“Oh God! Aaron, no,” she shook her head and turned to Andrew, tears streaming along her cheeks. “He wouldn’t do that to me... to us.”
Madison could hear sobbing in the background and knew that Olivia was crying as well. She breathed in deeply, not willing to accept that this was happening. There was another explanation. She would get a second opinion. Whatever it took.
“He wanted to leave the hospital to get high,” Aaron said sadly, bringing Madison out of her thoughts. “His body is speaking for him right now. All he can think about is the drug and how to get it.”
“I don’t believe that,” she said shaking her head again. “He won’t use again. He knows what I went through with my dad. No!” she stated adamantly. “He loves me. He won’t. I know it.”
“Madison,” Aaron said lightly as he laid his hand on her shoulder.
Madison ignored him and ran her own hand along Andrew’s. “If you don’t believe in him you should leave.”
“Madison,” Olivia started but was stopped by Aaron.
“Olivia, it’s okay. Come on. Let her have time with him.”
Madison heard footsteps retreating but she didn’t look up. She regretted saying what she had, but, right now, she was not having it. She would not let her mind wrap around the idea that Andrew would use again. It wasn’t possible. Not after everything they had been through together. She was confident of that. She stood up and kissed his lips softly.
“I believe in you, Helios.”
~*~
Madison watched Andrew’s restless sleep. It had been a few hours since she had been there. Aaron had said that Andrew had a sedative a few hours before and that it usually took a couple of hours to wear off which was what she was witnessing now. It was difficult to watch him like this. Her brain and heart were at odds with one another. She desperately wanted to believe that love would stop him from using, but, deep down, she knew that it couldn’t. Yet, she refused to let doubt take hold. If that made her naïve, then so be it. She had to have faith that he would be okay. It was the only way.
“Madison,” Andrew began to mutter while his head moved side to side.
“I’m here, baby,” she said, holding his hand.
His eyes slowly opened and Madison felt as if her heart would explode from happiness. It had seemed a lifetime that he was asleep. She ignored the fact that his eyes were dilated and dark or the fact his expression was not the same one he always bore when looking at her. She knew he was hurting and she would help him any way she could. He raised his hand but was stopped by the restraints. Thinking he wanted to hold her, Madison unstrapped his wrist but instead of touching her he immediately began scratching at his arm. He then pulled out the IV and unstrapped his other restraint.
“Andrew... NO!” she cried out as he swung his legs over the side of the bed.
She ran around the bed and stood in front of him. He was focused on getting out of there, not on the woman in front of him. He easily moved her out of the way and stood up but she worked her way in front of him again and pushed him back so that he was sitting on the bed. Startled by this, he frowned before rising again. Except this time the quick movement made him feel dizzy and he dropped to the ground, falling on his knees.
“Helios.”
Madison quickly kneeled down in front of him. He was breathing heavily and seemed completely lost and unsure of himself. Not the confident and loving man she was used to looking upon. It broke her heart to see this side of him. She sat completely on the floor and pulled him into her embrace. As much as he wanted to, he didn’t fight it or her. And although his body wanted to leave, to get out of the room and the building where he could score, he couldn’t move. She was an anchor holding him in place. He stopped resisting and instead wrapped his arms around her waist as his head fell onto her lap.
“I love you so much,” she said, touching his hair tenderly.
It was then that she heard and felt it. He was crying, no, not crying, sobbing. Gut wrenching tears released from his aching body. They came with such a force that it caused his whole body to shake with the strength of his heartache. It was a terrifying sound to hear. This was something she had never heard from him before. Something she never wanted to hear again. Having heard movement, she looked up and saw that Connor was pacing frantically in the room. He looked panicked and distressed but Madison couldn’t help him. She couldn’t offer him any words of encouragement at this time. Her focus had to be on Andrew. He was all that mattered.
“We’ll fight this, baby. You and I. Together.”
Andrew was overcome with sadness and despair. His world felt like it was crumbling around him. He had no way to describe what was going on within him. The battle raging for his soul. All he knew was that it felt as if he were in an alley and there was activity all around him. Left and right people were telling him to come with them. Saying that they knew the way. They told him that they could take his pain away and make his sorrow vanish into thin air. He was confused but he noticed something toward the end of the alley. Ahead of him was a figure. It was indiscernible but yet still familiar. In his heart, he knew who it was. He couldn’t see the figures face but he was certain that it was Madison. She was reaching her hand out to him, beckoning him but his feet wouldn’t move.
“I love you so much, Helios. We’ve been through everything together and we will get through this as well. Don’t give up, baby, please. We can do anything as long as we are together,” Madison pleaded for him to come back to her.
In his mind, he looked down and saw that his tried and true kit was sitting in his palm. He turned it in his hand. It was the one he had used from the very beginning. The one he never shared. His only friend during the darkest of times. He kneeled down and opened it. The familiarity was comforting. He immediately took out the needle, staring at it with both longing and despair. He heard a sound and was distracted by it. He stood up and looked around trying to ascertain where the noise was coming from. That’s when he realized it was emanating from the figure ahead of him. He dropped the needle and kit and tried to focus on the figure he had determined was Madison. He suddenly found his feet moving towards her and what sounded like singing.
She gently stroked his hair, avoiding the area that was bandaged. She was trying to calm him but he seemed inconsolable. His arms were wound tightly around her while his body continued to shake and spasm. She closed her eyes and concentrated on him. She wasn’t sure how to help but she soon found herself humming a familiar song, a song about hope and healing, about being there for someone and helping them heal. She gently rocked back and forth, cradling the man she loved more than anything. She began to sing softly to him, hoping he could really hear her. She needed him to come back.
She heard movement in the room again but she never opened her eyes. Andrew was her only concern and whatever she was doing was working because his crying had been reduced to barely audible whimpers. She continued to hum the chorus as he tightened his grip around her and it was only when he took a deep breath that she opened her eyes. She glanced to see who was in the room and saw a nurse who looked on the verge of tears herself as well as Olivia, Aaron, and Connor. The nurse approached them, kneeling down.
“We need to get him back in the bed, ma’am.”
“I know. Let me hold him a little bit longer, please.”
She nodded and stepped away. Madison saw her say something to Aaron and Olivia before walking out but she didn’t know what it was about. Madison turned her attention to Andrew again, and as she did, he rolled slightly so he could look up at her. His eyes were still wet from his tears but, more importantly, they were softer now, gentler. She was looking at her Andrew, her beloved. Her fingers traced along his face before she cupped his cheek.
“I won’t lose you, Helios. We’re in this together.”
Tears trickled out the corners of his eyes. He was in awe of her and deep down he knew she would always be there for him. His body ached though. Even as he stared at the beautiful woman above hi
m, he felt weak. His could still see the people in the alley. They were whispering to him, telling half-truths and lies as the vein in his left arm pulsed and throbbed, burning for some sort of relief.
“I’m scared,” he admitted reluctantly.
“I have faith in you.”
“I don’t know if I can fight it,” he replied despondently.
“WE can fight it... together. You’re not in this alone. I’m here with you, forever.”
“But I can’t stop thinking about it,” he said with difficulty.
“In time you will.”
He closed his eyes. He distinctly remembered how hard it had been to quit the first time. He had been in prison though and survival had actually outranked his desire to use. And as he recalled, the first several months were the worst. He had dreamed about using every night and on many occasions woke to find himself clawing at his arm. He had never wanted to die more than he did during that particular time in his life. He couldn’t imagine having Madison witness him going through that. He felt her hand on his cheek, stroking it softly, lovingly and he looked upon her once more. This time with tear filled eyes.
“You beat this before, Andrew, and you can do it again. I know you can.”
He wasn’t so sure about that. He remembered how awful he had been when he quit using. What he had done to get money just to get a fix and how many fights he had been in because he couldn’t control his cravings. He then remembered how horrible his father had been when he was jonesing. Some of the worst beatings that Andrew had endured was when his parents were coming off of drugs. His mind went into panic mode at the mere thought of how he might act with Madison. He didn’t want to take it out on her, but would he have control over that?
“I don’t want to hurt you,” he finally said as he sat up.
“You won’t. I believe in you, Andrew.”
He exhaled loudly before placing both hands on her face. “I love you, so much,” he said bringing his lips to hers.
They kissed softly, their lips moving slowly against one another. A dance they knew so well. The kiss wasn’t enflamed with passion and desire, but more gentle, an expression of the love they shared for one another. Andrew was still very confused. He didn’t know how to cope with his yearning to use again. When he and Madison had met, he had already been clean for eight years. He had only remembered struggling a few times since they had been together, but this felt different than those occasions. Right now, he felt out of control and that scared him more than he could articulate. He withdrew his lips from hers and rested his head on her shoulder. He couldn’t disappoint her. He wouldn’t allow that to happen. Somewhere within him he had to find the strength to fight this.
24 Defeated
“Madison,” Connor said, tapping her shoulder.
Madison ignored him and continued to stare at Andrew. They had gotten him back in the bed several hours ago and now he seemed to be resting comfortably. Well, as comfortably as he was capable of, considering the situation. The doctors had visited with her forty minutes ago and indicated that they would be moving him out of the ICU soon. She was taking that as a positive sign that maybe the worst was over. She was praying for that to be the case.
“Elias is here. He needs to talk to you. I can stay in here with Andrew so you guys can discuss stuff in private.”
Madison shook her head. “I don’t want to leave Andrew. Can you just have him come in here?”
“Sure. I’ll be right back,” Connor said, as he heading out the door.
Madison knew that what Elias had to say was important but she was struggling to focus on anything other than Andrew and what he was going through. She heard the gentle cadence of dress shoes hitting the linoleum floor, marking Elias’s entrance into the room. He obviously hadn’t changed yet. The footsteps walked to the opposite side of the bed and stopped. As Elias approached the bed, he looked down at Andrew, his brows furrowed. He looked awful, pale and sickly. Elias breathed in deeply and turned his gaze to Madison.
“I have people working on the emails. I was told that we could trace the IP address to determine when and where the emails were sent from. That would prove that they all originated from New York and likely from either Kurtis or Nolan’s computer. Unfortunately, they don’t think they can have the information for another couple of days unless we could get our hands on the IP addresses of both yours and their computers. Otherwise, he said he could go through some,” Elias waved his hand, “back door or something or other. I’m not that familiar with computers or the terminology but the bottom line is that we will be able to trace it. So that’s good.”
Madison simply nodded. That was good. It was obvious that she hadn’t sent anything to Kurtis so having someone prove that would be important to the case. She continued to run her fingertips along Andrew’s face. Her mind was elsewhere as Elias began to speak again.
“The testimony is going to be difficult to dispute as it comes down to their word against yours. Since Kurtis is dead we have no way to counter anything that Nolan testified to. Which, to be honest, is pretty damaging. He stated that he commissioned you to work on the STES account while you lived in California. He indicated that after transferring the case to Kurtis he decided that it required someone with more expertise, which he felt was you. He further reported that he spoke with you at length and that you agreed to oversee the account for a substantial fee. He went on to say that it was decided that Kurtis would serve as the front man, meeting with people if need be, but you would be the one that approved all the transfers and setup the offshore accounts.”
Madison looked up from Andrew for a moment and sighed.
“But that’s not the worst part.”
“There’s a worst part?” Madison asked sadly.
Elias watched her from across the bed. She already looked defeated. Granted, after court today he had been overwhelmed with the enormity of evidence they had against them. This would not be an easy case to win and he didn’t have the resources in New York that he did in California. Although, he was able to utilize his computer expert at his office which was good because he trusted him completely and a couple of days with him really meant he would likely have the information tomorrow morning. He stole a glance at Andrew.
“Yes, I’m afraid there is a worst part.”
Madison sighed. “What is it?” she asked, afraid to even imagine what could be worse.
Elias rested his hands on the railing on the bed, noticing that Andrew had his wrists in restraints. He briefly tried to imagine why they would strap him down and then became saddened with the thought that maybe it was to protect him against himself. He sighed and glanced at Madison’s forlorn and distraught face. This was not good! He tapped the railing of Andrew’s bed nervously.
“Nolan testified that he never paid you directly for your services but instead transferred money into an offshore account per your request. He stated he didn’t know what you did with the money, but, in hindsight, he probably should have been monitoring a bit more because obviously he put his trust in the wrong person,” Elias stated annoyed.
Madison finally looked over at him. She shook her head slightly and closed her eyes. This was getting crazier by the minute. Now she understood why Elias had looked so upset when she came in the courtroom earlier today. Nolan was throwing her under the bus without a care in the world. She wondered if that had been their plan all along or if they were implementing some form of Plan B since Kurtis was no longer here to do his part of their Machiavellian scheme.
“Why didn’t that prosecutor ask me about this so called account earlier today?” Madison finally asked, her voice full of anger.
“Mr. Lewis provided me with the information an hour ago. He states he will present it to the grand jury tomorrow. He was waiting on confirmation before bringing it up.” Elias sighed woefully. “Madison, there’s over a million dollars in it. I’m not going to lie, that’s pretty damaging evidence against you.”
Madison turned away from Elias and looked ba
ck at Andrew, not saying anything. She started running her fingers through the top of his hair and then grabbed the washcloth she had been using to keep him cool. He was still going through withdrawals and therefore perspiring a lot as his body fought the cravings. She carefully dabbed some cool water from the pitcher by the bed on the washcloth and wiped his brow.
“The only advantage I can see,” Elias paused as he watched her lovingly take care of Andrew. It reminded him of when he had to take care of Liam and more recently Callie taking care of Jayden. He swallowed and continued. “The advantage I can see is that there didn’t appear to be a signature on the document that one normally signs when an account is opened. Mr. Lewis will have a difficult time explaining that to the jury. Has anyone tried to get you to sign anything?”
Madison shrugged. “No, but maybe that’s why they wanted to meet with me.”
Elias nodded. “Yes, I can see that. They would have wanted an actual signature on that form prior to trial. I’m looking into it. I have some calls out but don’t have a lot of details just yet. Liam states those types of accounts can be opened with verbal consent but the signature should have been obtained afterwards. The problem is, that sometimes the jury only sees a large sum of money. They don’t look further than that so we will have to battle that negative perception if this case goes to trial, which, unfortunately, at this rate we can assume it will.”
Madison could hear Elias talking but, in truth, she had stopped actually listening to him. She knew it was foolish but she couldn’t think about herself anymore. In reality, that philosophy was clearly a mistake, for how could she help Andrew if she was sent to jail for a crime she didn’t commit? She couldn’t go there, though. Her mind wouldn’t allow her to. Her worry and fear for Andrew crowded out all sense of self preservation.
“Madison,” Elias said softly, touching her shoulder.
He had that fatherly essence about him and Madison was overcome. She wrapped her arms around him and held him tightly, as tight as she would have held her own father had he been there. She knew it probably came as a surprise to Elias but he didn’t seem to object. Instead, he held her close as any father would do for their distressed child.
Helios Renewed (The Helios Chronicles #3) Page 26