by Jules Tyler
Liz ignored her inner goddess, who was fanning herself somewhere in the far corners of Liz’s mind.
“I’ll be in the dining room then,” she laughed nervously before dashing out of the room.
Seriously, what the fuck is wrong with me? This man is practically still a stranger and I’m having inappropriate thoughts about him? Never mind the fact that he’s technically my coworker and you never shit where you eat! For fuck sakes, I’m not so lonely I’d be willing to put myself through that kind of torture, am I?
But what if he isn’t just about the quick lay? What if he wants something serious? He is very kind. I don’t see how giving him a chance could be that bad.
Liz sat down in a chair at the table everyone had been sitting together the day before, rubbing her temples as she tried to sort through her thoughts. It shouldn’t be this hard. Having anxiety was the worst. She knew how to cope with it, as she’d been through therapy as a teenager, but after the shit she’d been through as an adult, those thoughts only became stronger. It was like having multiple people shouting at her in her head. It was so frustrating to deal with. She was certain normal people didn’t have these thoughts to fight with. If they saw something they wanted, they likely went after it, throwing caution to the wind. This was like having a constant case of stagefright, coupled with a messed up sense of fight or flight.
Jesse walked out of the kitchen and sat down at the table across from her, “So, do you like space?”
“Sorry, what?” Liz asked, furrowing her brow in confusion as she came out of the mental fog she had been in.
“Your shorts, and that hilarious shirt you’re wearing made me assume you must like space?” Jesse chuckled as he gestured to her outfit.
Liz looked down at her shirt and laughed, “Oh, yeah. I love space. The tank top was a gift from a roommate I had when I was going to culinary school. She thought it was hysterical and that I needed it when I was having a bad day. I kept it to humor her, but now I kind of like it.”
“Well it matches your shorts perfectly. What makes you like space? Is there one specific thing you like more than anything else, or is it space as a whole?” Jesse inquired, looking genuinely interested in what she had to say.
Liz thought to herself for a minute, sifting through all of the reasons she liked space and then picked one that stood out above all the others, “I love the stars, especially constellations. I used to climb out of my window as a teenager and lay on the grass outside of my room to watch for shooting stars. After awhile, I would start to search for the constellations. The stories surrounding them have always intrigued me. I think it’s really cool how they exist, but they play a big part in an even bigger picture. Take one star away from a constellation, and then it’s only a group of stars.”
“Wow, that’s really deep,” Jesse remarked, holding Liz’s gaze with his own.
Shrugging nonchalantly, Liz said, “It’s just nice to feel like you’re part of something that’s bigger than yourself, I guess.”
“What’s your favorite constellation?” Jesse asked.
Liz blushed as she thought of sharing that part of herself with someone, “I could show you.”
“What, tonight? I’m okay with that idea,” Jesse smiled at her.
“No, I mean… I have it tattooed somewhere,” Liz grinned, trying to force herself to be brave.
“Oh, how scandalous,” Jesse feigned a gasp.
Liz rolled her eyes. “Never mind. I guess you’ll just have to wait to see it.”
“Awe, come on. I was just kidding around. I have plenty of ink,” Jesse said, rolling up the sleeves of his shirt to reveal the half sleeves he had done. Each sleeve had components surrounding music and bears. She’d have to ask for details about those later.
How ironic.
“Alright, since you showed me yours, I’ll show you mine,” Liz sighed, standing up and walking around the table so she was close to Jesse. Rolling down the top hem of her shorts just enough to see her right hip, Liz revealed the ink that laid beneath.
Jesse sat in silence as he looked between her and the tattoo several times before finally asking, “Can I touch it?”
Liz hesitated a moment before nodding slowly, determined to stay brave. She tried not to shiver under his touch as he gingerly ran his finger from the tip of the tail, down the panhandle, and to the rest of the body. He was playing connect the dots with the majority of the constellation, and his touch felt so good. Each movement was that much sweeter to her than the previous one. She could feel the excitement slowly pooling in her middle.
“Say something,” Liz begged softly as Jesse began to trace her tattoo a second time.
“Your favorite constellation is Ursa Major,” Jesse murmured reverently, as though he was sitting in a church pew praying. Liz nodded again before Jesse looked up at her with questions in his eyes. “But why?”
Liz whispered as her voice caught in her throat from the nerves, “Because bears are protectors. I needed a protector for my broken heart in college, a constant reminder that I could be stronger that I thought I was as long as I kept trying to move forward. This was my reminder.” Liz moved to pull away from his touch and go back to her seat, but instead, Jesse wrapped his hands around her hips and pulled her closer.
Jesse brushed his lips against her tattoo and Liz felt both peace and pleasure roll through her body in waves. It had been so long since she’d had anyone touch her, let alone kiss her. Especially somewhere so intimate. After a moment of bliss, Liz could hear people’s voices coming towards the kitchen and she pulled away from their embrace and raced for the kitchen, leaving Jesse alone in his chair with more questions than he had answers to.
Chapter Eight
The rest of the morning went by quickly, but Jesse couldn’t help feeling the sting of rejection from Liz pulling away from his kiss before breakfast. She had literally slipped through his fingers when she had heard the guys walking up to the restaurant and hadn’t spoken many words to him on the way down to Boise. Now they were in her apartment packing up the last round of boxes for the truck. She was obviously avoiding him, and that was beginning to frustrate him. He needed to show her that he meant business… Or pleasure… Or both. But how?
He watched her move around the apartment, grabbing little knick-knacks and stuffing them into her box. She had such beautiful, soft curves, he just wanted to show her how much he could appreciate them for her. Not just that, but he needed to show her that he could care for her - that he already cared for her. Intended mates were tricky when you were paired with humans by the Fates. As a shifter, you already knew that they were your mate and there is nothing you wouldn’t do for them to make them happy, comfortable, and safe in life. Humans, though, they were their own hairy beast when it came to recognizing their mates and feeling the pull to be with their mate. They often thought that it was love at first sight and would jump in with both feet without hesitation, but it wasn’t rare to run into humans like Liz, who obviously struggled with that kind of idea — the ones who didn’t think they were worthy of love or attention or the ones that felt the pull but thought they were nuts since they were only strangers.
Jesse had yet to determine which one he was working with when it came to Liz but he was almost certain it was the latter of the two options. She probably thought that this was just him lusting after her, but he needed to be careful. Right now, his bear was more concerned with bedding Liz and marking her as his mate. Jesse, however, didn’t want to spook her. He knew this would take the right amount of finesse. Everything had changed in his head when he had touched her tattoo. He had almost talked himself into going back to Seattle and fighting the mating, but touching her had changed everything. He had felt how smooth her skin was and then he had kissed it. He could still feel her on his lips. Liz had tasted like the sweetest berries plucked fresh from the bush and spun in sugar and he craved more.
“Jesse?” Liz’s voice floated through the fog in his thoughts. “I’m ready to go when you are
. I’ve already made arrangements for the property management company to sell my furniture and forward me the profits after they take their percentage.”
“Alright. If you’re sure you’ve got everything that you need, then let’s roll,” Jesse nodded as he picked up the last heavy box by his feet.
The pair walked in silence down to Brady’s truck, and he watched as Liz climbed in while he slid the box into the back of the truck. The lyrics to a song about apple-bottom jeans flitted through his mind, and he chuckled to himself. Liz definitely had a nice ass, and he would make sure she knew what watching it did to him, after they got past this little awkward patch.
Sliding in behind the steering wheel, he caught Liz’s eye and smiled at her before reaching over to squeeze her knee gently. “Are you excited?”
Liz returned his smile. “I am. It’s kind of bittersweet, saying good-bye to the place that holds so many memories for me from the past few years of my life, but this new adventure up at the lodge? This is the best thing to happen to me since being accepted into culinary school.”
Jesse shifted the truck into drive and eased it away from the curb. “What got you interested in cooking the way you do?”
“I used to watch a lot of cooking shows when my normal shows weren’t on television. Each show intrigued me. I liked watching how different chefs could take the same base ingredients and add their own flares to the food to create different delicious concoctions. The ones that they race against each other and the clock to make the best dishes are some of my favorite. It’s like a little adrenaline rush,” Liz explained, looking out the window at the passing cars.
“I know which ones you’re talking about. I like those ones too. I’ve watched a few episodes when we’ve stopped at hotels on tour,” Jesse said, turning on his blinker to merge into the lane he needed to be in to head towards the northbound highway.
“I didn’t have a lot of friends in high school, so I just stayed in most nights. Not for lack of trying on my parents’ ends though. They hated that I didn’t try to be more social. I was perfectly content to stay home and read or watch T.V. instead of going out and getting plastered on a Friday night. My friend Layla was the only one that was okay with just staying in. We’d go to the store, get copious amounts of junk food and soda, and binge watch our favorite shows together,” Liz reminisced.
“What happened to her? Do you guys still talk?” Jesse pried, curiosity getting the better of him.
Liz frowned. “We don’t talk a lot these days. She went to school to become a lawyer and got married after her junior year of college. We just kind of drifted apart.”
“That can happen sometimes with friends. I don’t talk to any of my friends from growing up anymore either. I just have Brady and the guys and now I’ve added Mama Ally and Stella to that list too. They’re my family,” Jesse said, hoping that knowing she wasn’t alone would make her feel better.
“I hope they like me,” Liz muttered as Jesse turned onto the highway that would take them home.
“Keep cooking the way you did last night, and they’ll be pounding down your door at all hours of the day and night. You weren’t wrong when you said the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. Those boys love to eat. Hell, so do I. Those muffins, by the way, were some of the best I’ve ever had, and that’s saying something, considering how many bakeries I’ve been able to try across the U.S.” Jesse recalled, feeling his mouth begin to water just at the thought of them.
Liz giggled from her seat, “Oh, shut up. No they weren’t.”
“Honest! May the Fates strike me down where I sit if I’m lying!” Jesse exclaimed.
Another fit of giggles racked through Liz. The sound was music to Jesse’s ears. If he could hear that sound every single day for the rest of his life, he would die a happy man. After a moment, Liz grew quiet again, and Jesse cast a sideways glance at her. Something was on her mind.
“Whatcha thinking about there, beautiful?” Jesse asked, brushing the back of his knuckles against her cheek.
“What is this thing between us, Jesse?” Liz asked seriously, her face looking conflicted by her thoughts.
Liz pushed his hand away from her face as Jesse asked, “What do you mean?”
“I’m just… I mean. Fuck, you make my head go all fuzzy, and I don’t understand why. Normally I’m a woman of facts and logic and food. After yesterday though, I can’t get you out of my head. Then this morning you went and kissed my tattoo! Hell, I practically took my pants off for you! I just want to make sure I make it clear that I’m not just some piece of ass or a groupie that you can have a one night stand with and then disappear the next morning. I don’t do friends with benefits either. I’ve been by myself for a while now and I’m okay with that because at least if I’m single, no one can hurt me,” Liz rambled, obviously losing control of her thoughts.
Jesse held a finger to her lips to silence her and looked over at her to say, “Okay, first of all, I don’t think you’re easy. Let’s just get that out there now. This morning you were just showing me your tattoo. You didn’t even have to move your shorts very much for me to see it. I liked what I saw and because I like you, I kissed the spot that it’s at. I don’t see you as some piece of ass and I’m not interested in a one night stand. However, now that you bring it up, I would like to get to know you better.”
There were few beats of silence, and Liz just stared at him like he had grown a second head.
“You… You want to get to know me?” Liz asked hesitantly.
“That’s what I said, isn’t it?” Jesse smirked at her, flicking on his blinker to signal he was turning right to merge onto the Banks-Lowman highway.
“It is, but I can’t tell if you’re just patronizing me or not,” Liz raised a skeptical eyebrow in his direction.
Jesse steered the truck off the side of the road and onto the shoulder area, threw the truck into park, and tossed open his door before slamming it behind him. He watched through windshield as he stalked around the front of the truck to Liz’s door and pulled it open. With how tall he was, he was looking into Liz’s eyes as he laced his fingers into her hair and guided her mouth to his. Their kiss was full of fire as the uncertainty Liz was feeling faded into the background and she got caught up in the moment with him.
After a moment, Jesse trailed kisses down Liz’s cheek to her ear and whispered, “I would never patronize you. You deserve passion like this. You deserve love. You deserve the world, and if you’ll let me, I’ll do my best to give it to you.”
He watched as Liz’s eyes remained glazed over from their kiss and feeling satisfied that she was satisfied, he returned to the driver’s side of the truck and began their drive back to Silver Creek again. Cranking up the radio, Jesse chuckled at the irony of the song that was playing. The singer was talking about chasing away the ‘what ifs’. He couldn’t have timed it more perfectly if he had tried.
Chapter Nine
The rest of the ride home had been charged with some form of electric current between the two of them, and Liz was struggling to ignore the need that was building between her legs. Liz’s longest relationship had been with Alex and she couldn’t recall him ever kissing her the way Jesse just had. Damn, Jesse sure knew what he was doing too. Playing hard to get or keeping her distance would both prove difficult for her after a kiss like that, but she was determined to do it. Jesse talked a good talk. Hell, he was even talented with his mouth. That alone was more than what she could say for any of the losers she’d ever dated, but her main concern was that while he seemed nice, he would still take what he wanted and leave. Just like everyone else had before him.
As they pulled up in front of her cabin, she could see Stella and Mama Ally leaving the lodge to come help unload with the guys. She sent up a silent thank you to the powers that be that she wouldn’t be alone with Jesse for the unpacking part too. She needed some time to herself to figure out what her next move would be.
Liz felt Jesse grab her arm as she went to open
the truck door. “I wasn’t kidding about what I said back there, Liz. I genuinely want to get to know you. Can you at least try to let me do that?”
Turning to lock eyes with him, Liz sighed, “Let me think about it.”
“Okay, well, while you’re thinking about it, why don’t you consider the idea of me taking you out tomorrow night?” Jesse suggested, grinning ear to ear at her.
Rolling her eyes at him, Liz shook her head in exasperation. He was relentless, that one. “I’ll consider it. Let’s just get my stuff unloaded so I can finish getting settled in here, alright?”
Jesse leaned over and pecked Liz quickly on the cheek, “Will do, Sweet Cheeks. Now let’s get this party rolling before it gets too late.”
Liz hopped out of the truck and ran up the stairs on the porch so she could throw open the door. Turning around, she smiled to herself as she faced everyone. It was nice to have help moving things in instead of her having to do all of this alone.