by Pace, Pepper
The first night that she went to sleep, she was surprised that she woke up the next morning with no memory of dreams. She went through her day robotically, barely able to wait until she was tired enough to fall asleep.
Thoughts of Angel consumed her days. She would find herself smiling at odd moments and would touch her lips at the memory of their first kiss. His first kiss. Her heart beat would quicken as she replayed his lips on breasts. She wanted to see him, had never wanted it more than she did now.
She engaged in tasks that were sure to tire her. After work she went to the grocery store, scrubbed the floors and then took a long hot bath. By the time she went to bed she was truly tired.
“Angel…” She murmured as she fell asleep. What if it took him months to return or even years? “Angel, please come…”
“I’m here.” She opened her eyes and they were standing in a vast field. She spun in a slow circle. She’d never been here before. It was bright outside and she squinted at him.
“Where are we?”
He shrugged. “Just a place.” He reached out and took her hand and even though it was natural between them, something he had done all of her life, her body shivered. They began to walk and Leslie took a deep breath because there was something she had to face, even though part of her only wanted to rejoice in being with him.
“Angel, am I going to die?” She asked it quickly before she lost her nerves.
He stopped walking and faced her, taking both of her hands into his. “I’ve never seen your death and if I did I would never tell you. Your death is mine, too, you know.” He smiled slightly at that. She didn’t. She still wasn’t relieved.
“I’ll show you.” He said solemnly.
She nodded. “God, I want to tell you not to, but I can’t live with knowing and not knowing.”
“Ok.” They continued to walk until they were no longer in the field but in a room.
“No…” She moaned as she looked about in sudden understanding. “Nooo…” she sobbed.
Angel looked at her, the her whose hand he was holding—and not the her that lay strapped into a hospital bed with wild hair and wild eyes screaming to be released.
She had been institutionalized.
Leslie felt as if she could drop to her knees, she felt weak. Angel squeezed her hand gently.
She stared at the image of herself strapped to a hospital bed. She was struggling against the restraints frantically, screaming to be let go, screaming for them to get the letter. The letter was on the stereo and would prove that she was sane.
Leslie felt tears sprout in her eyes at the agony that she was to endure. But what letter? She looked at Angel for an answer. He raised his brow as if to say that he had nothing to say.
Okay, there was going to be a letter and she had to remember everything that she could… because she would write the letter. Frantically she took an assessment of the contents of the room
There was just the bed, two doors…linoleum floor. There was a window with ugly orange curtains. And at the window…Leslie walked to the window ledge. A small bouquet of lilies set in a pretty vase. She picked up the note. It was from her boss at the diner. Damn, and all of this time she had thought that he was just an ill tempered, demanding asshole. This was very nice of him, because his flowers stood alone; no one else had bothered.
She turned and looked at Angel but he was staring with a broken expression at the Leslie strapped to the bed. The begging, the screaming, the writhing against the straps, desperate to be heard finally got to her and Leslie ran over to herself to tell the frightened girl that she could hear her, that she would be okay.
But there was a flash of movement and Angel’s hand was suddenly clamped over her mouth.
“No!”
She gave him a hurt and confused look before roughly pulling his hand from her mouth. “You can’t hear us and you wouldn’t want to--as much as you may think you do, you wouldn’t.”
“How do you know?! Look at me over there Angel!” She sobbed pointing at the writing figure in front of her. “I need to help her!”
“Not like that. Don’t make her hear voices from someone that isn’t quite her.”
He turned from her towards the Leslie that sobbed in her restraints, begging for someone to read the letter. His face was broken in anguish as he reached for her bound hand. But his went right through hers. His chest hitched as he stared down at her. For a moment all of his attention was on the woman that was screaming over and over about the letter. He hovered over her trying to stroke her hair, trying to touch her face. But his touch just went through her.
She felt a surge of jealousy at the Leslie that wasn’t quite her…and then her chest seemed to expand and there was such a feeling of love that it almost overwhelmed her. He loved her, his love for her was so intense that she could never ever doubt it again. He would have anguished over her molestation, over her drug use, over her self destruction—powerless to do anything but watch.
He finally looked at the Leslie that stood a few steps away watching with dawning realization.
“I can’t do anything! Do you understand, now? I’m useless to you!”
~***~
Leslie tied the apron around her waist and got busy filling the salt and pepper shakers. Then she polished the napkin holders and scrubbed the shelves that the knick knacks set upon. She accomplished all of this before her work day had even begun. When Glenn walked into the restaurant he walked past the polished full napkin holders, past the neat shelves without even noticing. He went straight to his office to begin his morning office work. Leslie didn’t mind. All she knew is that Glenn was the only one that would send her flowers.
When she got home she sat down at her desk and opened the notebook that she had purchased after work. She tapped the ink pen on the desk for a while then she picked up the hastily scribbled note that contained the details of the dream from days before. She re-read it and then picked up the pen and began to write.
…I’m not exactly sure what is going to happen or who is going to read this. What I do know is that I’m supposed to convince you that I am not crazy. Since I was a little girl I have been able to see my own future within my dreams. Well yesterday I had a dream that was terrifying. If you are reading this letter you know that this letter has been sealed in an envelope that was mailed on November 12, 1992. If you are reading this then I am in a mental hospital some months later…
When she was done writing, she put the sheets of paper into an envelope and put her own return address on it to be dropped off at the post office on her way in to work the next day. She stood up and stretched, feeling her back crack. She had written for over two hours. But before she could go to bed she had one last thing to do. Leslie took a deep breath and picked up her phone. She dialed while she sat on the edge of the couch.
“Hello, Michael? We need to talk…”
Chapter 6
Angel and Leslie were sitting in a dream Starbucks drinking dream caramel macchiatos. Angel was wearing a whipped cream moustache and Leslie was chuckling, she couldn’t help it, he had no idea.
“Good, huh?” She asked while taking another sip.
He nodded his head. “It’s really sweet.” Leslie would always pass the Starbucks and the buppies and yuppies sitting around using their laptops or reading the Wall Street Journal as they consumed their expensive beverages. They looked like members of an exclusive club. She was on a tight budget and anything other than dream Starbucks was normally out of the question.
She leaned forward and kissed his whip cream moustache sensually, allowing her tongue to clean him. She sat back with a satisfied grin when she heard his soft groan.
“So you’ve never actually tasted this before; or anything for that matter? You don’t eat.”
“Well…” He slowly traced the rim of his white ceramic mug. “We ate a mud pie once.” He placed his finger in his mouth, licking away the whipped cream that had collected on it, not realizing how completely sexy that simple move
was.
Her eyes were glued to his delectable lips. “We did?” She spoke absently.
“Yes we did.”
“Huh…” She drew in her lower lip and bit it lightly. “Did we like it?”
He was nodding, eyes glued to her lips. “Yes we did. It tasted like chocolate.”
“Angel.” She gave him a serious look. “Do we only do the things that I want to do?”
“Well, yeah, Leslie. It’s your dreams.”
“Wow. But this is your life, too.”
He shrugged. “I don’t mind.”
“Well what do you want to do? Today, we’re going to do whatever YOU want”
He gave her a searching look before lowering his eyes and blushing. They’d been together for weeks now; meeting as if they were going on real life dates. Most of the time they talked and she tried to solve the mystery of his existence…sometimes there was time to kiss. But there was never time for more because he would suddenly speak those magic words, ‘Wake up.’
She washed the blush creep up from his neck and knew what Angel wanted to do because it’s what she wanted to do. Leslie held her breath, feeling a slight tremble travel up her spine. “Did you want to…make love?”
He peeked at her. “I’ve never done that before...”
“I could…show you.”
He nodded. “Yes.”
She stood up and then hesitated. “Um, you do have a penis, right?”
Laughter rolled easily from his lips. “Shall I just show you?”
They both laughed and when he stood they were immediately back in her bedroom. She looked around curiously.
“We could go anywhere in the world…maybe the universe, and this is where you want to be?”
He nodded. “If it’s okay with you?”
Leslie smiled and kicked off her shoes. When she reached to undo her pants Angel placed his hand over hers. He leaned in and kissed her gently and then unbuttoned and unzipped them.
He undressed her with great care, even kneeling to slip the pants from her legs. When she was down to her panties and shirt he carefully stripped the shirt from her body and dropped it to the floor. He walked around to stand behind her in order to unlatch her bra. He slipped it from her shoulders and let it drop to the floor as well.
Leslie wanted to turn but instead waited patiently and then she felt his soft lips on her shoulders. He kissed a trail from one shoulder to the other. Her eyes closed. He always handled her with such gentleness. She wasn’t used to that.
He took a step forward and she could feel that he was completely nude. She concentrated on the feel of him flush against her back. His hands came around to hold her as his kisses moved to her neck. She could hear his strained breathing as he fought to maintain control. Slowly she turned.
God…he was beautiful. He only stood about a foot taller than her which made him at about five eleven. He was indeed white, not tanned; his chest even whiter than the parts of his body that she always saw.
Though he was slender in build, his chest was broad and his stomach taut with muscles. A thin line of hair sprouted just below his belly button and downward to a golden brown patch of pubic hair, much lighter then the brown curls on top of his head. She sighed when she saw that he was already partially erect, shaft thick and heavy.
He didn’t seem shy about his nudity, only about reaching out and touching her breast. He hesitated and gave her a questioning look and she nodded her consent. His hands were shaky when they touched her darkened nipples.
“Leslie…” He murmured.
“Hmmm.” She purred. With urgent hands he suddenly cupped her face and kissed her wildly, passionately. Her lips parted and she captured his tongue and suckled it. He groaned and opened his mouth slightly, gently thrusting into her accepting mouth. He pulled her close, lifting her body and then walked her silently to the bed. He alternated between watching her and kissing her, until he laid her onto the bed. Then he lay down next to her and looked at her body.
She reached out allowing her fingertips to touch his hard shaft and he drew in a quick breath and shuddered. He smiled at her and waited for her to do it again. She did; repeatedly.
“Do you want to touch me?”
He nodded and placed his hand on her belly, letting it glide down until he cupped her entire mound in his hand. His finger slipped past the slippery folds of her tender flesh and Leslie arched her back with a gasp.
“Should I stop?”
“No. Move on top of me, I’m as ready as I can get.”
He moved to nestle between her parted legs. He never took his eyes from her. He reached between them and guided himself into her and watched as she gasped and closed her eyes. Angel paused and she opened her eyes and looked at him. She smiled and once he saw that she liked it he pushed into her until he was completely engulfed within her.
She was finding it hard to talk but directed him to move in and out. “Ah…” She cried out as he gently withdrew only to push back into her. With each gentle thrust he was responding with his own soft moans.
“Faster now!” She cried out.
“Are you sure?” But he didn’t wait for a response, he moved his hips rapidly, pushing in and then pulling out, faster and faster. Leslie’s legs came up to wrap around his hips. She threw her head back and cried out his name.
“Oh Angel!” His muscles strained as he worked hard to please her and to bring her to climax. But soon he was the one climaxing. With a shudder and a cry of his own his hips pumped even faster until with one last groan, he collapsed onto her body.
“Leslie…” He tried to catch his breath. “I’m sorry. I couldn’t wait.”
She bumped him with her pelvis until he propped up on his elbow and looked at her with hooded eyes. She kissed him until his heart beat quickened. Before long he was back inside of her and this time he did not cum until after she had reached a loud, heart racing, body jerking orgasm of her own.
Later they lay in each other’s arms and Leslie knew that very soon Angel would tell her that it was time for her to wake up.
“Angel?”
“Hmm?”
“What’s your real name?”
“My real name?”
She looked up at him. “Yeah.”
“I don’t have a real name. I’m not real.”
“Shhh…” She said quickly. “Don’t say that. You are very real.”
He stroked her hair as he watched her. “It’s time for you to wake up.”
“No!” But that word was not spoken in her dream. She no sooner said it then she was opening her eyes into her bedroom, and of course, Angel was nowhere to be seen.
~1991 Fall~
“Leslie. I need for you to come into my office.”
“Oh, ok Glenn.” She looked at her boss as he headed into his office wondering what she’d done wrong. Glenn was a fifty plus year old man with a young wife and a son and daughter that he spoiled rotten. He very seldom smiled and was a man of few words. He could yell real loud when he had to but despite all of this he was fair and a good employer.
She told the other two waitresses that she had to be off the floor. The news wasn’t received well and Leslie promised to be back as quickly as possible. She had worked hard for her tips and didn’t want to see them going to another waitress.