“Jah. I came home as soon as I could. I thought you might not be taking the news well.”
“It gave me a headache, but more than anything else, I had to get away by myself.”
“I understand.” He sat on the bed by her side. “I think her coming here is a blessing. Whether she allows us to raise the baby or whether we have our grosskin in our lives, Simon’s boppli is a gift.”
Marie smiled. “I agree. Of course, it’s true. He has blessed us with another child in our lives even though it didn’t come the way we expected.”
Joel chuckled, and whispered, “Gott rarely does things the way we expect them. His ways are higher than our ways.” He lifted the cloth from her forehead, his fingertips brushing her skin. “You feel hot. I'll refresh this and bring it right back.”
When he returned, she said, “I’m shocked by Bree coming here.”
Joel placed the cloth on her forehead. “It’s a shock to all of us. Lie back and rest.”
She lowered herself further down on the bed. “Well what do we do now?”
“We can only wait. Wait to see what happens and then hope that the Bishop says she can stay with us for a time. I don't see why he won't. Many people have visitors, and not all of them Amish.”
“Jah, they do.” Marie took a deep breath and stared into her husband’s face. There was something on her mind and she had to say it. “I've had a thought; what if this baby is not Simon’s?”
Joel shook his head. “If the girl says so, we must believe that it is. She’d have no reason to cook up a story. If she wasn’t certain, she wouldn’t come here and tell us that it was Simon’s. She doesn’t seem a cruel girl.”
“That's true. I shouldn't have said anything.”
He patted his wife on her hand.
“She does seem a very sweet girl. I can see why Simon liked her so much. Bree’s just the kind of girl I would have imagined him with.”
Joel nodded. “Don’t upset yourself by worrying about things.”
“Will you stay by me and have dinner up here?”
“If that’s what you want. We’ll let Bree settle in with Andrew and Cora since they’re closer to her age.”
“Jah. That sounds gut.”
“Are you well enough to eat a little?”
“I think I am. I don't have a really bad headache I think it's more shock and surprise that’s made me feel so poor. Joel, do you think this could be an answer to our prayers?”
“Gott does answer prayers even if He takes a long time.
Marie sighed. “This time it has been long. I was just so shocked to see her standing there almost as though I knew what she was going to say. Do you think that’s odd?”
Joel shrugged. “It’s not often we get a young Englischer knocking on our door.” He leaned over, lifted the washcloth, and kissed Marie’s forehead. “You stay here. I’ll go and tell them I’m eating up here with you. Later tonight, I must go and talk to Bree, but I’ll do that after the evening meal.”
Chapter 5
Blessed is the man that trusteth in the LORD, and whose hope the LORD is.
Jeremiah 17:7
* * *
Dinner that night didn’t go any better. Mr. and Mrs. Stauffer ate dinner in their bedroom, and Bree had dinner in the kitchen with only Cora and Andrew. No one mentioned the reason she was there and dinner was mostly eaten in silence.
When they’d only just finished dinner, they heard scratching sounds at the back door.
“That’ll be Dusty,” Andrew said, jumping up from the table. As soon as he opened the door, a golden retriever rushed in. Andrew caught up with him before he bounded on Bree. “Settle down, Dusty; mind your manners.”
“He’s lovely,” Bree said.
“That’s because you haven’t gotten to know him yet,” Cora said.
Andrew knelt beside him. “He’s a bundle of energy and he’s got a mind of his own. I’ve barely been able to train him.”
“That’s because he’s not a smart dog,” Cora added.
Bree looked at the dog who was enjoying Andrew giving him a neck rub. “Maybe he’s extra smart; too smart for tricks.”
“I’m not trying to teach him any tricks. We’re struggling with sit, stand, and especially stay. He just doesn’t listen.” He looked down at Dusty. “Where have you been anyway?” He looked up at Bree. “He was with me and Dat in the fields and then he took off and wouldn’t come back.”
“He could’ve seen a rabbit or something,” Cora said.
“Maybe.” He said to Bree, “He’s only three, but he still thinks he’s a pup. Still acts like one.”
“Everyone ready for dessert?” Cora asked as she rose from the table.
“Yes please,” Bree had never been one to turn down sweets of any kind.
“I know you won’t say no, Andrew. I’ll go up and get Mamm and Dat’s plates and see if they want dessert.”
Bree watched Cora walk out of the kitchen and wondered if Mrs. Stauffer could be that ill if she was still able to eat. Whenever Bree had a migraine she hadn’t been able to eat anything at all.
Andrew left Dusty and sat back down at the table. “My father said he’d come down and talk to you after dinner.”
“That’s good; that’ll make me feel a little better.”
“They’re glad you’ve come, so you don’t need to be worried about that.”
“I’m not worried.” Bree did her best to smile.
He chuckled. “Well, you do look a little worried, unless you go around with a permanent frown on your face.”
“I’ve been very stressed these past few weeks with wondering what to do with the baby.”
“It can’t be easy I’d imagine.”
“What can’t?”
“To be in your situation.”
“It’s not easy at all. I never thought this would happen to me. It was always something that only happens to other people.”
“It was a shock to us all when Simon left us. It’s been especially difficult for my parents because he died on his rumspringa which was probably their worst fear with him being away.”
Bree knew their beliefs so she nodded sympathetically. “Your parents believe he won’t enter God’s kingdom.”
“That’s right. If he’d come home and been baptized into our faith, that would’ve been an entirely different thing and my parents wouldn’t be grieving so hard.”
“Maybe I shouldn’t have come.”
“You’ve done right to come here. This will bring my parents happiness. They’re just getting used to the idea. Trust me,” he said.
Cora came back into the room with two empty plates. “They don’t want dessert so it’s just us.”
Cora dished out apple pie and cream and then sat at the table with them while Dusty sat down looking at everyone eating.
“This is the best apple pie I’ve ever had in my life,” Bree said to Cora.
Cora giggled. “I’ll show you how to make it if you want.”
“I doubt mine will taste like this even if you show me how to do it.” Bree had never been interested in cooking, but what else was she going to do while she was here? There was no electricity, no Internet, and no television. “I’d like you to teach me. I can always give it a go.”
Cora smiled at her.
When they finished dessert Cora refused to let Bree help with the washing up. Instead, she insisted Bree go into the living room and said her father was coming down to talk to her soon. Bree sat in the living room with Simon's brother, hoping what Mr. Stauffer was coming down to say would be something positive. She didn’t think they would turn her out on the street with nowhere to go and besides, they had said that she could stay there for a few nights.
More than anything Bree hoped they’d agree to adopt the baby. It just wasn’t enough for them to be the grandparents because then she would feel a sense of responsibility and she wanted to walk away free and clear.
She looked over at Andrew who looked just as uncomfortable as sh
e felt. He smiled at her and she smiled back. To make conversation, she asked, “Did you ever go on a rumspringa?”
“No, I never did. Cora wanted to go until Simon had the accident.”
“Best she doesn’t go.”
“That’s exactly what I told her.”
When Mr. Stauffer came downstairs, he sat on the couch opposite Bree. “Marie has one of her headaches so we might have to talk to you more about this tomorrow, Bree.”
Bree nodded. “Thank you for allowing me to stay here.”
“You are very welcome,” he said. “We normally have a Bible reading after dinner. You’re welcome to stay and listen.”
“I’d like that.” Bree figured she’d make an effort to fit in if she wanted them to allow her to stay there until the birth.
Mr. Stauffer looked at Andrew. “Go and get your schweschder.” Andrew disappeared into the kitchen and came back with Cora. Once everyone was seated, Mr. Stauffer opened his Bible and proceeded to read. His words in the old English Bible language were hard to understand so Bree sat there and did her best to appear interested.
When Mr. Stauffer closed the Bible, Cora stood. “I’ll finish cleaning the kitchen.”
“I’ll help you,” Bree said rising to her feet.
Core turned around to face Bree. “There’s no need. I’m nearly finished, I just have to put a few plates away, and that’s all.”
Feeling awkward now, Bree said good night to everybody and went upstairs hoping she wasn’t being rude or going to bed too early. When she walked up to the bedroom, she closed the door behind her feeling bad about all the upheaval she’d caused them.
It hadn’t been her intention to cause any of Simon’s family stress. He had said that they wanted another child, so surely any stress she created for them now would be made up for when the baby arrived. One thing she knew for certain was that her baby would be better off being raised by Simon’s parents than raised by her.
Chapter 6
He that loveth not knoweth not God;
for God is love.
1 John 4:8
* * *
The next morning, Bree woke up and listened to see if she could hear any signs of anyone being awake. She switched on her cell phone and waited to get a signal. The phone beeped when it turned on, and she saw there were still no messages. The time on the screen was nine o’clock. After she turned it off, she pushed it to the bottom of her bag.
Bree changed into her dress and headed downstairs certain she’d see someone in the kitchen. Another thing Simon had told her about his family was that they were early risers. When she walked into an empty kitchen, she headed to the window and looked outside. Mrs. Stauffer and Cora were both outside digging about in their garden.
She walked outside to join them. “I hope you’re feeling better, Mrs. Stauffer.”
Mrs. Stauffer looked up. “I am, thank you, a lot better. Come inside and I’ll fix you some breakfast.”
“We thought you’d never wake up,” Cora blurted out.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t realize it was so late.”
Mrs. Stauffer was nearly inside, so Bree followed her.
When they were both in the kitchen, Mrs. Stauffer said, “Have a seat.”
Bree sat down while Cora kept working outside. It was a perfect opportunity to talk to Mrs. Stauffer in private. “I didn’t come here to cause you upset or concern. I can’t keep my baby and from what Simon said about you and his life here, you’d be the perfect people to raise my baby.” She didn’t want to offend Marie by talking about abortion, but Bree had considered it, and then dismissed it. It was too late for that now anyway. “I can’t keep my baby and I want to know that he or she will have a good life.”
Mrs. Stauffer nodded. “If you truly can’t keep this baby that Simon and you made together we would be only too happy to raise the baby as our grandchild.
That was only half of what Bree wanted to hear; she’d still be morally and legally responsible for the child. A full adoption was what was best. “It makes me happy to hear that, but would you be the legal guardians and adopt the baby properly?”
“Is that really what you want?”
“Yes, I’ve thought the whole thing through and it’s the best for the baby.”
“Why don’t you wait until after the baby is born and see how you feel?”
Bree shook her head. “I can’t do that. I need to make a decision with my head and not my heart. And if I know now that you’ll adopt the baby, I can switch my feelings off and the whole thing will be easier for me.”
“We should all talk; you, me, and Mr. Stauffer when he gets home.” She turned her back to Bree, leaned down and took a frying pan out of a cupboard. Once she turned back to Bree, she said, “Now, we had pancakes for breakfast so would you like the same, with maple syrup?”
“Thank you, that would be lovely.”
“And coffee?”
“I can’t drink coffee anymore. It makes me feel a little sick in the tummy.”
“Hot nettle tea?”
“That sounds like it would be good. Thank you.”
As Mrs. Stauffer used a wooden spoon to mix the batter in a bowl, she muttered, “I don’t know why Simon wouldn’t have brought you around to meet us especially since he was coming back to the community.”
Bree shrugged. “I really don’t know. I think he might have been ashamed how it all happened.”
After Mrs. Stauffer put the first pancake in the pan, she sat down with Bree. “Why didn’t he marry you right away when you both found out?”
“My parents are strict. They wanted me to marry someone else and I never told them about the baby until just recently.” She looked down at the table hoping she’d deflected the question. “And that’s when they threw me out of the house.”
At the sound of the pan sizzling, Mrs. Stauffer rose to her feet and then flipped the pancake over.
“It smells good,” Bree said, suddenly hungry.
Mrs. Stauffer stood over the pan with the spatula up in the air. “And when is the baby due?”
“Around four months time.”
“You don’t look that far along.”
“I know, but I am.”
Mrs. Stauffer poured the tea and placed a cup in front of her.
“I’m wondering if I might be able to stay here until the baby is born? I only ask because I’ve got nowhere else to go. I’ll help out with chores and things, and what I don’t know how to do I’ll learn.”
“Mr. Stauffer is talking to our bishop about the situation today, so we’ll see what he says when he gets home.”
“Where do your husband and Andrew work? I know they’re builders.”
“My husband works in different places depending on where the work is. They’re building a house now at the edge of town about twenty minutes away. Sometimes he works in his office in the barn, but that’s only paperwork.”
Bree nodded and remembered that Simon said that his family had a phone in the barn and not in their house. “Thank you,” Bree said when she looked down and saw the tea in front of her. She took a sip to warm herself; it tasted like a weak herbal tea, which, of course, was what it was. “I’ve never had this before. It tastes good.”
“Cora makes it out of wild nettles.”
The thought of drinking hot liquid strained through weeds made the drink unappetizing.
“Are you very hungry?”
“I am now, it smells so good.”
Before long, Bree was eating her way through the stack of pancakes in front of her. “These are totally delicious,” she said to Mrs. Stauffer, who was sitting at the same table.
“You’ve already eaten I guess?” Bree asked, more for conversation than anything else.
“Yes, Cora and I get up early and make breakfast to send Mr. Stauffer and Andrew off with a good meal.”
Bree nodded and hoped her child would be a boy. The Amish had very defined roles, and even though there were many good things about their lifestyle, Bree wo
ndered if the men didn’t have it slightly better.
“Shall I help you with something today?” Bree wasn’t normally a helpful girl but there was nothing else to do around the place; she couldn’t just sit around and do nothing.
“Cora and I are doing the garden. We’re weeding; you can come out and talk to us if you’d like.”
“I don’t mind helping.”
“No. You don’t have to.”
“I’d like to, but you’d have to tell me which ones are the weeds.”
Mrs. Stauffer laughed. “You don’t know about fences, shelling peas, or weeds. We might be able to teach you a few things if you stay long enough.”
Bree laughed and then took another mouthful of tea.
“Bree, there are some things I’d like to talk to you about.” Mrs. Stauffer moved to sit closer to Bree.
“I’ll tell you whatever you want to know.”
“I didn't even see him for a whole year before he died and I just wonder what he was like in that year; he would’ve grown up considerably.”
“How I knew him was as my best friend. We liked each other immediately. He was funny, lively, and kind.” Bree giggled when his laughing face came into her mind. “He always made me laugh.”
“He was always a joker. He loved to play pranks on people and always saw the funny side of things.
Bree nodded. “And he did like cars. I think that’s the main reason he stayed away from the community. He and his group of friends all raced cars.” Bree hoped she wasn’t saying things that would make Mrs. Stauffer sadder than she already was. “I’m not sure what else to tell you; he was just Simon. Another thing I can tell you is he was always there for me, he always had my back.”
Mrs. Stauffer tilted her head to the side. “What does ‘had your back’ mean exactly?”
“He was always on my side with everything and would defend me if he had to.”
Mrs. Stauffer nodded. “Sounds like he was the same boy that I knew.”
“Yes, I don't think he would've changed from how you knew him; that's just how he was.”
Their Son's Amish Baby Page 3