by Faye Sonja
"I'm to travel to the city for a few days, to talk with some man about expanding White Elk to become a proper town. Maybe even a city one day," he said, with a glint in his eyes. "If I can get the suppliers, we'll be able to build a whole new row of houses up this way, as well as some shops, which I'm sure the ladies will appreciate..."
"Hey now," Kit cut in, putting a hand up as Jedediah scowled besides him. "We don't need none of that stuff, Thomas. We're fine just the way we are."
"We are not," Thomas said, indignant. "Maybe it's fine out here for an old man like you, Kit. But I'm a young man with a baby on the way, and I'd like to see this town thriving. Modern, even. Though that word is like a curse word to you."
Kit scowled at him and turned away, and Thomas immediately regretted his choice of words. "Forgive me, Kit, I'm just excited."
"Well, who's gonna look after Mollie while you're gone?" he asked, glancing back at Thomas over his shoulder. "I suppose you got so far ahead of yourself that you never thought of that. As per usual. She won't be able to travel with you, not in her condition."
"Yes, you're right..." Thomas murmured, scratching his head. "I hadn't thought of that." He reached a hand out to pat his horse, who was getting restless, neighing, eager to go. "Ah, but she'll be fine for a day or two, no doubt. I'm sure she won't mind!
He jumped back on his horse, wary as he went that Kit and Jedediah exchanged that same knowing glance between them.
* * *
"You promised you would be here from now on! How can you just take off like this?" Mollie slammed the pot down on the stove so that water tipped over the edge and onto the open flame below, causing it to sizzle.
"Mollie, it's just a very short trip. I won't be away for very long. I'll be back home before you know it."
"Back home before you know it." Mollie felt a ringing in her ears as the words caused a sort of echo in her head. She felt like she had heard those words before.
She shook her head, trying to stop the ringing.
"Back home before you know it."
Thomas came around to her, tried to lay a hand on her back, but she shrugged him off of her.
"I should have known better than to trust your words, Thomas! Your actions tell me everything I need to know." She stopped dead in her tracks and put both hands on her waist. "They tell me you are not ready for a family! You are not ready for the responsibilities of being a father."
"Mollie, you need to calm down, it is not good for the baby..." he tried to say, but she was already stomping back and forth again.
"My family was right..." she muttered, turning her back, but not caring if Thomas heard what she was saying.
"What does that mean?" he took a step closer to her. "What do you mean, your family was right?"
She spun to look at him. "They said I should never come here! That it was a terrible, haunted place, with men who didn't care about anyone but themselves!"
Thomas took a step backwards. "That is a little harsh, Mollie."
"It's true though. Don't try to tell me otherwise. The only thing you care about is yourself, Thomas! You care nothing about me or my baby!"
"Our baby," Thomas said, shaking his head. "This is our baby, Mollie, not just yours. Now, please, sit down so you don't do anything to harm it."
Her eyes shot wide open. "Oh, don't you dare accuse me of not caring, of trying to harm this baby. You're the one who is bringing harm to this family, Thomas, not me!"
"Will you please sit down!"
She shook her head. "No, I'm not sitting down." Her voice came out ragged, and her chest heaved up and down; sweat broken out on her forehead despite the fact that it was ten degrees outside. "In fact, I'm not staying here at all."
"What does that mean?"
Mollie turned on her heel and began to stomp out of the room. "I'm doing as my family told me to all along. I'm going back to live with them, so they can look after me."
Thomas's jaw dropped open as he ran after her, grabbing her by the arm before she could leave the room. "Mollie, don't be ridiculous! You are going to give birth any day now, you can't travel in this state...it is dangerous to both you and the baby."
She pulled her arm free. "I will be back home before the baby arrives," she said firmly, walking to the bedroom, where she began to pull her belongings out of the drawers. "Then things will be much better. I'll be back with my real family. The people who actually know how to look after me."
Thomas pulled back, stung by her words. "Mollie..." he said. "Please tell me you don't mean these things." His voice was low, filled with sorrow. "Please don't say that I can't look after you. That this isn't your real family. We took those vows in front of God..."
She spun around to look at him. "I'd already said those words once before," she spat. "To John."
There was silence, a dead, heavy emptiness in the air, as soon as those words hit them.
Thomas swallowed. "So that's what this is all about," he said quietly, bowing his head. "I will never be as good as him. You can never love me as much as you loved him, can you?"
He looked up at her, hoping to see something in her face that would tell him he was wrong, but her face was still, and she said nothing to put his mind at ease.
"I see," he said, backing out of the room. "If you need to go, Mollie, I can't stop you."
* * *
"Mollie, where on Earth are you going, dear?" Susan called, running out into the street after her, the cool wind hitting her face as she ran, the sharpness of it entering her lungs, almost winding her. "What are you lugging that bag along behind you for?" She ran until she caught up to the younger girl. "Mollie, please stop."
Mollie dropped the bag and leaned forward, breathless. "Susan..." she gasped, as Susan ran to her side.
"My goodness, you need to sit down."
She guided her to a log by the side of the road, as Mollie collapsed on top of it. "Mollie, please tell me, what is going on? Why are you out here, in the freezing cold, dragging your luggage?"
She struggled to get the words out through her ragged breath. "I'm leaving...Susan...I'm going back home."
Susan's jaw dropped open. "Going home? You're kidding me, aren't you? Whatever for?"
Mollie shook her head and big, fat tears fell out of her eyes. "I can't stay here anymore, Susan...I can't...it's all..." The sobs took over and she could no longer speak. Susan leaned over and wrapped an arm around her, as Mollie buried herself into her friend's chest.
Susan waited till the sobs has subsided before she spoke. "Mollie," she said, gently. "You know you can't travel back home when you're about to have the baby. What if it arrives while you’re travelling?"
Mollie's sobs started up again, harder this time. "Oh, Susan, I know. I do know..." Her chest heaved as she reached up to wipe away her tears with the back of her hand. "But I can't go back to the house now. Oh Susan, I can't possibly face Thomas after what I said to him. I'm sure he'll never want to see me ever again! Oh, I've really ruined things now..." She began to sob again as Susan gently patted her on the back.
"I'm sure you haven't. Thomas is a very forgiving man. He lives by God's word, Mollie, and he has vowed to love and protect you no matter what happens. I'm sure nothing has happened that is so broken it can't be fixed."
Mollie sat up and wiped at her eyes with a hanky, till it was soaking wet. "Susan, I told him that he wasn't my real family. That..." she trailed off, not wanting to relive the things she'd said. "I said a terrible thing to him. Let him believe a terrible thing."
"Mollie, Thomas will understand. If you only spoke in anger, or out of fear, he will forgive you for what you said."
She shook her head. "No, he won't. He didn't even stop me from leaving. He is going to let me go, he's not even here...I know, Susan, without a shadow of a doubt, that he never wants to speak to me ever again. How could he ever look past what I've done..."
Susan tapped her on the shoulder, and pointed down the road. "Mollie, look."
Mollie pulled
her head up and looked down the road through red, bleary eyes. "Thomas..." she murmured, standing up. Her legs wobbled underneath her, and she reached out for something to steady her. Susan grabbed her hand.
"It's okay," she whispered. "You're going to be fine now. Go to him."
Mollie nodded, tears still in her eyes, but a smile now spreading on her lips as she walked towards Thomas.
"Mollie..." he said, running to meet her. "Stay there, don't move."
Susan bowed her head and slunk away, as Thomas wrapped his arm around his wife. "Mollie...I'm sorry. I'm sorry for all of it." His face was buried into her neck, as he squeezed her gently. "I'm sorry I wasn't there for you, and that I didn't stop you from leaving..."
"Shh, you're here now," she said, squeezing her eyes shut. "Thomas, I'm so sorry for what I said. For what I made you believe."
Thomas pulled back and gazed down at her full, pretty face. "Mollie, please let's not worry about that anymore.."
"But..." she said, her eyes still heavy with tears. "How can you forgive me, Thomas? For saying that you aren't my family..." She stopped and looked away from him, down at the ground.
He grabbed her face between his hands. "Mollie, just tell me you didn't mean any of it, and we'll move on. Please..."
"I didn't mean it, Thomas," she whispered, looking up, searching his eyes. "I promise I didn't mean it. I should never have made you feel that way. It was wrong of me, when you've been so kind and loving to me. I want to stay here, with you. I was so foolish to throw a tantrum like that, to just leave."
He hugged her tight. "I know you were just acting out of emotion, my love. It's all okay."
As he pressed her to him and Mollie took him in, felt his heartbeat beat against hers, she prayed, thanking God that He had sent Thomas back to her, that all was forgiven. And she promised, vowed, to never act so foolishly again.
"Come on, Mollie, let's go home now."
* * *
"Mollie, are you okay?"
"Shh," she said, swinging her feet over the side of the bed. "I'm fine, don't worry. Just getting a drink of milk. You go back to sleep."
Thomas said something but it was muffled by the pillow, and Mollie slipped out, walking to the sitting room where she sat down quietly and pulled out her journal, flicking though the pages till the photo fell out.
She bent over and picked it up, her actions painstakingly slow, as she was careful not to make a sound lest Thomas come in and catch her.
She reached over and lit a candle, then put it carefully out of the way of the door, so that the flickering light wouldn't reach the hallway.
Underneath the candlelight, she looked over the photo of John.
"I'll be back home before you know it." Those were the words he had said to her right before he'd left to fight.
But he hadn't come back.
She ran a thumb over the photo, tracing the outline of John's face.
"Please God, forgive me," she prayed.
* * *
7
A Bundle Of Joy Arrives
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“ My heart will remain my own, on
that I give my promise. But I need
to do what's best for my baby...”
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Two Weeks Later.
"Thomas," she said, breathlessly. "I think the baby's coming. Run, you need to get Isabella right away!"
Clamoring for his hat, Thomas raced towards the door. "I'll go as fast as these legs will take me! Hold tight, Mollie, I'll be back with help shortly!"
* * *
Isabella walked out of the room, a grin as wide as the great While Elk lake spreading across her face. "It's a baby girl, Thomas."
He let out a burst of joy, bringing his hands up to cover his mouth. "A girl?"
Isabella nodded. "Congratulations. She's beautiful."
"And she's well, is she?" Thomas whispered. "With all the problems Mollie had during the pregnancy, I was awful worried that the baby might be born ill or something...We both were."
Isabella shook her head. "She's absolutely perfect. No signs of illness."
"And Mollie?"
"Mollie is exhausted, but fine."
Thomas reached his hands together and looked towards the sky. "Oh, thank you, God."
Isabella reached out and placed a hand on Thomas' arm. "He really has blessed you today, Thomas. With a beautiful daughter."
"He has," Thomas said, his eyes sparkling with tears. "Can I go in and see them?"
"Mollie is resting up. But I'll bring the baby out for you now, before I go back to tend to my final business with Mollie."
After a moment or two, Isabella returned with a tiny bundle of limbs, wrapped tightly in a woolen blanket. Thomas gazed down at the bundle with joy, admiring her tiny hands and feet, and pink, rosy cheeks that reminded him so much of Mollie. "She's got her eyes squeezed shut..." Thomas said. "What color are they?"
Isabella reached over and placed the bundle in his arms. "Sometimes baby's eyes change color, in the first few weeks," she said gently. "But they do look to me like they are going to be green." She looked up at Thomas's face, seeing how proud he was as he cradled the newborn. "Congratulations, Thomas. You're going to make a fine father."
He gazed down at the tiny creature, his heart swelling, feeling as though it might burst, he felt so much love for the child.
"And, Thomas?" Isabella added.
"Yes?" He still didn't bring his eyes up; they were transfixed by the child in his arms.
"Mollie wants you to choose the name."
"Charlotte," he said. "Her name is Charlotte."
* * *
With some relief, Mollie lay back and glanced up at Isabella. "I really did it..." she sighed, closing her eyes. "It's all over, at long last."
Isabella was unable to control the laugh that escaped from her lips. "I'm afraid the hard work is only just beginning, Mollie."
Mollie's eyes sprang open. "Why, whatever do you mean? Surely the worst part is over?"
Isabella gazed down at her with a very strange expression on her face. "Now you've got a baby to look after, my child. That's going to be the hardest work there is."
Mollie smiled, waving a hand. "Oh, that will be the easy part. She is going to be so easy to love, our little Charlotte. Oh, Isabella, I know I shall never work a day in my life now. The rest is going to be very easy."
Isabella smiled and reached down to wipe Mollie's brow, fixing the pillow underneath her so that it was plump and full. "You're going to make a great mother, Mollie. And Thomas is going to make a wonderful father. And I'm sure that it will be easy at times, with all the love you've got to share now. Love will make it feel like easy work at some times, and hard work at others."
Mollie nodded. "I know," she said softly, looking down at her hands. "I'm not so naive. I know what terrible times myself and Annie gave my mother when we were small girls. But..." she looked up. "If I'm being totally honest, Isabella, and maybe it sounds awful to say it, I'm just relieved the pregnancy is over with. I was so tired of feeling so ill, and worried about what was wrong. Worried that something was wrong with the baby. That I might lose her. When I say the hard part is over, that's what I mean. I'm just so happy Charlotte is here now, and Thomas and I can start our real lives as a family."
Isabella smiled. "I'm so happy for you, Mollie." She gave the girl one last pat, before checking she was comfortable enough to be left. "I'll be back in the morning, Mollie. Please send Thomas for me if anything should happen before then."
"I'm sure I'll be fine," Mollie said, before adding, "and thank you, Isabella. For everything."
"It's all part of the job, my dear."
"Isabella," she called, before she could leave. "We want you to be Charlotte's Godmother. And Kit, her Godfather."
Isabella blushed a deep crimson before bowing her head and answering quietly, "I would be honored."
* * *
8
An Accident Discovery
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“ My heart will remain my own, on
that I give my promise. But I need
to do what's best for my baby...”
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Three Weeks Later.
"She's so beautiful, isn't she?" Mollie said, leaning over Charlotte's crib, reaching a finger into the cot for Charlotte to grab. She reached up with her chubby hands and gripped the finger, letting out a little gurgle as she went.
Mollie smiled down. "I'm glad she's a happy baby. Barely giving us any trouble."
"Now that she's actually out in the world," Thomas pointed out. "She gave you an awful lot of trouble while you were carrying her."
Mollie reached an hand around Thomas. "That's true. Oh well, that's all forgotten now.” She kept her other hand in the crib, as Charlotte brought her hands up to her mouth and started to chew on Mollie's finger.
"Oi!" Mollie called out, but she giggled. "Hey, that hurt." She laughed and looked at Thomas. "Maybe I spoke too soon. Maybe she is going to be a little troublemaker after all."
As Charlotte continued to gnaw on her mother's finger, Mollie gazed down. "I'm so glad her eyes have stayed green, Thomas. Just like yours," she whispered, leaning in close to her husband.
"Mollie," he said, quietly. "Do you really consider Charlotte to be my daughter?"
She looked up, startled. "Of course I do, Thomas. Why-ever do you ask that?"
"I'm just checking," he said softly, giving her a squeeze. "I didn't mean to alarm you. I'm so grateful to have you and Charlotte in my life, so happy that God blessed me with the two of you. I just want to make sure that you feel the same way."