I throw the shot down and welcome the burn again. While Tito is my main man all week long, Jack is my go-to guy at these parties. I grab a real glass from one of the cabinets, some ice from the bucket next to the punch bowl, and give myself a generous pour of Jack Daniels on the rocks. I can shoot whiskey, but there is something that makes me feel refined about sipping it over ice.
“Okay, Tori, what do you want?” I ask and lean casually against the counter, as far away from Tori as I can get.
“Isn’t it fucking obvious? I you want, Rhodes, and I made a mistake. I didn’t realize that what we had was more than a fucking fling. Blaire has been up my ass about what I did and-“ I cut her off.
“It’s too late. I’ll never get past what you did, plus, I don’t want to. I’m over it.”
“Don’t say that. We were so good together.”
“Getting each other off doesn’t mean we’re good together,” I respond and throw back my Jack. Fuck the sipping. My brain is starting to buzz from all the whiskey. Soon, it will turn off completely and I will slip into the blissful numbness that has become my life.
“That’s harsh,” she says with a small sniffle. Fuck, if she cries I will cave. I’m soft by nature, but when chick’s cry. Fuck my life. I can’t help but feel guilty. “You were the best I’ve had, Rhodes. I want you. All of you. Dick, heart, everything.”
“My heart isn’t available,” I drop the bomb while refilling my cup. I’m way past tipsy so I know I need to end this conversation before I say something I don’t anyone to hear. “It’s done, Tori. Move on. I have.”
It’s not a lie. I’ve moved on from her. But, I’ve never moved on from the one girl who engraved herself into my heart.
With that depressing realization gnawing at me, I refill my glass and toss back my Jack, grabbing a beer from fridge because I need to slow down on the hot sauce, and walk away. Leaving Tori speechless in the kitchen.
Several hours later, I’m splendidly fucked up. Tori must have left because I haven’t seen her sulking around here lately. I’m riding the high of my last collegiate shenanigans now that the liquor has subdued my brain. We graduate tomorrow and then I’m off to Minnesota.
“Rhodes, you pumped for the big move” Johnny Logan asks. He’s another baseball player who we’ve been close to over the years.
“Yeah, bro, I’m so ready. My agent found me a house in the west suderbs, sbuderbs,” I slur.
“Suburbs?” Logan asks with a smirk. He can see I’m toasted right now.
“Yes,” I agree and point at him so he’s knows I know he’s right. “Suburbs of the Twin Cities. Nice area. On a fucking lake because everything is in Minnesota.” Minneapolis and St. Paul is what Minnesotans refer to as the Twin Cities because they’re side by side apparently and they’re surrounded by several nice suburbs. I’ll learn their Midwest lingo eventually. You betcha.
“I love the gold mohawk,” he offers and nods toward my head. I always dyed my mohawk the opposing team’s jersey color. But now, it is gold for graduation. The Golden Knights colors are black and gold and I wanted to pay homage to my team one last time.
“Thanks, one last time because I doubt the Vikings will let me dye it next season.”
As I’m standing there, in the living room, talking with Finn, Logan, Stoner, Sims, and a few other athletes, seriously sexy blonde girls stroll into my line of sight. They remind me of Stanzy and Staley and my heart stutters in my chest.
Maybe this is just the chick I need to get Stanzy out of my system.
Suddenly, I’m feeling quite sober. I shake my head as if it will help clear he alcohol out. I need to make this happen. My drunk ass thinks this plan of sleeping with Stanzy’s clone is a fabulous idea.
“What is that?” I interrupt Stoner mid-sentence.
“What or who?” he laughs.
“Both.”
“They’re twins. They’re just visiting one of the sorority chicks here,” Finn says. He is the campus king of gossip. If you need to know anything about anyone, he’s your guy. “They’ve been here before. They go to college in the Midwest somewhere I think, Nebraska maybe. I forgot, but they visit once in a while. This is the first time they’ve been to the PiKap house. Last year, I met them at the Tri-Delta Halloween party before we came over here.”
“Where’ve you been, bro?” Sims quips. “Everyone knows when these chicks come to campus.”
“Yeah, well I’ve been playing football and making sure Blake didn’t kill anyone in the last nine months,” I quip and shoot Finn a glare.
“Touché,” Finn nods to me and takes a swig of his beer. Finn and Blake made a bet over Maisy last fall and that went over about as well as you can expect. Blake lost his shit, so I had to find mine and make sure he survived our senior year. I broke up more fights that that jackass started than I can even count. I’ll admit, it was a nice distraction.
“Yeah, that was partially your fault, so you should hook me up,” I motion toward the gorgeousness to our right.
“Fine,” Finn concedes. He knows his shot of hooking up with either or both of them is over if he brings me into the picture. “But, so you know, the taller one is the easier one. Logan bagged her during one of their visits last semester. The shorter one is hotter, has a smart mouth and is tougher to crack.”
“And she has an ass on her. Wow!” I’ve only seen one other ass that perfect in all my life, but that girl would never come to a party where she knew I would be. Perfectly round, plump and grabable.
We approach the twins as they are talking with a few girls I recognize, Mary Lou Albright being one of them. Mary Lou doesn’t come to these parties, what the hell is she doing here tonight? Maybe if I were actually sober I would have started connecting the dots.
“Ladies,” Finn begins.
“Hey Finn!” Mary Lou replies, but her face pales when she sees me coming up behind him. The twins have yet to turn around and face us. “H-How’s it going?” she stutters. Mary Lou’s never tongue-tied.
“Good, just wanted to make our way over and say hi.” He motions toward me.
“Jessup Rhodes?” one of the other girls standing next to Mary Lou asks.
“The one and only,” I smile. I wish the twins would face me.
“I’m Sara,” she replies and her cheeks flush. I know I’m a big deal on this campus and this is a typical reaction for me and my boys.
As Sara is falling all over herself and stumbling with her words, Mary Lou twirls her finger in the air and the twins turn around to face me.
I’m hit with an exquisite set of hazel colored eyes that are a combination of green, brown, and gold and I’m lost immediately. I’m a sucker for beautiful eyes and there is only person who has eyes this unique.
“Stanzy?” My heart stops.
“Hey, Jess. I didn’t know you’d be here.” Her voice cuts through the crowd, through the music, and straight through my chest. Where the fuck else would I be? She shoots Mary Lou an angry glare.
“Stanzy,” I let it roll off my tongue again. It’s like I haven’t said her name in years and I forgot what it sounds like coming out of my mouth.
I let my eyes roam over her body for a second. She is in a pair of short cut-off jean shorts that accentuate her strong legs and curvy hips. A lavender lacey tank top hugs her perfect tits and is just short enough to reveal a hint of her toned abs. But besides the perfect ten body, her face is beautiful. Instagram doesn’t do her justice. Whoa. She is still breath taking. Maybe even more so now as she’s matured. Emotions are crashing into my like a tsunami and I’m frozen in place, and of all things, my cock hardens at the sight of her.
“So,” she pauses and rocks back onto her heels.
“Yeah, sorry,” my brain reconnects and I speak. “Where else would I be? I go here, remember?”
“Oh, yeah I know that. Just thought the football team had a banquet or something tonight.”
Awkward.
“Um, well, we were supposed to have a senior dinner at Coac
h’s house, but his wife got sick, so we had to reschedule to after graduation. We come to most parties unless we’re on the road for a game or something, so it worked out for us to be here tonight. We wouldn’t miss the last party of the year otherwise.”
“That makes sense. We’ve spent most of our time here with the Tri-Delts at Lou’s.”
“So, you’ve visited here a lot over the last four years?” I ask in a clipped tone. Has she really visited my school and never looked me up?
“Yeah, a few times. We try to make it out here once a semester and Lou comes to Minnesota a couple times of year too,” she says sheepishly.
“And you’ve never told me you were here?”
“Do you guys know each other?” Finn interrupts, eyes bouncing between me and Stanzy.
“Yeah, Finn. We fucking do. Imagine my surprise to find out my ex-girlfriend has visited several times and never told me.”
“Ouch, bro,” Logan offers with a pat on the back. I shove him off because I’m seething with new information.
“Nice rock. Didn’t peg you for the pretentious type.” I motion toward her left hand where the massive solitary diamond sits next to my infinity ring.
I turn promptly and stalk away. And here I thought Tori was going to be the worst part of the night.
Back in the kitchen I lie up more shots.
“So what’s the deal, bro?” Blake asks. He must have seen my encounter with Stanzy. “Who was that chick?”
“My ex.”
“You have an ex?”
Yeah, clearly I don’t share much.
I nod.
"I’m not super good at this shit, but I figured it out with Maisy. Maybe I can help. Besides, you saved my ass. Let me return the favor.”
I pour and drink another shot of Jack. I’m going to puke tonight, but whatever. I don’t give a shit right now.
Nodding at Blake I begin to speak.
“Remember when you were tore up and you asked me for advice about Maisy?”
Blake nods.
“I told you that I was a better person before I came to Cambria.”
“I remember. You said you’re salty ass mood wasn’t because of Tori.”
“It wasn’t. There’s always been a girl and right before the draft she got engaged to a complete tool.”
Blake raises an eyebrow and stares at me. “That girl?” he asks and nods toward the living room where Stanzy is still standing with the baseball boys, Staley, Mary Lou and some other sorority girls.
I nod. “Yup, she was my best friend growing up, she saved me from my shitty home life, and then we became more our senior year of high school.”
“And she dumped you when she left for college?”
“Nope, I dumped her…” I pause. “via text.”
“What the fuck, bro?” He shakes his head disapprovingly at me.
“Yeah, her fiancé,” I practically choke on the word, “posted her engagement pictures to Insta just before the draft. The shitty thing is I did this to myself. Ya know? I felt like I needed to make something of myself before I could be with her. And now that I’m finally there, it’s too late. I don’t know how I feel. It’s weird seeing her here after all these years, but at the same time it feels like we’ve never been apart. It’s fucking stupid.”
“It’s not fucking stupid. And why don’t you think you’re enough?”
“Because my whole life I was told I’m nothing. Except by her. She made me feel like I was her whole world.”
“Who the fuck would say that to you?” Blake asks, genuine anger creeping over his face.
“My dad, or the guy I thought was my dad.”
Blake pours us both another shot. This shit is getting deep for a frat party. There are ears everywhere, listening to my current meltdown.
“He made you feel inferior?”
I nod.
“That’s bullshit. You’re the best dude I know.”
“It’s messed up, man. My dad cheated on my mom, he got a lady pregnant. So then my mama cheated on him and I was a revenge baby. My brother, Rollie, who now that I think about isn’t even my brother at all, were raised by his dad and my mom. It’s fucking fucked up. I found out the day I left for Cambria that he wasn’t my real dad. It’s just messed with me, you know?”
“Jesus, and I thought being ignored my whole life was bad.”
“I don’t want to get into it. It’s fucking depressing, it’s our last night here and now she’s here. I just can’t it, man.”
“Yeah, is this what’s been fucking grinding on you for four years? Her?”
I nod. “She was my Maisy, man. She was it for me.”
“What’s her name?” he asks and slides me another shot.
“Stanzy.”
“Cool name.”
“She was a cool chick.”
We cheers and toss the shot back. I need to stop, I’m already so fucked up that I’m spilling my initimate secrets in a crowded frat house. And I sure as shit don’t want Stanzy to see what I’ve become. That I’ve become Rowen.
I look around to make sure no one was listening to my conversation with Blake when his eyes widen and he shoots me a look.
I turn around to see who’s behind me. Tori.
Fuck, she heard every word.
Chapter 20: Stanzy
I’ve been on this amazing campus several times over the last four years and this is the first time I’ve come face to face with Jessup.
He’s a fucking specimen of a man. Broad, thick shoulders taper to a slim waist. His t-shirt hugs tight to his body and his pecs are visible through the material. Roped forearms lead to long fingers. Khaki shorts hang perfectly off his narrow hips. Almond-shaped root beer eyes, black eyelashes, defined jawline, satin skin and luscious lips that made me melt when pressed to mine. He’s everything I remember, but somehow hotter and I can feel my body heat rising.
He’s the reason that Staley and I visited Mary Lou on one condition – no Pi Kappa frat parties. We partied with her sorority sisters and actually went to a few other frat parties, but never to a Pi Kappa party where we knew Jessup would be with his friends, teammates and jersey chasers (that’s what Lou called them). But she swore the football boys wouldn’t be here tonight and the baseball players really wanted us to come by. I was starting to think she lied to me until Rhodes confirmed they were here only because their dinner was cancelled.
“Fuck,” I sigh and grip the back of my neck with both hands. “You said he wouldn’t be here, Lou.”
“Well they were supposed to have a football party,” Mary Lou says between clenched teeth as she stares Finn down. “Don’t worry about him. You got the rock and the billionaire fiancé. Fuck him.”
I nod, but seeing him was like a kick to the teeth and a shot through my heart.
“It’s fine. I mean it’s not, but it is. Control the controllables. Right?” I quote our old volleyball coach at Cathedral. It was a saying she drilled into us. It means to control what we can and not worry about things we can’t. In volleyball that means we worry about our own game and not worry about the refs or opposing coaches or fans heckling. We can’t control those things, but we can control how we play the game. I need to control this game because right now it feels like I’ve lost it.
“I guess if that’s what you need to tell yourself,” Staley says with a shrug. “Maybe you should talk to him? This would be the chance for closure. What you’ve repeatedly said you needed, right?”
“Why bother? She’s engaged to the perfect man,” Mary Lou sighs and I can practically see the hearts in her eyes as she thinks about Chipper. When Mary Lou left for Cambria, she and Kai broke up. She’s been busy earning her degree and trying to secure a sugar daddy simultaneously. She thinks Chipper walks on water.
“You should be marrying that conceited dick then,” Staley snaps. Staley was all in on the Chipper bandwagon when we first started dating. He was charming and rich, he proposed to me in Paris under the Eiffel Tower for fuck’s sake, and she really
enjoyed lounging on his boat on Peace Lake in the summers. But then we both saw a new, possessive side of him. One that quite honestly isn’t very flattering.
“I would if Stanzy wants to part with that iceberg on her finger,” Mary Lou snaps back while simultaneously swooning over my six carat cushion-cut solitaire engagement ring. It’s gaudy and nothing that I would have chosen for myself, but Chipper is eccentric and everything he has and does is larger than life.
“You guys, this isn’t helpful.”
“So, you ladies all went to high school with Rhodes?” Stoner asks.
We nod.
“What’s his deal?”
“What do you mean?”
“I don’t know. The dude ruled this school with his boys for the last four years, but never seemed truly happy. He is a football god amongst us mortals. But he’s,” Stoner pauses searching for the right word, “empty. It’s weird. Even when he was dating one of the hottest chicks on campus it seemed like he was still never satisfied. He was always chasing something.”
“We don’t know. We haven’t seen him in almost four years.” Staley replies.
I can’t answer because I’m now thinking about Jessup dating one of the “hottest chicks on campus.” I remember seeing pictures of them on his Instagram and it broke my fucking heart. Stoner’s right, she was stunning. Tori, her name is engraved in my brain. I figured they broke up when he stopped posting pictures of them together at parties and softball games last year.
“So, you dated, Rhodes?” Finn asks.
I nod. “Yeah, senior year.”
“He’s a really good guy, but I agree with Stoner. Maybe you’re the thing he’s been chasing.”
“He’s never chased me. He hasn’t even reached out in the last four years.”
“That’s Rhodes for you. So fucking stubborn when he’s committed,” Finn says.
“Committed to what?”
“Apparently staying away from you,” he replies as he takes a swig of his beer.
“Oh fuck, incoming,” one of the other baseball guys whisper yells.
I turn around just in time to feel a fist connect with my cheek.
Completion (Cambria University Series Book 3) Page 19