by Ivy Smoak
James laughed. "No. Do you like it?"
"I've never seen it worn better. So they're still refusing to learn the actual rules of Pretty Pretty Princess? It's just a free-for-all with jewelry?"
"They have no idea how to play, but Scarlett and Soph insist that it's their favorite game. I think they just like torturing Axel."
"Speaking of Axel. What did he whisper to Scarlett to calm her down? She's an extremely sore loser and I know she was about to throw a fit."
James laughed. "That kid's a bad whisperer. He said that she was the prettiest princess he ever saw."
"No way. Did he really?"
"That's a direct quote."
"Aw," I said. "That's the most adorable thing I've ever heard."
"Tyler can joke around all he wants about Scarlett being in love with his son. But that boy is just as smitten with her."
I laughed. "I think they make a cute couple."
"They're only three and a half."
"Exactly. And they're already perfect for each other."
James shook his head. "They're practically cousins. Axel calls us Uncle James and Aunt Penny. And Scarlett does the same with Tyler and Hailey."
"Oh, the forbidden nature of it all. Like that hasn't ever intrigued a girl?"
"They're three and a half," he said again. "I don't think they even know what forbidden means. Besides, Scarlett isn't allowed to date until she's 30."
I laughed. "If she was more like me you wouldn't have to worry so much. I didn't even have my first kiss until college."
"But then you started sleeping with your professor. You're a terrible influence."
"Me? I'm the one saying I'd be happy if she ended up with a boy we already know and love."
"Now that I know what it's like to have a daughter, I'm lucky your father didn't kill me. I'm going to want to murder anyone who even kisses Scarlett." He pulled away from me and reached up to unhook his necklace. "I'll be right back. I need to de-princess myself." He winked at me and disappeared back into the family room.
Chapter 17
Thursday
I picked up the last slice of pizza and took a huge bite. "Today was way better than the beach. And honestly, I was craving this pizza, not Grottos."
"Really? Did you finally just admit that Grottos is second best to Totonno's Pizzeria?"
"I was just in the mood for it."
"You, Mrs. Hunter, are officially a New Yorker."
"I am not. I'm a Delawarean." But I smiled at the thought of truly being a New Yorker.
James laughed. "Do you ever want to go back?"
I set my slice of pizza down. "You know, I thought I would. Especially once we had kids. But our whole life is here." I looked into the other room where the kids were bouncing around the room giggling. They were addicted to this game where an elephant shot butterflies out of its nose. They had to run around catching the butterflies in their nets before they hit the ground. It was one of the only things that could entertain all of them for at least an hour, so it was one of my favorite games too. "Suburbia wouldn't really feel like home anymore," I said and turned back to James. "I do wish my parents visited more, though."
"Your mom has been threatening to stay with us for a few weeks after the baby is born. So we'll be seeing plenty of them soon enough."
"Why does the thought of my mother staying here bother you so much? You really don't have to put them up in a hotel every time they visit. We have plenty of room."
He leaned forward slightly. "The thought of your parents hearing us make love doesn't exactly get me going."
I laughed. "We're not going to be having sex after the baby is born. For awhile anyway."
"Don't remind me." He put his chin in his hand and stared at me.
I lifted up my slice of pizza again.
"You know, I wouldn't mind if it was a boy."
I stopped chewing mid-bite. That was the first time James had ever said that. The whole time I was pregnant with Scarlett he insisted it was going to be a girl. And he had been doing the same this time. "Really?"
"I don't know. It might be fun to have another guy in the house. And I could teach him how to throw a football. And hit a baseball." He grabbed the piece of pizza out of my hand and took a bite. "It wouldn't be all bad is what I'm saying."
I couldn't even believe my ears. "You want a boy."
He laughed. "I didn't say that. I said I wouldn't mind if it was a boy."
"No, you totally want a little boy. If it was a boy, what would you want to name him?"
"I don't know."
We hadn't really discussed boy names at all, but I had a list in my head. "What about Rowan?"
James scrunched up his nose.
"Lucas." When he didn't have a reaction, I decided to just start giving him more options. "Noah. Oliver. Elijah. Ryan."
He just stared blankly at me.
"James Junior?"
He laughed. "Absolutely not. Rob Junior is going to be enough juniors."
"Jace?"
"Two J names in the house would be bad. You'd probably yell Jace when you meant to yell James."
I laughed. "I don't make a habit of yelling at you."
"But if you did, it would be a problem."
"How about Liam Hunter?" I held my breath as I waited for his response. Liam was at the very top of my mental list.
"Yeah. Maybe. But it's probably going to be a girl." He leaned forward and put his hand on my stomach. "Isn't that right, Arya?"
I laughed. "We are not naming her after a Game of Thrones character. I've already vetoed that one."
"But you like Game of Thrones too. I don't understand what the big deal is."
"Everyone is going to be naming their little girls Arya. And it doesn't even sound good with Hunter."
"Arya Hunter," he said slowly. "It slides right off the tongue."
"Fine, it sounds okay. I just feel like I picture the character from the show when you say it. I don't want our daughter having an identity crisis."
"That character from the Big Bang Theory has the name Penny. Does seeing that show give you an identity crisis?" He let his hand drop from my stomach.
"No. But I look nothing like her."
James laughed. "So if our daughter comes out with red hair, which she probably will given our last one, we can name her Arya since she'll look different from the character?"
"That's not what I said."
"But we couldn't name her Sansa because they'd both have red hair and it would be super confusing for her growing up."
"I don't know. No one had my name growing up. The Big Bang Theory didn't come out until I was in high school."
"Well, plenty of kids had the name James and I turned out fine. By the way, Liam is on the top of the list for boy's names this year, so doesn't that kind of count that name out?"
"You've been looking at the list of most popular boy's names?"
"I mean...I may have glanced at it."
I smiled and grabbed his hand, pulling it back to my stomach. "I swear to you, this is a little boy."
His eyes twinkled as he spread his fingers out. "You said that last time."
"Everyone likes to rub that in my face. But now I have experience. And I'm telling you James, I feel it. He's stronger and more energetic and he's just...he's a he."
"I'm kind of used to coming home and asking how my girls are doing." He stared at my stomach. "What if it is a boy? What if I mess him up?"
His words hurt me because I knew what he was referring to. But how could he think that? He was so good with Scarlett. He'd be good with a son too. "You're not your parents, James."
He continued to stare at my stomach.
"And you're the best father I know. You know, my dad never played Pretty Pretty Princess with me."
James laughed. "God, I really want it to be another girl." He leaned down and placed a kiss against my stomach. "But I guess the name Liam isn't so bad if it's not."
I touched the bottom of his chin so that
he'd look up at me. "You're a great father. The sex of the baby doesn't matter. It's the love that you have that makes you so wonderful."
A pounding on the front door made me jump.
"Who could that be?" James said as he stood up. "If it's Rob dropping more children off, I'm not letting them in this time."
I laughed and followed James to the door. I did not expect to see Scarlett being held out to us when the door opened.
"I believe this little girl belongs to you." Porter, the head of our security detail, set Scarlett down in the foyer. He patted her head affectionately.
"Scarlett, how did you get out of the apartment?" James said sternly.
"The door." She pointed to the very obvious answer behind her.
"You know you're not supposed to leave without an adult," I said. Or at all. Seriously, how was she getting through the child locks?
"Mr. Porter said I wasn't in trouble." She blinked innocently up at us.
"Did he?" James said and knelt down in front of her. "Pumpkin, why did you leave without telling us?"
"I saw a real butterfly outside. And I wanted to catch it. I was supposed to get to play with the animals today."
"You should have asked us to come with you."
"But you would have said no! Mommy can never do anything because the storks haven't come yet. It's not fair!"
"I'm just going to..." Porter's voice trailed off as he walked back into the hall and closed the door behind him.
"Pumpkin, Mommy will do whatever you want as long as we stay inside, okay?" James said. "It's just too hot out today."
"It's not fair!" Scarlett screamed again. "Grandpa was going to take us to the zoo today. You promised! I want the zoo!"
"Scar," I said as soothingly as I knew how. "I'm sorry about the zoo. But we can go a different day, okay?"
My words didn't help at all. She just looked at me and shrieked at the top of her lungs. Tears immediately started falling from her eyes.
"Scarlett," James said sternly. "That is enough. Plans change. We'll go a different day."
She screamed even louder. It was like a chain effect and in a second I heard Sophie crying from the other room.
Damn it. One crying kid was bad enough. "Please look at Mommy," I said as I knelt down next to James. "I promise you we'll go a different day. We can even take Sophie and Axel with us."
"You're a liar! You're a mean mommy!"
Ouch.
"Scarlett Hunter, go to our room right now," James said. His tone probably would have made me go to my room.
"I hate the baby! I hope the storks cook her too long in the oven!"
"Now," James said.
"Fine! But you're a mean daddy too!" She screamed at the top of her lungs again and ran past us.
I sat backwards onto the floor. "What the hell was that? Her scream could rupture someone's eardrums."
"I have no idea." James ran his fingers through his hair as he stood up. "I hate when she calls me a mean daddy. How can she use such a cute phrase to break my heart in two?"
"She doesn't mean it," I said as he helped me to my feet. "We should go calm Sophie down."
A door slamming upstairs made me wince.
"I'll handle Soph," James said. "You can go talk to that little monster upstairs that I don't recognize at all."
I sighed and followed the path of the little girl I didn't recognize either. Scarlett rarely ever screamed. She'd cry when she was upset, but what I just witnessed was more of a wild banshee. What had gotten into her? I ran my hand across my stomach. She didn't mean it, baby boy. She's going to love you.
I made my way upstairs and knocked on her door.
"Go away!"
"Scar, can I please come in?"
"No!"
I opened up the door anyway. Scarlett was lying in the middle of her floor with her face buried in the carpet.
"Hey," I said and slowly sat down cross-legged beside her. "Can you please look at me?" I gently ran my fingers through her curly hair.
"No," she mumbled into the floor.
"Okay." I lay down beside her and just stared at her in silence for a few minutes until she finally turned her head toward me.
"Mommy, it's not fair. The stork is going to take the baby. And then the snake is going to take you. And I'll only have Daddy. And Daddy will be too sad to be a good daddy when you're gone."
For just a second, I was too stunned to say anything. "Scar, what are you talking about? There are no evil snakes, it was just a movie. I'm not going anywhere."
She scrunched her eyes closed. "We need you, Mommy. It's not fair."
"Baby girl, I'm not going anywhere. That movie wasn't real. It's just made up. There are no evil snakes."
"No, Mommy." She scooted forward and wrapped her arms around me. "He was already here."
Her words sent a chill down my spine. What was she talking about? "Scarlett, who's here?"
"The snake! Mommy, I don't even want a baby sister. No one asked me. I never wanted one. I just wanted you." She was crying again. I could feel her tears soaking through my shirt.
"You have me," I said and ran my fingers through her hair again. "I promise I'm not going anywhere." I held her tight as she cried. We really shouldn't have let her watch Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. First the stork story and then the movie that was giving her nightmares. Were we awful parents?
She lifted her tear stained face to mine. "You promise?"
I swallowed hard. "I promise I'm not going anywhere." I didn't want to lie to her. But she believed in Santa Claus. She believed in the Easter Bunny. What would another white lie hurt? The logic was sound, but for some reason I felt an ache in my chest. She might lose me before she finds out that Santa isn't real. That there is no Easter Bunny. Would she resent me forever if I broke that promise? "I promise," I said again. God, I was an awful parent.
She sniffled through her nose. "Am I in trouble?"
"No." I kissed her forehead. "But you need to promise me you won't leave the house without a grown-up. And when you don't get what you want, you need to talk to us instead of screaming at the top of your lungs." I tried to give her a stern look, but it just made her smile.
"I promise."
I found a little solace in the fact that she would most likely not keep either of those promises either. Maybe she did get the lying thing from me. "Now, we're going to go finish catching fake butterflies and then have another slumber party. But this time you'll be having one with Soph and Axel." I sat up and pulled her into my lap.
She scrunched her mouth to the side, like she was thinking. "With my best friends?"
"That's right."
"Axel isn't one of my best friends. My best friends are you, Daddy, and Sophie."
"Scar." I frowned. Where had all this sass come from? "Why would you say that? You and Axel get along so well. Did something happen?"
"No, Mommy, he's my boyfriend. That's different. You can't be best friends with your boyfriend."
Oh my God. I couldn't help but smile. "Actually, you can be. Daddy's my best friend too."
"Really?"
"Mhm."
"What about Aunt Melissa? And Aunt Bee? And Aunt..."
"You can have more than one best friend. You just named a few yourself."
"Okay. Then Axel is my best friend and my boyfriend." She nodded her head like she was completely convinced of Axel's new title.
As we wandered out of her room, her little hand in mine, I really hoped that we could both keep our promises. I wanted her to stay safe. And I wanted to be there to witness it.
Chapter 18
Thursday
"James, what are you doing?" I put my hand out to block the lens of the video camera he was holding. I had just collapsed onto the couch after getting the least amount of butterflies in my net. And I was sweaty and gross from the exertion.
James continued filming me.
"Really, James." I held up my other hand, hoping it was enough.
"Scarlett,
go tickle Mommy," he said.
I started laughing as soon as Scarlett jumped onto my lap. I laughed even harder when Axel hit me in the back of the head with a pillow and Sophie joined in on the tickling session. "Cut it out, you guys!" I said through fits of giggles. It took me several minutes to get all three kids back on the ground.
James stepped closer to me with the camera. What was he doing? I picked up one of the throw pillows and tossed it at him.
He laughed and caught it in his free hand before joining me on the couch. I grabbed the camera out of his hands and pointed the lens at him. "You thought it would be fun to film me not being able to breathe?" I was staring into the little monitor on the camera. I slowly zoomed up on his face.
"No," he said.
Something about the way he said no made me look back up at him instead of at the screen.
"I just wanted to capture your laughter on film."
The same chill that Scar had given me when she was talking about snakes ran back down my spine. Did everyone think I was doomed? I looked back down at the screen on the video camera. "Why?" I asked. For some reason not staring directly at him made my question easier. I watched his eyebrows lower on the screen. I watched a dark expression cross over his face, one that I had never seen before. Again I felt a chill down my spine.
"Because I wanted to capture my favorite sound. It's the only thing that truly makes me happy," he said slowly.
I looked back up at him. He wanted to capture my laughter on film. So that when I died, he could still listen to it? I swallowed hard. I wasn't going to die. I was going to live long enough to see my daughter lie again. And to keep seeing him laugh. I looked down at the camera. "I don't think that's true, James," I said as I slowly got up off the couch. "Get 'em kids!"
The three kids launched themselves on James and started tickling him. His laughter rippled through the awkward silence his words had left. I looked down at the camera and smiled. That sound made me happy too. But so did Scarlett's laughter. And Soph's. And Axel's. Before I gave birth to my son, I'd need James to promise me what he currently refused to promise. I refused to go into labor before he promised me that he would keep living if I stopped. That he would keep laughing. That he would keep our children smiling.