“Being with you is definitely on my list of things to look forward to.” I poke him in the ribs, as he laughs at my silliness. We’ve been less active since my surgery six weeks ago. The doctor said there was no reason not to have sex, but between the lingering soreness of my breast and our persistent worrying, we haven’t really been up to the challenge. But having gotten the best news in the world today does wonders for both of our sex drives.
He scoops me up in his arms and drops me on his lap. “Why wait for the new year?” His words take on a sexy tone suddenly. The raspy throatiness of his words washes across my skin. Only Evan has the power to arouse me with a simple question.
He pulls my face into his, crashing his lips into mine. His tongue sweeps against the seam of my lips and I open to him immediately. Our tongues thrash together, stoking the flames of our instantaneous desire. His hands slide under my top and unclasp my bra. In a heated rush, he removes both of them and tosses them on the floor. With the softest touch, he skims just his fingertips over my breasts before holding them in his hands. There’s a newfound reverence to his touch as if he’s actually worshipping my body. As he leans his head to kiss my small scar, I entwine my fingers into his silver-streaked hair.
As he licks and kisses my nipples, he stands and carries us over to the floor in front of the fireplace − back to the place where it all began.
Wordlessly, we relieve each other of the rest of our clothing, warmed only by the flickering flames behind us. With his mouth still firmly sealed over mine, he lowers us to the floor where his kisses rain down all over my body, bringing my desire to life like a warm spring shower rejuvenates everything it touches.
As he toys with the hardened tips of my breasts, sparks of lust zing across my body—they all settle in between my legs. I feel his cock pulsing against my stomach and I know he’s holding back on his own pleasure just to bring me my own first.
His tongue trails down my body, dipping into my belly button, before going lower still. His finger trace through my sex before plunging deep inside. “You’re always so wet for me, love.” He works me like a magician does his favorite trick. Hitting the perfect spot at the perfect time, the motion of his thumb is flawlessly in sync with the swirling of his fingers inside.
“Evan!” I bellow his name and I drive my body down onto his hand, needing to feel more of him. That’s just what he gives me. His mouth replaces his thumb and he draws the tightly wound bundle of nerves in between his lips. The rapid lashing of his tongue against my clit drives me wild—it tightens my nipples and makes my inner walls clench with the need to come like I’ve never felt before.
When he looks up at me, his mouth still tightly latched over my pulsating clit, I lose it. Desire tightens everything in my body, from my toes all the way up to my teeth as they clamp down on my lip. “I’m coming, Evan. God, I’m coming.”
As my orgasm barrels through me, he quickly settles in between my legs and buries himself into my still-fluttering sex. “I needed to be inside of you. I needed to feel you pull me deep into you − to be right here with you.” He pushes over and over again as he lowers to his elbows, resting them on either side of my head.
“I need you, too.”
Our eyes never break away from one another, and even though we speak no words, we communicate a lifetime’s worth of love in that passionate gaze. Our kiss, while so familiar, is brand new at the same time. His thrusts, driving deeper and harder by the second, never allow the waves of my orgasm to recede. As one crashes into the next, he slides his arms under my shoulders and holds me to his chest. My legs wrap around his hips and then climb higher still, allowing him to bury himself deeper and deeper still.
“Lucy!” he calls out, spilling his orgasm into me, his hips still thrusting rhythmically.
Afterward, we lie in front of the fire, a blanket draped over us as he’s spooned up behind me, gently stroking my hair. From the other side of the room, we hear the faint cheers of the crowd on the television as they count down to one.
“Happy New Year, love,” he whispers in my ear as the crowd on TV erupts into a loud roar of celebration. After pressing a soft kiss to the shell of my ear, I roll over to face him. Just as I snuggle into his warm chest, he reaches behind his head to grab something.
He places a small, red velvet ring box in between us and my heart beats a wild tempo in my chest. “Oh, my God.” My excitement rises as we both move, now sitting Indian-style facing one another.
He takes my hand in his as a sincere, yet lopsided and sexy grin pulls at the corners of his mouth. “Lucy, I love you, and there’s nothing in the world that would make me happier than being with you for the rest of our lives.” He picks up the small box and cracks it open before presenting it to me in the palm of his hand. “I’ve had this picked out for a long time now and I’ve wanted to ask you so many times, but you deserved to have me ask you today when you knew for certain that you had the rest of your life to give to me.”
Tears of happiness − no, scratch that − of complete and utter contentment fall from my eyes as he pulls the beautiful ring out of the box. Before fitting it on my finger, he stares up into my eyes. “Lucy, be my wife, please. Will you marry me?”
“Yes, yes, yes,” I repeat as he slides the ring on my finger. I wrap my arms around his neck with enough might to strangle him if I really wanted to. Holding my hand out behind us, I stare in awe at the ring he picked out for me. He must mistake my silence for dissatisfaction, because as he pulls away from me, he makes the most ridiculous offer I’ve ever heard of.
“If you don’t like it, we can exchange it. I brought the girls with me . . .”
I use my lips to silence him. “You silly man you. Exchange it? Never in a million years. And that you thought enough to include Melanie and Maddy, means more to me than you’ll ever know. I just . . . I’m so in love with you − I just don’t know what to say.”
“There’s nothing to say, love. You already said the only word I needed to hear. All we have to do now is just be.”
And that’s exactly what we’ll do. We’ll spend our days being in love with each other, until we run out of love; something, I think is safe to say will never happen.
The End
Acknowledgements
When I started this series, I created Momma with the perfect “mother” image in mind − kind, caring, loving, understanding. Her story wasn’t initially clear in my head. I knew she had lost her husband and I knew she deserved love. I just didn’t know the in between stuff. Lucy (not Momma) started to come to life as I was writing Let Love Heal. She became more than a mom and I started to get really excited about her story. It was truly just some random strokes upon the keyboard that brought Lucy and Evan together − a momentary and fleeting decision that really brought this book to life.
Perhaps that’s the most amazing thing about writing: you never know what the story is until it writes itself.
And then, there’s Evan—oh, Lord. Where do I begin with Evan? He is perhaps the most true-to-life character I’ve ever written. I lost my uncle, Lt. David Halderman, on 9/11 and my father, also a Battalion Chief in the FDNY, spent the months following 9/11 sorting through the rubble at Ground Zero looking for his younger brother. Like Evan, my father also had to retire early because of the lung damage he sustained. For these and so many other reasons, Evan will always hold a very special place in my heart.
I have super amazing beta readers who help me so much. Pam Schaeffer, Jennifer Diaz, Jennifer Short—Benson, Michelle Stratton, S. Moose, Emily Minton and Kristy Bruno − thank you all so much for your feedback and for loving my characters as much as I do. An extra special thank you goes out to Nasha Lama and Ashely Griffieth for some of the most beautiful teasers I’ve ever seen.
Carey Heywood − I love your friggin’ face, wife! You are seriously my savior and often my voice of reason.
Michele Molitor − I wish there were words bigger than “I love you” to let you know how much you mean in my life. Tha
nk you for writing the dedication line for this book and for just being you. I know you will always carry his heart with yours and I know you will always speak to him in the quiet hours of the sunrise.
Let Love Be would be a very rough version of the one you’ve just read without the wonderful talent of Becky Johnson and her team at Hot Tree Editing. Thank you for taking my words and cleaning them up. I promise you, I am not a Cyborg (though, that sounds an awful lot like what a Cyborg who doesn’t want to be revealed as a Cyborg would say). Hmmmm?
Toski and Sommer − I love you girls hard! This cover is, simply put, utterly gorgeous. Thank you for bringing Lucy and Evan to life.
Tami with Integrity Formatting − thank you for taking this very plain and simple Word document and making it so unbelievably pretty.
There are just too many bloggers to list, but please know that every time you share something of mine, post a review, or just recommend me to a reader, I fall in love with you a little bit more. Thank you also to my street team. You are so much more than a group of fans. In the months that we’ve had the group, you’ve all become my friends and for that, I’m hugely grateful.
To my husband − I cried so many tears writing Lucy’s story because, in short, it made me have to envision how I would feel if you were no longer a part of my life. I love you with everything that I have and I always will.
Let Love Live Table of Contents
Master Table of Contents
Let Love In
Let Love Stay
Let Love Heal
Let Love Shine
Let Love Be
Let Love Live
Prologue ~ Dylan
Part One ~ Before
Chapter 1 ~ Dylan
Chapter 2 ~ Shane
Chapter 3 ~ Dylan
Chapter 4 ~ Shane
Chapter 5 ~ Dylan
Chapter 6 ~ Shane
Chapter 7 ~ Dylan
Chapter 8 ~ Shane
Chapter 9 ~ Dylan
Chapter 10 ~ Shane
Chapter 11 ~ Dylan
Chapter 12 ~ Shane
Chapter 13 ~ Dylan
Part Two ~ After
Chapter 14 ~ Dylan
Chapter 15 ~ Conner
Chapter 16 ~ Dylan
Chapter 17 ~ Conner
Chapter 18 ~ Dylan
Chapter 19 ~ Conner
Chapter 20 ~ Dylan
Chapter 21 ~ Conner
Chapter 22 ~ Dylan
Chapter 23 ~ Conner
Chapter 24 ~ Dylan
Chapter 25 ~ Conner
Part Three ~ Forever
Chapter 26 ~ Conner
Epilogue ~ Dylan
Bonus Scene—Dylan
Acknowledgements
Other Works
Social Media Links
Dedication
For those who deserve to be loved . . . no matter who they love
Prologue
May 15, 2015
“You sure you’re okay, Lizzie?” The tears tracking down her cheeks completely belie the subtle nod of her head. For the last few months, I’ve been meeting with Lizzie, a high school senior whose best friend was bullied so badly after he “came out” that he felt the need to run away. She received a letter from him this morning and she was more than a little shaken up over it, so she called me.
Swiping at her face, she looks up at me, her eyes red and puffy. After taking a deep, shuddery breath, the kind you take after crying for far too long, she grabs a tissue and blows her nose. With the renewed determination that’s usually on her young face, she sits up a bit straighter in her chair. “Yeah, I am okay, actually.” I think her words shock her more than me. “It sucks that Cane’s not here with me, that those guys were so mean to him that he had to leave, but he’s safe and that’s what I have to focus on. I’m trying to convince my parents to let me go visit him once school is over.”
“I think that would be great for both of you.” I glance over her shoulder at the clock above my office door. Shit, I’m really late. I’ve definitely missed the graduation ceremony, and if I don’t get my ass in gear, I’ll miss the party too.
Lizzie stands from her seat and I walk around my desk to escort her out. “You can call anytime. I’m here for you.” She awkwardly wraps her arms around me. After a quick hug, I can tell she feels better after having talked things out. This is why I love my job. Even though kids are bullied every day, and there’s no way to eradicate all of the ugly meanness in the world, I know when I counsel a kid who’s struggling, I am doing something good in the world.
“Thanks, Mr. Hopkins. I really appreciate it.” She grabs her bag from the floor where she dropped it rather unceremoniously two hours ago. “I’ll tell Cane you say hello.”
After Lizzie leaves, it takes me less than five minutes to get my crap together and close up the office. I check my phone once I get into my car and I’ve three missed calls and one angry text from Reid. He knows I’m a workaholic, so being late to a family event shouldn’t be that much of a surprise, but this is a big one, and I wasn’t even supposed to be at work today, either.
Dude, where the hell are you? Don’t bail on us again. This means a lot to Maddy and me.
Knowing they’re from Reid, I don’t even bother listening to the voicemails. Reid is my first boyfriend’s brother. We were childhood friends who lost touch for far too long, but in some twisted way, we found each other again. Now, Reid has become family to me, something he should have been a long time ago. Today, though, I’ve let him down. It’s his wife’s college graduation and I put work first. I don’t think Maddy will be too pissed, but apparently, that’s not the case with Reid.
The party is at Lucy and Evan’s house. Maddy moved in with her and her daughter after her aunt died during her senior year. Maddy’s parents died in a car accident when she was ten, so for all intents and purposes, Lucy is Maddy’s mother. Luckily, Lucy and Evan’s house isn’t all that far from The Bridge, the Gay Straight Alliance counseling center where I work. When I pull up in front of the house, I can hear the music playing from the backyard. Smoke is billowing up from what I’m assuming is the grill. It must mean Reid is cooking.
I take a minute in the car to put on my ‘family face.’ We all have it—the one you carefully slide into place when you want to hide what’s really going on, when you want to look like you don’t have a care in the world, even though the exact opposite is true.
After I click the gate at the side of the house closed, I walk toward Maddy, who is facing away from me, talking animatedly with her best friend, Melanie. She jumps a little when I drape my arm casually over her shoulder. Giving me the side-eye, she smirks. “Look who the cat dragged in.” She leans over and pops a quick kiss on my cheek. “Glad you could finally make it.” Girls are definitely not my strong point, but I can hear the snark in her words. Melanie hears it too, and after giving me a quick hug and whispering “good luck” into my ear, Melanie excuses herself to go find her boyfriend, Bryan.
I guess an apology is in order.
Crossing her arms across her chest, she stands there and waits for it. “I’m sorry, Maddy. I didn’t mean to miss everything.”
She sighs and unfolds her arms, some of the tension dissipating between us. “It’s not just about today, Dylan. The last few months you haven’t been yourself. Today’s supposed to be a happy day, and when you’re not here, we’re not happy.”
I find that hard to believe. Even though I do feel like part of the family, especially since my own parents recently moved down to Florida, saying that upstate New York was too cold for them. “Does it help that I bought you something?” I offer up her gift as an olive branch. She’s right; I haven’t been myself, but now is not the time to get into it. Needless to say, talking about it, whatever it is, with my best friend’s wife is not going to happen.
“It does if it’s sparkly.” Even though she tries to hide her excitement with a frown, her lips quirk up into a small smile.
I hand over the small
box. “You’ll have to open it and find out.” A chuckle bubbles past my lips as she tears through the paper like a kid on Christmas.
Holding the silver charm bracelet out in front of her, she looks at it dreamily. “It’s beautiful. Thank you so much.” With another quick kiss to the cheek, she says, “You’re forgiven.” I latch it onto her wrist and she plays with the charms, watching them catch little glints of the sunrays.
“But,” she draws out the word as she looks over my shoulder, “I doubt he’ll be shut up as easily,” she mutters as she tips her chin at Reid. For the second time in less than ten minutes, I’m wished “good luck.”
Reid claps a hand on my shoulder and squeezes . . . hard—harder than he should and I know he must be pissed. He should know better, though. We work together. He sees the shit I see. He knows firsthand what it’s like to deal with the bullies, to witness someone so disgusted by who they are they’d rather . . .
Pushing those thoughts back, I turn to face him and hold up my hands, palms out. “Before you say anything, Maddy already laid into me. I gave her jewelry and she’s okay now. I shouldn’t have been late and I’m sorry.”
Reid drops his hand and he manages a tight smile. “Fine. As long as she’s not pissed. That’s all that matters.” Crisis averted. Sometimes Reid just lets himself get all worked up over nothing. He hands me a beer and walks us over to table on the edge of the yard. They’ve got one of those party tents and bunch of plastic tablecloth-covered tables. There are balloons everywhere and groups of people are littered around the yard, lost in casual conversation—all here to celebrate Maddy and her accomplishment. All here for her because for so long, no one ever was.
I really am an ass for missing this for her.
“What the hell is going on with you lately?” Reid’s concerned question snaps through my thoughts. I take a pull on my beer and scrub a hand through my hair.
The Love Series Complete Box Set Page 110