by Ginna Gray
❧
Katy turned her head and glanced at the illuminated dial of the bedside clock. One fifteen. With a disgusted sigh she threw back the covers and slipped out of bed. The silken folds of her nightgown fluttered soundlessly around her ankles as she walked barefoot across the carpet to the window. Drawing back the lacy curtains, Katy stared morosely out into the darkness.
Moonlight filtered through the huge oak tree by the drive, casting a dappled pattern of light and shadows across the manicured lawn. From behind the house, hidden in the dense forest, came the incessant, high-pitched hum of a thousand nameless insects. A movement caught her eyes, and as Katy watched, a small furry animal scampered across the grass and disappeared into the shrubbery.
The quiet was nerve-wracking. Katy shifted restlessly and stared up at the black velvet sky.
This was the fourth night in a row that she hadn't been able to sleep. And she knew why. The simple truth of the matter was that she missed Trace. Dreadfully.
She had grown accustomed to falling asleep in his arms, with the sound of his strong heartbeat beneath her ear and the warm comfort of his hard body pressed against hers. Without him that enormous bed was just a cold empty space.
And it wasn't only at night that she felt this grinding loneliness. She missed him every minute of the day, even during those times, like at work, when she normally didn't see him. Since the moment he had disappeared down the drive, pulling that long stock trailer full of horses behind his truck, she had walked around feeling as though her heart were encased in lead. And she hadn't been in the least successful in hiding her feelings. Jane had noticed her unhappiness only that morning. In her usual, forthright manner, she had gotten right to the heart of the problem.
"Sweetie, if you don't like the pattern on these dishes, just say so and I'll buy some new ones. There's no need to scrub it off."
It took several seconds for Jane's voice to penetrate, but finally Katy turned her head and gave her friend a blank look, her blue eyes slightly out of focus. "What?"
"You've been washing that same plate for the last five minutes," Jane explained with exasperated amusement.
"Oh! I'm sorry. My mind must have been wandering." Hastily, Katy swished the dish through the rinse water and placed it in the rack.
"Your mind isn't wandering, doll, it's taken a hike. You've been off in some world of your own for the past three days. What's the matter? Did you have a fight with that dreamy man you married?"
Katy pulled the plug in the sink and watched the water whirlpool down the drain. "No, of course not. Anyway, that would be a bit difficult, since he left Tuesday morning to deliver some Thoroughbreds to a rancher in California."
"Ah-ha! Now the light dawns!" Jane crowed in triumph. "I knew it had something to do with Trace. For two months you've been absolutely glowing with happiness. Now, all of a sudden, the light has gone out of you and you're walking around like a zombie." She cocked her head to one side and narrowed her eyes shrewdly. "You're missing that man like hell, aren't you?"
"No—yes—I mean . . ." Katy's stammered denial trailed away to nothing in the face of Jane's smug grin. Sighing heavily, she walked to the couch and sank down in one corner, her shoulders drooping. Her eyes remained fixed on her plucking fingers as they toyed absently with a loose thread in the upholstered arm. She sent up a prayer that one of the kids would wake up and give her an excuse to escape. There wasn't a hope in hell that Jane would just let the matter drop.
Katy risked a quick glance at her friend, then wished she hadn't. Jane was still standing there with her hands on her hips, watching her with that I-dare-you-to-deny-it smirk on her face.
"Oh, all right. You win. So maybe I do miss him a little," Katy admitted grudgingly. "We've been married over two months now and . . . and"—she paused and shrugged—"we've become friends and I'm used to having him around. That's all."
"Horse feathers!" Jane snorted succinctly. "When a friend goes on a trip you say 'so long, Charlie' and go on about your business. Only when you're in love do you count the days until a man returns."
A high-pitched wail from the nursery drew Jane toward the door. With her hand on the knob, she stopped and looked back at Katy's stunned face. "Think about it, Katy," she said softly.
Well, she'd thought about it all right. With a sigh, Katy let the lacy pane! fall back into place and turned toward the lonely bed. Since Jane had made that astounding observation she had thought of nothing else.
And slowly, relentlessly, the truth had forced its way to the surface. She was in love with Trace.
Katy stretched out full length on the bed and stared through the darkness at the ceiling. How had it happened? When had she lost her fear of Trace? In two months' time she had gone from lying in his arms like a slab of granite, to the point where she could not sleep without him by her side.
Looking back on the past two months, Katy realized there had been no one occasion that had marked the change in their relationship; it had been a gradual process. With infinite care and patience, Trace had shown her repeatedly that she could trust him. As that trust had grown, her fear had receded. Those horror-filled moments in the woods would probably always haunt her to some extent, but she knew now that she could no longer equate Trace's touch with the vile, unspeakable things those two men had tried to do to her. There was not even the vaguest similarity between their violent lust and her husband's tender, passionate love.
Once her fear had been conquered, it had been impossible to hold in check the powerful attraction that had always existed between them. Each night, when Trace held her in his arms, it became more and more difficult for her to pull away before their lovemaking reached its ultimate conclusion. Her body ached for the fulfillment only Trace could give.
A delicious shiver raced through Katy's body as she recalled the heart-stopping sensations Trace could so easily arouse in her. With a look or touch he could turn her bones to water. When he held her and kissed her as though he would draw her into his very soul, nothing else in the world mattered.
Yet, for a while, Katy had stubbornly refused to admit that the attraction between them was anything more than physical. It was easier that way. Physical attraction could be denied fulfillment; love could not.
But she could no longer ignore her feelings. It had taken only these few days apart for her to realize that without him she was miserable. What was it Trace had said? When you find that one right person it's like finding your other half? Katy smiled. He was certainly right about that.
Rolling onto her side, Katy buried her face in Trace's pillow, then groaned. Mattie had changed the sheets that morning and the clean linens smelled only of soap and the freshness of outdoors. Now even Trace's scent was missing.
Her longing for him had reached an intensity that was painful. As she lay there staring into the darkness, feeling sick with need, Katy made the most momentous, most difficult decision of her life. It could no longer be avoided or postponed. When Trace returned she would let him know that she loved him, and that she was ready for their marriage to be a real one. How she would do it, she hadn't the slightest idea. She couldn't quite see herself just walking up to him and blurting it out.
With a sigh, Katy hugged his pillow against her chest. Somehow she'd find a way. They couldn't go on like this.
Chapter 10
Late in the afternoon on the day Trace was due to return, Katy stood at the kitchen sink, deftly peeling potatoes. Every few seconds her restless gaze darted out the window toward the stables. He would have to go there first to unhitch the horse trailer, she knew. The thought of seeing Trace again made Katy almost faint with excitement.
Her eagerness had made her haunt the kitchen all day, since the windows in that room afforded the best view of the stables and back road. After about her tenth visit, Mattie had finally become so exasperated over finding her underfoot constantly that she had tied an apron around Katy's waist and put her to work. Katy didn't mind. She was grateful for an excuse to stay.
As she reached for another potato, Katy's eyes were drawn irresistibly to the window once again. The familiar blue truck was just rolling to a stop beside the stables. Her heart gave a little leap and the potato peeler clattered into the sink. Katy stood frozen for a moment, then her feet were carrying her toward the back door. En route the apron was snatched off and tossed over the back of a chair. Oblivious to Mattie's knowing grin, she pushed open the screen door and loped down the back steps two at a time.
Katy's heart was pounding with anticipation as she started across the yard. With each step she was walking faster and faster, until by the time she was halfway there she was running.
Trace was just rounding the front of the truck as Katy approached the stables. Catching sight of him, she was suddenly overcome by a fit of intense shyness and skidded to a halt several feet away.
Trace spotted her at the same moment and stopped too, his eyes flaring like dry kindling. "Katy." Her name came out on a breathless sigh. Katy wasn't even sure she'd heard it.
They stood absolutely still, staring at one another. An expectant siience hung in the air between them.
For the past week Katy had planned exactly what she was going to say, exactly how she was going to behave when Trace returned. Now, every carefully rehearsed word flitted right out of her mind. Her brain simply refused to function.
The hazel-green eyes made a quick, avid search of her face and figure. Surprise flickered in their depths as he noted her heaving chest and flushed cheeks. Then, slowly, a devastating smile curved his mouth, and he broke the tense silence with a husky, "Hello, Katy."
Katy stared back at him with wide, hungry eyes. His sandy hair was windblown into an attractive disarray. The chambray work shirt, stretched taut across his hard, muscled chest and broad shoulders, seemed to emphasize his primitive masculine appeal. His loose-jointed stance was deceptively casual, but his eyes were alert as he watched Katy's silent struggle.
Her insides were fluttering like snowflakes in a storm. The desire to touch him was so strong it was almost irresistible, but her feet seemed to be rooted to the spot. She couldn't force a sound through her aching throat.
From the corner of her eye she saw her father emerge from the stables. Taking in the situation at a glance, he stopped short and placed his hands on his hips. "For heaven's sake, Katy girl!" his gruff voice chided. "What are you waiting for? Give the man a proper welcome."
Katy's uncertain gaze went from Trace to her father, then back. The look in the hazel eyes echoed Tom's words, and when Trace opened his arms wide she obeyed the command. With a joyful cry, she sped across the intervening space and flung herself against his chest.
She was lifted clear off the ground as their lips met in a long, burning kiss. His arms crushed her so tightly that Katy could barely breathe, but she didn't care. Winding her arms around his neck, she thrust her hands into his hair and pulled him closer.
Katy's uninhibited response seemed to release a floodgate in Trace. He kissed her with all the pent-up need of a man long denied, the fierce, driving hunger of the past months surging to the surface. Katy responded instinctively, glorying in the possessive, passionate demand.
Finally, the initial torrent spent, the kiss gentled into a long, exquisitely tender exploration that left them both weak and trembling. When at last their clinging lips parted, Trace allowed her body to slide downward until her feet touched the ground. His arms remained around her, holding her close, as he buried his face in the silky fall of her hair.
"Oh, sweetheart, I've missed you like hell," he muttered raggedly against her neck, breathing in the very essence of her. "But, dear heaven! It was worth every lonely hour just to have you greet me like this."
Katy smiled as she snuggled deeper into his arms. His shirt was unbuttoned halfway to his waist. Without conscious thought, she wound her arms tightly around his lean middle and pressed her face against his chest. A delicious shudder rippled through her as she buried her nose in the cloud of curling hair and inhaled deeply of his masculine scent. Trace's arms tightened, and Katy closed her eyes, utterly content. This was where she belonged.
The truck engine roaring into sudden life jolted them back to their surroundings. Surprised, they turned to find Tom beaming down at them from the pickup's cab.
"Don't mind me," he drawled. "I'm just going to take the trailer down to the barn and clean it out." With a casual wave, he put the truck in gear and drove away, the empty horse trailer bouncing and rattling along behind.
The knowing twinkle in her father's eyes had brought a flush to Katy's face but Trace didn't seem in the least disconcerted. Smiling that crooked little half smile that made her stomach flutter, he drew her close and fitted her tightly against his side. With his arm curved around her shoulders and hers around his waist, they turned and walked toward the house.
Later that night, as she sat before her dressing table, mercilessly dragging a brush through her hair while she waited for Trace to emerge from the bathroom, Katy was as taut as a drawn bow.
It was one thing to decide, with the safety of hundreds of miles between them, that the time had come to make their marriage a real one. Following through en the decision was something else again. She loved Trace. She had no doubts about that. And her body pulsed with a deep, burning need that only his complete possession could satisfy. Yet fear, insidious, mind-choking fear, was slowly twining its curling tendrils through her.
It wasn't a fear of Trace; she knew that he would never hurt her. It was a fear of the unknown. Giving yourself completely over to another person, experiencing the ultimate intimacy, was something Katy had never even contemplated until a week ago.
The sudden opening of the bathroom door brought an end to her self-torment. Katy's heart kicked painfully against her ribs as she watched Trace's mirrored image become inexorably larger.
He was clad in only a towel, which draped low from his hips. The sculptured beauty of his chest and shoulders made Katy's pulse race. In the soft light from the bedside lamp his naked skin glowed like polished bronze, its smooth surface broken only by the V-shaped pattern of burnished gold chest hairs.
Purposefully, relentlessly, his intent gaze never once leaving her, he moved across the lush carpet. When he came to a halt, only a few inches separated them.
A shiver rippled through Katy as their eyes met in the mirror and his hands settled warmly on her bare shoulders. She inhaled the intoxicating mixture of pine soap and clean male scent that emanated from him. Through the thin silk of her gown she could feel the heat of his body all across her back.
There was no mistaking the message in his eyes. Trace had not misread the silent invitation in her uninhibited greeting, in the hungry looks she had given him all through dinner.
"Let's go to bed, Katy,' he whispered with husky sensuality. "I want to hold you."
For a painful few seconds Katy's lungs refused to function. Then, mesmerized by the burning look in those deep-set eyes, drawn by a need even stronger than the curling fear in the pit of her stomach, she allowed him to lift her from the stool and lead her, trembling and silent, to the bed.
The light covering was thrown back, and as Katy slid obediently into the enormous bed, the lamp was clicked off. There was a soft plop as the towel hit the carpet, then the mattress tilted under Trace's weight. Powerful, sinewy arms reached out and gathered her close, molding her intimately against the hard, masculine body, his naked flesh burning its imprint into her through the silk gown.
"Oh, Katy, Katy. I feel as though I've waited all my life for this," Trace breathed against her lips just before his mouth claimed them.
The kiss was both passionate and tender, demanding and entreating, and Katy's lips blossomed under it like a bud unfurling beneath the sun. A soft moan escaped her as he explored the silken sweetness of her mouth with excruciating sensuality. She felt his tongue tracing her lips, delicately probing the sensitive membranes on the inside of her cheek. Trace had kissed her passionately many times but
always before there had been that element of restraint, of rigid control. No more. He made no effort to curb his desire, and under the questing kiss, Katy felt her own control slipping, the last remnant of doubt and fear fading into oblivion.
"Oh, God, how I love you," he murmured thickly as his mouth trailed across her cheek. Katy was beyond reply, her body shivering deliciously as his tongue traced the convoluted swirls of her ear. His broad hand ceased its rhythmic caress of her hip to glide slowly upward. It paused briefly at the indented curve of her waist, then again to cup the warm fullness of her breast, before moving, with sure determination, to her shoulder. One at a time, the thin straps of her gown were moved aside, and the slippery material was lowered to her waist.
He drew back to look at her. Moonlight filtered through the lacy curtains at the window. In its dim, silvery glow his eyes burned feverishly.
"Beautiful. You're so beautiful."
His hand curved possessively around one breast, his fingers stroking softly over the curving slope.
Then Katy gasped and her mind went spinning out of control as his lips captured the rosy tip and tugged gently. Her flesh responded instantly, forming a hard bud of desire, achingly tight and tender.
Palm flat, fingers extended, his hand moved onto her quivering stomach, and instinctively Katy's body arched upward, liquid heat surging through her veins.
Her hands moved restlessly over the corded muscles in his neck and shoulders. "Trace. Oh, Trace," she moaned softly, lost to everything but the driving need that pulsed through her.
"I know, sweetheart. I know."
Abandoning her breasts, his mouth forged a moist trail upward, pausing on the way to delicately trace her collarbone and nibble at the underside of her jaw. Katy was caught in the exquisite rapture of the slow, tantalizing caress, and she waited breathlessly for his mouth to reclaim hers.