“What?” I prompted when he stopped.
“Well, your shots were different. Maybe the faster treatment made you have to be secured. I don’t know. Either way, there was no reason for the charade. Whoever did this to you wanted to terrorize you. I know you still think it was me, but I swear it wasn’t. I’d never hurt you or try to scare you. And when I find the dragon who did this…” He stopped talking, his clenched jaw muscle bulging. “They will pray for mercy they won’t get.”
I stared at him. His forehead vein was pulsing, his chest heaving. No one could act out fury that well, could they? Maybe he’s telling the truth. Wait, Sam. He’s still got a lot of explaining to do.
Like he’d read my mind, Blake said, “After the six months, Jaxon insisted on taking me camping. Looking back now, I’m sure his girlfriend told him to do that. They knew I’d morph, and Jaxon figured it’d be better camping than at home. It was sort of like yours, actually. One night I just woke up out of the tent, in the middle of the woods. I didn’t remember how I’d gotten there, so I just started running back to camp. Then all of a sudden, I was flying.”
Blake stared out the windshield. “It was exhilarating and freaky at the same time,” he mumbled. “I’m sure you felt the same way.”
I nodded. “I thought I’d dreamt it all.”
“Yeah, me too.” He hesitated and then glanced at me. “I saw you take off that night… prettiest damsel I’d ever seen,” he finally admitted, grinning. I shifted in my seat, my face flushing under his stare.
His eyes moved back to the road, and he continued. “I could tell you weren’t going to make it home before passing out, so I stayed with you. In camo, of course. I had to keep you safe. You were emitting all sorts of scents. You attracted a lot worse things than bears that night.”
I thought of Kory’s words. “Did anyone try to get me?”
Blake nodded. “But don’t worry, I took care of them.”
Them? I shuddered. “I had no idea.”
“Right before you woke up, I raced home and got Misty. I wanted to reassure you, let you know you were okay, but you would have bolted. We hadn’t officially met yet then.”
“Yeah, about that?” I asked.
He sighed. “I know, I know… I’m getting ahead of myself. Let me back up again. So after I’d morphed, Jaxon explained everything to me. He took me camping a lot, to help me learn who I was. Because once you’re a dragon or damsel, you’re not the same. I was lucky Jaxon’s girlfriend told him what it would be like for me. She told him to keep me near water, teach me to fish to help channel my desires and appetites, or else I’d lose myself completely to the dragon.”
“What do you mean?”
“You have to realize, Sam, that you are now no longer just human. You have dragonfly DNA in you now. Their ways come with it; they love to hunt and chase. They love a good thrill. They’re agile, fast, equipped to fight, and live a long time. Well, when you combine that with the human parts of us, like hormones, an interesting thing happens. One thing Tonbo hadn’t counted on. It’s not just our strengths that were added to. Yes, we can fly, our five senses are off the charts, but our frailties and weaknesses are magnified too. We crave adrenaline rushes and power. And it’s even worse for dragons then damsels.”
“Why?”
“Well, let’s just say dragonfly DNA really amps up our testosterone; a lot more than it does for girls. Many dragons turn violent quickly, want to have control, and want certain things more than they should.”
“Like what? You mean you want to have…” I flushed when my mind filled in the blank.
“Yes, our sex drives are pretty much out of control,” he finished for me.
I knew my cheeks were flaming red. I wasn’t sure why his statement made me so embarrassed. Probably because I didn’t like talking about sex. I felt like an awkward ten-year-old child with my parents staring down at me.
“It’s hard for damsels too. Don’t get me wrong. You feel invincible, like you can do anything and beat anyone that stands in your way.”
I nodded. “I know what you’re talking about,” I murmured. I thought of flying, diving in and out of the water. I’d felt empowered. I could see where it could be extremely dangerous if you gave into every craving.
“Jaxon looked out for me, did his best, but he didn’t understand what it was really like. The rush of being a dragon is addicting. I mean, don’t get me wrong. Kory and I did plenty of stupid things together, sneaking into places we shouldn’t, but soon, pranks weren’t enough for Kory. He always wanted the next thrill, to push it a little further. All he cared about was the adrenaline rush; he didn’t care who got in the way of that. And his attitude toward those who weren’t Dragon Fae grew worse. He started thinking he was better than they were. I mean, we were technically faster, stronger, and smarter. So you can see where a kid can get some messed-up views of who he really is. The one person who kept me grounded was Jaxon. Being around him reminded me of who I really was.”
Blake cleared his throat. “So when Tonbo told me I would outlive my family, including Jaxon, I sort of got depressed.”
“What?” I interrupted. Kory had mentioned long life too, but I’d been too upset to really think it through. “What do you mean?”
Blake’s eyes softened as he glanced over at me. “We live a very long time. Dragonfly lives are long for insects, so when their DNA combined with ours, it, well… extended our lives too. We still die, we aren’t immortal, but…”
I gasped. “How long do we live?”
“Tonbo’s the original dragon and he hasn’t died yet, so I don’t really know.”
“How old is he?”
He hesitated and then glanced over. “He was born in the 1800s.”
“What?” My head was spinning.
“He’s an old man now. I don’t know how much longer he will be here.” There was another hitch in Blake’s voice. “Most of us remain looking twenty or thirty for a long time. Around a hundred, we start aging again.”
“Are you serious? How is any of this possible?” What had started out feeling like a dream was rapidly becoming a nightmare. I didn’t want to live for hundreds of years—to outlive everyone I loved and cared about. Sadness filled me. I would watch my children, grandchildren, heck, great-grandchildren pass away. I gasped. That’s assuming we can even have kids! Maybe I’ll never get married now… Maybe a family is out of the question anyway. My stomach didn’t feel so good. I didn’t dare ask Blake about it. I wasn’t sure I could handle the answer just then.
“I know it doesn’t seem possible, but somehow it is. I’m sorry, Sam. I never wanted this for you. You didn’t need to be changed. You deserved a healthy, normal life.” He sighed heavily. “Kory loves the fact that we live so long. It’s one of the many things we disagree about. He doesn’t care about his future. Like I said, he is addicted to the rush of being a dragon. But I always felt like I needed more than that to be happy with what I was now. I needed to find a purpose.” He glanced at me, his gaze intense. “I found it when I was ten.”
“What was it?”
“More like who. I’d spent the night fishing in San Diego with some dragons, but that morning, I just sat on the beach, staring at the water, feeling restless. That’s when I spotted a girl out too far, being pulled under the waves. I heard her dad yelling, saw her older sister trying to grab her, but she was gone under the water before anyone could help her.”
I stared back at him, goose bumps crawling down my neck and arms. I knew the scene he was describing all too well.
His eyes studied my face, and then he stared at the road again. “I knew then what I needed to do. I hit the water at full speed and I found you, sinking like dead weight. When I grabbed your waist, you opened your eyes. You couldn’t see me, I was in camo, but your hands felt my arms and then traveled to my face.”
In all my horrible memories of being under the water, I couldn’t recall feeling anything like that. But why would Blake make that up? Maybe I’
ve suppressed more than I’d thought.
“I did?” I asked.
His brows gathered. “Yes, you don’t remember?”
“No.”
“I thought when you said at the bridge you felt like you weren’t alone, you were talking about me. You were definitely conscious, at least for a few seconds. I knew you were confused because you couldn’t see me, but you felt my face with your hands.”
I shook my head. “I must have blocked all that out. I just remember this feeling I had, well, more like a voice that said I’d be okay, to relax. That’s what I was talking about at the bridge.”
He glanced at me. “Oh.” He sounded disappointed.
“But you were the one who saved me?”
He gave me a half smile. “Yeah. You passed out right before we surfaced. I was terrified you’d died because you hadn’t gotten any air in before going unconscious. I swam you to your dad and made sure he got you to the shore safe. I stayed right next to you while they tried to resuscitate you. It was the longest minute of my life. When you coughed out water, I started breathing again. I’d found my purpose, Sam.” His eyes met mine. “It was you.”
Chapter 23
My face flushed. “Me? What do you mean?”
“I felt peace with what I’d become. If it meant I could save others, than it was worth out living all my family.”
Regardless whether or not I trusted him, I’d never seen Blake so open. For the first time, I began to understand him. He’d been only a kid, worried about the day he wouldn’t have his older brother to look out for him. He’d been lonely, and then he’d saved me. What little boy didn’t want to be a super-hero?
I met his gaze. “So you helped others too?”
“I did. Well, at least I tried, for a while. Most were little things, nothing too dramatic. But since you were the first one, I was sort of obsessed with you.” He glanced at me and chuckled. “I’m being totally honest here. What do you expect? You were a pretty girl, and I…well, I had a crush on you.”
I knew I shouldn’t like hearing those words, but they made me happy. I wasn’t sure what to say. To my relief, Blake kept talking. Maybe he has been dying to tell me everything after all.
“Kory teased me when I started flying here just to check on you. He told everyone on the island about my crush, made me sound like a stalker. By that point, I couldn’t care less what Kory said or did. When I saw you were in counseling, not dealing with the near drowning well, I felt like I needed to watch out for you. There was just something about you; I couldn’t leave you alone. I had to make sure you were safe.”
Now I stared at him. “So you have been watching me for years.”
He gave me a crooked grin. “Okay, I’ll admit saying it all out loud it does sound sort of creepy, but Sam, I would never hurt you and I’d never change you. Like I said, I wanted you to be happy, have a normal life.” His tone became firm.
“But what about Kate? Kory said you changed her.”
He glanced at me, but he said nothing. The car slowed, and he signaled to pull off on a small county road. We came to a rolling stop in the middle of farm fields, nothing for miles. Nerves fluttered through my stomach, and my fingers turned to ice. Was all that talking just to get my guard down?
He left the engine purring. I wanted to hold my hands in front of the heater vents, to warm them, I but folded my arms across my chest instead.
Blake faced me. “Kate’s a long story.”
“I’m listening.”
He let out a low whistle. “Kory thought I needed to accept my fate. He made fun of my hero escapades, thought they were ridiculous. When we hit the teenage years, it only got worse. He moved back to Durango in eighth grade, really to spite me, now that I think about it. He kept pressuring me to change you, but I wouldn’t. I thought the discussion was over, that he’d let it go, but I was wrong.”
His eyes turned sad. “Anyway, a couple years ago, Kory told me about this sick girl named Kate. He said there were other ways to be a hero ; I could help save someone who would die by changing her into a damsel. I’d promised myself that no matter how much I wanted to be with you, I wouldn’t change you for my own selfish reasons. You were healthy. You didn’t need saving again, at least not that way. But I was sixteen, and well… I am a guy.”
I stared at him. “So in other words, your hormones took over?”
His eyes seemed sad. “I hate to admit it, but yeah. I decided I would help Kate become a damsel. And then, maybe, if it just happened to work out, I’d have someone in my life too. I went to Tonbo, and he agreed. He told me I could have anything I wanted to make me happy.”
“That sounds sort of self-indulgent.”
“Not if you know Tonbo. He’s a good man. You’d need to meet him to understand.”
“I’d love to.”
Blake looked surprised. “You would?”
“Yes, why wouldn’t I? I’m a damsel. I want to know everything about him and his island.”
His smile reached his eyes. “I’ll take you there whenever you want. We could go now even.”
I bit my lip. I hated to admit I wanted to say yes. Somewhere along the line of Blake’s explanation, I’d begun to believe him. Maybe even trust him again.
“Finish telling me what happened with Kate first, then we’ll talk about the island.”
The light in Blake’s eyes immediately died. “Okay, but Sam, please know this isn’t one of my finer moments. I should’ve known better. Sick or not, I shouldn’t have thought I could change Kate so I’d have a girlfriend or even a friend. Kory did it all the time, but I found it repulsive the way he treated damsels.” He sighed. “But I guess I’m no better. I did it too.”
He stared out the windshield.
“I met Kate in the hospital. She didn’t have much time left. She’d had a heart transplant, but her body rejected it and her antibodies attacked it. When I explained what I could do, what the shots would do, she begged me to change her. She said she didn’t care what it meant, that she’d rather live. I tried to convince her parents to let her come to the facility in Santa Barbara, but they wouldn’t listen to me. They just kept saying, ‘she doesn’t have cancer, there’s no way it can help her like it helped you’. And they were right to think that. I didn’t know what to do. Kate told me just to bring the shots to her. When you get them, you can’t eat or drink much.”
As he said this, I wondered if that was why I’d been given so little in the cabin.
“The shots make you sick. You throw up for days.” Blake confirmed my suspicions.
“I know. I couldn’t keep anything down either,” I mumbled.
His face fell. “I worried about that when I saw how thin you’d gotten; I wondered if you still felt bad.”
Our eyes met, his aqua blue ones filled with concern. My heart squeezed, and I longed for everything to be like it was again between us.
“I wish you would’ve just told me, Blake. Why all the secrecy? If it wasn’t you, then you had nothing to hide,” I said finally, breaking the tension.
“Sam, you were scared of your own shadow. When I moved here, I wanted nothing more than to talk to you. You can’t honestly tell me you wouldn’t have ran straight to your parents and told them you met a crazy guy in the woods if I had?”
“Well, yeah, I probably would’ve then. But you could’ve done it later.”
“I know, and I’m sorry I didn’t. You mean more to me than anything, and I’ve only wanted to protect you.”
I swallowed. The way his eyes caressed my face, and the softness in his voice, melted the rigid walls within me.
I cleared my throat. “So what happened with Kate?”
He sighed. “I did what she wanted. I gave her the treatment. It was tough not getting caught by the nurses, but it worked. After weeks of visits, she improved. The doctors had no idea why. I was glad she got better and I did care for her as a friend, but it didn’t take long after that to know she wanted more than that. But I couldn’t feel th
at for any girl because I was… already in love with someone else.”
Did he just say he loves me? I shook my head. “But you’d never even met me, Blake. How can you say that? You didn’t even know me then.”
“I did know you, Sam. In some ways, better than you know yourself.”
I stared back at him. The feeling in the car had changed; I wasn’t sure when it had gone from strained friction to anticipation. My racing pulse and flushed face let me know my body refused to believe Blake was a monster. I tried to retrace his words, find some gap in his reasoning. Surely, it can’t all be true can it? My eyes studied his face. He didn’t flinch or look away. He waited for me to speak, to fire the next accusation at him. I tried to clear my jumbled thoughts. Had he covered everything? Something nagged at me, but I couldn’t place it.
He just said he loves me. My heart lurched in my chest and my fingers turned to ice. Whether or not I wanted it, those words stirred something up in me. I broke eye contact; I had a hard time processing things with him firing up all my desires.
“So how did you find out I’d been taken?”
“I’d been camping with Jaxon, on my way to see Tonbo, when I heard about it. I freaked out and raced back, totally thinking he’d finally done what he’d taunted he would.”
“Who are you talking about?”
“Kory.”
“You thought it was Kory?”
“Like I said, he moved back to Durango just to bother me. After he’d convinced me to change Kate and saw I didn’t like her that way, he started teasing me for not having the balls to change you myself. The day he said he’d do it if I wouldn’t, things ended bad between us.”
“What do you mean?”
“I beat the tar out of him, and he ran away with his tail tucked between his legs.”
“That’s why he moved away again? But his family?”
Blake laughed. “Yeah, well, being a dragon has its advantages. Your mind works pretty quickly, and you can arrange for a lot of things to happen. So moving away with his family wasn’t hard for Kory to arrange.”
Hidden Monster (The Monsters Among Us Book 1) Page 14