Over Shannon’s giggles and Gina’s silent clapping, she heard his voice.
“It’s Jake,” he said, his voice gentle, filling her with anticipation.
“How are you?” she asked, taking the phone into the family room, her spirits lifting.
“I’m fine. I’m concerned about you.”
Andrea steadied the phone against her shoulder as she settled onto the sofa. “I’m doing much better. Chloe finally confessed that she was with Stuart and Eric. Between the paint chips and Chloe’s testimony, Stuart will face criminal charges.”
“Finally. What a relief.”
“No kidding,” she said, waiting for Jake to make some sort of personal comment, something that would restart their last conversation that had ended so badly. “Kyle and Shannon can now get their lives back.”
“I’m so glad to hear that,” he said, but he still didn’t follow up with anything personal, making her feel so alone...so exposed.
“Shannon and Chloe are finally on speaking terms, which is good,” she continued.
“Did you get the notification the principal sent home to the parents? I guess he also sent an email to the students,” Jake said.
“What about?”
“Mr. Hanson wants to hold an assembly in the school auditorium to talk about bullying. I called him to see if I could be of any help in organizing it.”
“Hold on for a minute,” Andrea said, placing her hand over the receiver as she went back into the kitchen. “Does anyone here know about an email sent around to the students about an assembly on bullying?”
Shannon looked surprised for a minute but recovered quickly. “Yes. I wanted to talk about that. I’ve been asked to speak at the assembly. I meant to tell you, but so much has been happening...”
“I’ve been working all day, but I wanted to see you. Can I come over for a few minutes?”
Caught between her excitement at the prospect of seeing Jake and her concern over Shannon’s role in the assembly, she hesitated... Her desire to see Jake made the decision for her. “That would be...great.”
She and Gina settled in with a cup of coffee while Chloe and Shannon waited in the family room, huddled together and talking in low tones. They had just finished their coffee when Jake arrived.
“I’ve been wanting to see you all week,” he said, his eyes alight as he kissed Andrea’s cheek.
Her body tingling with pleasure, she whispered, “There’s a conspiracy going on. Shannon is matchmaking, so behave yourself.”
“Do I have to?” he asked, his tone teasing and familiar.
“For now, at least,” she said, leading the way to the kitchen, so happy she wanted to dance all the way down the hall.
“The cavalry has arrived,” Gina chirped.
“Don’t know about that.” Jake waved to Shannon and Chloe, who rushed into the kitchen.
“I’m so glad you’re here,” Shannon said, coming to stand next to him. “You’ve got to talk to my mom. She’s got that look on, the one that says she’s about to nix my plan to speak at the school assembly.”
“I’m not going to nix it. I want to talk it over so we know what you’re getting yourself into,” Andrea said.
Jake settled in at the table, waving off an offer of coffee from Gina. “This is a huge step, Shannon. You’ll have to tell them why you were being bullied. And your coming out might elicit different reactions from your classmates, some good, and possibly some not so good. Do you feel you can face that?” he asked.
There was a short silence as the four of them exchanged glances. Shannon spoke first. “I know it will be hard, but Kyle and I talked it over. If I don’t speak out about what I experienced, it will mean that other people like me will be bullied.”
“Do you really believe that will stop the bullies, Jake?” Andrea asked, fearful at the thought that speaking out might escalate the violence.
He met her questioning gaze head-on. “No one can say for sure, but Shannon’s actions may offer the opportunity for other students to speak out.”
“I’m afraid for my daughter,” she said honestly.
“A natural feeling,” he said hurriedly, covering her hand with his.
His touch felt so right, so needed. Her eyes met his. It was as if the room was empty except for his smile. “I’m so glad you’re here,” she said, her heart awash in need for this man.
“I am, too.”
“Mom, can we get back to the subject at hand?” Shannon asked. “Am I going to speak at the assembly?”
“Are you sure you want to?” Andrea asked, pulling her gaze from Jake’s.
“Yes. I can make a difference. I’m tired of feeling like I don’t have a voice.”
Andrea’s anxious feelings tugged at her. She wanted to caution her daughter, to encourage her to think long and hard about the possible repercussions of speaking out. But Shannon’s expression made her realize that her only choice was to support her brave, caring daughter. “You do what you need to do. I’ll be there for you.”
Shannon threw her arms around Andrea’s shoulders and hugged her tight. “You’re the best mom in the world,” Shannon gushed.
“Glad that’s settled,” Gina said. “Is this where I say ‘I told you so’?”
“That things would work out, you mean?”
“Exactly.” Gina’s smug smile said it all.
Jake went over the details of the assembly. As he spoke, Andrea watched his face and wished that they were alone together. She wanted him in her life. He made her feel that she was finally home, somehow at ease with who she was.
When Jake was finished, he rose. “I have to get back to the office and finish up some paperwork.”
“I’ll walk you to the door,” Andrea said, hoping he’d kiss her again—this time on the lips.
As he opened the front door, he turned and pulled her into his arms. “I’ve missed you, us, being close to each other.”
“Me, too” was all she could manage before he kissed her. A kiss that left her pressed to him, her body eager for his touch.
He smiled into her eyes. “I really have to go, but if I didn’t...”
She got the message. Giddy with excitement, she gave him a gentle push. “We’ll talk later when you’ve finished your day.”
“Count on it,” he said, kissing her quickly one more time before heading out the door. She watched him leave, her heart brimming with anticipation.
“So, you got a hot date?” Gina inquired, smiling mischievously when Andrea came back into the kitchen.
“Maybe...” She crossed her fingers.
“Mom, you gotta start getting a social life.”
“This from the daughter who not so long ago was upset about me going fishing with Jake?” Andrea asked.
Shannon shrugged and gave her mother a jaunty grin. “So I made a mistake.”
Hugging her daughter close, Andrea knew that whatever happened in the coming days, she was ready for it. She had Gina and Jake in her life and a brave daughter, who just might make a difference to a group of students trying to figure out what being teenager was all about. “Why don’t I make us something to eat?”
“I’m with you,” Gina said.
“Well, I don’t want to be left out, so count me in.” Shannon held the fridge door open. “We could always have scrambled eggs, leftovers, spaghetti sauce on something.” She opened the freezer. “Or what about we nuke the hamburger casserole and make a salad?”
Andrea felt a rush of love for her daughter so powerful she clutched the edge of the counter. The past few weeks had shown her so much about her daughter she hadn’t known, and all of it renewed her belief that Shannon was a wonderful, caring human being. “Let’s have the casserole.”
“I wonder if many people will show up at the assembly
,” Chloe said.
“The email said the entire school—teachers and students—is expected to attend,” Shannon said, digging rolls out of the freezer and popping them into the convection oven.
“I hope the parents come to hear what the school has to say. It would do everyone good to be more aware.”
“It’s Monday afternoon, right?” Chloe asked.
“Yeah,” Shannon said. “I’m going to focus more on the bullying part rather than the reason. Sure, I’ll tell them about me and who I am, but the most important part is that people recognize when they’re being bullied, or that their friend is being bullied, and do something about it.”
As Andrea cut up tomatoes, radishes and green peppers, she wondered what it would have been like for her if she’d been well-informed on bullying when she was Shannon’s age. Would she have seen Scott’s behavior differently, rather than blaming herself for the problems in her marriage?
“Kyle’s going to help me prepare what I’m going to say,” Shannon said, setting the table.
“Are you two always in touch? What would you and Kyle do without cell phones?” Andrea asked.
“Move in together? You could adopt him or his mother could adopt me,” she said, giving her mother a cheeky grin. “I’m going to call Gram. She’ll want to know what going on around here. Maybe she’d like to come.”
“Maybe she’d like to hear her granddaughter tell her story. Have you come out to her?” Andrea asked, not wanting her mother to be blindsided by such a personal revelation from anyone other than Shannon or her.
Shannon nodded as she crunched on a celery stick. “One day when I went over to walk Butch, we had a chat.”
Andrea had talked to her mother yesterday, and Carrie hadn’t mentioned anything about Shannon. “How did she take it?”
“She seemed okay. She wanted to know if I had someone special in my life.”
“And do you?” Andrea asked.
“No. No time for that at the moment.”
“I’m going to call her in a little while to arrange to take her to her next doctor’s appointment. Do you want to talk to her after I do?”
“Sure. I’m going to invite Butch over for the weekend. Poor dog misses me,” Shannon said, a twinkle in her eye.
CHAPTER TWENTY
JAKE PLANNED TO attend this afternoon’s assembly at the high school mostly to be there for Andrea and Shannon. He also wanted to support the school’s initiative in talking to students and parents about bullying. His clinical experience had shown him how devastating bullying could be on vulnerable young people.
He admired Shannon for being willing to speak out, to share what she went through with her classmates. He had liked Shannon since the day he’d interviewed her for the arbitration, although he now regretted his recommendation.
But what had taken him so completely by surprise was Andrea’s willingness to support her daughter in all this. A few weeks ago he would have expected her to insist that Shannon not speak out. The Andrea Taylor he’d known had changed her approach to her daughter, and for that he was immensely pleased. It must have been very difficult for her to relinquish control, to let her daughter do what she felt was right.
One of the best things about going this afternoon, besides supporting Shannon and her classmates, was that he would see Andrea. He parked the car then climbed out, hoping that he might see Andrea. She was probably inside with Shannon. Entering the auditorium, he made his way up the center aisle to a seat on the end of a row about halfway to the stage. He glanced around, but the only person he recognized was a high school student who was a client of his. While he waited for the assembly to begin, he scanned the crowd, searching for Andrea.
Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Andrea, Gina and Shannon enter. The principal approached the three of them, shaking hands with Andrea and Gina while smiling encouragingly at Shannon. Jake wanted to approach them, but he was suddenly not sure if he should.
His strong feelings for Andrea had taken him by surprise. His need to accept how he felt about her forced him to face his own insecurities. He was still trying to figure out how to deal with his guilt, his deep-seated fear that, underneath everything, he hadn’t really loved his wife. Just the memory of that time in his life made his stomach churn. During those long months of grieving, he’d been plagued by the knowledge that Maria’s addiction had driven them apart, that her behavior made it harder and harder to feel any emotion other than despair and disgust. After she passed away, he’d denied those feelings. He’d been more comfortable believing he’d had a good marriage, despite their problems. But it wasn’t really true, and he was at least partly to blame.
For so long he’d struggled with the belief that he wasn’t capable of building a relationship, that keeping it superficial was the only way he could cope. When faced with the anxiety of making a commitment to Andrea, he’d let his fear of making another mistake hold him back.
Even now, as much as he wanted to be with her, he hung back, afraid that going to her would mean some sort of declaration of his feelings. He knew how stupid that sounded, how awful it made him feel, but he couldn’t seem to help it. The agony of trying to figure out his feelings—to accept that he needed someone, someone like Andrea—was intimidating.
Andrea stood on the other side of the auditorium. She met his gaze and smiled at him, a smile that filled him with joy, and suddenly he knew.
He’d been wrong. So wrong. He wanted Andrea regardless of anything else. He needed her. His life would be empty without her.
It was as if they were suspended together alone. He walked toward her, the most natural action in the world, his eyes never leaving hers.
This was right for him.
* * *
ANDREA’S STOMACH ACHED with apprehension as the principal spoke to Shannon, offering his encouragement. She and Shannon had talked late last night about what Shannon would say today, whether she’d take questions from the audience. Through their entire conversation, Andrea had not been able to release her fear for her only child. She didn’t want Shannon hurt by what others might say to her once this assembly was over. Feeling shaky and anxious, she understood why Gina had offered to drive them to the school.
She had seen Jake out of the corner of her eye when she came in, but she didn’t acknowledge him. She couldn’t. She debated whether she should offer to say something in support of her daughter at this assembly. She’d gone back and forth with the idea the entire trip here.
As she stood there, trying to decide what to do, the principal said, “Well, Shannon, I think it’s time we made our way to the backstage area. Are you ready?”
Shannon took Andrea’s hand. “Are you okay, Mom?”
Her daughter was asking about how she felt when she had to be very anxious about the next hour, about how her speech would be received. Despite Andrea’s doubts, her lack of sleep and her fear that this could backfire on Shannon, she said the only words she could. “I’m fine, sweetie. Just go up there and tell the truth about how you feel, what you’ve been through, how you’d like things to change.”
Shannon’s gaze met hers. Andrea refrained from showing any emotion except pride and confidence, knowing that Shannon would not want a big display of emotion. “I know you can do it, Shannon.”
She watched her daughter walk toward the stage with the principal before searching the room for Jake. When she found him, he was looking straight at her, a look that held her. Her heart filled with happiness. She watched as he started toward her, his eyes never leaving hers.
Jake nodded at Gina, then turned to Andrea. “How are you doing?”
“Worried. Scared for her and anxious about how people will react.”
He moved closer, sheltering her from the crowd milling around them. “I’m here for you.”
His words were just what she needed to he
ar. “I wonder if I should volunteer to speak today, to let these young people know that bullying can happen in any relationship, not just in friendships and in school situations.”
His arm went around her shoulders. “You mean you and Scott?”
She leaned into him, seeking his support and solace. “Yeah.”
“But how will that make you feel?” he asked, his arm creating a protective circle. “Are you ready to talk about this to strangers? You’ve only begun to see how it affected your own life.”
“But it’s important to speak up, to say that bullying can happen anytime at any age, in any relationship. Did you know she’s been getting ugly text messages from several of her so-called friends?”
“No, I didn’t. Can she block the number that’s sending the texts?”
“She blocked them, but they just find someone else’s number to use. But she’s doing better since Stuart was charged.”
“Would it change Stuart’s or his friends’ behavior to hear your story?”
“I’m not sure... Probably not.”
Leaning closer, Jake murmured close to her ear. “I don’t want to see you go through something like this in such a public forum. But if you feel you need to, I’ll support you.” The look of concern in his eyes made Andrea stop and reconsider.
Who was she doing this for? And what impact would it have? The students and parents had been invited here to learn what had been going on in the school, not to hear about her personal issues.
“Andrea, you have to decide for yourself. If it were me, I wouldn’t do it.”
That tipped the balance for her. This assembly wasn’t about her, and this wasn’t the place for her personal issues. How would Shannon feel hearing the private relationship between her parents broadcast to her peers? And if Andrea did speak up, wouldn’t she be undermining Shannon’s moment the same way Scott had undermined Andrea?
“I see what you’re saying. This isn’t the time.” Secretly, she was relieved not to share her story. She would have if it would help Shannon, but if she didn’t have to...
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