by Gay, Gloria
Those were awful times, Violet. The streets were splattered with blood. It’s no wonder it was called "The Terror."
"Mama, promise to never again use that word in relation to you."
"I promise, dear. You know me; I like to call a spade a spade."
"Don't, dearest, please, it hurts me too much."
"I promise never to use that word again, my love. I shall use 'courtesan' or demimonde, whatever you deem better." Sadie leaned over and kissed her daughter's smooth cheek.
"I would prefer that you never again refer to yourself by any of those words, either, Mama. Promise?"
"I promise. You are a funny girl, Violet, but I will do as you say. Never again."
"It’s amazing that those women who cuckold their husbands without a second thought see themselves as pure and dare put labels on you! They should be putting those labels on themselves. And many of the widows are reckless and immoral as well. You cannot convince me that because the money their lovers give them are in the form of jewels that they are any different from the money a courtesan accepts. "
"Well," said her mother with a sigh. "I’ll let you sort all that out, my sweet Violet. If you want me to think of myself as a lady, I shall do so, only for your sake. "
"And Papa’s " added Violet.
"Yes," said Sadie, her eyes misting, "for your sweet father, who changed our lives. I love him so much and will do so until my last breath. That is his wish, also, that I consider myself a lady. "
Violet, hugged her mother. "Eventually, Mama, seeing you as the lady you have become, they will see you as a lady. Of that I am certain."
"Well, if it makes you happy, my love," answered Sadie, "That is all I care for. And I believe I have become a credit to your papa. He tells me so quite often."
Sadie did not want to hammer in what she fervently believed, that not only did society believe her to be a whore now and always, but that Violet, her pure, beautiful Violet was also to be seen thus for the rest of her life.
"Papa is an angel, just like you," said Violet, giving her mother a warm hug. "People cannot but come to realize it, eventually."
"The duke certainly thinks you’re an angel," said Sadie, anxious to change a painful subject. "All this trouble he is going through is for you alone. I could not but observe how he looked at you at our musicale and dance."
"Yes, but sadly, though, he’s after one thing only. I cannot countenance his overtures to me, Mama, for I know they lead only to one road."
"Perhaps. But I want you to have a good time in the process," said Sadie. "You’ve been confined to the fringes of society for too long. You should be dancing the night away, not attending balls as a companion to Lady Jessica."
Lady Jessica was the daughter of Lord and Lady Benniton, who were of the few who had not shunned Lord Kelly and his family.
"Jessie is coming over soon," said Violet, her eyes lighting up at the thought of her only friend due to arrive any moment. "Oh, I hear the doorbell, I believe she has arrived."
"Go on down and meet her, my sweet," said Sadie, "And bring her up to see the new clothes that were delivered for you."
Violet ran down the stairs and soon both girls ran up the stairs to see Violet's new gowns that had been recently sent by the modiste.
Jessica was a sweet pretty girl with dark curly hair and blue eyes who was blossoming in her first season. Violet was extremely fond of her and Jessie returned it in kind. Lord Benniton was a close friend of both the Earl of Arandale and Lord Kelly and had been only one of a handful of friends who had not turned their backs on Lord Kelly when Lord Kelly had married Sadie.
The girls spent a long time with the new clothes and perusing the plates from the magazines Jessie had brought to look over with Violet.
* * *
In St. James Square, another conversation concerning the invitation to the house party at the castle was taking place between Lady Galena, daughter of the Earl of Maddington and her mother, Lady Selena, Countess Maddington.
"I cannot attend, Galena, I feel la grippe coming on. I would not survive that vast drafty castle," Her mother insisted.
"I will order your room warmed with a fire at all hours, Mama, but you will attend," answered Galena, "Of that I am certain. No one else will do at this late hour and I have my mind set on marrying a duke."
"Do consider," said Lady Selena, "I may not come out of that place alive and then you will be motherless."
"It would be Aunt Ella who would come out in a casket from the castle, Mama, so spare your sister, who is frailer even than you, for I swear, if you do not attend I will drag Aunt Ella there and then it will be on your conscience.
"Have you not seen her pallor of late and how she can barely stand for two minutes on end? She absolutely disgusted me when I asked her to tie my back ribbons because Millie was out on an errand for me. She stopped in the middle of doing it and could not go on. Then she excused herself enough to drive me to distraction. No, Mama, it will not do to have her around when she is of no earthly use to anyone, including herself."
"Hush, Galena, she may hear you," said her mother with a quick glance at the door. "Do be kinder to her; she was a dear sister to me always and I must now care for her."
"Enough already," Galena almost yelled in exasperation. "The subject is tiring me. Let’s get back to the subject of the duke."
"But Galena,” said her mother puzzled, "why have you set your mind on the Duke of Hawkinston? Why not the Duke of Callingheath, who is unattached?"
"To a brain, Mama."
"Really, Galena, I hope you don’t express such sentiments in public. You will be branded a hellion if you do.
"Hmm, what about the Duke of Clarence?"
"You can’t be serious!" Galena laughed out loud. "Even though 'His Grace' is not anymore living with that actress, 'Mrs. Jordan,' in that horrid slum in Whitechapel and breeding a dozen illegitimate children, and even had he not finally decided to produce a legitimate heir and become engaged to be married, as he finally did, I still would not dream of considering him as a marriage prospect."
"The Duke of Kent?"
"It would have to be by proxy," said Galena with another burst of laughter, "for the duke has been in his grave for some time now. Do try to keep up with the news, Mama, it’s becoming embarrassing."
"There are so many dukes and earls that I may be forgiven if I sometimes confuse them, missy," said her mother crossly. "Anyway, how do you know Hawkinston will look your way? I don't believe he favors forward girls such as you." Lady Selena moved quickly away from her daughter, who was wont to use violence against her when she disagreed with her.
"You forget I have danced on several occasions with the duke, Mama. He has favored me above others several times," answered Galena, shaking her head. These occasions had been few and far between but Galena had set her cap on the duke ever since. "And anyhow," she added, "I have made up my mind. And you know how things go when I make up my mind, Mama."
"Yes," said her mother with resignation, "I know," then added, "I will spend most of the time in bed in my room, Galena. How will I serve as a chaperone if I am tied to my bed, as I am certain to be?"
"I will have Millie with me, while you will have Ellie to attend you. Millie will do just fine."
"A lady's maid is fine for strolling in the garden and such but she cannot attend the functions, Galena."
"Countess Daving, your dear friend, is also invited, Mama. She will keep an eye out for me if you ask her. But just an eye, mind you, for I do not like her meddling."
"Hmm. Well, all right, then. I don't recall an instance when I have not given in to your will. Surely this is not the way to raise a daughter."
"I am raising myself," said Galena with a satisfied grin. "That should be enough for you, Mama, for you have never taken to heart the mother part of your life."
"Nor the wife part, apparently," said the countess, "I hardly ever see your other parent."
Lady Maddington had been only a brief interr
uption in Lord Maddington's long list of affairs with Cyprians. Barely two weeks after they had returned from their honeymoon, Lord Maddington had resumed relations with his mistress of the moment.
"Let us talk of more cheerful things;" said Galena, noticing that her mother had slumped, deep in her own sad thoughts. "My wardrobe, for instance. We must begin at once, for I fully intend to outshine everyone there.
"Look Mama, Millie has brought the latest edition of La Belle Assemblée. Let us look through the pages."
"You do, Galena, I feel too weak. Just point out things you see. I shall just recline here beside you."
"But not too close, Mama, as you know, I cannot abide anyone breathing too close to my face."
Galena's heart-shaped face that had sugary features made up of an equally heart-shaped mouth, craftily arched eyebrows and well-shaped pale blue eyes belied her resolve. For this reason, no one ever saw her or her schemes coming.
She had separated Lady Ellen, her friend since childhood, from her fiancée, and then tossed the young man when she had decided that a viscount was not really in her class. The young couple, in love before, had been left bereft, like driftwood on the beach. Lady Ellen had gone to Cornwall to recover and the young man had accepted a commission in India, unwilling to face the storm of protest against him for having jilted his bride.
And not one soul in all of London suspected that Lady Galena had been at the bottom of the whole sorry business.
CHAPTER 9
"Everything is ready, then?" Violet glanced at her mother as Sadie spoke to Bendy Jones, the driver, as the outriders were placing their food basket and small travel cases in the carriage.
"Have all our boxes been placed in the other carriage?" Sadie asked.
"Yes, my lady," Bendy responded. "Sam and me, we put all the boxes in after we checked the wheels."
Violet could see that her mother was nervous and upset as she always was at the beginning of a journey. Her cloak was flapping in the wind and the hood had fallen back. Her nose was red and her eyes were teary from the cold. When she had complained the night before of a pressure in her chest. Violet had asked her if she was really up to the journey as she touched her forehead, which was too warm.
“We can still change our plans, Mama.” Violet said, but her mother shook her head.
"No, my dear, it’s nothing. By tomorrow I will be better.”
Bendy brought their attention back to the moment.
"We only await Lord Kelly and his valet, m’lady. They should be out soon. He wanted you and Miss Violet and Lady Bea to board the carriage because it be chilly out so early in the morning. Annie and Maribel are in the other carriage with the luggage already," he added, referring to the ladies' maids.
"Yes, we should best wait in the carriage for him, under the warm rugs," said Sadie and turned to Lady Bea, who was fidgeting nearby with the lock in her portmanteau.
"I prefer to travel with the abigails, Sadie," Lady Bea informed Sadie. "The other carriage will be roomier with only us three inside and as you know, I must take my naps."
"Certainly Bea," said Sadie warmly, reaching out and giving Lady Bea a hug. "Come, Violet, let’s help Bea settle into the other carriage first. Have you placed rugs in both carriages, Bendy?"
"Yes, they’re very warm now, my lady," the driver replied, "and the bottles are very hot."
"Good, good," said Sadie. "I cannot abide cold feet and now with my cold they have become indispensable.
"Come Violet, my love, let us board," she said to her daughter after they had settled Lady Bea in the other carriage.
Kelly spoke to them once they were settled. He planned to ride his horse alongside the carriages off and on as he disliked to sit inside a carriage for too long.
Once they were settled inside the carriage, Violet and her mother leaned back against the squabs and discussed the house party at the castle.
"For how long is the invitation, Mama?" asked Violet.
"Well, today is Tuesday, my sweet, so I imagine it will be until next Tuesday. The Almack's ball is to be held on Wednesday, as usual, and that house party crowd must attend. We, of course have no vouchers for Almack's to worry about, so we can stay at the castle through the next weekend."
"Surely not!"
"I was jesting, my sweet. Surely your mama can make a joke?"
"Yes, of course, Mama. I don't know why I didn't see it just as the jest it is. I'm bit overwrought, I believe. All this is too much too suddenly."
"Do calm yourself, Vi, and perhaps catch up on your sleep," said Sadie, who was not much calmer herself. "I heard you going down to the library for a book last night—late.
"No, Violet," she added hastily when Violet made an attempt to kiss her, "refrain from kissing me or hugging me while I have the cold. Remember that for some reason you catch my cold and I catch yours. It would not do for you to be too ill to attend the functions and your father is anxious for you to participate in them."
"Very well, Mama, if you insist, for I rarely catch a cold anymore. But I slept little last night, I confess. All this is making me very ill indeed. I can hardly settle down my thoughts."
"But why, Violet, when it is obvious it is being done for your sake?"
"If it were not that I believe this will go far to advance Papa's re-acceptance by society, I would have declined, Mama. I can’t abide things being done for hidden purposes such as this, even though it will be a treat to stay at the castle."
"I believe the duke has great expectations from you," said Sadie, smiling widely.
Violet frowned. "However that may be, his grace has a surprise in store for him if he believes it will sway me in any way. I am firm in my commitment and nothing he says or does will change my mind. Of that I am certain, Mama."
"I'm glad of that, Vi. I have become convinced that a lady's reputation is the only real treasure she possesses. Deep down I'm really not 'Lady Kelly,' I'm just Sadie. Nothing I do will make anyone forget I was—"
"Mama—" interrupted Violet, "—you promised, remember?"
"Yes, my dear, I forgot I promised never to mention that time again. And the promise is a good thing, too. I believe I was too fond of remembering a time that is much better to forget. But let me say one thing and then never mention the subject again, Vi. However much I deserve the scorn thrust on me, you do not deserve any of it. You were forced to become Shackel's, Vi, there is a big difference—and you are so young, too.
“You now have the opportunity to hold firm in your beliefs."
"I have become used to the opinion society has of me, Mama," said Violet turning to the window, a faraway look in her eyes, "and it does not bother me anymore. It did at first, but the years have piled up on that and change never came, however much I wished for it. I am viewed today as I was viewed six years ago."
"My darling, I don't like that sad look in your eyes; it makes me very sad too. Perhaps things will change for the better. I have a premonition that this invitation will be the turning point in our lives."
"I doubt it, Mama.” Violet’s blue eyes had filled with tears and she wiped them hurriedly, turning to the window, so that her mother would not see them.
"But even though I can’t change society's opinion of me nor do I want to anymore, I do have control over one person: myself. No one will turn me into what I will not be turned into. Thankfully, I do not have to marry. Papa has provided for me for the rest of my life."
"Take care then, Vi, for the duke is a handsome man."
"More arresting than handsome, I should think,” Violet said with a sigh. She was attracted to him in a way it was difficult for her to account for but she did not think him handsome in the usual way. "In what way do you think him appealing, Mama?"
"Oh, I don't know, a certain something, the way he carries himself, his shapely head and his wide shoulders. He has eyes that hold your glance to him, does he not?"
"Yes,” Violet agreed.
"Be careful you don't succumb to that attraction."
She realized that she was trying to convince herself as much as her mother that she did not find him appealing.
"And as to a lady's reputation," said Violet to her mother, "quite a few 'ladies' that are members of the aristocracy possess no such thing as a good reputation. Because a lady had the title before she engaged in all manner of intrigue and affairs she is shielded from people knowing what she really is and her reputation remains intact. Even some of the Almacks patronesses lead scandalous secret lives."
"I agree, Vi," said Sadie, "They may deny they accept money for their favors but they do so just the same. They have their gaming bets settled by their lovers and given valuable jewels and clothes. Their affairs are under cover of 'family' and 'surname' but they are affairs just the same.
"But you have always been wiser than me, my Vi, so I have more faith in you to withstand pressure than I did."
Sadie, reclined her head against the gold velvet squabs. "I thank the Lord for that. Mama and Papa, your grandparents, came from the French gentry, as you will recall," she added. "But when they slid into dire poverty it ceased to matter where they came from. Oftentimes we had not even a piece of bread to share among the eight of us. Both my brothers were commandeered into the ranks and died in those bloody battles, fighting this war or that."
"Don’t speak of the past, Mama, for it is making you sad," interrupted Violet on seeing her mother's eyes fill with tears.
She well knew the story of how her grandfather, stripped of his house and all his possessions, had been only able to secure work on an English ship and had died of dysentery, leaving them in the direst poverty imaginable.