by Lee Wardlow
Lacey was holding Caz’s hand. She looked over her shoulder at me. Her tone was quiet when she said, “She’s talking about when I left and went to stay with Eddie and Ricky?”
I nodded.
Lacey turned back to Caz. “I hurt you,” she stated.
“I was afraid you would never come back, like Mom and Dad, Lace.” She was picking at things with her free hand. “She just disappeared. Didn’t tell me where she was.” Caz was no longer talking to Lacey but to herself. “I was heartbroken. She left me like they all did.”
“Oh Caz, I’m so sorry. We were angry at each other. I was mad at Brodie for cutting me out of his life. I was scared because I was pregnant. I ran without thinking what it would do to you.”
“I was afraid that Lacey wouldn’t come back, and Eddie lied to me. He blamed me for running Lacey off.”
Lacey looked over at me then at Brodie. “He was teasing her. She must not have realized it because when we were little, I used to get so mad at her constantly bossing me around. He would always say, Caz, what did you do to her this time knowing full well it was me that was at fault. It used to make her so mad. He did it just to rile her. Then he would laugh and tickle her until she finally gave in and laughed too but she wouldn’t know that over the phone.”
I just listened. What could I say? Caz had been keeping this buried inside her not talking to anyone while she was hurting.
“I’ll call Eddie,” she told Brodie. “You stay with Caz and Davy,” she told Brodie.
Lacey was upset. We both knew it when she left the room. I looked at Brodie and suggested maybe he go with her. He shook his head no. “She wants to talk to Eddie.” He looked at the door where Lacey had walked out. “I know her well enough to know that she needs him right now more than me.”
“I’m sorry, Brodie. Caz doesn’t know what she’s saying.”
He nodded his head. “No need to be sorry. I hurt Lacey. Lacey hurt Caz. Nobody knew what Caz was feeling. This goes deeper than just Lacey leaving before your wedding. This goes back to their childhood and not feeling like anyone, but Eddie cared about them.
“Their dad was in and out after he left. He came to visit when it suited him. Prior to leaving, he was abusive to their mother. It was only when he thought he was going to lose her that he tried to make amends for all the cheating, drinking and running around on her that he did but it was too late then. She was dying from her injuries.”
We sat down. Me close to Caz so I could hold her hand. Her eyes opened and closed as soon as she saw that I was still there.
“What does this do to your wedding plans?” Brodie asked.
“I told her I would carry her to Shawn Lane, if necessary. We’re still getting married in three weeks.”
He chuckled at my response.
“Dad sent over a letter from Grandpa and told me about my trust. I had him invest it in another trust for mine and Caz’s children.”
“That’s nice, Davy.” He nodded as if he was contemplating what I had said. “I have my letter too. It was really, nice what Gramps wrote to each of us. I did the same with my money. Fin, Coll and Hugh did the same with theirs.”
“Are you sorry that you didn’t keep the ring for Lacey?”
He shook his head no. “At the time, it just seemed right for Finlay to give Grandma’s ring to Machara. I never expected her to not make it.”
“Me neither.”
“It’s where it should be, in Fin’s care. Whichever of the girls gets married first, they should be offered it. If they don’t want it then there are a lot of girls in this family. I hope one of them does want it.”
I watched Caz resting for the moment. I gazed at her wishing now that I hadn’t gotten in the tub with her. Then maybe this wouldn’t have happened, but I had made her happy for a few moments.
“I have to ask.”
I turned to my brother sensing what he wanted to know. “I was in the tub with Caz. I went to get towels for us when she slipped on the water she had sloshed over the side.”
“That is simply amazing.” My brother was shaking his head in awe.
“What?”
“She has affected you,” Brodie declared.
I nodded. Caz made me want to do things that even though I was uncomfortable they made her happy, so I did them; like bubble baths. Dominate her? No problem. Bubble baths, awkward just plain awkward for someone like me.
“Did you take your glasses off?” He asked me.
I shot him a dark look which only made him laugh at me. “Shut up, Brodie.”
Brodie’s phone was vibrating in his pocket. I watched him take it out. He glanced up at me. “I texted Dad and Lorna to let them know where we were going. They’re here. I’ll go meet them and bring them back to you.”
“Thanks, Brodie.”
“That’s what we do, Davy. I know it’s hard on you not having Ewan. That’s who you were talking to when Lacey and I arrived, isn’t it?”
“Yeah, it was.”
He patted my shoulder. I didn’t need to tell him anything else. They all understood my connection with Ewan. “I’ll be right back.”
I leaned on the railing of Caz’s bed. I caressed her head. “I love how you sleep too, Caz. So, peaceful. So, beautiful. I watch you sometimes wondering how I got so lucky.” She didn’t stir. I didn’t want to wake her, but I kept whispering to her softly. Telling her how I felt about her.
“I know you don’t always feel self-confident but then neither do I. That is why we are perfect for each other.” She moved a little and grimaced. That tiny movement had caused her pain. I soothed her with soft words and my fingers on her forehead. She settled quickly.
“You always realize when I’m not sure what to do or I’m lacking the confidence that I need, and you push me with just the right words. That is why I love you.”
“I love you, too,” Caz mumbled in her sleep.
I rose from the chair and leaned over so I could press my lips to hers. Then I sat down again and just held her hand, waiting for everyone to come back.
I liked the quiet. I wasn’t like Fin or Brodie who had to have TV on when they were alone. Hugh always had music blaring in the background if he was by himself.
Coll and I were the quiet ones. We could live with ourselves, no noise just the thoughts running through our heads. Ewan and Gray didn’t like to be alone period. It didn’t matter if there was background noise they had to have somebody with them which is probably why Ewan had Leo at his apartment so much when Greer was in rehab.
Did it make a difference to his and Greer’s relationship and how it turned out? I wasn’t sure, but it was what it was, and I thought it turned out the way it should be.
Greer was married to Fin. They had Cheyanne now and she was the mother his twins needed since Mac didn’t make it. Mac wanted it that way herself. She had left enough video evidence stating that.
The door opened, and Brodie let Lorna come in first. I met her halfway across the room. Her arms came around me, providing that motherly comfort that I needed but she had always been there for me, for us when our own mother had failed us too many times.
“How is she, honey?”
“She’s okay. They’re going to do surgery to repair the compound fracture in her femur when the orthopedic surgeon gets here.”
“That must have been quite a fall.” Lorna glanced between me and Caz.
“Her right leg was hanging awkwardly off the side of the tub caught her foot in the gold handle, I think. The force of her body falling one way and her leg staying the other caused the femur to snap. It was bad getting her moved to the ambulance.”
“She’ll be okay for the wedding, right?” Lorna looked at Caz. She knew what a tough decision it was to postpone the wedding when Lacey disappeared. Caz didn’t want to go through it without Lacey by her side, but she didn’t want to postpone our wedding either. “Well not okay but we won’t have to postpone again?”
I laughed. “I told her no postponing. I’ll carry h
er if I have to.”
“Just let us know whatever we can do,” Lorna told me.
“Where are you going to put her?” Dad asked. “You don’t have any first, floor bedrooms. I would imagine she’s going to have a cast that is hip to toe.”
“I might need help with that.” I looked between them. “Where do you think a good place to put a hospital bed would be?” Lorna looked at Dad. “That won’t make her crazy,” I added.
Dad chuckled. “How about we take the dining room table out to the garage for now? I’ll get a bed delivered and setup in there.”
“Lorna, she just bought some new linens could we put those on the hospital bed? I realize the sheets won’t work but the blanket and comforter.”
“Sure, I’ll take care of that for you. How about we put some comfortable chairs in there with the bed so you and anyone coming to visit can keep her company?”
“That would be nice,” I replied.
“We’ll get started on those things. Anything else?” Dad asked.
“I don’t think so.”
Lorna stepped away and went to Caz’s bedside. I watched her lean over and kiss Caz’s forehead. Her eyelids fluttered open. “Lorna,” she whispered. Her eyes could barely stay open because the drugs were making her sleepy.
“Hi Caz. We just came by to check on you and see if there was anything we can do to help you and Davy with,” she told her.
“So, sweet.” She moved again and whimpered. “Thank you.”
“You rest, honey. We’ll see you soon.”
Caz nodded.
I followed Dad, Lorna and Brodie to the hall. Her doctor approached. “The orthopedic specialist looked at Caz’s x-rays. He’s ready to take her to surgery. I just need next of kin to sign the forms. In a few days, we’ll have her on crutches then she can go home.”
“As her fiancé do I count as next of kin?”
“Does she have any living relatives, other than you?” He asked.
Brodie and I both looked down the hall where Lacey was walking towards us. “Her sister, Lacey and her uncle but he lives out of town.”
“Lacey will have to sign them as next of kin. I’ll have the administration staff bring them to the room she’s in right now then we’ll get her ready for surgery.”
“Thanks.”
We both were looking at Lacey. We could see she was already upset. “What’s wrong?”
“You have to sign the release forms for Caz’s surgery to be performed.”
“Great.”
We went to the room where Caz was still resting. An administrator came in with a laptop on wheels. She explained all the risks to Lacey and me. I put my arm around her when she started to cry.
It was scary listening to the risks of any surgery right before someone asks you to sign a document that says your loved one could die in surgery. It doesn’t happen often, but Brodie and I knew it could and did happen. Mac had died in the recovery room.
After Lacey signed for Caz’s surgery. We waited for them to prep her. Then we both kissed her before they took her away from us. A nurse showed us where we could wait during Caz’s surgery.
A half hour later, Coll arrived. “Sorry, I’m late. I helped Freya get the girls down.”
My brother took a seat by Brodie. They exchanged glances then Lacey took my hand. “It will be all right,” she said. I nodded.
Fifteen minutes after Coll arrived, Finlay came to the waiting room. I leaned over on my knees, letting Lacey’s hand drop to the side. She patted my back knowing that I was becoming emotional. Fin sat beside me. “We’re going to be here until she’s out of surgery,” he told me.
Gray arrived with Hugh. They both gripped my shoulder before sitting down beside Finlay. My brothers were waiting with me until Caz was out of surgery.
I could barely hold back all the emotions. Without Ewan, I still had five other brothers who loved me as much as he did.
Not one of them were going to leave my side until my girl was out of surgery.
Chapter 8
Lacey had nodded off. Her head was resting against Brodie’s shoulder. It had been two hours. Soon, I hoped that we would hear something. I walked out in the hall to grab a cup of coffee from a vending machine when Eddie called me.
“Hey Eddie.”
“I’ve been going out of my mind. Lacey was supposed to call me, and she isn’t answering her phone.”
“I’m sorry. She nodded off and probably didn’t hear it or maybe her phone died because honestly none of us heard it,” I explained. “Caz is still in surgery. I picked up my cup and headed toward the electronic board where the status of the patients was posted. “She should be in recovery soon.”
“This is why, I didn’t want to come down here,” he said softly. I heard Ricky his partner in the background trying to console him. “I’m too far away.”
I didn’t know what to say to him, so I kept quiet.
“Lacey told me what Caz has been thinking. She’s always been the one to be dramatic. Thinking things were one way…if she would just talk about her feelings instead of keeping them bottled up,” he said.
I wanted to be angry at him for assuming that Caz was just being dramatic but really, today wasn’t the day for that. She bottled them up for a reason. She thought she had to her entire life.
“I love that girl.” His voice broke. He handed Ricky the phone.
“Hey, Davy will you call us when she’s out of surgery?” He asked me.
“I will,” I promised.
“Tell her that we both love her. Eddie’s going to be on a plane to Ohio on Friday. I’ll be there prior to the wedding as planned. I’m guessing there is still going to be a wedding.”
“You bet your ass there is going to be a wedding,” I informed Ricky.
He chuckled. “Good. You two have waited long enough. Call us when she’s out of surgery.”
We hung up and I headed back to the place where my family was sitting. Ewan had texted me wondering how Caz was.
In surgery. Our brothers are sitting with me.
I’m there in spirit, brother.
I know you are.
Let me know when she’s out of surgery.
I will Ewan.
A half hour later, the surgeon came to the waiting area and took Lacey and me to a conference room to talk about Caz. My brothers remained behind.
She had come through the surgery just fine. That was the only thing I think that I heard. I knew he was talking about her recovery and therapy, but I just wanted to see her.
We went to my brothers and told them what he explained then we went to recovery to see Caz. She was more out of it than in her room, but we could see her. Touch her and knew that she was all right.
I stayed with Caz while Lacey went to the waiting room. She wanted to call Eddie and Ricky and let them know that her sister was out of surgery.
My brothers went home when I came out of recovery because the time was getting late. They were moving Caz to a room in a little while. I was staying the night with her. Lacey and Brodie were coming up to her room to be sure she was settled but then they too were going home.
When Caz was moved I went to say goodbye to my brothers. I hugged each of them and told them that I loved them. We didn’t do that often enough. It seemed like in times of tragedy or concern we used those words. When Brodie was shot, and we wondered if he would make it. We said, I love you.
Was it because we just didn’t express our emotions well? Maybe it was because our mother was emotionally stunted and therefore we had become just like her. Maybe it was just because we were men. Men weren’t like women who could relate to their emotions so much easier than we could. At some point, maybe we just needed to stop blaming Fiona for all our troubles.
Lacey told me she would call me in the morning to see how Caz was doing. I promised to call her if anything happened in the night.
I settled in a chair that reclined. I was near Caz’s bed. The broken leg propped up and casted just like my father
thought. Toe to thigh. I might very well be carrying her down the aisle but that would be okay if this time we became man and wife.
Nodding off in this chair was easier than I thought it would be. It was padded so it was soft and cushy. It leaned back to a comfortable level, so I could relax.
In the middle of the night, I heard the nurse talking with Caz and sat up quickly. “She’s just a little uncomfortable,” she told me glancing across the bed at me.
I got up and leaned on the railing. Caz was more than a little uncomfortable. “Why didn’t you wake me?”
“I didn’t want to bother you.” I caressed her cheek. “They’re getting my pain medicine, right now.”
Holding her hand, I stayed by her side until they gave her the pain meds that she needed. Then I settled back in the chair and held her hand. She talked for a while.
“I seem to remember Lacey was here.”
“She was.”
“I hate this dopey feeling like I can, but I can’t remember what I said to her.”
“You told her how upset you were about her leaving you without a word.”
“Oh no.”
I didn’t think it was such a bad idea that it had come out but maybe not while Caz was high on pain meds and couldn’t remember anything.
“Eddie is coming here Friday. Ricky will follow the week before the wedding.”
She turned her head towards me. I could see the meds were taking affect because her eyelids were getting droopy. “Why is Eddie coming Friday?”
“He’s worried about you.”
I didn’t know what else to tell her. I was sure she didn’t remember telling Lacey all the things that she had prior to her surgery. I was sure that Lacey and Eddie would want to talk to her about it eventually. Now wasn’t the time to remind her about it.
She rubbed her thumb across my hand soothing herself. It was something she always did when she was troubled. I leaned over and caressed her forehead with my free hand. “Are you okay?”
She nodded. “Thank you for staying,” she told me.
“Where else would I be?” I asked her.
“My dress is going to look beautiful with my new accessory,” she teased me.
I chuckled at her. “Yeah, well it will just be something to remember when we look at our wedding pictures. Right?”