes, I’m fine. I’m just tired.” He leaned forward and kissed her very gently, staring closely in her eyes.
“I don’t want you getting sick. You’d tell me if anything was wrong, wouldn’t you?”
“Uh ... of course, Blackie.”
She shot a quick glance at Katie and he caught the look. He looked at Katie and then back at Meg, considering her for a minute but didn’t ask any questions.
“I love you, Meg,” he said and kissed her again.
“I love you too,” she said and smiled up at him. He gave Katie another appraising look and then sat down and started talking to Sean. Katie nudged her and rolled her eyes.
They settled in to wait for the sale of the two dressage horses.
“I was thinking. Let’s have all of them shipped to Dad’s stable. That way we’ll have more time to decide on them when we’re there. Dad can keep two; just don’t let him get his hands on the gray. Then we’ll have the rest shipped home.”
“That sounds like a grand idea. How much have we spent so far?”
“Approximately €120,000. That’s kind of in the ballpark of what I thought we’d spend. These two coming up might be more expensive. Let’s go out and celebrate tonight. What do you think, ladies?”
“I’m in,” Katie said.
“What about you, Meg? Do you feel up to going out?” He asked her.
“Sure, honey, we deserve to celebrate after our successful horse buying day,” she said, trying to sound upbeat.
“That’s my girl. I’ll think of someplace nice. Oh, Meg, here’s your mare,” he said as they led her into the ring. The auctioneer started her bidding high. Blackie whistled softly and waited to see if the auctioneer would come down. Someone else made the first bid and Blackie said, “Shit,” under his breath. He started bidding and the price went up quick.
“Blackie, that’s too much money.”
“Shut up, Meg,” he snapped at her. “That fucker better stop bidding soon.”
Finally, Blackie was the successful bidder, but the mare cost him €20,000. He looked at Sean and shook his head. She thought better of saying anything more about the cost. She didn’t feel up to fighting with him. He got the gelding he wanted for €15,000. He stretched and yawned.
“I have to go down and pay the man. Sean, do you want to take care of the shipping arrangements? Why don’t you girls wait for us out front? I think there are some benches out there. Is that okay?”
“Yes, do you want anything more to drink?” Meg asked him.
“I need coffee. How about you, Sean?”
They went off to do their thing and Katie and Meg got drinks and went out to wait. It was a beautiful evening but she could feel a foul mood creeping into her brain.
“You know it’s been a long, tedious day and I’d rather go back to the hotel and lie down. I understand why he wants to celebrate but I’m not in the mood.”
“Maybe a drink and some food will help you relax. You’re probably stressed thinking about telling him.”
“I guess, but if he tells me to shut up again, he’s going to have a fight on his hands.”
“Oh boy, you are in a cranky mood!”
“Thanks, Katie; cut me some slack here. I have a feeling tonight is not going to turn out
well. What do I do if he says he can’t be tied down with a kid?”
“Somehow I doubt he’s going to say that, Meg. Calm down. Oh, here they come. Be cool,” Katie said.
“Hi, you two. Ah, caffeine!” Black said, taking the cup from Katie and sipping the hot brew.
“We’re all paid and Sean made the shipping plans, so we’re done here. It’s five o’clock, do we want to go now and get dinner?”
“Let’s go now, I’m hungry and we can take a nice long leisurely time to celebrate,” Sean said.
“Is that okay with you, sweetie,” Blackie said, putting his arms around her.
“Yes, that’s fine,” she said with as much enthusiasm as she could muster. He ran his fingers down the side of her face.
“You’re worrying me. Are you okay?” he asked for the millionth time.
“Yes, jeez,” she snapped at him.
He put his hands up in a defensive gesture and rolled his eyes at Sean.
“I guess that’s a big yes,” he said a little too sarcastically to suit her and she gave him a look. He smiled and took her hand to go to the car.
He drove to a very pricey restaurant in Dublin where they were seated at a round table and waited for service.
A gorgeous, redheaded waitress came and handed out menus. Of course she honed in on Blackie like radar.
“How are you folks this evening,” she said giving him a seductive smile. He flashed a big smile which instantly pissed Meg off.
“We’re just fine,” he said.
“Yes, you are and what’s your name, luv?” she asked in a sugary voice.
“Blackie, it’s a nick name.”
“Mine’s Sherrie.”
“Ah, like the wine,” he said, like an idiot. Meg was getting ready to go over and smack that stupid smile off his face.
“Sure and I’m great after dinner, too.” she said and he choked on his water.
“I’ll be back and get drink orders in a minute,” she said walking away, switching her ass. He watched her walk away.
“Did she actually just say that?” he asked Sean, still watching her butt.
“Yes, she did, sport,” Sean said, frowning at him.
“Let’s see what’s on the menu,” Blackie said, opening his.
“Yes, if you can take your eyes off her ass for a second,” Meg said with more sarcasm than she had intended.
He laughed. “Honey, come on, she’s just goofing around,” he said innocently.
“Oh and what were you supposed to be doing?”
He looked at Meg a little puzzled. “I’m not doing anything.” He went back to his menu.
The lovely Sherrie came bouncing back and asked Blackie what he wanted to drink, ignoring the rest of us.
“What do you have on draft?”
“Killian’s, Smithwick’s, Beck, Harp, Budweiser, Amstel Lite, Guinness.”
“I’ll have a Killian’s.”
She looked at Sean and he ordered the same, Katie, white wine and Meg got a Coke.
“I’ll be right back, luv,” and switched herself toward the bar.
> Blackie burst out laughing and Sean snickered.
“What’s so funny?” Meg said angrily.
“The waitress, she’s funny,” he said.
“I don’t see anyone laughing but you. You must be enjoying it,” she said getting more pissed by the minute.
“Oh, Meg, come on, that’s pretty funny.”
She just gave him a dirty look. He puffed out a big sigh and went back to his menu.
Sherrie brought the drinks and then said she’d take their food orders. She leaned over in front of Blackie so he could get a super look at her impressive cleavage and asked, “What would you like, Blackie?”
His eyes flickered up to her chest and he choked again. “Uh ... I’ll have the steak, medium with mashed potatoes and a salad.” He was biting his lip as she took their orders. When she left he started laughing.
“Jesus, Sean, do you believe her?”
“No, I don’t,” Sean said sternly.
“If you’d stop flirting with her, maybe she’d stop,” Meg snapped.
“Meg, I’m not flirting with her, come on,” he said, still smiling.
“Like hell, you’re not. Did you get a good look at her tits?” Meg said, raising her voice.
“Honey, calm down, I’m not flirting; I’m making fun of her,” he said, not smiling now.
She turned away and he just stared at her with a puzzled expression on his face. Neither of them said anything.
“Take it easy, this is turning into a bad situation,” Sean whispered to him.
“Damnit, she knows better,” Blackie said.
Meg didn’t say anything. Now Sherrie came over with their food. Blackie just kept his head down.
“Blackie, do you speak Gaelic?” she asked laughing.
“I do, yes,” he said warily.
Then she said something to him in Gaelic and laughed.
“Jesus!” Blackie said and threw his napkin down.
She swished her butt back into the kitchen looking back to see his reaction.
“Oh, shit,” Sean said.
“What did she say to you,” Meg yelled, She was livid. She was ready to scratch her eyes out.
“It doesn’t matter, Meg, she’s ridiculous.”
“Do I always have to worry about you and other women?”
“What? When have I ever given you a reason to think I was after some other woman?” He said with narrowed eyes and gritted teeth.
“Hey, calm down you two, we’re supposed to be celebrating.
“Fuck that, this is stupid. All I did was answer her,” Blackie said louder.
“Oh, sure. ‘like the wine’, very cute,” she said with a snort.
“Listen, little girl, you’re starting to piss me off.”
“I’m not a little girl,” she yelled.
“You’re acting like one. What in God’s name would make you think I’d be interested in her? She’s ludicrous; she’s a slut!” he said.
“I thought that’s what you liked.” She said nastily and was instantly sorry. He looked like she slapped him in the face.
“Blackie, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that. I’m angry and jealous. I’m sorry,” and she started to cry.
He stared at her, still angry but now confused too.
“Meg, what the hell is the matter with you? Why don’t you trust me? We’ve been together for over six months. I thought by now you’d know I don’t want anyone else. I love you,” he said, frowning.
“I love you too,” she said, sniffling.
“I think I know what’s going on. You’re uncomfortable living with me. We need to be married, and then maybe you’ll trust me. I’ve waited too long to ask you,” he said and she burst into tears.
“Mary, Mother of God! Meg, what the hell is wrong with you,” he yelled at her and she yelled back.
“I’m pregnant!” and sobbed harder.
“Oh, Christ!” Sean said.
Blackie just sat there with his mouth open.
“You’re what?” He said, his heart thumping in his chest.
“You heard me,” she said through sobs.
“When were you going to tell me?”
“I’m telling you now.”
“How long have you known?”
“Since last night,” she said crying harder.
“I can’t do this here. Sean, pay that stupid bitch. We’re going back to the hotel. I’ll call you,” Blackie said, stood up, went around the table and took her hand.
“Come on, Meg,” he said gently.
They walked out and grabbed a cab. Neither of them said anything. They entered their room at the hotel, closed the door and Blackie leaned against it, staring at her.
“Blackie, I didn’t do this on purpose. I’ve been wearing the patch and using it correctly. I don’t know what happened,” she said rapid fire and started sobbing again. Then she couldn’t breathe and started gasping for air.
Suddenly she felt his arms around her tight and his mouth against her temple.
“Meg, shhh, calm down, honey. It’s okay. It’s going to be okay. Shh, calm down,” he crooned to her gently.
“I’m sorry,” she got out between sobs.
“For what?” he said stroking her hair.
“I guess I messed up somehow with the birth control.”
“Why didn’t you wake me up and tell me last night?”
“I didn’t want to ruin the sale for you.”
“Meg, the sale isn’t important. Nothing is more important to me than you.”
“If you don’t want to be tied down with me and a child, I’ll understand,” she said, crying harder again. He held her out and looked at her.
“What are you talking about? I’m so happy about this. I can’t believe it. I’m kind of shocked but very happy. How would this tie me down? You’re the one who’s going to be carrying a baby around for nine months. Well, now we really need to get married.”
“No, I don’t want you to marry me because I’m pregnant. That’s ridiculous.”
“I don’t want to marry you because you’re pregnant. I want to because I love you. That’s what I said at the table. I’ve just been enjoying our relationship so much, I wasn’t thinking about you. That you might be uncomfortable living with me without being married. Forgive me. I just get so involved; I don’t always see the big picture.”
“I didn’t know how you would react. I was worried.”
“Why would you be worried, Meg? I can’t tell you enough how much I love you. When I say that, I mean it with all my heart. I’ve never said it to another woman, ever. Do you really think I wouldn’t want our baby? This is my fault for being so stupid and waiting too long to ask you to marry me. Will you marry me?”
“Yes ... I love you so much. You’re so wonderful to me.” She hugged him and he kissed her with so much emotion.
I must be dreaming. I can’t believe he’s accepting this so well. I can’t believe he just asked me to marry him.
“Now we really have something to celebrate,” he said smiling at her. “Let’s call Sean and Katie to come over.”
“Okay.”
He called Sean and then turned and hugged her. “Meg, we’re going to have a baby, how wonderful!”
Sean knocked and Blackie yelled, “Come in” without letting go of her. They walked in and Blackie turned to them and said,
“I guess you heard that we’re having a baby. Sean, you’re going to be an uncle.”
“What can I say? I guess congratulations are in order. What are you guys going to do? Meg doesn’t seem too happy about it.” Sean said.
“I’m happy about it, I’m just in shock. I wasn’t sure how he was going to react.” She said, trying to compose herself. Blackie still had his arms around her.
“What about you, man? Are you ready for this? Not to bring up a sore subject but you’re doing good working with Dr. Wahlman. Is this stress going to set you off? Are you going to start drinking again? I love the idea of you going down in a blaze of diapers, but are you st
able enough for this?” Sean said seriously.
Blackie just looked at him for a few minutes then took a deep breath.
“A lot of good questions, Sean. Let’s all sit down. I don’t know how I’m going to handle it. But I do know that I have to take care of Meg. She’s not going to do this by herself. I have to be strong for her and the baby.”
“I told you, you don’t have to marry me. I could do this by myself.” She said sticking out her chin.
“What, you want to be an unwed mother? Not carrying my child you’re not! I should have married you a long time ago.”
“Why do you always think you should tell me what to do? Don’t you realize I can think for myself?”
“Because I’m the man and it’s my responsibility to take care of you. I’m sorry, Meg, but I’m old-fashioned. I should have known you were uncomfortable living together.” Blackie said.
“I never said I was uncomfortable living with you. Where did you come up with that? I think you’re the one who’s uncomfortable, especially with this situation now.” She said.
“Damn right I am. I didn’t want us to have kids before we got married.” He said, raising his voice.
“When the hell did marriage ever come up?” She asked. “You never mentioned it before now.”
“Don’t you want to marry me? I thought you loved me,” he said, slumping his shoulders.
“Of course I love you, you know that, Blackie.”
“Blackie, don’t be stupid. Have you ever actually asked her to marry you? You should have taken care of business before this happened,” Sean said.
“You’re right Sean, it’s my dumb fault. I thought I said that already. Anyway, I just asked her to marry me and she said yes, so that’s it.”
“Are we going to Mom and Dad’s from here?” Sean asked.
“Bollocks! I forgot. I can look forward to a six hour lecture about this one,” Blackie said.
“Do you have to tell them?” Katie said.
“Oh, my mother will know, believe me, the woman’s psychic.”
“Come on, how’s she going to know? We don’t have to tell anyone yet.”