by R. E. Butler
She looked at Chris in surprise. "You shaved!"
He chuckled, gesturing to Cadence as he popped a potato chip into his mouth. "She made me. Said she wouldn't dance with me all scruffy."
She laughed, and Cadence did, too, and she said, "Well, it's about damn time. How can anyone see how cute you are when you're covered in stubble like a hobo?"
Chris groaned, flushing with embarrassment and it was totally adorable. "Shit, mom. Not cute, okay? Anything but cute."
She waved her hand at him to dismiss his chiding words and it made Cadence smile even more but also made her a little sadder. She never got to tease her mom or be embarrassed by her. Her dad, yes, but not in a fun way.
Chris extracted her from Renee's grip and they walked the few hundred feet to where the packs were gathered, through a stand of trees to a large clearing with cut logs and lawn chairs scattered around an enormous fire pit that was roaring with twenty-foot flames. Music blared from someone's stereo, and while some danced, many of the wolves were just hanging out and talking. The weekly Sunday night bonfires, alternating between Jake's place and Jason's father's place, were a way for the wolves to connect and enjoy each other's company on somewhat neutral territory. Wolves were extremely social creatures and they craved being around other wolves.
The hum of voices went oddly quiet when she and Chris walked into the clearing holding hands, and she didn't really understand it, but then again she didn't understand a lot of what was going on the last couple of days. It was like the whole town had been transported into the Twilight Zone. Chris tugged her towards the band and an open cooler and handed her a bottle of Irish Red, which happened to be her favorite beer. She looked down at it and up at him and he was grinning, very pleased with himself. "You're very observant tonight." She said, twisting off the cap and taking a drink.
"Yeah, well, it's about time someone started observing things around here." He cast his voice around her, like he wasn't really talking to her, and her ears picked up the angry whispered voices from the other side of the fire. She had a feeling that Jason was pissed off, a lot of the male wolves from his pack were, but she couldn't actually hear what they said. Once again, she still no clue why. He had Callie after all, and that little reminder made her grimace and until she could get back to neutral face, she took a long drink of beer.
Planning to ignore Jason's pack for the night, she stayed very close to Chris, enjoying the way it was easy to be with him and the pack that she was most close to. Chris finally reminded her that she had promised to dance if he shaved, which he had so clearly done, expertly he added, and tugged her to the side of the bonfire while Brett and the rest of the guys in the band grabbed the females hanging around, and followed them, all of them dancing together. She had forgotten what a good dancer he was, but most wolves were. It was easy to be coordinated and naturally rhythmic when you had an animal inside you.
While she tried her best to have a good time, several things bothered her. First, she could feel Jason's eyes, not to mention the eyes of the Tressel pack, on her back the entire time that she was with Chris. Second, every time she looked in that direction, which she tried not to do, she saw Callie's face streaked with tears and she was being comforted by several females, and was clearly standing far away from Jason. And lastly, Cadence was completely miserable. She hated Callie for taking Jason, hated Jason for abandoning her all those years ago, and hated that she was desperately lonely but couldn't even really picture being with Chris.
He was everything a girl could want: gorgeous, charming, a great job, a place of his own, and a sweet smile. He was the sort of guy that smiled at you and your knees went weak and your heart fluttered. Except that didn't happen to her with him. She liked him, she loved his family and the Garra pack, but he wasn't Jason. How could you be with someone when your heart belonged to someone else?
After a half dozen songs, when she was thoroughly turned on just from all the grinding Chris was doing, not to mention the vibes from the other wolves as they danced, she was pulled back to the house, Chris with his arm around her and the band tight behind them. The suggestion that they were going to jam a little was like literal music to her ears. Years ago, when they first discovered she could sing, they used to spend time jamming during the bonfires, singing radio songs while the guys played their acoustic instruments. It was some of the happiest times in her life, even though she'd always wished that Jason would share it with her, not stand on the outside and glare at her disapprovingly.
Chris took the easy chair that was adjacent to the couch, pulling his Fender Malibu acoustic from the case that had appeared out of nowhere. She sat on the edge of the couch that was next to him, tucking one leg under the other. The Garra pack started to filter into the house, Renee's eyes shining with happiness but a grimace on Jake's face that didn't mesh with what had always been a fun time. After a quick tune up and some light bantering, they played and she sang, with Chris accompanying her. Her range was big, both soprano and alto, and Chris had a tenor that matched nearly perfectly. They sang and played for hours, and she was able to really lose herself in the music and the sense of family that the pack gave to her. It was the first time, in a very long time, that she felt like she truly belonged. Jason's pack, the females all resented her, except for Callie and of course the mated ones. But the ones that were her age or older made her feel like she was some kind of horrible creature, brought from the bowels of hell to torment them. Jake's pack was different though, and maybe Chris was right. Jake was alpha and married, so the females weren't fighting for the coveted position, not wary of every female that walked by.
When their collective voices were trashed, Chris put his guitar away and stood up and held his hand out to her, pulling her gently up. Renee gave her a hug on their way out the door and said, "We should go to lunch this week, honey."
"I'd like that."
"Good, I'll get some of the girls together, how about tomorrow at Lonestar's at 1?"
Cadence agreed, looking forward to it. It would be nice to have a girls day. Chris was telling her how amazing she sounded, and how much he enjoyed singing with her, when the rush of footsteps sounded suddenly and Chris moved her behind him protectively. It was an instinctual response on his part, but it warmed her just the same. Callie, with Michael hot on her heels, had come storming around the house and Cadence could see Jason on the front porch, arms folded and an angry expression slashed across his features.
"Cadence, please, don't leave. Please talk to me." Callie breathed, fresh tears on her cheeks. Callie was not acting like herself; Cadence had never seen her cry so much publicly. She was like Cadence, more a suffer silently in public and go berserk in private.
Cadence would have hugged her, called her an idiot and told her that she loved her. But she couldn't get the image of Callie and Jason out of her head even though her brain was the one that put it there in the first place. She thought it might haunt her forever. Shaking her head at Callie, Cadence pulled Chris backwards towards the truck. He shut her in the passenger seat while Michael put his arm around Callie and she sobbed into his shoulder. Cadence shut her eyes against the ache of tears that pressed as they pulled away.
"Are you okay?" He picked up her hand and kissed the top of it.
"I don't know. Have you ever felt like everyone was keeping something from you, but they expected you to figure it out without any help whatsoever?"
"No. Sorry." He laughed and it made her laugh and she had to brush away the tears that fell when her guard was let down. He pulled her against him in a hug with one arm and kissed the top of her head. "Sweetheart, there's not some enormous conspiracy about you. If you think about it, the single males are treating you the way that they're supposed to, and the females are, too, because they see you as a romantic rival."
"But I'm not pack, you said so yourself."
"No, but you're as close as possible. Didn't you have fun tonight?"
"Of course."
"Doesn't the Garra pack treat
you better than the Tressel pack?"
"Yeah." Why was that, anyhow?
As if he could read her mind he said, "It's because the alpha is married, honey. I mean the females in my pack aren't crazy about you, they're not crazy about any single females, but the coveted position isn't available so they aren't fighting. Couldn't you feel the difference between the two packs?"
"I just thought it was because your dad has always watched out for me."
"Well, so has the other pack, but it's not quite the same. Watching your back for trouble is not the same as dealing with the females when they want to shag the single alpha."
"He's not single anymore, though, he's got Callie."
"Nothing is official until its official, so until things are final the pack will be at each other's throats. You don't have to worry about that with my pack, though."
"Oh, your pack?"
He laughed. He had a great laugh. Why hadn't she noticed that before? "Yeah, it will be eventually."
He followed her up the front porch and waited while she unlocked the door. He towered over her, he always had, but now he seemed even more imposing, and perhaps it was because he was slowly closing the distance between them. His hand tilted her face up to meet his, and she closed her eyes and their lips met, just the barest brush of his skin against hers while her heart pounded in her ears.
Pulling back suddenly she let out a small gasp and he brushed the back of his hand against her cheek. "You're very special, Cadence. If I rushed you, I'm sorry. I'd like to call you tomorrow, if that's cool?"
She nodded, biting her bottom lip to stop from crying suddenly, even as she was unsure where the well of emotions was coming from. She went in the house, shutting and locking the door and leaning against it. When she heard his truck pull away, she let herself cry and then she screamed a nice, primal scream at the unfairness of the situation. Chris was great, everything a girl could want, except he wasn't Jason. Chris wouldn't want her in the long run, because she wasn't sure that she could give him more than half of her heart, and what man in his right mind would settle for that?
The next day, she was putting her favorite Winnie the Pooh watch on when there was a knock at the front door. She wasn't expecting company; she was supposed to meet Renee and the girls at Lonestar's. Michael was standing in the doorway when she pulled the front door open. He looked tired and unhappy. "What's up?" She said, leaving the door open and reaching for her keys.
He followed her down the porch steps once she locked up. "What was the deal last night?"
"About what are you referring to specifically?" She leaned against the car door.
He narrowed his eyes. "Don't bullshit a bullshitter, Cadence. All of it. You showed up with Chris like you two are together now. Are you?"
"What do you care?"
"I care," he ground out, "because Chris is next in line for alpha of their pack."
"And?" Annoyance dripped from the word.
"And, fuck it, Cadence." He growled. "You're my friend. My best girl friend and I think you need to rethink your choices."
Growling, she threw up her hands, "Choices, choices. Everyone's talking about choices, but so far there's only one choice that's had the balls to make himself known to me and I couldn't be more surprised that it's Chris, but it's nice. Their pack, Michael, their pack doesn't treat me like some runt trying to get to the food dish. And I can't help it if the females in your pack don't like me, but it doesn't mean I have to tolerate it. And it won't matter eventually anyhow."
He grabbed her arm to stop her from getting into the car. "What do you mean it won't matter eventually?"
"I mean, when Jason and Callie declare themselves as mates or however the hell that happens."
He looked like she'd hit him with something heavy. "You think Jason and Callie are together? Mates?"
"They are. I saw them in his office."
He gave her wide eyes and then burst out laughing. "Holy shit. You really do think that, don't you? Callie's been frantic trying to talk to you, but I had no idea that's what you were pissed about. You ran out of the shop so fast I thought that my brother was just being his usual dick-self and pissed you off. But that's it, isn't it? You're jealous."
"Fuck you, I'm not jealous." She seethed.
"You should be green." He snickered and she threw a punch at him, which he narrowly dodged. "See? You just proved my point. Get your head out of your ass and go talk to Jason. You need to talk to him, Cadence. It's important."
"Even if he's not with Callie, he's an asshole." Her heart was shouting for joy at the news that she'd misread the situation between him and Callie, but that didn't change how much he'd hurt her before that. "I need to go." She pushed him away from the door and sat down, shutting it and turning on the car. He leaned in the open window, resting his chin on his arms. "Cadence, please do me a favor. Talk to Callie. She is really hurting because she thinks you hate her. There's nothing going on between them, I swear. You're her best friend, her only ally in the pack. She's like completely lost without you. And you really should come into the shop, I think you've spent enough time around Jake's pack, you need to hang with us."
Without another word, she pushed him away from the window and took off for the restaurant. She cranked up the stereo so she didn't have the ability to think about anything except the lyrics to Foxy Lady.
For a Monday at lunchtime, Lonestar’s was pretty deserted. She parked next to Renee’s navy blue Taurus and turned the volume down and then turned off the engine. For a long moment, she sat in the car and just breathed. She let herself rejoice in her head that Callie and Jason weren’t together even though she wasn’t sure it really changed anything.
She was wearing a soft sweater dress that hit about mid-thigh and was slouchy and very adorable, if she did say so herself, with black suede over the knee boots and a headband pushing her hair back. Renee had gathered a group of females Cadence's age from their pack, of which there were only five, but she knew them from school. They all seemed genuinely happy to see her, happy to talk to her, and included her in their plans for the weekend which involved going to the next town up to a club and hanging out. "Jake said you should go, honey. Take Friday off, I'll even make him pay you. You deserve a fun night out." Renee said and she agreed. She did need a fun night out.
Grey came over and kissed Renee on the cheek when he brought back her change from paying for the meal. He glanced at Cadence and said, "I got a call from the garage, Cadence. Jason has asked if you would stop by and see him."
"I'm busy. But thanks for the message."
They were standing to leave and all the girls looked at her in shock. When she asked what the problem was, Renee said, "Whether you like him or not, honey, he is alpha of the other pack and that carries weight with it. I know you guys have a, strained relationship, but that doesn't mean you should be outright rude or disrespectful to him."
She shook her head in disbelief. "I can't make anyone happy, can I? It fucking boggles the mind." Cadence gave Renee a hug and thanked her for lunch, and said goodbye the other girls.
She debated going to the garage. She could hear him out, play nice, but she didn't want to. She didn't want him to see that she was relieved that he wasn't with Callie. There was no doubt in her mind that Michael had told him everything and she'd look like a twittering teenager again, chasing after him, desperate for a kind word or touch. She'd cried over him so much when she was young, had shed so many tears that her pillow had saltwater stains all over it. Grinding her teeth together, she told her heart in no uncertain terms that she was not going to show Jason a bit of emotion. She could not let herself get built up to such ridiculous heights over him again. She would not spend the nights staring at the phone, praying for it to ring.
She. Just. Would. Not.
With a sigh, she turned out of the parking lot towards the garage.
Chapter 4
It wasn't often that Jason waited expectantly for something, but he'd been waiting for over a baker's
dozen of years for Cadence and he thought he might explode now, finally. He shifted the old office chair back and forth with his foot absently while he waited to see if she would show up to see him or not. She was stubborn enough to not show up at all, or to show up and tell him to go fuck himself and leave without hearing what he had to say, but somehow he didn't think she'd show up just to hear him out.
And just what could he say, anyhow? He had a plan to get close to her again, to romance her, but he wasn't sure if a little over three weeks was long enough. Damn it, damn it, damn it! He heard the sound of her Charger and he suddenly felt nervous. He could pick out the engine of her car anywhere, just like he could single out her voice or scent in a crowd. He'd sent Michael over to talk to her, because he didn't understand what had happened at the bonfire. She always hung out with the Tressel pack. Even when she hated him, she never left Callie's side, or Michael's for that matter. While he hated her friendship with his brother because he was denied it now by his own hand, he had always loved that she was there with them, part of their pack. But Chris, this thing with Chris was a complication. She hadn't been in town four days, and Chris had practically mounted her in the bar Friday night and had blatantly suggested it, to which she's teased him. And then he'd put his hands on her bare skin in front of the whole damn bar on the stage.
Jason ran his hand down his face. Michael said she was jealous, that she thought he and Callie were together. Absurd female. As if he would take Callie over her, his sweet perfection? Was she on drugs?
"That she's jealous means she still loves me, right?" He had asked Michael.
"Hell if I know, man. She tried to punch me, though." Michael grinned at him. "I feel like I don't know her anymore, man, she's completely torn up inside. I think you drove her insane."