“I got your arrangement. I loved it.” It had actually hurt how much he’d loved it. His chest had ached with a hollow pain of regret when he saw that it was filled with pineapple.
She’d remembered his favorite fruit.
When she spoke again, her voice held a formal quality to it, like she was speaking to a stranger or one of her patients. “It was the least I could do for your generous gift. I’m so glad you enjoyed it.” There was a short awkward pause before she hooked her thumb in the direction behind her. “I better go get Farmer.”
“Not the Dell,” he grinned.
“Right.” She smiled a real smile and just like that the heavens opened and a choir of angels sang the “Hallelujah Chorus.” Her smile was a religious experience.
She turned again and he watched her walk away from him. Before she made it halfway down the block he called out, “The Bodyguard.”
“What?” she asked as she pivoted back around.
“Farmer. He’s named after Kevin Costner in The Bodyguard. Right?”
“Yeah.” Her brows furrowed. “How did you know that?”
“It was your favorite movie. You used to say that someday you’d have your own Frank Farmer except he wouldn’t leave.”
“You remember that?” Her voice was so quiet, he’d barely heard her from several yards away.
“I remember everything.” He heard the rasp in his tone.
Her bottom lip trembled, and for a brief heartbreaking minute, he thought she was going to start crying. But as her lower lids pooled with liquid emotion, she shut them tightly and once again shook her head, like she was internally reprimanding herself.
This time she didn’t open them with determination, she just turned. Her voice quivered as she called out, “See you tonight.”
“See you tonight,” he parroted.
It was driving him crazy that he wasn’t sure what was going on with her. Why she was having such odd reactions to things. But he was sure that he was going to see her tonight and it wouldn’t be with his brother, and for now, that was enough.
Chapter 10
“Didn’t you and that boy used to run around together, dear?” Mrs. Lewis leaned over to ask Eliza as they both watched in disbelief as Neil gyrated inappropriately around the dance floor.
“A long, long time ago. In high school.” That wasn’t the first time she’d been asked about Neil and her relationship with him, and Eliza knew that it wasn’t going to be the last.
The entire evening, whenever Neil caught a glimpse of Eliza he would point at her and yell, “There’s my girl.” It was the same thing he used to do in high school whenever he saw her in the halls or the cafeteria. He’d even do it playing football or baseball when he saw her in the stands. Back in the day, it had made her feel special.
But that felt like a lifetime ago. Everything was different now. They’d been teenagers then. Neil was the most popular boy in school and he never failed to melt all the girls’ hearts with his public displays of affection. His antics had always been met with a low rumble of “awws” and “how sweets” from the female population of their high school. Now they were adults at a black tie fundraiser in a ballroom at the country club. He was as drunk as a skunk and no one was amused, male or female. In fact, his shouting had garnered disgusted looks of disapproval from both genders, which she totally understood.
“Well.” Mrs. Lewis patted Eliza’s hand. “We were all young once. Let’s just hope your taste in men has improved.”
Eliza grinned as she nodded, but her internal voice was saying, nope. No improvement here.
She wished there had been. Her first husband had used her as a pawn in a chess game. He’d won and discarded her. Her second husband had more than just a wandering eye, he’d had a wandering penis. And it didn’t matter because she was in love with someone else the whole time. She was in love with a man that was unavailable, both physically and emotionally. He kept telling her and showing her as much, but her glutton-for-punishment heart just kept on chugging up Love Mountain like the Little Engine that Could.
This afternoon, when she’d bumped into Nate, literally, she’d almost had an orgasm, in broad daylight, on the sidewalk of one of the busiest areas in Harper’s Crossing. And then when he’d figured out who Farmer was named after well that had been game over, she’d had an emotion-gasm. Her heart had exploded with awe and love. Tears had sprung to her eyes and as much as she tried to pull it together, it was no use. Telling herself not to feel things at this point was about as useful as an ashtray on a motorcycle.
By the time she’d entered the groomer to pick up Farmer, she’d realized that she was hopelessly, completely in love with Nate Holmes, and there was absolutely nothing she could do about it.
Her silver lining for the day, though, was seeing her handsome man after he’d had a bath and his nails clipped and hearing the sisters that owned Bones, Balls & Bellyrubs go on and on about what a good boy Farmer had been. They said he’d even helped a few of the dogs that had had separation anxiety from their owners. The dogs had been crying and he sat by them, worked his calm Alpha magic and they’d settled right down. After singing his praises they’d said that he was welcome anytime to just come hang out. Farmer had taken it all in as he’d sat tall, proudly wearing the brand new red and black, Bones, Balls & Bellyrubs bandana that they’d tied around his neck.
She might not have the actual bodyguard that she wanted, but she had Farmer.
“You know you don’t have to sit here and babysit me all night, dear.” Mrs. Lewis patted her hand again. “There’s plenty of young men besides Mr. Holmes, who I’m sure would love to fill your dance card.”
“Oh, no.” Eliza shook her head. “I’m good.”
There’s only one name she wanted to put on her dance card. Unfortunately, he was on the dance floor with his stunningly beautiful, brilliant, charitable, funny, cool, pediatric surgeon date. Not that anything would’ve been different if he was here dateless. He’d been avoiding her all week and was doing the same thing tonight.
He and Bailey had arrived just as the cocktail hour was ending and right before dinner was being served. She hoped that the people standing around her hadn’t heard her audible gasp when she laid eyes on him. He was wearing a black tux with a charcoal gray tie and the simple black mask he donned made him look like a cross between Christian Grey in Fifty Shades of Grey and Christian Bale in Batman. She’d seen him in a tuxedo as a teenager, but that memory did nothing to prepare her for the visual devastation seeing him in a tailored tux as a man would produce in her.
Neil was wearing the same tux, or at least one that was indistinguishable. When she’d seen her ex, she’d had no reaction. Neil was good-looking, obviously. He was tall with an athletic frame. Olive skin that complimented his dark hair and eyes. But, he didn’t come close to having the sex appeal that his brother had.
Nate had an air of authority. He was controlled. Measured. Dominant. Intelligence, strength and confidence effortlessly exuded from him. He walked into a room and the atmosphere changed. If she found out that actual molecules in the air multiplied or separated in reaction to his presence, she wouldn’t be the least bit surprised. It was magic. Or maybe it was just the pheromones he gave out.
Or maybe you’re just in love with him, her internal voice pointed out.
And it was right. She was in love with him. And it was miserable.
When they’d announced that dinner was served, she’d crossed the room to her table and they made brief eye contact. She saw a flash in his stare that, if it was anyone else, she would classify as heat, but since it was Nate she had to tell herself that she was most likely projecting her own feelings onto him. Then, before she could even enjoy it, bask in it, memorize it, it was gone. His eyes and expression were blank. No recognition. No acknowledgement. By the time she’d lifted her hand in a small wave he’d already looked away.
That was the first and last contact that they’d made all night. She’d hoped after they’d run in
to each other this afternoon, they were at least on friendly terms. But maybe her joke (that was so not a joke!) about her wanting him to see her in her lingerie had made him want to keep his distance. Maybe just like she wanted to avoid Neil, Nate wanted to avoid her.
Oh, no.
Was she Nate’s Neil?
No. She couldn’t be. That didn’t make any sense. She and Nate had never dated. They had never had any relationship besides friendship. Maybe that was it. Will wouldn’t feel like he had to check in with Chuckie. In fact (spoiler) at the end of Good Will Hunting, Will leaves without even saying goodbye to his best friend to go “see about a girl.” Maybe he still saw her as the Chuckie to his Will Hunting.
Whatever he considered her, his actions were telling her loud and clear that he was not interested. All week he’d literally been telling her he was not available. Her mind was listening, but her heart and hormones were doing their best elementary school impression of la-la-la-la-la I can’t hear you.
“Are you sure?” Mrs. Lewis tilted her head towards Eliza. “That dress sure would look good out there under those twinkly lights.”
Eliza glanced down at her dress and had to agree with Mrs. Lewis. Becca’s cousin-in-law Amber owned a dress boutique and designed most of what she sold there. She was making all of the bridesmaid’s dresses for Becca’s wedding and when Eliza had gone in for her first fitting, she’d seen this dress on a mannequin and had instantly fallen in love.
It was black and sleeveless with a high neck, sheer illusion bodice covered in subtle appliqué that would sparkle if the light hit it right. The chiffon skirt had a slit that went up to her mid-thigh and the back was bare, scooping daringly low. It was one of a kind and when Eliza had slipped it on, it felt like Amber had made it with her measurements in mind. Even the price tag hadn’t scared Eliza away. Of course, she hadn’t paid full price. Amber had insisted on a “welcome home” discount, which Eliza had tried to refuse, but to no success.
As much as she’d love to feel the chiffon brush back and forth against her freshly shaven legs as she swayed to the music under the sparkling lights, she knew better than to push her luck. Neil had no problem making a scene and not only would that be embarrassing for her, it would be associated with the sweet woman whose insistence on her husband’s retirement had been the catalyst for Eliza’s new lease on life. So there would be no dancing tonight.
“No. I’m really tired. It’s been a long week.” Eliza loved dancing, but she was scared if she headed out on the dance floor Neil would take it as his cue to twerk, or whatever the kids were doing these days, up against her and make more of a scene than he already had.
Eliza could see from Mrs. Lewis’ stubborn expression that the woman was not going to drop it, but her insistence was interrupted.
A server stepped up and placed his hand on her shoulder. “Ma’am, there’s a call for you.”
“A call?” Mrs. Lewis placed her hand on her chest. “For me?”
“Yes, ma’am. From your husband,” the server explained.
Mrs. Lewis had needed help getting in and out of Eliza’s car. She’d needed to lean on Eliza’s arm to make it up the ramp into the ballroom. But hearing that Dr. Lewis was calling had her up and out of her chair like an Olympic runner when the buzzer sounded. Eliza was on her feet as well.
“Oh, no!” She gripped her hands together tighter at her chest. “What’s wrong?! Is he okay?!”
“He’s fine, ma’am,” the young waiter’s eyes widened as he rushed to explain. “He said that he can’t find the remote for the DVD player and there’s nothing on TV.”
“Oh.” Mrs. Lewis slumped against Eliza in relief before reprimanding the server. “You could’ve led with that.”
Eliza had to give it to the poor kid, he honestly looked like he had no idea what he’d done wrong, but he apologized sincerely despite that. “I’m so sorry, ma’am.”
“Oh, it’s fine. You tell Winston I’ll get him the remote when I get home. He can channel surf until then.” Mrs. Lewis’ voice was still shaky and the color had drained from her normally rosy cheeks.
The young man nodded and left to relay the message.
“Why don’t you sit?” Eliza suggested. “I’ll go get our coats and have the valet bring the car around so it’s ready for us.”
“Oh no, honey. I don’t need to leave for a remote control.” Mrs. Lewis was trying to be convincing, but Eliza could see that the scare had taken its toll on her.
“Actually Mrs. Lewis, I really am tired. It’s been a very long week. But if you want to stay—”
“Oh no, no, dear. If you’re tired then yes, let’s go.”
Eliza recognized the relief in Mrs. Lewis’ eyes because it mirrored what she was sure was in hers. Both women had put on brave faces and pushed through the evening, but she was fairly certain the only place Mrs. Lewis wanted to be was by Dr. Lewis’ side. And she knew for certain the only place she wanted to be was anywhere Bailey and Nate were not.
They made a gorgeous couple, or whatever they were, and every time Eliza had snuck a peek at them through dinner they were talking, laughing—well Bailey was laughing, Nate was grinning—and very engaged with each other. And now they were on the dance floor slow dancing. His arms wrapped around her. His hands at the base of her spine.
There was only so much a girl could take of watching the man that she loved with someone else. She needed to get out of here. Eliza hoped there wasn’t a line at the coat check, because she could not get home to Farmer fast enough.
“I’ll be right back, Mrs. Lewis.”
* * *
As Nate led Bailey around the dance floor, out of the corner of his eye, he caught a glimpse of Eliza moving between the tables. Her hair swung in soft waves as she weaved through the crowded room. The dress she wore shimmered under the soft lighting of the ballroom, making her look even more angelic than usual.
Everything inside of him was screaming to go talk to her. He ached to see her smile. Look into her eyes. Hear her voice.
But he knew he couldn’t do any of that.
For one thing, he was here with Bailey. Even though they weren’t serious, she was his date. He would never disrespect her by paying attention to another woman.
He also knew if he went to speak to Eliza, Neil would see it as a challenge. So far, his brother had kept his distance from her tonight. Yes, he’d made an ass out of himself by yelling across the room a few times, but other than that he’d seemed to be more interested in a blonde cocktail server. But Nate knew if Neil saw him talking to or even looking at Eliza, he would be threatened by it and feel the need to prove to everyone that she was “his girl.”
So, as much as it was killing Nate to do so, he had kept his distance. He’d only made eye contact with her once and in that split second, the rest of the room, the town, the world had disappeared. With one look she’d captivated him, pulled him under her spell, sucked him into a vortex where she was all that existed. He’d almost not recovered from it.
After that happened, he’d known without a shadow of a doubt that it couldn’t happen again. His response hadn’t been solely because of how insanely sexy and stunning she looked, that was part of it of course, but not the main reason. The main reason for his visceral reaction was the connection he’d felt to her the moment their eyes met.
Nana had always talked about the fact that his Grandfather, Neil Stenson Holmes, II, was her soulmate. Most of the time she talked about him it was little things she missed and loved. The way he always held doors open for her. The way he smiled every time she sneezed because he thought it was adorable. How every day he’d woken up half an hour early before he went to work to make her coffee and hang her robe in front of the heater so she could wake up feeling warm, safe and taken care of. How he never let a day they were together pass without telling her he loved her and naming at least five reasons why, he’d called it his “daily five.” How if she was having a bad day, he’d move the dining room table, dim the lights and p
ut on Sinatra and they’d dance until her bad day was a distant memory.
But he remembered one conversation where she’d sat Nate down and told him that she wanted Nate to have her wedding ring when he was ready. But her stipulation was that he had to know, beyond a shadow of a doubt that the woman was his soulmate. She maintained that in the fifty-seven years that they’d had together before he passed, not one day had gone by that she ever doubted that fact.
Not even when they were separated when he was stationed in England during WWII for three years and she only received two letters from him.
Not even when he took a job out of state without discussing it with her and moved her away from her family and everything she knew when they had three children under the age of four.
Not when she almost had to give birth to her third child in the passenger seat of their Cadillac because they ran out of gas on the way to the hospital after he’d promised her that he would keep a full tank because she’d wanted to avoid that very situation.
Not even when she’d had to spend the last five years of his life as a stranger to him because of his dementia.
She’d explained that when she took her vows, when she promised in good times and bad, for better or worse, in sickness and health, till death do they part, she’d meant it. Not because of any religious or moral reason, but because he was it for her. He was hers forever. And if anyone ever asked her how she knew, how she’d been so sure, so unwavering, she always gave the same answer.
She said that it had never been a choice. They were connected. Not two individuals, but one. She said when she looked into his eyes her heart found its home. She belonged with him.
As romantic and sweet as that sentiment was, growing up Nate had always believed that it was just talk. He never questioned that Nana believed it to be true, but reality was not a fairytale. That was until Eliza Young had walked into science class. That was how he’d felt then and it was still how he felt now.
All He Desires – Nate & Eliza (Crossroads Book 12) Page 9