by R. E. Butler
His family would be hers, the pack would take her in as one of their own, and he’d have what he’d craved since he first knew they were mates. He just wanted her. All her ups. All her downs. He wanted her hand in his firmly and her heart forever. No small order, but it finally felt like things were shifting his way.
Chapter 7
Waking up with the alarm on Tuesday morning, Cadence grumbled and hit the snooze and rolled over. She hadn’t slept well. It wasn’t the teenager that had been sniffing around, it was everything that happened after that. Something stirred in her from the pack meeting, and it wasn’t just all that talk about mate marking. She felt like a part of her had belonged there with the pack. And not because she was friends with them, but because they were looking at her like she was one of them.
All night, her mind had been working in overdrive, sorting through the past and trying to mesh up jumbled images and fuzzy memories. She’d get her head wrapped around something and another piece would come unraveled. Where’s that 20/20 hindsight she'd heard so much about?
When the snooze went off for the fourth time, and she hadn’t managed to do anything but become more annoyed at the sound of the alarm, she got up and showered. She would seriously need a gallon of coffee.
While she dried her hair, she bent over slightly, and caught a flash of a white mark on her neck. Pausing, she touched the four scars that she'd had as long as she could remember. She could feel them, slightly rougher and warmer than the surrounding skin but virtually unnoticeable against her fair coloring except when her light summer sun-kissed skin kicked in. Only one person had ever asked her about them besides her father, and it had been one of her roommates in college. Cadence told her what she knew to be the truth, except it had come out of her mouth like tacks, as if she were purposely lying and the truth was waiting to be set free.
“I fell into a rosebush and got cut on the thorns,” she told her. Gretchen. Snotty attitude, typical campus slut. She had looked disappointed, like she thought the story should have been better, and it was the first time that Cadence gave them any serious thought.
Until now. She clucked at herself in the mirror. Those marks seemed awfully familiar and meaningful. She finished drying her hair, dressed for work and drove in. She made coffee and watched the pot, which made it seem to drip slower. Perhaps, like pots of water waiting to boil, watched coffee pots didn’t drip.
“Hey baby girl.” Michael sidled up to the counter and looked expectantly at the coffee.
“Hey Michael. What’s doing?”
“Nada. Boss is cracking my ass to finish the engine overhaul on that Chevy out back.”
“He’s a real slave driver.” She gave him a wink and he grinned. “Hey, can I ask you something about wolves?”
He looked pleasantly surprised. “Of course. My vast knowledge of everything is at your disposal.”
She snorted. What a dink. “With the thing with Casper and his girl, was there more to it than the, you know, biting?” She made a gesture to her neck as if he wouldn’t know what she was talking about.
“You mean, how does it all go down?”
“Yeah.” She shrugged as if she was just asking for conversation’s sake, except that wasn’t the case. She had marks. She had marks. Didn’t she? All she could see of Casper’s skin was hickey-like bruises and teeth marks, but not four marks like hers.
“Well, it depends on the wolves. You know the story of my folks?” She nodded. “Yeah, well, most of the time there’s a public announcement, what they call a public marking. And then there’s a private one, which is the one with teeth. But a real marking, doll, is just one mark, over the spine with the fangs. The rest of Casper’s bruise-job was because they were having sex, too.”
Her face lit with blush. She was no prude, but she liked bedroom things to be private. Michael enjoyed her embarrassment and she knew he’d say something ridiculous and make it worse so she saved him the trouble. “You ever marked anyone?”
He barked out a laugh. “Do I look married?”
“Married?”
“Yeah. I mean it’s not like rough sex, okay? It’s not about pain for pleasure’s sake or any of that good stuff. It’s an I’m yours, you’re mine sort of thing. It’s for bonding. And mate bonding is for life.”
The front door rang and he said, “Oops, Jason’s here. I gotta jam before he’s got my hide tacked to his wall. Later.” He snaked the coffee pot out and filled his cup before darting off.
On auto-pilot, Cadence went through the motions of filling up her coffee mug and passed Jason in the hall before shutting the door to her office and trying to get her head together. He’d smiled and said good morning, but there was nothing more than that in his eyes. Now last night, she’d been positive he would have kissed her if she'd waited him out, and she didn’t want that. Well, she damn well did want that a lot, but she wanted some space first. A good night’s sleep was in order, but it turns out she didn’t get one. What she would have liked better than going to bed alone, was having someone to talk to. She considered calling Jason a hundred times. And Chris. But something wasn’t sitting right with her, and that feeling she had when she first got to town, that everyone knew something about her and wasn’t telling her, reared its head. She tried to tamp it down, but it stayed put like that, until she had to get out of the office and take a walk.
When she got back from lunch, Jason was at the front counter. “Hey. I was going to offer to take you to Lonestar’s but you disappeared. Everything okay?”
“Yeah. I just wanted to get some fresh air. Maybe tomorrow?”
He nodded, “Sure thing.”
When work was done, she said goodnight to him, while he was buried up to his elbows in grease and he flashed her a sweet smile that made his one dimple even deeper and she went home. To the empty house. There was something wildly unsatisfying about cooking dinner for herself after just the night before having a houseful of rambunctious wolves. And damn it, she’d forgotten to hit the grocery store on the way home, so she was rocking a box of powdered mac and cheese and nothing else.
Chris called about seven, when she was flipping through channel after channel and thinking she should have gotten the movie channels when she paid for the satellite service. He asked her to go out to dinner on Wednesday. She hesitated, because if she was going to eat a big lunch with Jason tomorrow, then dinner would be out, so she suggested Thursday instead, and when she hung up, she felt unsettled. Oddly, her head was telling her that she was cheating, that Chris wasn’t right for her. Giving up on the TV, she went to bed, muzzling the voice in her head.
Jason didn’t even look at the menu when they sat down for lunch. Cadence did, just to have something to do. They’d both grown up eating at the restaurant because it was the only one in town, and since Grey took over, there hadn’t been any changes to the menu. It was all typical southern meat and potatoes stuff. Her father had been a good chef, but not a particularly creative one. His culinary skills were just about his only redeeming quality. Of the handful of decent memories she had of him, they all revolved around food. Him teaching her how to make something, or the one birthday he didn’t ignore when he made waffles as big as dinner plates and drew smiley faces on them with syrup.
She realized that Jason was talking. “I’m sorry, Jas, what did you say?”
“I asked what you’re thinking about so seriously?”
She made a face. “My father.”
He made a face and it made her chuckle, sadly. No one liked her father. But he must have had some redeeming qualities if her mother had married him.
And then he said something that surprised her. “I don’t really remember much about him or your mom from that time because I was so young. She hung out with Renee, because they were so close. But we were neighbors, and I do remember that they used to do cookouts for both packs, like we do now, except they’d take one of the Saturdays and another from my father’s pack would take another one, so that it wasn’t always back and forth betw
een my dad’s and Jake’s. She was in Jake’s pack of course, but, from what I remember even back then, it was strained with your dad. I think he was like Linus’ ex-wife. A part of him was excited by the wolf part of your mother, but for the most part he wanted the human life and didn’t want her pulled towards the pack and away from him.”
Before she could say anything, one of the waitresses took their order, and when they were alone he continued, “I think it’s harder for the mixed relationships, when one of the couple isn’t part of the pack. Linus made the mistake of marrying a woman that was only in it because she was hot for his wolf, but when the glow faded and he had responsibilities that he couldn’t walk away from, then that was it for her. Sometimes the pack has to come first. I don’t think your folks were married all that long before she was taken. He’d just started the restaurant, and I do remember overhearing my dad and Jake talk about buying the restaurant from him, but he wouldn’t sell. Maybe he stuck it out because he knew you would need the pack someday.”
The thought of her father doing something unselfish like that for her sat about as right as a hand on a hot stove. “That’s a nice thought, but I don’t think he stayed here for me. I don’t think he…gave me much thought at all.” She cleared her throat at the sudden lump and looked away. Jason looked so caring and thoughtful at that moment, that all she could think about doing was climbing into his lap and letting him hold her.
She liked to be in control. She spent her childhood not letting her father know that he could hurt her emotionally by poking at the part of her that wasn’t human. To do that she’d gotten very good at shuttering her emotions so that her face was blank, neutral. But Jason’s very blue eyes were following her like a laser and it was all she could do right then not to fall apart.
“You know what? I think it would be nice if you wanted to host a bonfire one of these weekends. Your property is plenty big.” He changed the topic so smoothly that she almost cried in relief at the weight that was shifted off her shoulders. “One of the ones in November, this weekend is too close, and next week is the full moon so the, you know, the whole thing is different.”
While they waited for their food, he talked animatedly about the bonfires and their history. Originally they’d been set up to bring the packs together on the full moon only. It was the alphas before Jake and Peter had taken over that thought of it, because both packs were small and could help keep each other safe. It had grown from there over the years.
When their food arrived, his four plates to her one, they ate in a comfortable silence for a several minutes.
“I got a catalog in for stereos. After lunch, I’ll bring it to your office and you can pick out what you want.” His fingers were glistening with French fry grease and all sorts of wicked little thoughts traipsed through her head.
She took her time chewing the bite of fettuccine alfredo so that she didn’t ask him to let her lick his fingers, and when she was confident that she wasn’t going to embarrass herself, she said, “I don’t need you to do that now. It can wait.”
“It was part of our deal. Why would it wait?”
“Because it’s not necessary. You finished that bike yesterday, and when his check clears then we’ll be okay, but, don’t do that to the business for my sake.”
“I wasn’t planning to pay for it from the garage.”
Oh. Oops. “Okay. I’m sorry if I offended you.”
“I’m not that easily wounded, Cades. Give me a little credit.” He rolled his luscious blue eyes and smirked and she fell in love with him a little bit more, if that were possible.
The rest of the meal was nice. More than nice, it was everything she’d ever wanted from him. The Jason that she remembered when she was young, before he shifted into his wolf form, was sitting right in front of her and it was like being transported back in time. Back at the office, they talked about stereos and he gave her his suggestions, along with making fun of her taste in music, and she picked one that had a GPS screen and would sync with her iPod.
When she checked out for the night, he looked up over the seat of the bike he had just started taking apart. “Can I take you to dinner tomorrow night?”
She must have frowned while she thought of what to say, because he stood up. “What’s wrong?”
“I made plans with Chris for tomorrow.”
His features shifted from smiling to pissed off in seconds, and the cords of his neck tensed as he twisted the wrench in his hand. And then just as quickly as he’d gotten pissed, his face went suddenly blank, calm as if he were trying too hard to be calm because he wasn’t. “Goodnight, Cadence.” She could have shivered from the ice in his tone.
“Night, Jas.” Confused at the abrupt change from him, she went home. Alone. Again. What did she expect? Something. Anything. Anything was better than no response and a cold front.
She couldn’t sleep. The sheets were rough, the bed lumpy, and her hand kept reaching for her cell to call Jason and apologize for having a date, and to call Chris and cancel, and to open the window and scream at the sky for no good reason. Did Jason want to date her? Like date her? Was this about the marks on her neck? What was everyone hiding from her?
Her eyes were ringed with purple and red from lack of sleep when she got to work on Thursday, and clearly as a result of her pending date with Chris, Jason had retreated back to himself again, barking angrily at everyone. Michael gave her sad eyes when he made the lunch run, and she fought an internal battle over what to do. Time won, whether fortunate or not, and suddenly it was too late to cancel.
Chris appeared at her doorstep at 6, dressed casually in khakis and a soft white sweater. He looked like he’d stepped fresh from a photo shoot and her first thought was that he really just didn’t do it for her. Handsome? Check. Funny? Check. Sexy? You bet. More than just a friend? Not hardly.
He drove them to a small, intimate Italian restaurant a few towns over and they talked over one of those red glass candle holders that you see in all the Italian restaurants in movies. As if any other sort of holder just wasn’t authentic. She'd never been to Italy, so maybe it was very authentic, or maybe they think Americans are idiots. The chicken parmesan was passable, made more so by the half decent bottle of wine he ordered. She was not much for drinking. But she liked a good Melon Ball or a Seabreeze and she didn't pretend to know anything about wine. If it tasted good, then she didn't much care what name was on the label. Give her a bottle of Two Buck Chuck any day.
“So I thought we could make an appearance at the bonfire on Sunday and then catch a movie. Brett and his current chew toy are doing the dating thing for now.” He laughed but she didn’t find it funny at all. Brett had a reputation for being a screw ‘em and leave ‘em sort with the human females that hung around the packs.
“He must think something of her if he’s planning to take her on a date,” She pointed out. The whole dinner sat hard in her stomach, souring.
“Nah.” He leaned back in the booth and slung his arm up. “Don’t feel sorry for her, Cadence, she knows what she’s getting into. If she really wanted to have a relationship with a wolf, she wouldn’t act the way she did in the first place. And she definitely shouldn’t try for something with my brother.”
Probably. She rubbed the space between her eyes with her thumb for a minute. “It’s not my business, anyway. Brett always was a player.”
“Can’t play forever,” he said. That sounded ominous.
She hummed in her throat and turned down dessert, ready to put a fork in the evening. The conversation had gotten heavy and she wanted to go home. The kiss at the door was nice. Chris could kiss, that was for sure. The thought that he had probably kissed and screwed his way through the bar chew toys, not to mention the females in Jake’s pack, made her uneasy and it also made her think about Jason. How many girls had he kissed? Had he ever taken a female on the full moon? If she’d been unhappy before those thoughts, she was riotously miserable after they crashed around in her brain like errant trains.
Saturday afternoon, the wolves got together for a game of football at Jake’s house. She was not planning to play, although she was wearing her NKU jersey, but Callie grabbed her hand and claimed her for Jason's pack. Cadence caught the pleased look that Jason shot to Callie, and the annoyed look on Chris’ face. Before she could think on it, Callie pulled her into the thick of the game.
Callie stayed with her, out of the way of the more serious boys as they tackled each other in an effort to get the ball. It seemed that it was a lot less about the game than about letting loose some testosterone and aggression. The rest of both packs watched, Jake and Renee barbecuing for everyone, which was no small feat. Callie suggested that they get involved and she shoved Cadence with one hand towards the goal line and ran to snag the ball. Cadence took off, splitting away from her, and she heard Callie yell her name and turned as she ran and caught the ball that Callie threw. She barely cleared one of Jake's pack as he tried to get the ball back. She saw Chris race towards her and laughed and threw the ball to Michael, but Chris tackled her anyhow, bracing her carefully so the tumble to the ground didn't hurt. Flat on her back and laughing while she tried to catch her breath, he kept himself above her with straightened arms and a huge grin on his face. A second later, Jason slammed into him, taking both of them a few yards away where they hit the ground and began swinging.
She was surprised at first, because she hadn't been paying attention to Jason, but then she wasn't surprised at all. It was just one more strange thing that she couldn’t explain. Callie and Michael appeared next to her, and Michael held out his hand, helping her to her feet. "It was bound to happen eventually." Michael shrugged, pulling her further back away from where they were trying to tear each apart.