Mack grimaced.
I swallowed hard. “This sounds too crazy to be true, but it makes too much sense. That’s probably why Jeremy told me he’d catch me with you all the time and get all annoyed. I never understood what he was talking about. He saw us together when I was Sammy.”
“Jeremy.” Mack spat the word out. “Blake’s right, he’s the mother of all douches. Samantha, it didn’t take long for everyone to think you were a bit off at school. I tried to keep the rumors from flying, but you’d pass out in class and then act strange, different. No one knew what to expect. Your parents let the teachers know of your disorder, but they wanted to keep it discreet for you. But that didn’t matter to everyone else.”
Another piece to my puzzle. “So that’s why no one ever wanted to date me? And why only Jen and you were my friends?”
Mack gave me a sad smile. “Yeah. By the time we’d hit high school, guys thought you were totally hot, but steered clear. Until Jeremy. He pretty much told everyone he didn’t care if you had an IQ of ten, you were good looking, and that’s all that mattered to him.”
“Ugh. He just wanted to make out with me?”
“Pretty much. Blake and I wanted to deck him on more than one occasion. You see, I had fallen for Sammy while Blake was in love with Samantha.”
I gaped at him. Shocking as it was, another piece fell into place. “Did Blake know about Sammy and how you felt about me… or her?” I asked at last.
“No, he didn’t. I couldn’t admit to him that I’d fallen for the girl he loved most of all, even if it was just one side of her. When Sammy realized how I felt about her, she pressured me to find a way to free her.” His face saddened. “What started out as her trying to save you, changed. She felt she was stronger then you, so she could take better care of you. Keep you safe. She said she loved you more than anything… and that was why she had to find a way to be the dominant personality.”
“What do you mean? Seems like she just comes whenever the heck she wants. I’m always passing out, waking up somewhere new.” I gasped, realizing what my words meant. “That’s what happened in Tonbo’s theater, isn’t it?”
Mack nodded slowly. “Yeah, I think she took over, flew back home. To do what, I’m not sure really. We were hunting, well, Jaxon. Truth is, Sammy wasn’t always honest with me.” He grimaced. “But I’m getting ahead of myself. I need to tell you how it all happened.”
I nodded, not really looking forward to the bit about the cabin. I just couldn’t stomach that Mack had purposely tried to terrorize me.
“Sammy was smart, like I said, and determined to find a way to heal herself. She was convinced that if she could fix her broken pieces, she would be the one left in control. You see, she can only emerge from time to time. Most of the times are when you’re nervous, afraid, and almost always when you’re in danger. She’d get so mad at you for mountain biking. She’d curse at how she’d find herself suddenly plummeting precariously down some slick cliff. She’d get you out of the scrape and then march to my house to use my computer.” Mack glanced at me. “Or to do other things.”
I felt my face heat. Was that why Mack’s lips felt familiar and welcoming to me?
“Other things?” I repeated.
“Yeah, well, we liked each other. Sammy told me she loved me. She wanted us to be together. I’d never had anyone like that before. It happened one time when we were kissing. I lost control and—” I almost gasped at what he might be implicating, but he finished with, “I transformed into a dragon right before her.”
“Oh,” I said, relieved beyond measure that that was it.
“I knew I’d messed up. And she wouldn’t stop with the questions until I’d pretty much spilled the beans. Once I’d told her all about the Dragon Fae world, and Blake, she figured out that he was who had saved her that day in the water. She immediately wanted to know if the serum would work for her. Make it so she’d be herself permanently, never to disappear again.”
Now I was beginning to understand why Mack had said it was Sammy’s plan.
“So in other words, Sammy wanted me to disappear forever,” I said.
Mack frowned. “Yeah, and that’s why I told her no. As much as I loved her and wanted to be with her, I cared for you as my friend. I never wanted to hurt you, Samantha. You have to believe me.”
“So what happened then? Why’d you end up doing it anyway?”
“Love makes you foolish and blind, I’m ashamed to say. Sammy started researching more and more into the science behind it all. Reading all about Alois Oldrich.”
“Who’s that?” I asked.
“That’s Tonbo’s real name. His Czech name before he changed it to Tonbo.”
“Oh. So she still wanted to change herself… err… me?”
“Yeah. She became obsessed with meeting Tonbo. She begged me to at least take her to the island so she could see it. I don’t know why I caved. She could be so persuasive. As much as I loved her, looking back, I can see how stupid I was. So I agreed. Found a time that Blake would be with Jaxon hunting, and I brought her to the island.”
“Where did my parents think I’d gone?”
“I told them I wanted to take you with my family on vacation. At that point, your mom needed a break from well… you. Sammy made sure of that. And your parents knew that I knew, and Sammy would listen to me most of the time. So they agreed and we went ‘with my parents to California.’”
“We didn’t really though, huh?” I said.
“No way, but your parents trusted me. And my folks, they don’t care when I head over to the island. They’ve long accepted that’s a part of who I am.”
“When did we go?” I asked.
“About four months ago, during summer break. I took you there. Showed you the island, even went into Tonbo’s office.”
“Ah… the tiles in the foyer. They were so familiar!” I gasped. “And so were Tonbo’s gardens.” I glanced at Mack. “And so was Kate.”
He nodded. “Yeah, I introduced you to Kate. All the while, you remained Sammy. I was scared to death any moment you’d change back to Samantha. It was risky, idiotic, and I can’t believe it worked. We stayed only one day. We left that night.”
“But I would have looked like myself... and if I met Tonbo, why didn’t he say anything when I went with you guys again?”
“Kate told me which days Tonbo would be visiting the outskirts. He likes to make sure the ancients are okay. So we went on a day he was gone. Kate made sure of it. I just couldn’t risk him seeing you. He would’ve told Blake. He loves Blake.” There was no envy in his statement about Tonbo loving Blake. If anything, I almost felt like Mack felt the same way about him. “We did try to disguise you a bit. You wore a brown wig and big sun glasses.”
“Well that explains why I felt like I was having déjà vu the whole time I was there. So then what happened?”
“Well, Sammy and Kate started talking. At that point, all I just thought was that the visit went great and the two of you had hit it off as friends. We headed home with me sweating bullets the whole way. After a few weeks of being home, I finally breathed a sigh of relief. No harm, no foul. Sammy even backed off from begging me to change her.”
I stared at him. “I have a hunch that Sammy and Kate weren’t just discussing their favorite bands.”
“No, they weren’t,” he said, running his hand through his hair.
Chapter 43
He began pacing and then glanced at me, stopping abruptly. “Sorry,” he said, I guess realizing what that reminded me of. He seemed to hesitate, like he didn’t want to tell me the rest.
“So then what, Mack?” I probed.
He sighed. “Well, then Sammy showed me that picture.”
I glanced down, realizing I was still holding the photo of the girl I still was. In all my shock over Mack being my monster in the cabin, I’d forgotten to change back.
“She told me that if she could ever find a way to be herself, she was going to look like her,” he s
aid. Then he pointed at me, “Like you.”
“So that’s how you knew it was me in the caves? And why you thought when you came in today that I was really Sammy? And you kissed me? Because I looked like her?”
“Yeah. I thought she’d done it. But let me explain the rest. As much as I don’t want to tell you what I did, I have to. I tried to ignore the fact that Sammy seemed like she had plans. I wasn’t going to give her the serum and I knew Blake would never… so I figured you were safe. Then a few days before you were abducted, Blake discovered Sammy’s existence. We’d been so careful. I knew I should’ve told Blake from the start, but I loved Sammy. And she begged me not to tell him. Why, I’m not really sure. Well, Blake came when I wasn’t expecting him. He’d been camping with Jaxon. Anyway, when he saw you as Sammy, he knew something wasn’t right.”
Mack clasped his hands together. “He always knew you struggled. He knew about the therapy. He knew you didn’t fit in socially, but he only ever saw Samantha. And he’d tell me how much it hurt him to see you that way. I suggested once he changed you, that maybe you’d be happier, and he went crazy on me. He said you deserved to have kids, a family.”
There was that question again, the one I’d never dared to ask. “Can’t damsels and dragons have kids?”
Mack shook his head slowly. “It hasn’t turned out too pretty when they’ve tried. So Tonbo banned it.”
I tried to swallow the sobering news down. No wonder Blake was adamant about not changing me.
“Oh, I see,” I said simply, when, really, my heart had broken. But what about the young dragons and damsels I’d seen at the island? I guess they must’ve been changed just like Blake and Kory were. Or maybe as babies like Mack. No kids? I couldn’t think about that right now. Later, not now.
“I tried to explain to Blake that Sammy was a part of Samantha. He was pretty upset I didn’t tell him sooner. I sort of downplayed how long Sammy had been around. Anyway, he left and went back to Jaxon.”
“Jaxon said he’d thought Blake had done it because right before I was discovered missing, Blake had left for a bit and came back upset. Guess I know why now.”
“Yeah, well, let’s just say when you disappeared, it shocked Blake and me both. I knew you’d gone jogging that morning, like you always did. I thought nothing of it until your mom called me around ten, asking me if you’d come over to my house. That’s when I feared what had happened. I rushed to where Blake and Jaxon were, determined to tell him everything. But when I saw the rage he had for Kory, I chickened out. I couldn’t tell him until I was sure it was Kate. Honestly, I was afraid of what he’d do to her. So we began searching. I did contact Kate, but she denied everything at the beginning.”
“So Kate did it? But I know you were there… your pacing…”
“Let me explain. Blake and I searched nonstop for two weeks. I told him I had to keep up appearances in Durango, check in with your parents and stuff. So we parted ways. Blake kept looking for you. When I got back to my room that night, Kate was there.”
Mack’s face paled. “I almost killed her myself at that point, before I let her speak. She told me it how unfair it was that Sammy and I couldn’t be together. We loved each other and deserved to be happy. Kate went on and on, asking why it was up to Blake anyway? Why was he the one who got to choose? He never planned to change Samantha so he could be with her, or even planned to meet her in person. She felt Sammy and I should have a chance at love. Kate told me Sammy begged her to help, and she felt for her. Honestly, I wonder how much of it was because Blake never wanted Kate. Either way, they were the ones to orchestrate the break-in. Sammy’s mad computer skills made it easy for her to override the system. Kate got the serum, and they altered it together. In all her reading, Sammy had done a lot of research on genes. She’d found DNA that would make it so she could be Sammy, look like herself, not Samantha, and would never fear water again.”
“So that’s why I can hold my breath… the whale DNA. What makes me change like this? I didn’t think it was possible?”
“Kate told me Sammy read about the Mimic Octopus. It can change its shape, form, and even mimic other sea creatures to protect itself. Think about what you’ve done. You changed into this girl to trick Jaxon. And then you used your instinct to change into Jaxon’s son to protect us all.”
Everything worked, except the part where Mack fit in. I met his eyes. “So is that when you agreed to help them?”
Mack groaned. “Samantha, I’m sorry. I didn’t know what to do. Kate said that Sammy had come up with the idea of attacking Samantha, tying her up, and making her scared. She was convinced that Samantha had to experience terror the entire time she was injected. It was the only way Sammy felt sure she’d be the one there.”
He grunted. “But Kate said it wasn’t working exactly as planned. Every time Kate went to inject you, it was you, not Sammy. Kate kept waiting for Sammy to emerge so they could finish the process, ditch the theatrics.”
I waited when his words faded.
“Kate told me she needed my help. She was scared if we didn’t finish this that maybe neither Samantha nor Sammy would prevail. You never know how the dragonfly DNA will affect someone. Kate told me I needed to be the one to force Sammy to come out, since Sammy listened to me most of the time. Kate said Sammy told her she wanted me to be the one to give her, or you, the last injection.”
“So you were the one, that last time? Now it makes sense. The way you jumped at me… you did it to scare me. But you were different. You gave me water when I asked for it and you didn’t shove it into my teeth, like before. You were gentler.”
Mack’s expression twisted up. “I’m such a monster! I should’ve untied you right then and there! I wanted to! It horrified me to see you like that!” He collapsed to his knees and covered his face with his hands. Through his fingers, I heard a muffled, “I’m so sorry.”
“Just tell me the rest,” I said softly.
He lowered his fingers. “As much as I wanted to end your hell, I knew Kate was right. So I finished it, made horrible promises, and tried to make you think I was Jeremy. I gave you your last injection and told you it was special. I hoped my words would trigger Sammy to come out, but they didn’t. I went home sick to my stomach at what I’d done. I decided I didn’t care what happened; I was going back the next day to let you go and tell you everything. But when I returned, you were gone. I didn’t know then that Jaxon had freed you; I didn’t even know about Jaxon being a bug. So I searched for you and caught up with you about the same time the rescue party did.”
His eyebrows bent low, he frowned. “I came to see you the first night you were home from the hospital. I snuck into your room in my camo. When I saw you… I knew we’d destroyed you. You were no longer Sammy or Samantha. It was so hard to come back and visit you. I could hardly bear to see what I’d done to you.” His voice cracked, and tears welled in his eyes.
He remained on his knees; we gazed at each other in silence. I was sure he waited for me to say hateful words. As much as I wanted to be furious for what he’d done and especially what he’d kept from me for so long, I couldn’t muster any words. Instead, I watched his tears fall silently from his face, taking with them pieces of my heart. Whether it was Sammy or just me, I didn’t know or care. I had feelings for Mack and, on some level, I loved him.
I cleared my throat. “Don’t feel bad anymore, okay? You should’ve told me about Sammy, but so should have my parents. I can’t be mad at you for listening to Sammy. You were in love. I understand. If anyone’s to blame for all this, it’s me. I’m my own monster.”
Chapter 44
Mack tried to disagree with me, but I methodically picked up the clothes he’d brought, entered the bathroom, transformed back into myself, and got dressed. Once my hair was brushed, I came back out. I felt wooden in my actions. I wasn’t sure if it was calmness or numbness taking over.
“Can you take me home? I need to talk to my parents.”
Mack hopped to his
feet and nodded. He didn’t say anything while we rode in his jeep. And, at the moment, I had no more words for him. He’d told me everything. I was left to sway between being completely livid for what he’d done to feeling sorry for him. I opted for staying numb, rather than opening myself up to feelings and emotions.
The one thing I could focus on was that my parents hadn’t told me the truth either. As much as I wanted to refuse to believe I had an alternate personality, I needed to confront them. I needed to know if I’d really had Sammy in me. And I knew Mack seem to think she was gone for good. But is she? Didn’t she fly back to Colorado? Didn’t she throw me into the arms of a crazy, psychotic killer?
We entered the house to discover my dad at was at work, but my mom was home.
The moment she saw me, she gushed about how worried she’d been and how glad she was that I was okay now. I tried to mumble some sort of answer. Mack began backing out the door, and I turned.
“No, stay, Mack. Please,” I said.
Mack stepped back to my side. “Anything you want,” he said quietly.
My mom glanced around. “Where’s Blake? Thought you’d be coming back with him.”
“Mom, I know about Sammy,” I answered instead, too tired to make up a story. No more lies… or being lied to.
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