She’d come from a crazy, mixed-up family herself and she had wanted something more for her kids. So she’d made him their guardian early on, before anyone could say she wasn’t in her right mind. No one as young as Kat should lose a battle with breast cancer, Dylan thought. If he could have fought the battle for her, he would have.
Callie had found a toy truck with a horse trailer that included horses. She pushed it to his side and grinned up at him, but something was missing in that smile. She was a smart girl, his Callie. She always seemed to know when he was lost in memories. She got lost, too, sometimes. She had nightmares and sometimes cried and hit for no reason. Dylan’s mom, Angie Cooper, had recommended a psychologist who could help a child process grief.
“Breakfast,” Harmony called from the kitchen. Dylan smiled down at the children. Callie pushed her truck away from him and brought back the television remote.
“Do you want to watch cartoons?”
The four-year-old nodded. Her blond hair matched her brother’s but Katrina had insisted it would stay blond. Dylan kind of doubted it. He channel surfed until Callie nodded her head at a show with ponies. After giving them each a hug, he walked through the dining room to the big country kitchen.
Harmony’s back was to him. Her shoulders were stiff and she was leaning on the counter. He walked up behind her and put a hand on her back. Her shoulders flinched. He rubbed her shoulders until she started to relax.
“Can you take anything for the pain?” he asked.
“Non-narcotic pain reliever. Over the counter, mostly. I drink lots of herbal tea.” She moved away from his touch and turned to look at him. “It just happened, you know.”
She meant her addiction. He waited, knowing she would talk about it when she was ready. Instead she shook her head. “It’s getting better.”
“Yeah, that’s how it is with pain.”
She took a biscuit out of the microwave and handed it to him. It was piled with cheese, bacon and fried eggs. He leaned against the counter and took a bite while she poured them each a cup of coffee.
“Callie and Cash seem to be adjusting.”
He nodded, following her to the dining room. “It hasn’t been easy for them, moving here, where everything’s different and there’s no one they know from their old life.”
“I’m sure it hasn’t been easy for you, either. You left here a single guy on your way to a bull ride and came back, what, a year later a dad to two kids.”
“Something like that. Katrina was a good mom.” He pulled out a chair from the old oak table in the middle of the big room. “The kids don’t—well, Cash doesn’t understand. Callie gets it but she still worries that her mom will come back to the house in Texas and we won’t be there.”
“I’m sorry.” She absently stirred her coffee.
“Yeah, well, life isn’t always easy, is it, Harmony? We were pretty full of ourselves ten years ago.”
She smiled at that. “You were full of yourself.”
“And you were the princess.”
“Life has a way of making us look at things a little differently.” She took a sip of her coffee before continuing. “One day you’re the princess and the next day your best friend is gone, your body is broken, you find yourself hooked on painkillers and...”
He put the biscuit back on the plate and took a long look at the woman sitting next to him. She didn’t look broken. She still looked like a princess. He guessed he still looked like the player he’d been all of his life.
From the outside someone might see two people, whole and enjoying themselves.
If they looked a little closer, they would see the pain in Harmony’s eyes, in her expression. They would see that he was about as exhausted as a man could get. Maybe they were the best allies that ever joined forces.
“If we’re going to do this, we need boundaries.” She stirred her coffee some more.
“Boundaries?”
She looked up. “Dylan, I came here because I was looking for space. Not a relationship.”
“Me, too. That’s why we’re perfect for each other. I know where you stand, you know where I stand. As long as we’re helping each other, we have a good reason to tell the rest of Dawson to leave us be.”
“You really think this is going to stop people from offering to help?”
“It won’t stop them, but it will slow ’em down a little. Especially the matchmakers who think I need a wife.”
She smiled at that. “That bad, huh?”
“Worse than bad. I think they had a list of prospects written up before I came home.” He finished eating the last bite of biscuit and had to admit, she wasn’t a bad cook. “What about you?”
“Me?”
“What are your plans for the future? How long are you staying in Dawson?”
She shrugged, slim shoulders under a pale blue T-shirt. She played with the handle of the coffee cup and didn’t look at him.
“I don’t know. I thought if I came here, I’d find the person I used to be, before life got crazy. I need time and space to put my life back together. And then maybe I’ll go back and finish college. I always thought I’d be a teacher.”
“Not a singer?”
She shook her head and smiled up at him. “I’m not the musician in the family. I leave that up to Clay and Lila.” Her older brother and little sister. He knew that both had somewhat decent careers.
“You’re good. I heard you playing.”
“I’m okay, but not good. I play for myself. I hadn’t played in years but since I had the accident I’ve picked it back up.”
A screech from the living room ended the conversation, reminding him that with Cash and Callie in his life, he had no room for relationships. All of his energy went to raising the two kids in the living room.
He headed that way with Harmony following. What he found in the living room were two kids wrestling over one toy. He scooped them up in his arms and gave Harmony an apologetic smile.
“I think it’s time for me to get these two home for a nap. And maybe I’ll see you at church tomorrow.”
“I’m not sure,” she responded as she gathered up the diaper bag and followed him to the door.
He had a feeling that “not sure” meant no way would he see her in church.
Chapter Four
Harmony hadn’t planned on attending church; it just happened. At some point during the long, sleepless night while pacing the living-room floor, she’d decided to give faith a second chance. She’d stood at the window watching the sky turn from inky darkness to gray to palest pink on the eastern horizon, and realized she’d been empty inside for a long time.
In the stillness of early morning she’d leaned her forehead against the cool glass of the window and thought about being fourteen again. Fourteen and knowing what she wanted out of life. Chasing calves as she helped her dad with immunizations, dozing in the green grass of the field as bees buzzed and a horse grazed nearby, her brother somewhere close playing the guitar and singing an Elvis song.
She’d known herself then. Her faith had taken her to Cooper Creek with several other members of Dawson Community Church for a late summer baptizing service.
As she’d packed her bags to come to Dawson, she had said she needed a place to be alone, without family and friends invading every quiet inch of her life. It hadn’t been the complete truth. She’d come to Dawson to find joy in life again. Dawson was the place where she remembered being happiest.
She’d been hoping that coming here would help her bring the pieces of her life back together. And one of the missing pieces was the faith she’d walked away from.
Several hours after that revelation, she stood in the parking lot of the church looking up at the white building with the steeple reaching to the sky wondering what she’d been thinking. How had
this been a good idea? It wasn’t that easy, to fix a life. Church wasn’t the bandage she could put on the last seven or eight years of mistakes and expect them to be instantly fixed.
A car door slammed, startling her. She leaned heavily on the cane that she hadn’t been able to leave behind today. The pain started at the top of her spine and radiated down to her ankles. The pain of having been put back together with pins and rods.
The other late arrival was Dylan Cooper. She watched as he settled Callie on the ground and then lifted Cash from the truck. He turned to smile at her and she was struck by how his appearance calmed her nerves. His smile made her feel a little less alone. Because they were united in watching each other’s backs, she decided. There was nothing more to it.
“You should keep moving unless you want to start rumors.” He shifted Cash to his left hip and reached for Callie’s hand. “If you’re okay with that, I’m your man.”
She smiled at the little girl holding tight to his right hand, then lifted her gaze to Dylan’s. She didn’t know what to say. She looked back at the church and then to Dylan. He winked, as if he understood.
“It’s easier to walk in with someone than to walk in alone the first time back.”
“I can’t imagine you ever being anywhere but here, in this church. I can’t imagine you ever having a crisis of faith.”
“Harmony, everyone has those moments. Just because I’m a Cooper doesn’t mean I bought into faith without doubts, without questions. That’s one thing my parents instilled in us, though. They taught us to make our faith our own. Sometimes that means questioning.”
The church bells rang. Harmony reached for Callie’s free hand. Dylan was right; it was easier walking through the doors with him and the two children. It was easier being a part of a group instead of being alone. But as they moved toward the front of the church, she tried to let go of Callie’s hand, to break the connection. Sitting with Dylan would be taking the charade too far. She spotted an empty space in a pew near the back, the perfect place for her. Callie held tight.
“I should sit down.” Harmony eased away from Dylan and his family of three.
“Why would you do that?” Dylan let the squirming Cash down and the little boy took off as soon as his feet hit the ground. His goal was clear, he was heading for Jackson Cooper, Dylan’s older brother. After hugging Jackson’s wife, Maddie, and his daughter, Jade, Cash climbed the pew and landed in Angie Cooper’s lap. Dylan’s mom held the little boy tight, whispering in his ear and smiling as she glanced back to find Dylan.
“Sit with us.” Dylan reached for her arm. “I promise, it won’t hurt.”
She thought it might. But with Dylan holding one arm and Callie holding tight to her hand, Harmony didn’t see that she had a choice. Dylan was a strong force, like getting caught in fast-moving water. He led her to the open space next to his parents and waited as she took a seat next to his mother. Somehow Callie ended up on her lap and Dylan sat next to her.
As the music started she glanced at the man sitting next to her. The man who had once been a boy who teased her. He’d also been a friend. If she thought back far enough, they had tormented each other plenty, but they’d also laughed a lot.
Dylan was no longer a boy. He’d grown into his gangly, teenage good looks. His features were strong but lean and handsome. His skin was tanned a golden brown and his dark hair, a little on the long side, curled at his collar. With strong hands he held a child in the easiest way, but he also knew how to hold a woman in a way that she felt his strength.
Dylan Cooper was dangerous. Sitting next to him as she tried to put her life back together was dangerous.
So why in the world had she agreed to his plan? As the music continued, her mind shifted to other thoughts, ones about being lost and then found. Thoughts about being on a solid rock. Unwavering. Strong.
Strong enough to fight temptation that sometimes took her by surprise. Strong enough to fight the pain that woke her late in the night. Physical and emotional pain. Because sometimes in the dark of night she remembered Amy’s face after the accident. She remembered reaching for her best friend and not finding a pulse.
She closed her eyes, needing that everlasting faith that would get her through the coming days, weeks, months or even years. Whatever it took to get past these difficult times.
A hand reached for hers. Not Dylan’s hand, Angie’s. Harmony smiled up at the woman she’d known for so many years, a woman who walked with faith. Angie squeezed her hand and then patted it. No words were spoken but the gesture, the look in her eyes, said everything Harmony needed to hear.
It would get easier. Harmony wondered how many times Angie had given Dylan that same talk, the same look. Give it time, the look said. Angie Cooper understood.
The sermon ended. Toward the end she’d faded, not hearing all of the words. As had happened often in her life, her mind had focused on the words of the songs, small sermons in their own right. The words of a song could take a person to another place, reaching the innermost places of their being. She needed to know that every step she took would lead her somewhere. To a place where she would be stronger, a place where her doubts wouldn’t continue to hold her hostage. She wanted to be free from this place where guilt held her chained to the recent past.
Around her people were standing, saying goodbye, discussing the price of grain and what cattle were going for this week at the stockyard. Callie had long since left Harmony’s lap and had headed for Blake Cooper and his wife, Jana. Harmony remembered Jana from years ago, and the year she’d left Blake.
Their daughter, Lindsey, lifted Callie and turned to say something to Jackson’s daughter, Jade. Behind the girls stood Reese Cooper, now married with a son and a baby on the way. He had lost his vision but Harmony could see that he was surviving. He had a good life with Cheyenne.
Harmony knew she needed to stand. To walk away. To go home and find a quiet place. Then a hand reached out. She looked at the man who offered it. He knew. He knew that her body ached and that standing would be so embarrassing because she was twenty-six and her body didn’t work the way she wanted it to. But with her hand clasped in his, she came to her feet and no one watched, there were no whispers about her situation. He made it easy.
“Harmony, you’ll come to the house for lunch,” Angie Cooper said in a way that it didn’t sound like an invitation but a given.
“I should go home, I...” She didn’t have a good excuse. Angie knew that. Her only excuse was a selfish one. She wanted to be alone to cry. She wanted to curl up in a ball and wait for the pain to pass.
Callie came out of nowhere, a fireball of energy and happiness. Harmony smiled down at the little girl and another type of guilt hit. What she’d gone through paled in comparison to what Callie had suffered.
“Are you going to come and see the pony Jackson gave me?” Callie reached for Harmony’s free hand. “He was Lindsey’s pony but she’s big now.”
“I’m not sure. I should probably go home.” She smiled down at Callie’s upturned face, her blue eyes bright, her blond hair in a ponytail. “I have to check on my horse.”
“Can I come with you?” Callie still had hold of her hand but it felt a lot like she was holding Harmony’s heart. A person didn’t walk away from a connection like that.
* * *
Dylan pulled away from a conversation with an old friend from school and moved back to Harmony’s side. Callie held her hand and his mom was saying something to her. Harmony looked like a cornered barn cat, the kind that loved a bowl of milk but didn’t really want to be held.
“Harmony doesn’t want lunch.” Callie looked up at him.
He knew Harmony was worn-out. He could see the white-knuckled grip on the cane. He knew she was looking for a way out. “I bet we can talk her into coming with us.”
“I really need to check on Beau.”
Dylan’s dad, Tim Cooper, joined them and was looking from person to person, trying to catch up. “Harmony bought Terry’s horse. From Bill Tanner,” Dylan explained, filling his dad in.
“How’s Doris? You went with Bill to the hospital, didn’t you?” Jackson asked, getting in the middle of things. He had that grin on his face that meant he was up to something. Dylan couldn’t say he had missed this kind of brotherly love.
“Yeah, I went with him.” What of it? That’s what he really wanted to say.
His mom gave him a curious look. “Where were the kids?”
Dylan looked at Harmony and tried to remember that they had wanted people to connect them. But it was a lot more complicated than he’d imagined. It felt like being tangled up in her life, which was the last thing he needed. He had two kids depending on him. His life now was about being their dad, or the best replica of one he could be.
Harmony needed space. He needed space.
His mom cleared her throat, reminding him he hadn’t answered her question about the kids. He understood the look on her face. He was twenty-seven and everyone was waiting for him to make a mistake. He hadn’t left them at the store, given them food they were allergic to or forgotten to feed them. He read to them, kept them clean and somehow managed to cook halfway decent food.
“They were with me,” Harmony answered, sounding stronger than she had moments earlier. She smiled at him, then at his mom. “We were at the Mad Cow eating dinner and on my way home I saw the lights at the Tanners, so I pulled in. Dylan showed up a little after I got there.”
Dylan’s mom looked from Harmony to him, to Callie, and she smiled. “Well, I guess everything was taken care of, then.”
“Yes, it was. And now, we should be going.” Dylan wanted it to be that easy but it wasn’t. He reached for Harmony’s hand and felt the tremble as their fingers joined. “Hey, Jackson, would it be a problem for Maddie to drive Harmony’s car on out to the ranch? I’ll take her with me to check on the horse.”
Love Inspired June 2014 - Bundle 2 of 2: Single Dad CowboyThe Bachelor Meets His MatchUnexpected Reunion Page 5