Two Hard

by Amy Brent

  They both went to sleep snuggled against each other, making love slowly before she got up to go to the hotel to head home on a plane. Everything was going well apart from the secret that they were keeping and it worried her, making her restless in her seat beside Tanner. “You look a little rough.” He told her, causing her to scowl in his direction.

  “I’m just tired and kind of sick, I think. Too much traveling.” Holly rested her head back on the seat and closed her eyes lazily, feeling thirsty.

  “Rest up this week while we’re home. This isn’t your style, Holly.” Tanner teased her as she smiled wanly.

  “Don’t I know it?”

  They got home and she went home to sleep, still feeling unsettled a week later. Holly was doing everything in her power to get better but it seemed to drag on just enough to wear her down even as she felt hungry all of the time. She ate healthier food than usual and ended up falling asleep on Aaron faster than he was used to, finally suggesting she see a doctor.

  Just as she was picking up the phone to make an appointment as she eyed the calendar for a good day, her heart dropped into her stomach, settling like a heavy lump. Holly wasn’t the most regular girl in the world, but it had been about six weeks since her last period. She’d been so busy that she hadn’t thought about it. Holly stared at the dates, thinking that there was no way she could be pregnant. She was great about taking her pills and had not been on any kind of medication to alter their effect.

  Shit. She grabbed her purse and walked out of the apartment in her worn jeans and a sweater to the corner store, glancing around for any familiar faces. Holly wasn’t a celebrity by any means, but she’d gotten to know a few people working with the team. She didn’t want to explain this or have it get back to Aaron, since it had to be her mind running on overtime. Holly let out a small sigh of relief and grabbed a few choices from the aisle, exiting it as she dropped the test kits into a basket and ducking her head. She chose self-checkout to stay discreet, paying and bagging everything as fast as possible before heading to the quiet apartment to suffer through this alone.

  Holly locked the door behind her and drank a whole glass of water before she looked over her choices in pregnancy tests. She felt sick thinking about this but she picked the one that seemed easiest and headed into the bathroom to do her thing. The worst part was going to be waiting and she walked back out into the living room to grab the other tests and drop them onto her bed as she paced back and forth.

  Holly was young and she was sleeping with her boss, which was the worst situation to have this happen to her…to them. This kind of news could tank Aaron’s reputation and bring scandal to the team all over again while she could apply elsewhere and disappear quietly from his life. It was the only answer if that test did come up positive. He couldn’t even make this a real relationship with her yet. How would he handle becoming a father from some fling that he was having?

  After the given time, Holly walked back into the bathroom and sat on the cold toilet before she picked up her future. She took a deep breath and stared at the two lines that would forever change her life, staring at them as tears slid down her cheeks. She knew that anything with Aaron was over to save his position in the world that he loved, leaving Holly to decide where to go from there. She could end it herself and pretend that nothing had happened, continuing to work but knowing deep inside that she could never face Aaron with that kind of knowledge inside of her head. Holly didn’t even think she could consider that by herself. She might have to get another position and move away to do this on her own, or find a way to make him think it was somebody else’s baby.

  Any one of those choices broke her heart as she cried for the loss of the man that had made her trust again, curling her knees against her body as she sat against the wall. Aaron had become everything to her, so much so that she couldn’t hurt him and his job with this news. He’d gotten too far.

  ****to be continued as PART 3****

  PART 3

  CHAPTER ONE

  Aaron left the restaurant with a grin on his face, pleased to have scored another sponsor for the team. Since their games had been all wins and things were looking great, they were starting to step forward.

  At least that was working in his life. It wouldn’t leave his mind that he hadn’t seen Holly in a week though it had been a busy one for all of them. Three away games, practices and some meetings on his end as well. She had a few small injuries with the team that she was working out but he hadn’t really even talked to her. Aaron hated to admit it, but he missed her. He missed everything about her, pushing away the feelings that he knew were cemented within him even as he did it. It made him wonder too much about their future. He stopped at the curb on the way back to his apartment, slipping his phone from his pocket and glancing down at it.

  Nothing from Holly. He decided to take a chance and wrote a text about the lunch as well as asking to see her. The light changed and he strode forward, making it to his house in twenty minutes without any response. He took the elevator up, feeling restless with his free afternoon as he changed into workout clothes and debated which gym to head to. He didn’t feel like being home and the silence from his phone was eating away at him. Aaron decided on the team one and left his place again to walk over, using his key to get inside and into the huge room, happy to see a few players doing their thing. No redhead though, making him feel bitter inside.

  Aaron had always enjoyed an intense workout when he had things on his mind, particularly after his depression. He had found himself doing it more and more these days, missing the daily exercise of the game. Aaron knew that he had replaced it with Holly, making love with her every chance he got. He hardened at the memories of it, glancing around as he set his bag down against the wall. There was some hard rock playing over the speakers as everybody greeted him in cheerful moods, feeling the positive spirit of the team fill the room. He loved it.

  Holly was on her computer when her phone chimed, researching everything that she could about a healthy pregnancy. She looked sadly at the screen, seeing a text from Aaron that would go ignored. She didn’t know what to say, though the team had been so busy that it hadn’t been an issue yet anyway.

  She missed him. She missed talking with him, cuddling with him and her newly awakened hormones missed sex with him when she wasn’t feeling sick. Holly had no idea how she was going to handle that knowing fully well that she couldn’t imagine being with anybody but Aaron. She loved him but she needed to protect him. She returned to the page about nutrition that she had pulled up, making a grocery list as she looked over it. All of her energy was going into this baby and work, something she was trying to tell herself was a healthy thing. She heard the front door open and glanced over to see her roommate walk in with a bag from a nearby store. “Hi Lisa. Shopping again?”

  “Just on the way home from meeting with a client.” Lisa replied walking over to Holly with worry etched on her pretty face. Holly had been honest with her about everything going on and Lisa had even met Aaron once at the apartment when they were closer to it than his, seeing how happy her friend was in the smile on her face. “I saw Aaron walking back. He looks unhappy, Hol.”

  “I got a text from him. I need to make up an excuse as to why it’s over.” Her tone was sad and Lisa read the page closely, realizing that there was going to be a lot of good food in their kitchen soon.

  “You could tell him about the baby as well,” Lisa suggested, looking at Holly as she glanced up. “I love that you’re into the health aspect of this, but all of the physical work isn’t going to help your head. I mean, you are keeping it and he should know too.”

  “He loves hockey, Lisa. He’ll probably step down and he can’t do that. Aaron needs it in his life too much.” Holly told her stubbornly, her hand dropping to her stomach. “This little one is going to have two awesome moms here and my family will love the time that they get too. There will be holidays and all of that fun stuff.”

  There was a lot that Lisa wanted t
o say, but this was new to her friend and she allowed her to keep thinking that was for the moment. She walked into her room to pull out her clothes and hang them up as she pictured Aaron in her mind. She had been jealous seeing Holly with him in a good way, because the man was gorgeous. He’d be snatched up in no time if Holly kept being insistent about not wanting all of this and she’d be really hurt. Lisa was aware that they both said it wasn’t that serious but they were clearly in love when seen together. Not to mention how happy his family would be about the baby.

  The next day at work, Holly stepped into her therapy room as she sipped the orange juice that she seemed to depend on to get her through the day. One of the guys was having some leg pains that she was working on. Every step in this place made her think about Aaron and her body ran with the thoughts as she heated up uncomfortably. She pulled her loose curls up into a ponytail and wiped down the chair that she used quickly before he came in. Holly heard the door open and glanced up to see Walter enter as she forced a smile on her face. “I saw you come in. Shoulder?”

  “Sit down.” He’d pulled it during the last game and she watching him sit down as she took another sip of the organic juice. He was dressed in a tee shirt for a workout and she pressed into his skin with her fingers. “You see Todd about this?” She worked closely with the team medical staff and all of the guys knew that nothing would get by either of them.

  “It’s mild. Just a little muscle pull and it will heal. Don’t even suggest my staying out of the game because it isn’t happening.” Walter told her, making her laugh as she massaged him hard and deep.

  “Such the cocky center you are.” She teased him back comfortable as her stomach rolled, realizing how hungry she was. He did too, chuckling.

  “Did you forget to eat?” Walter teased her and she grimaced as she thought back to how she was throwing up nothing over eating.

  “I was sleeping too late.” Holly glanced at the clock on the wall. “Mike should be here in about fifteen minutes. I can grab something after that.”

  “Want some company?” Walter offered and she accepted easily. Despite his arrogance on the ice, she really liked him as a friend. She finished him up before grabbing a banana from her bag to eat before Mike came inside. Walter stayed in to chat as she pressed against his leg, laughing sadly inside as she realized that she was surrounded by hot guys every day and not tempted by any of them. That was reserved for Aaron. She checked on the intensity of it, choosing to ice it today after she was done with the intense massage. “We’re going to grab some grub at The Diner. Want to join us?” Walter asked Mike, who agreed as she glanced up with a frown on her face. “Is that cool, Holly?”

  “Yeah, of course. I was just thinking about something.” She smiled at them to make it seem like everything was fine even as her head started to hurt as the thoughts invaded her mind.

  An hour later, Mike was ready for the day’s practice and she was starving. They headed out onto the street to walk the short distance to the diner as Holly felt her mood rapidly changing, hating this part of pregnancy. Holly remained quiet knowing that she’d let loose on her roommate a few times in this state before she’d fed herself. It wasn’t pretty.

  It took a few minutes with fans stopping them to get autographs from Walter and she stood back and watched as she sighed softly. They finally made it into the glass doors and she felt eyes on her as she stepped up to the hostess and asked for a table.

  Aaron stood outside and across the street, watching her go inside with two of his teammates. He frowned, not blind to the fact that Holly was getting closer to Walter as time passed. Aaron couldn’t tell her not to spend any time with the players even as he was constantly aware of how beautiful she was and how they might want to get involved with her at levels that she might not be able to handle.

  CHAPTER TWO

  Holly pushed away her plate with a happy sigh, seeing the absence of all of the food that she’d ordered. The guys were done as well, wiping their faces with napkins as Walter observed her with an intent gaze. He offered to pay for all of them as she shook her head and he insisted, laughing as Mike instantly accepted.

  “Fine.” Holly gave in, watching as Walter threw some big bills on the table. The three left with Mike going back to the arena for some light exercise to stretch himself out and Walter left eying Holly as she stared at him. “What? I said thank you.”

  “I’ve just been noticing things the last few weeks. I am a little worried about it.” Walter told her, making her heart race as she wondered what he meant.

  “Meaning what?” Holly pressed, challenging him with her eyes.

  “My little sister is pregnant right now. Lil is about three months along and I am noticing similarities between the two of you here and there. Hell, today you looked just like her going out to eat right now.” Walter said softly as her eyes widened and her face paled. “Are you pregnant?”

  “Oh my God. It’s that obvious?” Holly said before she covered her mouth with her hand.

  “Not to everyone, I’m sure.” Walter assured her, his eyes seeking hers. “Does he know?”

  I…no. It’s complicated. I’m on my own.” Holly admitted, watching him frown as Lisa’s words filled her mind. “I can do this.”

  “I’m not saying that you can’t, but I’d want to know if it was me. I think we’re friends enough for me to say that.” Walter told her firmly, making her shake her head.

  “Well, I think we both know it isn’t.” She told him, looking up and down the street. “I’ll be okay.”

  “I will be here for anything that you need, Holly. Appointments, meals…anything.” Walter told her, watching a tear slide down her cheek as she wished that it was Aaron telling her this and pulling her into his arms. “I don’t want you to be alone.”

  She nodded as she gave him a hug, willing to take what he was offering. It wasn’t the right person and not who she wanted, but Walter was a good support system and a good man. She was much more scared than she wanted to admit and Holly whispered her thanks to him as she pulled away. She started to wander down the street slowly, staring at the windows absently as she thought about everything. Her phone chimed and she slipped it out of her purse to see that Aaron was calling. She swallowed the lump in her throat and answered it in a soft voice, hating what she was about to do.

  Holly let the tears fall as she hung up after giving him every excuse in the book about why she didn’t want to see him anymore.

  It was wrong.

  They could get in trouble.

  She didn’t want to be with him anymore.

  The rest blurred in her mind as she heard him arguing back, telling her that he didn’t want this. Holly could swear that she heard tears in his voice as he spoke, graceful when he ended the call so she could cry.

  Finding a small park with a bench, Holly sank down and cried harder as she realized that Aaron was gone. She’d done it. She was pregnant and on her own in New York, looking up and seeing that nobody was looking at her as they walked by or jogged.

  It just made her feel more alone.

  She ended up in some baby stores, looking towards her future as she eyed baby blankets and cribs. Their apartment was small but they had a small den where she could set up the baby’s room. Holly wasn’t sure if the fancy changing tables were necessary as she looked at them, deciding that a thick blanket and any safe surface might do the trick. The strollers were pricey and seemed impossible for her to own, despite her job and she knew that she didn’t have twenty girlfriends to have a big baby shower with.

  She was home and showered by the time practice started, wearing her comfortable yoga pants and a loose tee shirt, feeling like her stomach was showing her predicament. Lisa walked back into her therapy room, cleaning it up before she took a seat to watch them and see how everyone was doing. Holly knew that her skin was pale and that her eyes showed traces of red from all of the tears she’d cried, though everyone was focused on the players on the ice. Walter glanced up at her, smiling as s
he nodded back at him with a forced smile.

  Aaron sat on his couch staring forward, knowing that he could be at the practice but not wanting to see Holly right now. It was harder for him to think about going in when they were over more than it was when they were together. At least then he could talk to her. Now she acted like she never wanted to see her again. He didn’t believe that she was really done despite the phone call, feeling angry and lost as he sat in his house alone.

  Aaron was not the kind of guy to pursue a woman who had made it clear that she didn’t want to be with him and he’d always been that way, usually moving on with something casual easily. He didn’t want to harass Holly, but he didn’t believe her. Aaron leaned back and decided to give himself the day to wallow and be a human the next day, though tonight wouldn’t include whiskey.

  They were both needed at the arena the following night for a home game and she cried all the way up until she took a shower, since Lisa was at her graphic design job for the day. She washed her face under hot water as she felt dried up, wiping it off with a soft towel as she stood naked in front of the mirror. Holly was still slim and she ran her hands over her stomach slowly. She wasn’t showing yet but she knew that there was a life in there. What would she do when she was clearly pregnant? What would Aaron say?

  Holly felt like she should create something to go with her pregnancy, have a relationship to fall back on. She couldn’t even imagine that.

  She was in her room and dressed for the game before it started, her hair in a long French braid down her back. Holly heard the team coming down the walkway and she added some red lip tint to her dry lips to give herself some color to her pale face. Holly saw Tanner walk inside and she smiled his way as she walked forward to pretend to be an interested sports therapist that wasn’t broken inside.