by JL Madore
“Unanimous?” I said, my voice barely a whisper. My strength all but drained out of me. “Not one person on the Council thought me worth speaking to before they revoked my life? How is that possible?”
“I’m sick about this, sweetheart,” Castian said, crushing the scroll in his clenched fist. “I had no idea.”
I blinked back the betrayal stinging my eyes and offered what I hoped was a reassuring smile. For the first time in years, I hoped my mother had checked out mentally and had no idea what was happening in the world around her.
I wished I didn’t know.
“Let me get Mother settled. Then I’ll go. Will you explain to Abbey what happened?”
Castian nodded. “I will make this right, Zo. I swear it.”
“Zozo? Zozo?”
I woke to the panic of my mother’s voice. She stood at the center of her bed, eyes as big as saucers, her arms wrapped across her chest.
I shook myself and rubbed my eyes. “What’s wrong?”
“He was here. I smell him.”
I’d seen my mother like this before. Even centuries after he’d left us like litter in the street, Dane’s presence still got to her. I don’t know what she remembered of the past or why she hated him specifically, just that she did.
“He’s gone now. Just you, me, and Hoola make three.”
My mother stomped on the mattress, staring at the bedroom floor as if it held some unspeakable horrors. “Where is she?”
I searched the room. “Hoola? Where are you, Hoola girl?”
When no sound or call came back, my mother threw herself onto the mattress in a fit of clawed fingers and tears.
“It’s all right. I’ll find her, but you need to calm down.” I tried to catch her flailing arm, to reach her. The gemstone in her ring caught my face and blood welled hot on my lip. I hissed and recoiled. “Mom. Mom, it’s me, Zozo. I’m right here with you. Please calm down.”
But she didn’t. Or couldn’t. Maybe she couldn’t even hear me. When she got like this, she didn’t seem to recognize who I was. I wiped at the moisture on my cheeks. “Mom, please. You’re going to hurt yourself.”
When the door creaked open, I spun to block the scene from view. Aust stepped inside, Hoola snuggling in his arms. He took one look at my face, and my mother on the bed, and jogged to my side. His usual shy reserve transformed to purpose. He handed me Hoola and hopped onto the bed.
In the next beat of my pounding heart, he’d captured both of my mother’s flailing wrists and pulled her into his arms. “Good morning, milady,” he said, restraining her while brushing her hair off her face with a gentle touch of his other hand. “All is well, Shalana. I promise you, all is well. Zophia is here. Hoola is here. And I am here to spend the day with you. I thought we might explore for a few hours and visit your animal family.”
Shalana stilled. She blinked up at him with wide, hopeful eyes. “Would you like to meet them?”
“Yes, I would. That is, if you are agreeable to me inviting myself into your company.”
“You’ll stay?”
“If you shall have me, yes. How about a nice bath, something hot to eat, and then we shall go on an adventure?”
When she nodded, Aust helped her to the floor and tucked her under his arm. After leading her into the bathroom, the water came on in a rush. I staunched the bleeding of my lip with a tissue and gathered myself to help.
I stopped half way to the door and listened.
Aust’s voice rose in an Elven ballad. The hard surfaces of the bathroom amplified the sound, his pitch clear, the words foreign, yet I felt their meaning as if I understood. I’d heard Jade sing before, but Aust’s voice was even more amazing.
Bree was one truly lucky woman.
With the confrontation over and my mother once again sedate, my legs threatened to fail me. I sat on the edge of the bed, closed my eyes, and listened.
When he stepped out, I waved to my mother settled in a cloud of bubbles. “I shall await you just outside the door. If you have need of me, call. Then we begin a grand adventure.”
“With our animal family. Right, son?”
He eased the door almost shut. “Yes, when you are ready.”
Aust’s attention shifted from the bathroom to me, and in the next moment, I launched off the bed and hugged him. He smelled of the wildness of nature, a scent that reminded me so much of my mother it hurt. He also smelled of suede and healthy man. That scent was all his own, and I found it remarkably soothing.
“Thank you,” I said. “You’re so good with her.”
He pulled back and lifted my chin to inspect my face. “Oh, sweeting, let me aid you.”
He picked up Hoola and slid into the bathroom. A moment later, he returned with a damp facecloth and shut Hoola in with my mother. “She would never hurt you.”
I brushed away the last of my tears. “I don’t know what to do for her when she gets like that. It’s like my mother is gone. I can’t reach her.”
Aust backed me onto the bed and dabbed at my lip. The cloth, warm and soft, came away stained with blood. “She is never gone, merely lost. For her, it is like being trapped in a labyrinth at night. She hears our voices but cannot see to find her way to us. So, we must find our way to her.”
I pulled back to look at him. “How can you possibly know that? You only met her yesterday.”
He shrugged, looking sheepish. “It is our ability. I hear her the same way I hear the animals. Not words, but thoughts and impressions. It is difficult to explain.”
His handsome face blurred behind another round of tears. “How can you possibly be real? And what did I do to deserve your help?”
The bed creaked as he shifted beside me. He hugged me to his side and brushed my hair from my eyes. “Sweeting, it is I who is blessed beyond measure to include you and your mother into my life.”
“You’re amazing. Thank you.”
“I am a friend. And as such, at the risk of overstepping, I offer my company to watch over your mother while you sort things out with the Pantheon Council and the others. Castian refused to wake you last night because he wanted you to have time with Shalana, but I fear you must needs go.”
I drew an unsteady breath. “I know. I want to bring her with me, but it hurts and confuses her to be away from the animals.”
Aust squeezed my shoulder. “Fash not, I shall treat her as my own naneth and ensure her every need is fulfilled.”
CHAPTER FOUR
The next hours and days passed in a blur of disbelief and grief. My chest ached. My lungs failed to inflate. My entire world seemed alien. How was I supposed to connect with the people and places of the realm around me? I didn’t know how.
Someone knocked on my door, and I swiped the blanket across my face. After clicking on the bedside lamp, I rolled over to see who it was. “Come in.”
The door swung open a foot, and a shaft of light from the hall bathed a long slice of gold across the hardwood. Jade and Lexi let themselves inside. The two of them made quite a pair, both dressed in rock slogan t-shirts and ripped jeans. Both wore black eyeliner and royal blue lipstick. Jade stood round with her unborn young. Lexi remained petite, with her ebony spiked hair and velvety wings.
“Hey there,” Jade said, coming over to the bed. “We’re taking you out of the house for a bit. It’s time to show you what Haven life is like after dark.”
I studied their outfits more closely and still couldn’t make sense of what they were up to. “Does it involve pledging my fealty to Vampires?”
Jade laughed. “No. There’s a guest band at the Hearthstone tonight. The locals often dress up for fun.”
“It’s kind of you to ask, but you don’t have to entertain me. Allowing me a place in your home, for the time being, is more than enough.”
Jade shook her head. “We didn’t ask you to join the fun out of obligation. We’re meeting Bree, Nyssa, and some of the guys for a night out. It’ll be fun.”
“I’m certain you’ll have more f
un if I’m not there. Nothing brings down the joy of a room like a Fate.” I sat upright and brushed my hair out of my face. “What’s the saying? Hated by all, loved by few.”
Lexi snorted. “Who gives two shits what people think? You’ve been exiled onto the island of misfit toys, Zo. Same as the rest of us. Embrace it, babe. There are worse things.”
“It’s only temporary,” I said. “And though I appreciate the notion, pity isn’t something I enjoy.”
Lexi screwed up her face. “I don’t do pity. I’m more of an in your face reality girl. You’ve been dumped. It sucks, yeah, but you’ve got a whole immortal life ahead of you to figure things out. Why dwell on it?”
I sat up straighter and brushed the sheets, diamond tears launching off the bed and falling like soundless rain to the plush area rug beneath the bed. “I’m not dwelling. I’m banned from my mother and believe Abaddon has targeted her as Rheagan’s vessel. I’m panicked and angry.”
Jade squeezed my arm, her emerald green eyes the same jewel tone as her father’s. “Castian will get you home. He’s meeting with the Fae Council as we speak and will let us know what happens as soon as he has things worked out. Until then, Aust, Castian, and I will watch over her.”
“Feel better?” Lexi said. “’Cuz we gotta go if we’re gonna get a good booth.”
“I should still pass. I haven’t eaten since yesterday, and I’m not sure whether I’m starving or about to throw up.”
“Both viable options,” Lexi said, pulling me from the covers and shoving me toward the ensuite. “The Hearthstone has food, and before the night is through, more than one person will fertilize the bushes. I’ll hold your hair if you’re one of them.”
I pictured them holding my four-foot long braid as I bent over the bushes, my gown flowing in the night breeze. “I don’t enjoy crowds, Lexi. People look at my skin and clothing and see nothing but a Fate.”
“That’s an easy fix,” Jade said.
“Yep.” Lexi nodded as she flicked on the bathroom light. “Jade has plenty of pre-preggo clothes you can borrow, and I am the Queen of Sephora.”
“You’re not going to take no for an answer, are you?”
Lexi beamed and patted my arm. “Good that you recognize that. Now, stop the negative chit-chat and let’s go have fun.”
Fun? The thought struck a hollow chord in the center of my chest. Had I ever had fun? Growing up with my mom, was fun. Shalana viewed the natural world as one giant adventure.
Since being named a Fate, I had, at the very most, took pleasure in isolated moments, experienced things, endured life. Then why did it hurt so much to have that life taken away?
“Lexi, give me one of your knives.”
She slid me a sideways glance but freed the blade sheathed to her thigh. “It’s sharp, Zo. Be careful.”
I tested the weight of the weapon as I turned it in my palm. The grip was textured, fitted to the palm of a woman’s hand. “I’m sick to death of being careful.”
Grabbing my braid, I sawed the woven chestnut strands. “Always careful what I say. Careful who I trust. Careful with my sisters. For what? So an entire Council can unanimously vote me unworthy? It’s exhausting being what everyone expects. Why should I play the part one more minute?”
With a final yank, the blade soared free and sliced through my hair completely. I handed her both the knife and the twined rope of my braid. “You offered to hold my hair, didn’t you? Well, here you go.”
“All righty then,” Lexi said, a priceless look blinking in her amethyst eyes. “I did not see that coming but let’s go with it.”
Jade chuckled and handed me a brush. “Let’s get you ready. One well-deserved reckless night, coming up.”
The Hearthstone stood at the heart of the Haven social scene. Locals gathered here for the sense of community. Travelers gathered for information. And the downtrodden gathered here for the ambiance of whiskey-soaked tables, loud music, and cardiac arrest-causing foods served in baskets.
“Great, isn’t it?” Lexi asked as she hopped up into a booth. Situated just off the dance floor, we were opposite the small stage and had a clear view of the entire place.
I reached to gather my dress before sitting and found only my denim-clad legs. This would take getting used to.
I caught my look in the mirrored beer sign. Lexi had fixed my hair by cutting it shaggy at the back and along my bangs. I’d never had bangs before and was amazed at how different I looked. We’d covered my opal skin with a layer of foundation, given me the same black eyeliner and blue lipstick they wore and voila, the Fate was a Fate no longer.
“I can’t get over how light I feel.” I shook my head, amazed at the weight I’d been carrying for centuries.
Jade waved toward the door. The band struck a few test cords as Bree and Nyssa slid into the booth and joined us. Both ladies stared for a beat and then broke into genuine smiles.
“Holy shit,” Bree said, her smile wide and white. “You look amazing. I almost didn’t recognize you.”
“I’m in disguise.” I accepted a pink drink from Jade and sipped from the glass. I licked the sugared rim, and the mixture of sweet and tart exploded in my mouth.
Lexi placed her fingers between her tongue and let off an ear-breaking whistle toward the growing crowd. She plunked down on the bench and grabbed her drink. “We convinced Zophia to take the night off from being herself. Tonight, she’s anyone she wants to be.”
“Perfect,” said Bree, holding two fingers up to the bar. One of her foster brothers nodded and turned to the beer fridge behind him. “And who are you being?”
“I have no idea. I never considered anything beyond who and what I was born. If I’m not a Fate, who am I?”
“Whoa,” Lexi said, snorting. “Enough of that introspective bullshit. Tonight, we drink. Get contemplative tomorrow.”
The music came up, and Bree reached to grab two bottles from her brother’s tray. “A toast to Zophia. After a lifetime of doing what is expected, tonight she’s open to the unexpected. May you find every happiness.”
The live band took the stage at ten p.m., and then the roadhouse went from busy to bursting. The five of us danced with reckless abandon for the first set but eventually, Jade had to sit, and I had to use the washroom. I’d lost count of how many pink drinks passed my lips, but my bladder hadn’t.
It was many. Many many.
I exited the ladies room and nearly crashed into a group of men coming up the back hall.
“Hey there,” Julian said, catching my arms before we crashed. “Sounds busy tonight. You having a good time?”
He, Cowboy, and the pierced warrior I’d seen sparring with Savage had arrived through the rear exit. The scent of exotic tobacco clung to their clothes, the same way their t-shirts clung to the sculpted musculature of their chests and arms.
I straightened and nodded. Not even Julian could dampen my spirits tonight. “Very good. Excuse me.”
I practically skipped up the hall and hopped back into our booth. The three men followed.
“Hey Blaze,” Cowboy said. “How you feelin’, sweetheart?”
Jade smiled and scootched over to make space. “Like there are two disgruntled aliens battling for space inside me.” As if to prove her point, her belly shifted and rolled with the movement of her unborn twins.
“Man, that’s just wrong,” the pierced one said, a look of disgust blanketing his face. Strobing lights from the dance floor caught the nickel piercings through his brow and lip. The man wore as much black eyeliner as we did. I wondered if that was his flair for fashion or something else.
“So, Jade, introduce us to your friend.” Julian gestured to me across the table. Cowboy gave him a puzzled look, but before he could say anything, Jade laughed and spoke up.
“Oh, sure, this is my friend, Destiny. She’s had a falling out with her family and is at Haven for a bit. This is my brother Julian, and then, Cowboy, and Kobi.”
I looked at Jade, wondering what I miss
ed. Cowboy rubbed a hand over his mouth and coughed to hide his laughter.
“Ah, yes,” I said, catching on. “It’s nice to meet you.”
Julian smiled and held up my empty glass until one of the Lion-Weres nodded. “Well, I’m glad you found Haven, Destiny. We’ll take good care of you until things get sorted out on the homefront.”
“I gotta get a drink,” Kobi said, laughing. “And you’re an idiot, Julian. Just so ye know.”
“Why? What did I do?” Kobi and Cowboy melted into the crowd and Julian slid up into the booth opposite Jade and I. “Ignore them. So, back to you. How are you enjoying Haven?”
The evening continued in much the same manner. Drinking. Dancing. And me keeping up the pretense of being Jade’s friend, Destiny. Kobi and Cowboy let Lexi, Nyssa, and Bree in on Jade’s joke and everyone played along when they returned from the dance floor. Fascinating how sweet and funny the man was with no clue I was a Fate.
When the conversation hit future occupations, I set down my drink and lit up. “I have an idea about that.”
Cowboy pushed a plastic basket of chicken wings my way. “Let’s hear it. What are you thinking?”
I moved two of the slathered pieces of chicken onto my side plate and sucked my fingers clean. “In the washroom, I met a woman counting a big stack of money. I asked her what she did to earn it, and she said she is a hooker. Well, I’m a weaver. I think my skills could easily translate to hooking if there’s a demand here—”
The table broke out in laughter.
“What’s so funny?”
Jade shot the men a stern look and fought not to smile herself. “You misunderstood, hon. Hooker is a Modern Realm term for a prostitute. The woman in the washroom made that money being paid for sex, not by crafting textiles.”
Another wave of laughter took the table, and my eyes stung.
I brushed at my hot cheeks, diamonds clinking off the ceramic plate beneath my chin. “You must all think me ridiculous. I feel foolish.”