"We were happy as children, Emmett. What went wrong?" He finally turned his gaze back to her. "I fell into a living hell and wanted everyone's company. I'm only happy when I know everyone else is miserable as well."
Tears came to her eyes. "Then you should be extremely happy, dear brother." "Aye," he agreed. "Only one thing can make me happier."
She knew to what he referred. "I'll not speak of it on this day. 'Tis a time for celebration." Isn't that what Father McCloud had said to her? For once he gave in to her. "Then pour me some of that wine, and we shall toast this day." Andrew was fast asleep in her arms. She gently laid him in his bed. Lovingly, she tucked his covers around him. It had been a long and exciting day for the lad, and he couldn't hold his eyes open. He fell asleep again at once.
"Good night, my sweet boy." She kissed his forehead, then blew out the candle by his bed. "You've avoided me all day, lass. I just wanted t' say good night." She could see Dwight's large outline against the doorway, but she could not see his face. She couldn't tell if he had been drinking heavily or not. His voice seemed quite clear.
"Good night, Uncle." She didn't move from Andrew's bedside. She wanted her uncle to leave first.
He stood for the longest time, as if waiting, as if wanting her to come out of the room. Finally, he moved on down the hall to his own rooms. Kolyn hated this, dreading her own uncle's company. Yet he made her uncomfortable. More than that, he frightened her. It was best she avoid any confrontations with him if she could.
Returning to her rooms, she crossed to her windows and spread the curtains aside. The snow still fell. She sat upon the sill and studied the cloud-ridden sky, masking all stars that might have brightened the blackness. Sudden longings assaulted her, robbing her of her will. She thought of strong arms curled around her, warming her, comforting her.
Guilt followed and collided with her tender feelings. It twisted into a ball of heartache and despair. Emmett would be delighted. She was miserable. A knock sounded at her door. "I need t' speak with you, lass."
Kolyn's heart sank. "'Tis late, Dwight. Can we speak in the morning?" There was a long pause, then he conceded, "Aye, it will wait." She breathed a sigh of relief. "Merry Christmas, Kolyn." "Merry Christmas, Dwight."
"As God is my witness, the man and the wolf are one."
Kolyn wanted to grab the man who sat across the table, to scream it couldn't be. But she didn't. She had known John McNee her whole life, the village smithy being a favorite place for children to gather. He wasn't a man to lie. He believed what he said.
"You have seen this?" she asked, much more calmly than she felt. "Aye, lass. I have. I shall never forget the sight." Drawing in a calming breath, Kolyn smiled, then said, "Please, John, tell me your story."
John pushed back his stool and stood. He stepped closer to the fire and placed another log onto the flames. He leaned against the stone mantel of his one-room cottage and studied the orange blaze. Kolyn remained patient, allowing him to gather his thoughts.
"I was hunting, some four years back it was. I suppose I had traveled a bit farther than I should, somehow wandering onto Blackstone's land. I shot a deer and carried it upon my back for a good distance before I stopped to rest. It was a good-sized buck and I despaired of getting it down the mountain. Quite sudden-like, he was there, standing before me. He is a giant of a man. I feared my life had come to an end."
"Yet he did not kill you, John. Obviously," Kolyn added in the silent interim.
John nodded. "He made no threat. Instead, he lifted the deer upon his back and carried it down to level ground. I was out of breath just keeping pace with him, yet he barely broke a sweat. He never spoke a word. It was dark by then, and he gazed up at the full moon rising above us. I too watched it. When I looked back, the man was gone and in his place stood a black wolf."
Kolyn couldn't believe John. "Perhaps he stepped into the forest as you watched the moon." She recalled the many times he had appeared without any noise to warn her of his presence.
'I would have heard something. Not a leaf or a branch stirred. I took a step forward, to search for the man, but the wolf stopped me, his bared teeth giving me warning to stay. Then he ran into the darkness of the trees."
Now Kolyn was convinced the wolf was friend to Ian. "John, surely, you cannot"
John held up his hand. "I didn't look away but a second, and I am not a man subject to imagining such things. I'm a God-fearing man with a family, and believe me, I've had my own misgivings on what I saw."
"Forgive me, John. I didn't mean . . ." She did not finish.
"I cannot deny what I saw. Ian Blackstone is the Black Wolf. What sort of evil this is, or if it is evil at all, I cannot say. I know only a man to be feared showed me a kindness, yet the same man became a wolf."
John looked back into the flames again. "This man has slain your brothers in combat. Even your father died from the fierceness of his sword and the inhuman strength of his arm. Yet he showed generosity to a stranger trespassing on his land and carried the poached deer upon his own shoulders." Visions teased Kolyn's mind. "A gentle giant." She spoke softly. She looked up at John and stood. "Thank you for telling your story to me, John."
Golden eyes pierced her mind . . .
Kolyn sat up in bed, her sleep disturbed by the dream, the same one she had experienced over and over in the last month. Ian Blackstone's golden eyes haunted her even as she lay awake. She hated him. No, she loved him.
Tears came to her eyes, and she made no effort to stop them. She allowed her sobs to comfort her troubled mind and aching heart. She was lost to this living nightmare. Alone with nowhere to run.
Kolyn stepped into Emmett's room, curious that he had sent for her. He never did that. "What is it you need, Emmett?" "I've something for you," he said, smiling.
Something inside her quivered. She didn't like the look in his eyes, belying the smile on his face. Cautious now, she took his offering.
"Sit," he cooed. She knew something was wrong. "It's a poem, a sort of present for the New Year. I wrote it for you, dear sister. Like I used to." Unable to do anything else, she unrolled the parchment and began to read.
There once was a girl named Lynn . . .
Her gaze met Emmett's. He knew. "Yes," he drawled lazily, enjoying each moment like a child eating candy. "I found out your dirty little secret, Kolyn. I told you, I always do."
Her heart began to pound fiercely within her chest, making it hard to keep her breathing even. She didn't want him to know the effect he had on her. She continued to read the limerick.
Who took a job at the inn.
She caught the lord's eye,
so she plotted and plied,
to revenge family and clan honor.
Kolyn felt herself sway, but willed herself to be still, to stand before his cruel eyes and read.
There once was a girl named Lynn
the lord took to his bed on a whim.
After, the lord wasn't dead,
or so it is said.
She had failed. 'Tis said she regretted.
Kolyn swallowed hard to relieve the dryness of her mouth.
There once was a girl named Lynn,
who ran home to her family in sin.
The lord planted his seed
in her belly indeed.
Emmett poked at her arm, drawing her tear-filled eyes to look at him. "I wonder what the New Year will bring us?" he chirped, then burst out laughing. "Stop it," she cried, wadding the poem up in her hand. "You are such a cruel bastard!" Kolyn threw the ball of parchment at him, striking him in the face harmlessly. He laughed even harder. She ran from the room, all but bowling Dwight over as he entered.
"What's the matter with Kolyn?" Dwight asked, his eyes following her down the hall.
Pretending indifference, Emmett shrugged his shoulders. "I guess she took offense to my poem. Who can figure women out?" He couldn't help but be pleased with himself. And Jacob. The man had always been an invaluable source of information, but his ser
vant had outdone himself this time by discovering where Kolyn had been during her absence. Much of his limerick had been a guess, but now Emmett was certain his hunches were correct. He laughed again. Perhaps even his prediction that she would swell with Blackstone's bastard child would come true. That could prove useful in the future.
Dwight moved to stand beside Emmett's bed, and picked up the parchment she had thrown at him. He read it, and as he did, a dark cloud descended over his face. Emmett watched Dwight as he nearly exploded with fury.
"She betrayed you, Dwight. And me. The bitch spread her legs for the bastard and didn't kill him. She didn't even try." Dwight took Emmett's words as truth, his anger wanting him to believe it.
Emmett went on. "You've more reason than ever to kill that son of a bitch. He's taken what was rightfully yours."
Doubt crept in, making Dwight step back, both mentally and physically. "Kolyn would no' do such a thing."
"Wouldn't she?" "She's a good lass." "Is she?"
Emmett's words were maddening. "She'd not waste her virtue on the Devil. Her faith's too strong." "Ask her, Uncle." Emmett continued to smile, an all-knowing smile that said everything. Dwight shook his head. "'Tis not my place." "You are to be her husband. 'Tis your right to know if she is a virgin or not. 'Tis your right to know if that bastard's seed grows within her belly. Ask her!"
Kolyn waited in her room, expecting Dwight to appear. But when he finally did, she was frightened at the anger on his face. That too was expected, but never had she envisioned what she witnessed at that moment.
"Tell me 'tis a lie." "Tell you what is a lie?" She wouldn't make it easy on him.
His fists clenched at his side, and Kolyn wondered if she should find a weapon. Carefully, she looked about for one, spotting the log just behind her near the fire. "Did you lay with the Black Wolf?"
It was a direct question. She wouldn't lie. Lies, she had learned, could only make a dreadful situation even worse. "Yes." If he had expected more of an explanation, she didn't give it. He waited. She didn't offer more.
"Why?" he finally asked, his voice quivering with emotion. "Why?" she repeated. "Do you not know why?"
He got frustrated, impatient with her. "No, lass. I do not." "If I must explain it to you, Dwight, then you will not understand." He blinked a few times, as if he could not see her properly. "Explain it," he ground out menacingly. "I'll not explain my actions to you, Uncle. Get out." He did not move.
"Believe what you will and get out." Kolyn used her most authoritative voice. Still, he did not move.
He seemed not to know what to do, what to think. But the anger still existed. She was terribly aware of it. He stepped toward her, his look hurt. Suddenly, he struck her full across the face. Kolyn stumbled back, then fell. She scrambled to her feet, grasping the log firmly in her hand. She faced him again, club raised.
Dwight came for her. She raised her weapon higher and yelled, "Do not." He stopped.
Strike me again, Uncle, and I'll kill you." Her voice sounded strange to her ears, almost distant.
Did he believe her? She waited, her breath held till he turned and left. She didn't lower her club until he was out of sight.
Chapter Sixteen
A strange sort of existence had descended on Gregor Castle in the last two months. Kolyn avoided her uncle whenever possible. Dwight remained surly, yet made no mention of their fight again. Now she had no choice but to seek him out, the urgency of an empty cellar pressing her to action. She found Dwight in the great chamber, drinking. When she told him her plan, he just stood and stared at her. Kolyn wondered if he would reply at all.
"Will you see that everyone is ready tonight?" "I have feared that madness had consumed you. Now I'm certain of it." Kolyn refused to let him anger her. "Aye, I am mad, Dwight. See to it." "How do you plan t' raid Blackstone's stores? It will take us into the belly of his castle. 'Tis too risky, Lass."
"His storeroom is full. Ours is empty." Dwight turned away, his anger apparent. "We shall fill it another way."
"No." Kolyn's voice had hardened. "No, we shall fill it tonight. With the supplies of Stonehaven Castle."
He stood like a rock, unmoving.
"Mark my words, Dwight. I'll ride with or without you. 'Tis your choice."
With that, Kolyn left the room. For a brief moment, she wondered if she was indeed mad. What drove her to think she could steal from the Black Wolf and not suffer reprisals? What if he discovered who she really was?
"Kolyn," Dwight called to her. She turned back. "We'll be ready, lass."
Kolyn nodded and walked away. Mad or sane, she would continue on the path she had chosen. It was the only thing she could do now. Kolyn watched the last wagon roll away, its bed heavy with barrels. She quickly went back to the storeroom and motioned for her men to ride out. She waited until the room was empty, then followed.
"What is it you're doin', lass?" She stopped, her path blocked by a burly man a good foot taller and a few feet wider than she You'd best go on," yelled Dwight, bringing the man's attention to his back. "I'll be there shortly." When the man turned to face Dwight, Kolyn grabbed a torch and struck him on the head. He slid to the floor unconscious. "Get the men out of here, Dwight."
He hesitated.
"Now," she said, this time more firmly. He did as she asked. Kolyn looked about one last time, then made her way along the narrow hall and up the steep stairs. She heard the horses riding away as she closed the last doorway behind her. It was a dark, moonless night. It took a second for her eyes to adjust.
"If I were to guess, I'd say I'm in the presence of the MacGregor herself."
Geoffrey's voice was familiar. She didn't need to see his face to know him. She saw no need to deny who she was, and assumed he could not see her face any better than she his. "Your guess is correct," she answered, disguising her voice with a heavy country accent. The dark shadow leaned against the stone wall. "Are you totally without your senses?"
She feigned ignorance. "I don't know what you're meanin'."
"Of course, you do!" He laughed. "'Tis time you learned who you are dealing with, MacGregor." He reached out and grabbed her arm and pushed her in front of him. Kolyn made no move to resist. She walked with him. ''Are you scared, lass?" "No." Kolyn wasn't afraid. "You should be." Geoffrey chuckled.
Kolyn stopped, causing him to bump into her. She didn't turn around. "Should I?"
Geoffrey stood directly behind her, his head high above hers, his body pressed against her own intimately. "Yes, you should," he whispered hoarsely. She sensed his sudden confusion. "Black-stone has taken everything from me. I have nothing more to fear from him."
Something strange forced its way into Geoffrey's mindeven more so, into his heart. Sympathy rarely touched him, and he wasn't used to it. It made him feel odd, uncomfortable. Suddenly, he could smell heather, and he couldn't resist pulling off the plaid that covered her hair. It spilled over her shoulders and down her back. He recalled the only other time he had seen her, covered from head to toe in soot and mud. This time, he wasn't laughing. He could feel the arch of her back, gently curving to form her backside. Somehow, even though he had not, could not now see her face, he no longer thought her an ugly woman.
He reached out and gathered a handful of hair, the softness curling about his fingers, the scent strong in his nostrils. He leaned down to smell, and wished he could tell the color of it in the dark.
Kolyn twisted and brought her knee up, hard and deadly accurate. Geoffrey doubled over with the pain her well-placed knee caused his groin. She couldn't help but smile as she thought her brothers would have been proud that their lessons had not been wasted. She jerked free from his hand, pulling a hank of hair from her head.
Geoffrey dropped to his knees, his moan loud in the silent night. This brought a guard's attention to him. As the guard made his way toward Geoffrey, Kolyn armed herself with a lid from a barrel. His eyes were on Geoffrey, and she attacked, knocking him out with one swift blow to his face. She made he
r way to the castle wall and silently slipped out before a call went up to stop her. Her horse was tied where she left it. She mounted.
"What has taken you so long, Kolyn?" Dwight's voice startled her. Before she could answer they heard horses riding out of Stone-haven. They wasted no more time in leaving. Geoffrey pulled his horse to a halt, the animal fighting to go on. He watched the two riders disappear into the dense woods. He knew who they were and where they were going. There was no need to follow, but something disturbed him. She'd seemed familiar. Why did he feel he knew her from somewhere else?
Whatever the answer, right now he had to face Ian. To tell him what this woman had done under his very nose.
Dwight slid from his mount even before it had come to a halt, turning to Kolyn as she rode into the courtyard behind him. In two long strides, he was beside her horse, pulling her from the saddle. "You've set your mind on killing yourself. I'll not be a part of it."
He hauled her like a child into the great hall, anger pushing him further into his world of pain.
"Put me down, Dwight." Kolyn squirmed in his arms, struggled to free herself from him. He held on tighter. "If you persist in this game, I'll surely go mad."
She stilled. "Put me down." "I'll kill you myself before I'll watch another strike you down."
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