by Avery James
“I work in D.C.: it’s my job to know how the figurative sausage is made.”
“I work in a kitchen: it’s my job to know how the literal sausage is made. Just remember, cooking is like everything else in life, you get out of it what you put in. The sauce was every bit as good as the sauce I’d eaten in the dining room of that restaurant years before, but I was too close to see it.”
Abby thought the better of making a joke about sausage, but she knew what Celine was saying, and she wasn’t talking about cooking. She was talking about Nolan. It was hard not to see the logic. Maybe Abby had been holding out for something perfect for too long. It wasn’t a case of settling, it was a case of acknowledging reality.
“Learn to appreciate the sauce for what it is, not what you want it to be,” Celine said.
Abby stood there for a moment, dumbstruck. Finally, she managed to say, “Thank you.”
“Another few minutes, and you should be ready to plate,” Celine said. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a sous chef to track down.”
As Abby turned to check on the stove, she thought more about what Celine had said. Maybe Abby was placing too high of expectations on herself and on Nolan. Maybe asking for perfection was too much. But if anyone could approach perfection, it was Nolan.
“I believe we have a soup to make,” Celine said as Abby drifted off in thought. She checked the time and then said, “Abby, hop in there with him.” As Celine led them through the steps of the recipe, Abby had to admit that she was actually enjoying cooking. Cutting, chopping, blending, searing, there were just so many things to do. And, with a little help, they all seemed very doable. After the chicken went into the oven, and the soup was nearly complete, Abby realized this was the most she’d ever done in a kitchen.
The soup smelled heavenly as Nolan stirred it. He must have caught her glancing because he dipped one finger into the butternut squash and basil bisque and lifted it to her lips. “Want to try?”
Abby pursed her lips as she leaned in slightly before teasing, “try it yourself.” She couldn’t help but smile as she watched him try it. There was just a hint of it on his lips. Abby raised her finger to his lips and wiped it off. “Missed some,” she said before leaning in for a quick kiss.
Celine loudly cleared her throat, reminding them they weren’t alone.
Abby kept her lips to herself until they’d chosen a wine and set the private table by the window.
As they made the salad and checked on their other courses, Abby could hardly believe the wonderful smells that filled the kitchen. Usually, all she could smell was the distinct fragrance of burnt Teflon, but every aroma in the kitchen made her stomach growl. The soup was bright orange, looked great, and smelled heavenly. And the rosemary chicken cooking in the oven had her practically drooling as she waited.
Of course, Celine had been there to coach them, and Nolan was paying more attention to her steps than his own, but it felt great. She could hardly believe her senses when she beheld the finished meal she and Nolan had cooked. Then Celine shooed them away to plate the meal, and Abby gladly took a seat at their table.
As they sat down to eat, she looked at Nolan. He was grinning. There was a hint of perspiration on his forehead. His face was flushed with color, which only highlighted the deep blue of his eyes. His eyes were locked on hers, and he seemed oblivious to the food on the table.
“Aren’t you hungry?” Abby asked.
“I thought I’d let you go first. Just in case.” He gave her a quick wink.
“Oh, is that how it is?” Abby said with a laugh. He was right, though. There was still a chance she’d screwed everything up somehow.
“Not at all,” Nolan said. “I just find myself wanting to skip ahead to the main course.” The way he looked at her made her wonder if he was talking about their dinner or something else.
Of course, the soup and salad Nolan had prepared were wonderful. The man was a natural at everything. As she reached the bottom of the soup bowl, she found herself wanting more. The fact that it would delay the judgment on her chicken only reinforced that desire.
And then there it was, the rosemary garlic roasted chicken with a side of mashed potatoes, sitting on the plate before her. It looked incredible, but with her track record, she worried it would be inedible.
“Maybe I should try this first,” she said. “So I can warn you.”
“Don’t be silly, that was just a joke. I’m sure it’s wonderful,” he said.
“I insist,” she replied. She took her fork and knife and cut herself a piece to try as Nolan looked on.
“Well?” he asked.
One bite told her everything she needed to know. It was delicious.
There were few people in the world with whom Abby felt comfortable passing more than a minute or two in silence, but as she sat across the table from Nolan, she felt no need to fill the air with small talk. She was content to revel in the glow she felt between them, a closeness, a contentment she hadn’t felt in a long, long time.
Chapter 12
From a distance, through the mist and the fog, the hideaway looked to Abby like an enormous barn. As they approached, she realized that was because it was an enormous barn. Or at least, it had been at one point. When Nolan pulled the SUV to a stop outside the hideaway, it was clear to Abby that the building had been meticulously renovated. As they walked around to the door, she got a sense of the beauty of the place. It had crisp, clean lines, a modern home made from a renovated barn. It was surrounded by rolling hills, and the fog clung to the valleys and hollows.
The interior of the hideaway was even more impressive than the outside. The massive posts and beams of the structure blended in with the reclaimed flooring. A contemporary kitchen looked out onto a living area with a wood stove. A twenty foot wide span of one of the walls was entirely taken up by segmented sliding doors.
“It’s warm in here,” Abby said. “I was expecting a chill.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know, I just had this image of us drinking cocoa by a fire, wrapped up in a blanket together. It seemed nice.”
“I had someone come and light the fires while we were leaving the restaurant,” he said.
“Fires?”
“The stove and, well, you’ll see.” He handed her a box they’d gotten from Celine upon leaving. “Can you put this in the fridge? It’s for later.” Abby opened the box and saw two ramekins, with chocolate. “Mousse,” Nolan said. “Like I said, we’ll have to save that for later.”
“Any reason why we’re not going to have it now?”
“We’ll have to wait until the time is right,” he said.
“And how will we know when the time is right?”
“We just will,” he said. “I promise.”
The main space of the first floor had ceilings that rose all the way to the roof of the barn. Banks of windows looked out from below the peak of the roofline, flooding the space with light, even on the dreary day. Abby marveled at the house as she walked from room to room. There was a sauna in the basement, and a pool room, too. On the first floor, besides the large living room and the dining area behind it, there were two bedrooms, one of which was set up as an office. It had prints of large animals framed on the wall.
“I found it,” Abby said as she walked into the office.
“Found what?” Nolan called from the other room.
“Come in here and see.” When he entered the room, she said, “the sign that we should eat that mousse.” She pointed to a picture of a moose.
“Oh,” Nolan groaned. “That’s bad.”
“It’s good,” Abby replied. “It’s a sign.”
“That is not our sign.”
“Fine, I know what will be,” she said.
“What would that be?” he asked, but she’d already taken off. She ran down the hall back into the main space.
“Are you stealing the mousse?!” Nolan called as he followed behind. She could hear his footsteps as he chased after her.
“Yes!” She didn’t turn around. She made the corner, and was almost to the fridge when Nolan caught up to her.
“Sorry, we have to wait,” he said as he wrapped his arms around her.
“I’m no good at delayed gratification.” She slipped out of his grasp and reached for the door.
“Is that so?” Nolan spun her around and looked into her eyes. Abby felt his breath against her lips. He was close enough to kiss her, and in an instant, all thoughts of chocolate mousse were gone from her mind. “Maybe I can convince you to wait just a little while,” he said.
“How would you do that?” she asked.
“Skillfully.” He placed his hands on her hips and leaned a little closer. His lips were pursed in a half-smile, just a slight upturn at the corners of his mouth, like he was amused. Abby could almost taste him.
“I’d like to see you try,” she said, but then he kissed her, and Abby felt a rush as he pressed against her, hooking one arm around her back as he leaned into the kiss, teasing his tongue against hers, eliciting a moan from her lips.
Abby wanted to savor this kiss, but she could barely contain the desire growing stronger inside her. She needed more. She pressed against him and felt the heat of his arousal. What was it about him that made her lose control? Usually, she had guys wrapped around her finger, but with Nolan, it had been different from the start.
Abby was so excited from the kiss that she felt almost out of breath. “Is that your best?” she asked, trying to act cool for just a little bit longer.
“Upstairs,” he said.
“And then the mousse?”
Nolan laughed. “Yeah, and then the mousse.”
“Lead the way,” Abby said.
“No wonder you brought me here,” Abby said as she looked at the fire burning in the fireplace. Its flickering light cast the room in a soft glow that shifted and danced. She was sitting on the edge of a large bed that had a white comforter and what must have been ten pillows. Nolan had carried her up the stairs and tossed her down on the mattress. He stood over her like a conqueror. In the soft light, he looked especially attractive. “It’s worlds better than making out on a couch.” Abby reached for Nolan’s shirt. She knew exactly what she wanted.
“Hey,” he said. “Maybe this isn’t the right time to say this, but we should keep doing this.”
“Having sex?” Abby said. “Sounds like a plan to me.” She pulled off her shirt and tossed it aside. Nolan hooked his fingers beneath the waistband of her leggings and pulled them off in one quick motion.
“I mean we should keep seeing each other,” he said as Abby unbuttoned his shirt, exposing his bare chest. “I know what you said. And I know what I said, but I like you, and you like me, and that should be enough.”
“I do like you.” Abby grabbed his belt and undid it with a quick motion. A moment later, his pants were off. She wasn’t really in the mood for a conversation, so she pulled him on top of her and kissed him. Through his boxers, she could feel his arousal, and as he ground against her, she thought maybe they could put off the conversation for a little while, but Nolan pulled back and gave her the look. He rolled onto the bed next to her so he was on his back.
“I like you a lot,” she said as she climbed on top of him. “And I really like that thing you do, you know, with your penis. I think it’s called sex.” She slid her hand down his chest and over his abs. God, he was hot.
“It’s more than just sex,” he said. On that point he was right, but that didn’t mean she wanted to figure everything out in this moment. She just wanted things to be simple for a while longer.
“Shh,” she whispered. She slid her hand lower until she had her hand around his erection. He was getting hard again, and feeling his arousal made her want him even more. She kissed his neck and then his chest and worked her way lower.
When she took him in her mouth, she heard him moan. She liked that sound, the low, guttural sound of his pleasure.
He ran his fingers through her hair, and she looked up at him as he tilted his head back. She loved the way his smooth skin felt against her tongue. She loved the heat of his arousal. She didn’t know why it turned her on so much to make him want her, but it did. She wanted him badly. She could feel herself getting more and more turned on, and she wanted to feel his touch between her thighs. She dragged a hand across his tensed abs and the over his hip as she teased him with her tongue.
“I need you now,” he said between shallow breaths, but Abby made him wait.
“Condom,” she said. Nolan grabbed one from the nightstand and tore it from its package.
“Come here,” he said as she rolled it onto his length.
Abby straddled him and pressed herself against him. The heat of his erection was against her core. She wanted to lose herself in the complete and overwhelming bliss she felt when he was inside her, but Nolan placed a hand against her and stopped her from going further. “You’re the one who told me to come here,” she said.
“And now you’re here,” he said.
“I’d prefer to be a little lower,” she said.
“A little?” He had his hands around her waist, and he looked into her eyes as he planted a kiss on her lips. Then he slid a hand between her thighs and Abby trembled with excitement. He traced his finger against her, rubbing gently before pushing inside, coaxing a gasp from her lips. Abby dug her fingers into his shoulders and braced herself against him as the pleasure grew stronger. He kissed her again, stealing the breath from her lips as he drove her towards completion. He deepened the kiss, but Abby couldn’t wait any longer.
“I need you now,” she said.
Nolan obliged. He placed his hands on her hips and lowered her against his length, sinking inside her in a long, tender motion. Abby felt Nolan’s breath hot on her lips as he moaned with excitement. In a voice barely more than a whisper, he managed to say one word, “Abby,” before she kissed him again, sealing her lips against his as closely as she could.
Slowly, she rolled her hips against his, following the lead of his hands as he rocked her. Then faster. And faster. She rocked herself against him until they reached a frantic pace. She wanted him, needed him in a way that was far more than physical. She closed her eyes and focused on the way he felt against her, the way he made every inch of her ache with desire until the pleasure was so strong that she felt like she couldn’t handle it for another second.
But Nolan brought her further, drawing cries of complete ecstasy from her lips until finally, she couldn’t hold back any longer. She tensed herself as she felt the orgasm building up inside.
Nolan tightened his hold on her, pulling her ever so slightly harder against himself until she shouted out in bliss. The orgasm rolled through her body, leaving her breathless, dazed, and completely satisfied.
Nolan leaned back and took a deep breath. She could feel his heart pounding against her chest. “That was incredible,” he said.
“What happened to my marathon man?” Abby asked between breaths.
“I think that was more of a sprint,” he said.
Abby just shook her head. As she lay next to Nolan, Abby watched the fire glow as it slowly burned itself down. It cast orange and yellow light over their skin, and the way it flickered made her feel like their bodies were still moving. Of course, they weren’t. They were both trying to catch their breath.
She hadn't realized how much she needed a break, but as she watched the fire crackle and glow in the hearth, she knew she needed this. She'd worked herself up so much in her job that she'd allowed it to take over, to crowd out everything else. What's worse, she'd convinced herself that it was a good thing. She'd convinced herself that she wasn't missing out on anything, but even with everything she'd accomplished professionally, she'd never felt this kind of satisfaction. Maybe satisfaction was the wrong word, maybe it was completeness, fullness, happiness. The work, the lifestyle, it hadn't made her happy. Sure, she was good at it, but was that really enough? Finally, she let out a deep breath.
“That was…”
“Yeah,” was his response. He exhaled deeply as he put his hands behind his head. “It was.”
There was so much that they hadn’t said in words. Abby wondered if they even needed to. She felt closer to Nolan than she’d ever felt to anyone. “Just give me a day to think things over, ok? I’m trying not to be completely impulsive here.” After a short silence, she added, “Damn Vermont trip, I told you it would be unfair.”
“Of course, but when it comes to you, I’ll never play fair,” he said. “I’ll use any advantage I can get.”
“Is that right?” Abby asked.
“Whatever it takes.”
“Watch out,” Abby said as she planted a soft kiss on his cheek. “I just might hold you to that.”
Nolan wrapped his arm around her and pulled her in. Even in the moments after making love, there was a thrill to feeling her bare skin against his. “You can hold me any way you like,” he teased. He slid his hand under her chin and tilted her face up to receive another kiss, another burst of warmth and rush of excitement as he rolled her on top of him. She felt a dizzy delight, a rush as he deepened the kiss, before planting another and another on her lips.
He was right, he did have an unfair advantage, but it had nothing to do with his money and everything to do with the way she felt in his arms, the safety and warmth and excitement that he somehow bundled together. As he ran his hands down her sides again, she wondered how it was possible to be so completely satisfied while still needing someone so badly.
“You’re smiling,” he said as their lips parted from a long kiss.
“That’s your fault,” she said. “Like I said, it’s completely unfair.”