This Darkest Man
Page 17
I shook my head at our reflections. “No. I won’t wear this thing. You’re treating me like an animal.”
“You already are wearing it,” Daniel pointed out. “And you may feel like an animal, but you actually look sexy as hell right now.” He placed both hands on my shoulders and kissed my neck after he swept my hair aside. His hands crept down to squeeze my breasts, even rolling my nipples through the lace. I felt myself moisten immediately as he continued to kiss my neck. He pushed his hands into the delicate cups of the bra and pinched my nipples harder, to which I let out a moan.
“Take it off and fuck me, please?” I breathed, my own hand going down to the frustrating and confining metal that obstructed any relief.
“I love it when you beg, I really do,” he murmured into my skin, before sucking on my neck and marking me. I wanted him to bite me harder, anything to get my mind off the unbearable need to have him buried deep inside me.
“Then forget about Josh, and just keep me here with you,” I panted as his finger pinched at my nipple again and sent something electric straight to where I was untouchable between my legs.
He laughed softly. ”Keep you? Keep you here, bound and waiting for my use only. That’s tempting, Mattie. It really is.” He turned me to face him, and started to kiss me in such a way that tormented me even more. If the chastity device wasn’t removed soon, I was going to scream.
“Please,” I begged, between kisses. “I need you to touch me down there. I need you now.” I went to kiss him again, but a hand tangled in my hair and held me back, pulling up my head so I was forced to look him directly in the eye.
I couldn’t read the look on his face. It partly scared me and partly thrilled me, and the overall effect was to fuel my lust.
“Congratulations, Mattie. I’ve changed my mind,” he said softly.
“You mean you’ll leave Josh alone?” Hopefully we could forget about him and then he could just take me to bed.
He gave me a small smile before shaking his head. “No, not at all, but I will leave you out of it. Margaret will turn up at the motel room as planned and she’ll take it from there. I have other plans for you now.”
“Like what?” I breathed.
By the grip on my hair, he pulled me closer so he could whisper in my ear. “I’m going to keep you for good. Enslaved, and your pleasure subject to my whims. If you’re a good girl, you might get to cum, but if you’re bad, you’ll be punished.” His lips moved to my neck as I internally went over his words, that swirled around in my head and for a moment I thought that I would faint. Then I felt his teeth lightly bite at my neck and it made me jump. He laughed. “I’m going to have so much fun with you.”
He released my hair and I pushed away from him. “That doesn’t sound very…fair. I don’t want to be your slave. I want to be your girlfriend!” Those words rushed out of me with violence. “I want you to love me,” I said weakly, my tone almost begging.
He closed his eyes for a moment as if his head hurt, then he opened them, shaking his head. “Matilda…if I were to love you, then that would mean that I forgave you, and I don’t. I can’t. This is the best that I can do.”
I took another step back. “So if I want to be in your life I basically have to be your sex slave? I have to be humiliated just for the opportunity to be with you?” My voice was cracking and I wrapped my arms around myself, staring down at the floor. I was aware of his eyes firmly on me and I couldn’t stand to look him in the eye.
“Yes.” There may have been something more in his voice, it may have been regret or sympathy, but none of that meant anything because the overwhelming, pathetic pang of needing to be with him seemed to rule everything about me. I hated myself, and I hated him even more.
It took everything in me to lift my eyes to his face as shame swept over me. “Okay,” I croaked out.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Even though I was naked, there was no chill on my skin. The air was warm, and the servants must have gone to great lengths to keep Daniel’s draughty country house heated. The leather collar that I wore though, that felt cold on my skin even though where it chafed should have been hot. I stood still, Margaret’s hand on the leash forbidding me from moving, and the crop that she ran up and down my body served as sufficient warning not to be disobedient.
She was itching to strike me with it. My eyes were on the photos spread out on the table in front of me. All in color, Josh was down on his knees, naked but for the collar and his bottom red from Margaret’s crop. It turned out that Josh was a masochist, which was news to me. The photo’s had been circulated to humiliate him, but that was just the start. Over the last three months, Daniel had guided Josh’s company to complete destruction. Everyone who had invested had lost everything and Josh’s name was mud in the city. He had filed for bankruptcy today, that’s why Daniel was celebrating.
He walked into the dining room, with a broad grin upon his face and a servant followed him with a bottle of champagne.
“Get down on your knees,” Margaret ordered me. She never disguised her glee when she got to humiliate me. She took sick delight in it and I had learned to give as little reaction as possible. I sunk down to sit at Daniel’s feet, obedient as always. He always kept me close, I travelled to the city with him during the week, where I stayed naked in the penthouse while he was in, and dressed up and pretty on his arm when we were out. He was affectionate in public, and the world thought that I was in girlfriend. I heard whispers of how lucky I was to be with Daniel, little did they know the truth.
In the country house, Margaret was used to keep me in my place. If the week in the city and Daniel’s affection and attention gave me hope that Daniel might forgive me and that he really did love me as I secretly believed, the weekends in the country destroyed all those hopes. I was at the mercy of Margaret, and evenings were often spent with others, where I was, as before, humiliated. Daniel’s fucked up rules were that no one else was allowed to fuck me, and I wasn’t allowed to have anyone else’s cock in my mouth except for his. Other men were allowed to make me cum, he seemed to enjoy that. And truthfully, I enjoyed it as well, as much as I shouldn’t. Colt was my favorite; he always made me laugh before he made me cum and I looked forward to evenings where I got to be with him. Part of me wanted Daniel to be jealous, but it seemed to turn him on instead.
My other favorite was Fantasia. I didn’t know what her real name was, but she was a beautiful red head and the name, Fantasia, suited her. The first time Daniel had introduced her, I had immediately frozen. I had never done anything with a girl before and the thought sent shivers through me. But she had noticed my tension and whispered in my ear, “I’m a friend of Colt’s, it will be okay.” After that she had kissed me so sensually, it was like no one else was watching and I soon began to look forward to seeing her. She was supposed to be coming tonight; it would be only the three of us, with Margaret skulking around in case Daniel required her.
Daniel stroked my hair as a glass of champagne was passed to him, twirling strands of it around his fingers and occasionally pulling it so that I really did feel like a toy. “Drink?”
He bent down and placed the glass to my lips, I drank, enjoying the taste, more than his touch right then anyway. I stayed silent at his feet, even as he tried to coax me into conversation. I remained obedient, but only answered with one word answers. Finally, he grew tired of that, and pulled me up to sit up on his lap.
“Why are you so quiet?”
I tried to look away, but he gripped my chin and forced me to look at him. “Why are you so happy?” I forced out. “A lot of people have lost money because of you.”
“Because of Josh,” he shot back.
“Because of you.” Our eyes met, but I didn’t flinch at the anger that I saw in his, because I had exactly the same feelings boiling through me. We held each other’s gaze, only breaking it when Margaret returned with Fantasia. She looked pretty as always, her rich red hair coiled into waves reminiscent of the 1940s. Her volu
ptuous figure was clad in a skin tight dress made of a shiny fabric that suited her look. Daniel instantly pushed me from his lap at the sight of her, and I sunk down to my knees once more.
He stood and went to greet her, only this time he kissed her on her full, red mouth. If she was surprised, she didn’t show it, smiling when the kiss was broken and switching her gaze to me. “Matilda,” she said as she bent down to kiss my cheek. “I’ve missed your hot little body.”
I smiled back at her. “I’ve missed your delicious tongue.” I wasn’t normally this forward, but the anger within me made me want to flirt with her. I felt like I had to prove something to Daniel, but I wasn’t sure what it was.
Fantasia grinned, and pulled me to my feet as she placed that tongue in my willing mouth. I found myself encircling my arms around her and reaching for the zipper of her dress, pulling it down slowly to expose her. She stepped back from me, and shrugged it from her body so she stood wearing a corset that contained her heavy breasts and wide hips. She wore no panties with it however, and whereas before I had blushed and looked away from her shaven pussy, now I freely looked.
She kept grinning knowingly at me, and guided me over to the formal dining room table, her mouth on mine, backing me up until my bare behind met the wood as she helped me up to sit on it. Our hands were all over each other, and once again, I was turned on by the thought of Daniel watching us. As usual, Fantasia lowered her head so she was between my legs and began to tentatively lick me like I was something sweet that she wanted to savor. I lay my head back and enjoyed it, clearing everything else out of my mind.
But then the sound of Daniel’s cell phone ringing interrupted us.
“Shit,” he swore as he looked at his phone. “I’ve got to take this.”
After he strode from the room, Fantasia looked at me and giggled. “Terrible timing, I had you so close,” she said smugly.
“So keep going then,” I told her, leaning on my elbows with my legs still spread.
“I can’t.” She climbed up on the table next to me.
“Says who?” I reached out to stroke her breasts through the lace of the corset.
“Says him. Has Colt never told you the rules? There’s no fucking you for the boys, and none of us are allowed to have you go down on us. You’re like some kind of precious jewel for Mr. Hellman. We’re allowed to make you cum in his presence only, but we’re not allowed to use your body for our own pleasure,. It’s just not fair,” she said with a smile as my hand rubbed over her hard nipples. “That in particular isn’t fair,’ she whispered. “You’re getting me all horny.”
I smiled at her and stopped touching her. “Lie down on your back.”
She looked suspiciously at me. “I don’t think that would be a good idea.”
I put my hands on her shoulders and gently pushed her down to the position that I was in prior. “I think that it’s a wonderful idea.” She didn’t resist, allowing me to lay her flat on her back before I slid off the table. I gently started to stroke her already moist pussy. I had never touched any woman like this before, or even seen another woman’s area like this so up close. For a moment I thought of her as my toy, my experiment, and I understood Daniel’s desires a little more.
Slowly I lowered my face down, and lifted one of her legs over my shoulder before running my tongue over her. She shivered. “That’s so good, Mattie,” she said, so softly that it was hard to hear her. Encouraged, I began to lap at her with more enthusiasm and she began tremble underneath me. Power swept through me at the thought of bringing this beautiful creature under my control just by making her cum. I savored all of her; the taste, the feel, so very different to a man.
“What the hell are you doing?”
I froze before slowly letting Fantasia’s leg down and backing away from her. She sat up on the table, her eyes warily on Daniel. I wouldn’t have turned to look at him, but he made me, gripping my chin and forcing my eyes to meet his. “I didn’t say that you could do that,” he said tightly.
I shrugged. “So?”
He stared at me for a moment, then released me as his face relaxed into a smile. Only it wasn’t a nice smile, it was nasty. “I guess it’s only fair that if you get a turn with Fantasia, then so do I.” His hands went to his fly, freeing himself. I turned away, I didn’t want to see this, but he gripped my arm. “Sit,” he ordered as he pushed me down onto a chair. I swallowed as he approached her, her eyes scanned him up and down and there was no doubt that she was just as into men as she was women. No objection was uttered from her as he swiftly entered her. She wrapped her legs around him, pulling him in deep. I wanted to pull my eyes away, but couldn’t. A sick jealousy ran through me at the thought of him screwing another woman. I wanted him jealous, and it had backfired on me.
When Fantasia began to moan with pleasure, I managed to move, getting to my feet and stalking from the room. Margaret began to question me as I passed her on the stairs, but I gave her a harsh shove that had her reaching for the balustrades to save herself. At that moment, if she had fallen to her death, I wouldn’t have cared.
I went to Daniel’s room, where we normally spent our time together, but my motive for going there was the liquor cabinet. I threw open the glass doors that housed his collection of aged scotch and bourbon. They banged, and for a moment I thought that they might shatter. But they didn’t, and I reached for a glass, filling it with bourbon before falling back into a leather armchair to sip at it. Tension and jealousy tightened every muscle in my body, and while at first I took tentative sips of the straight bourbon, I ended up throwing it down my throat in an effort to dull those feelings that ran rampant through me.
I sensed him before he even entered the room, and clutched the glass tighter. He walked across the soft carpet and poured himself a drink, before standing in front of me. He was shirtless, and I imagined Fantasia running her hands across his chest and enjoying the feel of his hard muscle under her fingers. The thought made the bourbon taste even more bitter.
He lifted his glass to me as if saluting me before throwing its contents down his throat. I scowled at him and he raised an eyebrow at me before grinning and pouring himself another drink.
“Angry?” he mocked. “Jealous?”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “Don’t flatter yourself. I’m just pissed because you got in my way.”
He held my gaze. “Liar.”
I drained my glass and placed it on the small glass table beside me. It hit with a bang that seemed to resonate around the room. “Why is it only you that gets to make the rules?”
His grin slipped slightly. “You know why. I’ve explained the conditions of our being together. There’s no equality here.”
I leaned back in the chair, resting my head against the leather. “Why is it that anyone can touch me or make me climax, and I’m not allowed my mouth on anyone?”
His grin faded entirely. “I don’t need to explain myself to you of all people, Matilda,” he said sternly.
I laughed softly. “You’re right. You don’t need to explain to me because I already know. You want me. It’s simple. You may let other’s give me pleasure but I’m never allowed to reciprocate because you can’t stand the thought of my mouth on someone who isn’t you.” He kept his eyes on me but said nothing, even as I got to my feet. “You want me, but your twisted set of morals means that you can’t admit it or act on it.” I tilted my head to observe him, but he was giving nothing away beneath that cool gaze. “I think that you might even love me, deep down, and by keeping me in this sick relationship of ours, you get the best of both worlds. You retain your loyalty to Jeremy, and on some level, you get to keep me as well.”
I stood in front of him, naked and collared, his for the taking, but his eyes didn’t flick over my body in admiration or otherwise, they remained on my face. “What’s the point of your little speech?” he asked, his tone harsh, but I wasn’t bothered.
“Why do I fall I love with bad men?” I mused, more to myself than him.
My heart pounded but I managed to control my breathing. “I don’t believe you. You’re lying.”
He shrugged. “It doesn’t matter if you believe me or not. This little game is over. I’ve achieved everything that I wanted and now I’m bored with you. Your time here is finished. You have one hour to pack your things and then my driver will take you wherever you want to go.”
I held his gaze. “I still think you’re lying,” I said softly.
He didn’t blink, just nodded with his head toward the door. “Like I said, it doesn’t matter what you think. Now, off you go,” he said dismissively.
I raised my chin, I would not let him see me defeated, and turned toward the door. My feet were silent on the carpet as I walked through it. I let myself glance once more in his direction, he was watching me, and I gave him a slight nod as I left.
Perhaps I should have felt free, but instead I just felt numb. No doubt the disappointment and heartache would come later, but at right that moment, nothing seemed real. Not the time spent with Daniel, not the things that I had done…it all seemed like a bizarre dream rather than a reality. It was easier to think of it that way.
In my room, I threw aside the dog collar and let it drop to the floor before I began to pack. Margaret came in to assist me but I abruptly ordered her away. She gave me a sour look but left silently. I smiled as she closed the door quietly behind her. This would be the new me. No longer would I be cowed by others or ordered around. Everything I did would be driven by assertiveness, after all, I only had myself to rely on. And especially, I silently vowed, I would never let a man control me again.