Samuel stared hard at him. “For Pete’s sake, Jacob, isn’t there some way to get your name cleared and stop living in fear?”
He could only wish such a thing. The room remained dead silent, and Jacob knew Samuel was reeling in anger—at him, at Rhoda, at the absurdity of a stranger who meant them no harm causing so much discontent among them.
Jacob propped his elbows on the table and rested his head in his hands. “I should’ve thought it through better yesterday morning when you were telling her not to go. I knew people would be curious, but it didn’t dawn on me she’d stir up that kind of interest. Did you suspect?”
“No.” Samuel’s anger seemed to have melted into resignation. “I just knew it didn’t feel right for her to go.”
“A blogger interested in writing about our family? How did that happen?” Jacob sighed.
Leah folded and refolded the washrag. “If neither of you thought that Rhoda might draw attention—or that doing so would be a problem—how was she supposed to know?” She pushed the rag farther onto the table. “Keep your secrets from us if you must, Jacob. But you have to share them with Rhoda.”
Samuel moved to the fireplace and rested a foot on the hearth. “You once told me you disagreed with my decision to keep my girlfriend in the dark about the problems caused by the spider mites damaging the apple trees. You thought the whole idea of being in a relationship was having someone you could share your burdens with.”
“I meant current, day-to-day things. No one tells everything from their past.”
Samuel grabbed the poker and shifted the logs. “But your past is burdening the current, day-to-day things for Rhoda and you.” He straightened and put the poker back in its place. “She needs to know.”
Jacob couldn’t stand the thought of telling her. As much as he didn’t want to lose Rhoda’s respect, far more than that was at stake. He had people to protect. Innocent lives. Casey’s life. Even Rhoda’s. The less she knew, the less responsibility she’d carry. It wasn’t fair to put the burden of his past on her. She would then have to hold back from all sorts of people, including her parents … and his.
If he did tell her, would he make her guilty of hiding from the law too?
Could he go talk to her and somehow find a way around telling her the truth?
Rhoda stood in the dark greenhouse.
Why did Jacob have to be so closed with her? He certainly wasn’t with Samuel. The two passed looks, spoke in coded messages, and seemed to communicate without saying a word. But she was on the outside, stumbling like a chump. At the least Jacob could have warned her that any outside interest might be a problem.
What trouble had he let her cause? And why?
Questions circled nonstop, and the ground itself seemed to want to pull her into it.
She had no desire to demand that Jacob unearth what he’d buried in private. If anyone understood making mistakes while trying to do what was right, she did. But whatever he’d done and why, he shouldn’t let her stumble around and make trouble for him.
Music again filtered through the air. She still couldn’t make out the instrument, but it was the same unfamiliar song she had been hearing since the day they’d arrived. The song no one else seemed to hear.
At least the voice hadn’t returned.
What was wrong with her? She could hear things that weren’t there, see people who weren’t there, but she couldn’t pick up on what was ripping at a good man?
Shadows at the far end of the greenhouse took the shape of a young Amish woman.
Emma.
Rhoda had spent two years believing she was fully responsible for Emma’s death. Jacob, in his tender-hearted but practical way of looking at things, had helped her to see otherwise. She wanted to lift some of his burden, but how could she when he wouldn’t tell her anything?
Once her eyes adjusted to the dark, Rhoda went to the large container of mulch and dug a trowel into it.
She’d grown used to Samuel’s immediate responses being gruff, but even so, he was infuriating. You should’ve stayed home like I said. Who did he think he was? If she hadn’t been determined to avoid arguing with him, she’d have straightened him out.
“Rhoda?” Jacob’s voice made warmth and peace wash over her.
She went to the door and opened it. “In here.”
He hurried toward her. “When I didn’t see the lantern glow, I thought maybe you’d gone for a walk.”
She retreated into the darkness of the greenhouse.
He had seemed so carefree when she met him. Was this what courting did—take an apparent champion and slowly reveal the beauty and pain of their humanness?
She waited, but he said nothing. “Why is it so hard to warn me of areas where your past may undermine me? Or to let me know you might disappear for a few days before doing so? Or to tell me to avoid situations like today?”
He wiped dirt off a bench and sat on it. “I don’t know.”
Was he serious? That was his answer?
“Why didn’t you say something to Samuel when he snapped at me about going today?”
“I … I don’t know.”
Frustration circled. As fantastic as he was in helping her work through arguments and anger with his brother, he seemed to have no answers when it came to sorting out their own problems. “I thought you came out here to talk to me.”
He shrugged. “I did, but …”
When he didn’t finish his sentence, annoyance stole her resolve to be gentle. “Kumm.” She headed for the door.
He hopped off the bench. “Where are we going?”
“To find Samuel. At least he’ll give me an answer. He unnerves me and angers me, and I often hate what he has to say, but he won’t give ridiculous, empty answers.” She let the door slam behind her and strode across the yard.
“Rhoda!”
“Don’t worry, Jacob.” She threw the words over her shoulder. “He won’t divulge any of your secrets.”
She flung open the back door and entered the kitchen. Samuel looked up from a calculator and a catalog.
Rhoda crossed her arms. “Why would you criticize me at dinner when it was obvious I wasn’t the source of the problem?”
He stared at her. Jacob joined them, and the two brothers exchanged knowing looks.
Samuel laid his pen on the table. “There wouldn’t be a problem concerning possible Internet articles if you had listened to me earlier. No one would be interested in us or notice us if you’d stayed here today.”
“See?” She motioned to Jacob. “That’s how it’s done. I prod. He answers. It doesn’t matter how ridiculous the answer is, it’s something to build on.” She turned back to Samuel. “And just so you know, that is the most unreasonable answer you’ve ever had. We have to live in this community, in Orchard Bend. People are going to see us and have questions. If it didn’t happen today at the seminar, it would be at the grocery store or the drugstore or the supply store.”
Both men studied her.
“Look.” She sat in a chair. “I’m sorry if I’ve stirred up any trouble. Truly, I am. But I will not carry any burden of guilt when I haven’t done anything wrong. If there’s something I shouldn’t expose by going somewhere or doing something, someone needs to warn me.” She angled her head, catching Samuel’s eyes. “Will this new haven for me so quickly become like Morgansville, where I’m seen as being wrong regardless of what I do?”
Samuel’s eyes reflected conviction. “My temper and concern got the best of me. I shouldn’t have blamed you.”
She turned to Jacob. “I need you to give me answers—right or wrong. If I ask, ‘Why don’t you trust me?’ you should say, ‘We’re not there yet’ or ‘I can’t because …’ ” She gestured toward him. “But ‘I don’t know’ isn’t an acceptable response.” She steadied her voice. “Why can’t you let me in? Am I that untrustworthy?”
“No. That’s not it at all.” Jacob rested his hand on the back of his neck, his green eyes piercing her. “You’re the
best thing that has ever happened to me. I believe in your abilities concerning the orchard, but more than that, I believe in you.” He lowered his eyes. “I’m not good at disappointing people, and once you know what I’ve done, you will be disappointed in me.”
Everything he said rang true of the gentle soul she knew. “See?” She cleared her throat. “Those are really good answers.”
He studied her, and she managed a faint smile. “It’s either now or later. There is no other option.”
“If that’s true, I would rather wait until we first have several months of fun, relaxing times.” The tremble in his voice told her how he struggled. “You need to brace yourself, because if I let you in, you may want out.”
Her hurt faded, and she ached for him. “Is guarding your past the reason you’ve not had a girlfriend before now?”
He turned. “Not at all. I’ve never been attracted to anyone before.”
Her heart flooded with warmth. “For a man who shares so little, you sure are good at saying the right things.”
Samuel got up, taking the catalog and the lantern with him. “I’ll see both of you in the morning.” He left the kitchen, the swinging door flapping behind him.
The glow of the fire radiated dimly.
“Jacob.” She motioned. “Kumm. Sit.”
He sat across from her.
“I can’t promise you I won’t want out of this courtship just as you can’t promise that to me. We’ve made no commitments beyond faithfulness to see no one else. But do you really want me to keep getting blindsided with hurt and disappointment over things I know nothing about?”
He reached both hands across the table, palms up, and she put hers into them. She waited, and the minutes ticked by.
Jacob drew a deep breath and began. “The year I graduated, when I was fourteen, I left home to apprentice carpentry under my uncle Mervin.”
“The one I met in Lancaster?”
“Ya. He taught me well, and I could’ve stayed on with him and made good money, but I was restless. I wanted to travel and spread my wings as if I hadn’t been raised Amish. For a while I traveled up the East Coast, working construction jobs anywhere near the ocean. When I landed in Virginia Beach, I worked with a construction crew that I liked. The owner of the company liked me, and his foreman took me under his wing.”
She listened in silence as he told her about Blaine, the foreman who hired him, and about Sandra, Blaine’s wife, and how the three of them became fast friends.
“Blaine was responsible for building a large subdivision, and Jones’ Construction gave him money to order supplies. I’d known him less than a week when I realized he was short of supplies on a house we were building. The money for the supplies was gone, so I helped him figure out how to borrow what he needed from various homes in the subdivision, all of them in different stages of construction. I devised a plan where the workers kept building on the other homes under contract. It was a simple plan, really.”
“I imagine so … for you.” One of the first things she had realized about Jacob was how gifted he was at any kind of math. It took her hours to figure out how many of each item she needed when canning a day’s crops. Jacob could tell her, in minutes, the exact number of Mason jars, teaspoons of seasoning, or cups of sugar.
He sandwiched her hand between his. “But even after a house closed, Blaine didn’t recoup the missing money. My plan didn’t work. I couldn’t figure out why, but I was sure I could fix the problem. Soon I had every house in flux, all of them missing certain items while I kept the construction guys working on them and the developers from realizing the supplies they’d paid for were being put into homes they weren’t assigned to.”
Rhoda frowned. “I don’t understand. If you didn’t have enough supplies, how did you keep the carpenters busy.”
“Every house had certain supplies and a few guys. That way, when the owners stopped by, it looked as if progress was being made. After the second home sold, and we still didn’t have the cash to buy back the supplies for the other homes, I realized someone was spending the money. That turned out to be Blaine. That’s when I learned he was addicted to gambling. When I talked to him about it, I also learned that what I’d been doing was illegal.”
His words echoed in Rhoda’s head. Illegal? He’d broken the law?
Jacob stared at the table, shaking his head. “Leave it to a farm boy with an eighth-grade education not to know what he was doing was illegal.”
The look on his face tugged at her. No wonder he hadn’t wanted to talk about it. He probably felt gullible, foolish.
Rhoda squeezed his hand. “I don’t agree. I’m sure there are plenty of people who wouldn’t know that. Does the law hold you accountable if you don’t know? Seems like Blaine, as the boss, would be the guilty one.”
“Maybe so … if I’d pulled away right then or gone to the authorities. But Blaine begged me not to. He said Jones’ Construction would be hit with lawsuits, and they’d go under, and every person who worked for them would lose their job. Meanwhile, Sandra was pregnant, and he’d go to jail if I didn’t help him. I cared about all those people. I loved Blaine and Skeet like brothers, or at least I thought I did.”
“Who’s Skeet?”
“One of the owners of Jones’ Construction. Blaine said he didn’t know about the borrowing from other building sites, but he’d have lost his company over it. From the day I was hired, Skeet took me under his wing like a long-lost friend. When he realized what was going on, he wanted me to help him so he wouldn’t face lawsuits and bankruptcy.”
“You continued what you were doing, even after you knew you were breaking the law?”
“I was convinced I could fix the problem if I could keep Blaine from gambling. That’s where the problem of the missing money began. So I knew that either Blaine had to be let go from his job or I’d have to stick to him like glue. If he couldn’t make the weekly payments to some loan sharks—”
“What’s a loan shark?”
“Someone who loans money to those who can’t get it anywhere else, but the interest is sky-high. And loan sharks will use violence if they aren’t paid everything they’re owed.”
“So if Blaine lost his job, then the loan sharks wouldn’t get paid.”
“Right. But I figured—”
Rhoda held up her hand. “Why were so many building supplies missing in the first place?”
“That took me awhile to figure out. It all boiled down to the fact that Blaine was a gambler. And he was a bad gambler. To cover his bets, he stole massive amounts of supplies off the job, always thinking that he’d replace them after he won big.”
“Without anyone knowing?”
“Sometimes Sandra filled in as a secretary for the construction company, and she could place orders if she had the cash to do so. It wasn’t hard for Blaine to steal the supplies. He had the keys and the equipment to move anything after dark. When I realized what he was doing, I put a stop to it. That’s when he and Sandra went to some loan sharks, still trying to win big and pay off everything they owed.”
“But you didn’t know about that part.”
“When it came to Blaine, I never seemed to know what was going on until it was too late. But a nicer, friendlier guy you’d never meet. Everybody loved him, including me.”
“So you broke the law for him?”
“I figured, how could breaking the law hurt anything if I could make it right? I just knew I could keep my friend out of jail, his wife from raising their daughter alone, my boss from going bankrupt, and my buddies from losing their jobs. But I kept getting in deeper and deeper. And then Blaine started buying inferior products, black-market stuff. Well, I think it was him. I have no proof. But he was willing to do anything to save a dollar.” Jacob moved to the end of the table and scooted his chair close to her. “Things went from bad to worse.”
“Where’s Blaine now?”
“Sandra is convinced he’s run off with his girlfriend.”
“His
what?” Nausea rolled. Jacob’s married friend had a girlfriend?
Jacob rubbed his forehead. “I can’t imagine how awful this sounds to you. But the whole mess gets darker and darker and darker. It keeps reaching out tentacles, like an octopus. Maybe it’s growing them while I sleep.”
“Where do you think Blaine is?”
He shook his head. “Let’s not talk about it.”
She pulled her hand away. “Answer me.”
“I think he missed too many payments to the loan sharks and they got tired of his excuses.”
All these years Rhoda had thought seeing and hearing things that weren’t there was dark and eerie, but her visions seemed like springtime compared to this. “You think Blaine’s been killed?”
“It’s possible.” Jacob’s grieved tone tugged at her heart.
“But it makes no sense for the people he owed to kill him. How can he give them anything if he’s dead?”
“That’s what Sandra thinks. She also believes he’s alive because he cleaned out their accounts and safe-deposit box before he disappeared. I think he cleaned them out to pay what he could toward the loans, but then something went really wrong. Maybe it wasn’t enough.”
“So why did Sandra need to move without warning?”
“Someone broke into her place and left a threatening note.”
“What?” She gawked at him.
“She borrowed from those same people too. At least that’s the only involvement she’s said she had. Sometimes I wonder what she’s not telling me, but I keep hoping I’m just paranoid about what she and Blaine were doing behind my back while I was trying to help them.”
“Why not get free of her?”
“Casey.” He stared at Rhoda, and she could see how much Casey meant to him.
“Her little girl?”
“I was there the night she was born. I even held her before Sandra did. They say babies can’t see well when they’re born, but she gazed at me as if begging me to keep her safe. I stayed for as long as I could. But when Sandra found out that I knew about Blaine’s girlfriend months before she did and I hadn’t told her, she wanted me gone. So I came back home.”
The Winnowing Season Page 17