“You can get cancer if you don’t use your magic?” I asked blankly, reaching down to straighten my chair and sitting back down reluctantly.
“Cancer or any number of other diseases,” Aunt Dellie said seriously. “Bottling up magical power—especially power as formidable as your mother’s was—is very dangerous indeed.”
“But…she must have known that when she cast the forgetting spell on herself and the binding spell on you,” I protested. “So why would she do it?”
Aunt Dellie shook her head.
“I only wish I knew. It happened not long after your grandmother died of a stroke—Guinevere and I were both still in shock because she was only fifty, you know—and she passed so quickly! But your mother knew it was up to her to take over the leadership of the Coven. She was still so young—not even twenty yet. But she had the power and the leadership of the Coven was her birthright.”
“Windermere Coven, right?” I asked.
Aunt Dellie nodded.
“Yes—the same one your Great-great-great grandmother Corinne founded. Anyway, your mother and some of the stronger witches in the Coven went away on a kind of…retreat, I guess you could call it. They went to do cleansing rituals and seek the Goddess’s will. I expected that your mother would do the ceremony of transition and take over the leadership of the Coven when she returned but instead…” She shook her head, her voice failing.
“Instead she decided to swear off magic?” I asked, frowning.
Aunt Dellie nodded.
“She told me that she had seen things—terrible things—that had to be avoided at all costs. And she said the only way to avoid those things was for her to take herself out of the equation completely. So she ceded the leadership of the Windermere Coven to Winifred Rattcliff and worked the spell of forgetfulness on herself and the spell of binding on me. Then she moved away—all the way to Seattle, so she wouldn’t be reminded of her past in any way—married a Norm and had you. And that was that,” Aunt Dellie finished with a sigh.
“But…but when she got cancer. Surely you must have thought—” I began.
“Of course I thought it was probably her magic turning inwards—eating her from the inside out!” Aunt Dellie exclaimed passionately. “But I was bound and couldn’t say anything. And besides, your mother didn’t let me know about her cancer until it was well advanced—already metastasized.” She sighed unhappily and swiped at the tears welling up in her eyes. “I think some subconscious part of her knew that I would try to find a way to use magic to heal her, even though I have none of my own—that I would try to remind her of her past—a past she wanted desperately to forget.”
“But why?” I exclaimed. “What could she possibly have seen that was so bad it would make her abandon her heritage and raise me like a Norm? And live like a Norm herself, for that matter? What could it have been?”
Aunt Dellie shook her head.
“I don’t know—she never told me. I only know she was very firm about it—and also very firm that she never wanted you to be raised in the ways of magic either.” She bit her lip. “In that, I’m afraid I didn’t keep to her wishes. I couldn’t tell you about your heritage yourself, but I knew if I could get you into Nocturne Academy, you would find out on your own.” She looked at me appealingly. “I hope I did the right thing.”
“You did,” I told her firmly. “I just wish I knew what Mom saw on that retreat that made her so scared of her own magic…and that made her want me to keep away from magic too.”
“I wish I knew too,” Aunt Dellie said sadly. She got up from the table and began clearing her dishes. “But I feel that the Goddess will reveal it to you eventually, Meggie dear. I just hope you’ll be safe and nothing bad will happen because I went against your mother’s wishes.”
“I’ll be fine, Aunt Dellie,” I said, trying to put her mind at ease. “I’ve already got friends—coven-mates—and it feels like we’ve been together all our lives.”
She smiled and nodded.
“Oh yes—those first bondings are so strong and they can last a lifetime. You know, I believe the Goddess puts us together with our coven-mates for a reason. Each person she brings into your life has something they can teach you—and something you can teach them. Just listen to the will of the Goddess and stay true to your friends—they’ll see you through good times and bad, Meggie.”
I thought of Avery and Emma and Kaitlyn and realized I was missing them even now. Maybe I should text the three of them and see what they were up to.
As Aunt Dellie rinsed the dishes and loaded them in the dishwasher, I pulled out my battered cell phone which I had barely used at all my first week at Nocturne Academy. Mostly because there were so many dead spots due to magical interference that it was practically useless there.
It was an old iPhone with a thin, silvery crack across its face but it still worked all right and I certainly couldn’t afford anything newer. I pressed the home button to bring it to life and started to go to my texting app but then I saw that someone had already texted me.
Looking at the bubble popping up on my screen, I felt my heart start to pound. The text wasn’t from any of my coven-mates.
It was from Griffin.
51
I called to Aunt Dellie that I was tired and going up to my room early and then raced up the creaking wooden stairs, my iPhone clutched hard in my hand.
The minute I got into my bedroom with its antique toys and creepy, dead-eyed dolls, I threw myself on the bed and read what Griffin had written.
Hello, little witch. Home safe? his text read and it had been sent only a few minutes before.
At my aunt’s house, I texted back. Where were you after last period?
Heard the excellent news that Sanchez was expelled, was the reply. So I thought you didn’t need me anymore.
My heart leapt up in my throat and for a moment, I didn’t know what to say. Then my thumbs started moving on their own, it seemed.
That doesn’t mean I don’t want to see you, I sent back, aware of how shamelessly needy it sounded. Yet somehow I couldn’t seem to help myself.
His answer came back almost immediately.
I want to see you too, little witch. But I don’t know if it’s a good idea.
You won’t hurt me, I sent back. I know you won’t. We need to talk.
You don’t know that, he countered. And what is there to talk about?
I took a breath, wondering how much I should say.
Have you ever heard of a prophecy? I sent after deliberating for a moment. One that might involve you and me?
A bubble with three little dots blinked on my phone’s screen for so long I thought he must be writing a book. But when his reply finally popped up, almost five minutes later, it was only four words long.
We need to talk.
Where and when? I sent back immediately. I was aware that our original plan to meet Saturday night was probably getting thrown out the window but I didn’t care—I just wanted to see him. Between my breasts, the black key throbbed in agreement.
Tonight, Griffin texted back. My place.
Where’s your place? Never been there, I sent.
Not far from you. I’ll come get you. 10 all right?
I probably should have hesitated, probably should have thought things through. After all, I still wasn’t sure it was safe to be with him alone. But somehow I couldn’t seem to help myself—I just wanted to see him. No, I needed to see him.
Yes, I texted back. 10 works.
I knew Aunt Dellie would probably be asleep before then. She was an early to bed and early to rise kind of person and besides, she often taught a sunrise medication class. So sneaking out at ten to meet Griffin should present no problem at all.
Except the fact that it was probably hazardous to my health to be alone with the tall Nocturne.
But again, I couldn’t make myself care. The necklace at my throat burned and throbbed and my heart pounded. I craved his cool touch and wanted to look into those lig
htning and pitch eyes again.
Even if they were the last thing I ever saw.
52
Sneaking out of the house proved to be no problem at all. In fact, I didn’t so much sneak as just walked right out the front door and locked it behind me with the spare key Aunt Dellie had given me.
My aunt was already asleep, just as I had predicted. I had heard her snoring gently as I crept down the creaky wooden stairs, trying not to step on the steps that made especially loud noises.
The minute I found myself out in the moonlight in the middle of Aunt Dellie’s garden, I heard a low voice calling my name. Turning, I saw Griffin standing there, at the front gate of the low wooden fence which bordered the front lawn.
“You have to come to me, little witch,” he said when I waded carefully through the blooming flowers which were mixed in with vegetable plants. “I can’t come in to you unless the owner of the property invites me.”
Somehow I doubted Aunt Dellie would invite a Censured Nocturne onto her land so I came to the front gate to meet him. I was about to go through it when Griffin put a hand on mine, keeping me from opening the latch.
“Wait—consider if you should do this, Megan,” he murmured. He was wearing jeans and a white shirt, with the sleeves rolled up and the collar open to show the Blood Stone lock around his neck. “Consider if it is safe.”
“Are you telling me you’re planning to hurt me?” I asked, frowning at him. The cool touch of his hand on mine was making it hard to think and already I could smell his wintry scent, sharp and crisp, even over the lush, heavy floral smell of the flowers of the garden.
“All I can tell you is that I desire you more than ever,” Griffin murmured and his eyes were deep enough to drown in. “All I can tell you is that I have never wanted a female as badly as I want you. And…that I will try to control myself.”
These last words probably shouldn’t have been very reassuring, but I found myself reassured anyway.
He doesn’t want to hurt me, I told myself. It occurred to me that I probably should have called or texted Emma and Avery and Kaitlyn but somehow I hadn’t. Somehow I had wanted to keep this meeting secret, even from my coven-mates, though I had promised to keep them in the loop. Why had I done such a thing?
I didn’t know. I only knew I wanted to see Griffin desperately and now, here he was and I was going to take a chance and leave the safety of my aunt’s house and go with him, risks be damned.
I opened the gate and went to him.
53
It wasn’t very smart, I know, and I don’t recommend that anyone else walk out into a dark night with a Censured Nocturne. But the moment Griffin laced his long, cool fingers with mine, I couldn’t feel anything but a desire to get closer to him. There was literally no room for any other emotion—not fear or caution or anything else.
I just wanted to be with him.
“I’ve been thinking about you all day,” Griffin admitted in a low voice as he led me around the back of my aunt’s house towards the wilderness that grew there. And when I say wilderness, I mean it. It wasn’t just a few trees and some underbrush—there were thickets of vines and ivy all tangled together, making what looked like an impenetrable mass.
“I’ve been thinking about you too,” I said. Since he was being honest, I would too, I decided. Not that I had much choice since his mark on me made me tell him the truth, especially when he asked me direct questions.
Of course, that went both ways and I had some questions I was dying to ask him. But I wanted to wait until we got where we were going.
“How are we going to get through all this?” I asked. We had reached the edge of the tangled wilderness and I couldn’t see any way through it in the silvery light of the moon.
“This way—I made a path,” Griffin answered casually. Stooping down, he lifted a curtain of ivy and sure enough—I saw a narrow tunnel had been made through the greenery—which looked black in the moonlight.
“Um…” I hung back, uncertain. “Look, I don’t like to sound like a girly-girl, but…aren’t there poisonous snakes here in Florida? And alligators too?” I added. Who knew how close we might come to some hidden pond where the carnivorous creatures were hanging around, hoping for a midnight snack?
I didn’t want to be on the menu.
Griffin gave me one of his rare smiles.
“So you’ll willingly put yourself in the power of a Nocturne of very questionable character but you’re afraid of a few snakes?”
“And gators,” I reminded him. “Don’t forget those. This is Florida, after all.” As the humid night air could attest to.
“Animals of those kinds avoid me,” he said simply. “Predators sense that I could control them and they stay away—my scent repels them.”
“What—all predators?” I asked, rather dismayed. I liked animals, especially cats and dogs, which—even though they were cuddly pets—had to be classed as predators.
He shrugged. “As you see. You might have noticed that since I have taken your hand, not even a mosquito has tried to bite you. That is because you’re within my radius of influence.”
He was right, I realized. Florida nights were always humid and buggy. But since I had taken his hand, I hadn’t had to slap at a single mosquito. Well, that was nice, anyway.
“Where are we going?” I asked as we picked our way through the thick underbrush. There was a kind of narrow tunnel leading through it but there were still a lot of vines and branches to contend with. I was sure I would be lost in half a minute if Griffin wasn’t there to guide me, but he led the way and never let go of my hand once.
He looked back, giving me a humorless smile that was impossible to interpret.
“My place.”
“Avery told me your family lives in that big white Victorian over on Kings Street,” I said. “Um, are you taking me to meet your parents?” And would he want to be introduced to Aunt Dellie in turn?
But Griffin shook his head.
“That is where my family lives, but I am no longer in residence,” he remarked. “I make my home someplace…much more modest now that my parents have disowned me.”
“Because of you being Censured?” I asked, hoping it wasn’t too touchy of a subject.
“In part,” Griffin said neutrally. “Though I think it was the crime I was Censured for in the first place that really caused the rift.”
It was on the tip of my tongue to ask what that crime had been, but again I stopped myself. We needed to get to our destination before we talked. I wanted to sit with him and look him in the eyes when he answered the questions I had been burning to ask him, rather than talking to his back while he led me through the forest.
It seemed like the vines and trees went on forever but at last, we came to an opening in the broad, tropical leaves and suddenly we were out in the open again.
Well, if by open you meant a big, overgrown field full of knee-high weeds.
I took a step forward and stumbled over something on the ground.
“Be careful, little witch.” Griffin’s grip on my arm saved me from going ass over teakettle, as Aunt Dellie would have said. “Watch out for the tracks,” he added.
“Tracks?” I frowned, peering down at the darkness around my feet.
“This used to be an old train yard—back when the farmers used trains to send their produce to market instead of trucks, which they mostly use now. This whole field is full of tracks,” he told me. “In fact…here.”
“Oh!” I gasped, for he had swung me up into his arms as though I weighed nothing at all and was carrying me easily across the field. “You…you don’t have to do that,” I said, my voice sounding breathy in my own ears. Being so close to him made my heart beat like a drum.
“Yes, I do—you’ll just keep tripping otherwise,” he said looking down into my eyes. “Besides, I like carrying you,” he added, his voice dropping to a low purr. “I like your warmth and being so close to your sweet scent.”
“You smell pretty a
mazing to me too,” I admitted. Since we were telling the truth, I might as well let it all out.
“Then if you’re enjoying being close to me as much as I’m enjoying being close to you, there’s no reason to let you walk,” Griffin pointed out. “In fact, I can’t think of a single reason to put you down.”
“I…I guess not,” I whispered, feeling lost in his eyes. How he could walk in the dark without stumbling when he wasn’t even looking where he was putting his feet was beyond me, but I didn’t care as long as he was near.
It occurred to me that I’d had a few crushes before—who hasn’t by the time they get at least halfway through high school? But I had never, ever been so completely enamored of a boy before and have him be just as interested in me as I was in him. All I wanted to do was be close to Griffin—to never leave him. And from the way he was looking at me, he felt the same way.
Why were we so drawn together?
I opened my mouth to ask him when he looked up, finally breaking eye-contact with me and said, “Here it is. This is my place.”
54
I dragged my eyes away from his perfect face and was surprised to see that we were standing in front of an old abandoned train car—a caboose to be exact.
“You live here?” I asked, and I couldn’t quite keep the surprise out of my voice.
“It’s not much to look at from the outside,” he admitted. “But I have done some things over the years to make the inside much more livable.”
He put me down for a moment, though he kept a proprietary arm around me, and brought me up a set of three wooden steps which led to the back end of the old caboose. There was a tall, narrow door set in the wood and Griffin pushed it open easily and ushered me inside.
It was too dark to see anything and for a moment my heart began to skitter in my chest. Had I been foolish, coming all the way out here with him? Was it really incredibly stupid of me to go into a dark space alone with him, without telling any of my friends or my aunt where I had gone?
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