“Are we going to wear my little pony pyjamas and have pillow fights and midnight feasts like when we were ten?” I asked sarcastically.
“I’ll take a ticket for the pillow fight!” Nate quipped and I narrowed my eyes at him. Not helpful!
“No, it’s going to be a sophisticated affair. Since we can’t go out and get busy on the dance floor, we’ll bring the party to us.” Dana didn’t bite.
“Right, so we’re going to get dressed up in little black dresses and heels, hang a disco ball in your living room and dance around our handbags?” I said, to laughter from the men.
“You don’t do that on and actual night out Callie!” Sally accused, pointing a finger at me. “You shoot tequila with the hot barman all night!”
“That was one time!” I defended myself, hiding a smirk behind the Guinness that Adam and I were now sharing and remembering one of the last nights out we’d had with Amy. I’d had a rough day and argued with Jase. So when the good looking bar tender had shown me some attention I’d lapped it up. Shallow I know, but it had given me a boost and made me feel better for a couple of hours. The sad fact was, he’d recognised me from the pub and we were talking shop mostly. Adam raised his eyebrows at me and I looked away quickly.
“Anyway, we’re going to paint each other’s nails and colour each other’s hair and share secrets and sing and laugh and drink cocktails and eat chocolate and dance and cry.” Dana announced, flicking her hair. Just as I thought, my own personal dimension of hell.
“Sounds mind numbingly perfect!” I rolled my eyes again and Adam chuckled and squeezed my shoulder again. Dana knew I didn’t mean it. I just wasn’t as girly as her, not that it ever stopped her from trying to convert me at every opportunity.
Adam grabbed my hand later as we were leaving and locked our fingers together. He walked me backwards when I turned to face him, until my back was against the wall outside the pub and his body was flush against mine. “Come back and have coffee with me. I didn’t think I’d get to see you tonight and I’m not ready to say goodbye yet.”
“It’s late Adam. I’ve got an early start and a really long day tomorrow. I don’t think I need caffeine.” I had an early business management class, a stock take to do at the bar and an evening shift the next day.
“Hot chocolate then.” He bargained “And it’s me that’s picking you up for your early class remember? I’ve got brandy...”
“You don’t play fair Mr Butler.” I caved, mentally slapping myself on the wrist for being so easy. Who was I kidding? I wanted to be with him. I wanted to be with him every second of the day. Maybe my feelings for him were bigger than I dared admit to myself. Damn Mick and his voice of reason.
Adam assured Cam that he wouldn’t let me out of his sight and we walked with Greg and a very chattery Dana towards their place. Adam refused to let go of my hand, despite my wriggling and attempts to put space in between us. Quite why I was still fighting it I didn’t know, but I was, maybe it had become a habit.
“You guys coming in for a night cap?” Greg offered when we reached their door.
“No.” Adam answered bluntly, without looking at them, and led me straight past them to his own door. Dana giggled and I called goodnight to them over my shoulder as I was practically dragged up the stairs to his loft apartment.
“That was rude, with Greg and Dana.” I scolded him half heartedly as I sat on his sofa a while later.
“I don’t feel like sharing you anymore tonight.” He set a cup of hot chocolate and the brandy bottle between us on the coffee table.
“If we keep this up we’ll have to buy bigger cups.” I laughed and topped the cup off with the brandy. Mick had dropped off everything Adam needed from the pub, but we were still sharing.
“Or you’ll have to stay longer so we can share more than one drink.” He smirked.
“Ulterior motives?” I mocked.
“Always, where you’re concerned Angel.” He put an arm around me and pulled me into his side.
“You looking to be my pillow again Butler?” I narrowed my eyes at him.
“Ah, you saw right through my cunning plan Wilson!” He laughed.
“Why am I here Adam?” I asked, pulling away from him, suddenly serious.
“Because we enjoy spending time together.” He said simply.
“Is that all?” I asked.
“For now, yes.” He replied.
“For now...” I mused.
“I thought we talked about this. I told you where I stand Angel. Nothing has changed for me.” He looked me in the eye.
“And if I don’t feel the same way?” I challenged.
“You wouldn’t be here.” He smiled confidently.
I raised my eyebrows at him, “You’re very sure of yourself aren’t you?”
“I’m sure of my feelings for you.” He said, running the tips of his fingers along my cheek. “You’re under no pressure Angel.”
“This isn’t pressure?” I asked, grasping at straws for a valid argument. It wasn’t pressure, he had never put any pressure on me and I knew he wouldn’t.
“No. This is us spending time together, getting to know each other. Don’t you enjoy my company?” He asked, feigning hurt.
“Of course I do. You know that.” I told him.
“Then relax. Stop questioning it. Stop looking for a label. We’re good together Angel and things will progress for us when you’re ready. I won’t push, but I won’t pretend I don’t have feelings for you either. I intend to remind you every day that you mean the world to me.” He put his fingers under my chin and raised it until our eyes met then leaned in to kiss me on the forehead.
“No labels. No questioning.” I thought aloud, deciding to ignore the last part of his declaration. I could do that. Couldn’t I? It had to be better than what I was doing now.
“No more oh shit moments and running away from me.” He suggested and we both laughed, “Just us. Walls down. Fighting the darkness together.”
“Just us.” I agreed and suddenly felt a weight lift from my shoulders. As soon as I’d decided to stop worrying about it, it felt right and as though things had finally fallen into place. And I wondered what I had been running from in the first place when it came to Adam.
When I woke the next morning, well rested, and sprawled across Adam’s chest there was no panic and rush to move. Just an over whelming sense of contentment. I was actually aware of how good it felt to wake up in his arms, rather than bursting head long into an “oh shit” moment.
Of course, I wasn’t amused at having to get up stupidly early so we’d have time to go back to my place to shower and change before college. Adam had offered me the use of his shower, but with no clean clothes to change into I’d opted to come home. He hadn’t missed the opportunity to inform me, with a huge grin on his face, there was always room in his wardrobe for some of my things if I wanted it. Sometimes I think he said these things to deliberately terrify me for his own amusement.
Twin 2: You’d better have stayed at Adam’s.
Me: What if I didn’t?
Twin 2: Don’t make me lock you in the cells Cal.
Me: Relax. Of course I was with Adam. I’m sorry you were worried.
Twin 2: Just text in future before you fall asleep on him.
Me: Who says I fell asleep on him?
Twin 2: It’s Adam. That’s what you do with him. He makes your nightmares stop. I’m thinking of asking him to move in. ;)
Me: Haha! Love you idiot.
Twin 2: Love you more shit head.
“I despise mornings!” I grumbled, as I dragged a comb through my wet hair and threw my phone on the table. Cam was already at work when we got to the house.
“I know.” he smiled at me over our shared cup of tea.
“You’ll come to hate me in the mornings.” I told him, “Everyone does.”
“Or I’ll find a way of waking you up that ensures you won’t be grumpy. Evidently waking in my arms isn’t enough, but at least you d
idn’t run. That’s progress right there Angel.” He teased.
“One of these days we’ll actually sleep in a bed, that will be progress.” I grumbled. He rose from the stool he was sitting on and moved around the kitchen to where I was standing. He snaked his arms around my waist from behind and pulled me against him.
“When I finally get you in a bed Angel, we will not be sleeping.” He whispered into my hair and it was a good job he was holding onto me because I’m pretty sure I lost the use of my legs. “I know you have a crazy day today but I want us to spend some time together.”
“We’ll see each other loads today, you’ve got Callie sitting duty remember?” I reminded him, pulling myself together.
“I’m talking about real time. A few minutes here and there in between work and college isn’t that. Spend the day with me tomorrow?” He asked.
“Alright.” I smiled.
“What, no arguments? Excuses? Running at speed in the opposite direction?” He teased.
“I think...no, I know, I’m done with the running Adam.” I twisted in his arms and looked up at him, resting my hands on his chest, “I’m not saying that I’m ready to move this, whatever this is, on any further, but I’m not going to run away from you anymore. I realise now, I was being ridiculous when I was running from the one person I’ve never had to hide from. The person who saw me and my darkness right from the start and never once expected me to pretend it was any better than it was. You didn’t try to fix me, but instead vowed to fight alongside me so that I can fix myself. You accepted my darkness, didn’t judge and weren’t afraid of it, you matched it with your own. That’s something I should never have run from and I won’t be doing it anymore.”
“Angel” He smiled, “You never have to hide from me and I will never hide from you. All those things you claim I’ve done for you, you’ve done for me in return. When I’m with you, it’s the only time I feel like I can finally breathe again. You wear your darkness like a badge of honour, it strengthens you and you’ve taught me how to do the same. You saw it in me from the second our eyes met and you acknowledged it, not verbally, but in the look you gave me in that split second, you accepted me and my darkness. You give me the courage to fight it because you’re right there with me to do it. I haven’t given you all of it yet, but I will. It’s yours when you want it. Just as yours is mine.”
His phone rang, ruining our moment completely.
“Well, that ruined the mood.” I said with a smile.
He laughed and pulled me in for a hug, but ignored his phone. “We should go.”
“Ugh!” I groaned.
“Well, at least you’re not about to go into work with a bunch of men while visions of you, under me, in my bed float around my head.” He reminded me of our earlier conversation as he buried his face in my hair. And there went my legs again.
*****
Adam: Music? Music is always a good start to the day.
Me: Silence is golden.
*****
They’re passing her around like a joint. She goes nowhere alone anymore. I’m going to have to put more thought into getting her to join me. I’d prefer it if she came willingly, as was my original plan, but I’m no longer certain she would. These ridiculous men have made her paranoid, she has no reason to fear me, I will take extra special care of her this time.
The pretty cook from the pub occupied me for a while, but like all the others in the end, she refused to continue her learning long enough to meet my expectations. She grew accustomed to the pain eventually, the screaming stopped and I tired of her then. She has merely been a distraction; she was, conveniently for me, in the wrong place at the right time. I hadn’t specifically planned on her, but as it turned out she has been the perfect addition to my plans.
*****
Chapter Eleven
Kat’s body had been found. She had sustained many of the same knife injuries as the others, she had also been killed in the same way (her throat slit and left to bleed to death), a detail that hadn’t been released to the public, but I knew because Cam had let it slip. But the thing that disturbed me the most was that she had been left in the same area as the last two, putting Jase back in the frame. Why was he suddenly leaving them in the same place? He’d never done that before. My mind briefly glossed over the idea that he was deliberately trying to frame Jase for the murders, but why would he do that? And that would add to the theory that this was someone we knew, making the possibility that my parent’s deaths were connected even more likely.
Jase had told the detectives he hadn’t spoken to Kat outside the pub the day she disappeared. No one could confirm that, but he did have an alibi for the rest of the day, a construction site full of builders could vouch for him. He was also at work at the time of her death. That was proof enough for me even if it wasn’t enough for them. Plus, if this did go back as far as we thought it might, Jase was only a child when the first murders happened and he was definitely not the man who had abducted me. Unless, as Cam had helpfully suggested, this was a copycat killer, that could definitely put Jase in the frame. He had argued that someone could have become obsessed with either me or the original killer. It wouldn’t have taken much to find out details from the case and copy them; the media had been full of stories, despite my refusal to speak to them. I just could not believe Jase had anything to do with this. He was innocent, I was certain of it. Adam had told me that he believed the detectives on the case weren’t fully convinced, they just didn’t have anything to hold Jase on. He tactfully withheld his own opinion.
“Evening Mal.” I attempted to smile through my sombre mood as I joined Mick behind the bar and made conversation with the regulars. “You staying for the band tonight?”
“Oh no, these old ears can’t handle that kind of noise.” He teased, nodding towards his drink. “I’ll be on my way after this one.”
“Well, you enjoy your evening.” I said, turning to serve Ethan and his group of friends who always came in when Frost were playing.
“You too Callie.” Mal replied.
The mood lightened later on when Frost began their set. They were one of our regular acts and as usual when they played the bar was busy and the atmosphere was good. I spied Sally and Nat at the front of the crowd, I knew Nat had a bit of thing for one of the band members, but I didn’t know which one. I hoped it wasn’t Matt since he had upped his flirting with me since Jase and I broke up. I was sure it was all done in jest, but I didn’t want Nat getting the wrong idea if he was the one she had her eye on. She looked like she was on full form tonight, dancing around in front of the stage and I briefly felt sorry for the poor fella, then I smiled and thought go girl!
Mick and I had a few games we liked to play between ourselves behind the bar when it was just the two of us working. Tonight, during the band’s interval, we were playing what we had dubbed the tequila challenge. This involved each of us taking it in turns to get on our knees behind the bar while the other poured tequila into our mouths. The customers timed us and whoever lasted longest won. If I won all the women in the bar got a free shot and if Mick won, the men got a free shot.
I was currently pouring tequila from a great height (ha, yeah I know, Cam would have a joke about that) into Mick’s mouth, having just lasted sixteen seconds myself. Mick signalled me to stop at thirteen, but I carried on, stopping at sixteen. Mick stood, a sly grin on his face and prowled towards me. He grabbed my face in his hands, tilted my head back and kissed me- passing tequila from his mouth to mine. He let go and laughed loudly, taking a bow, to cheers around the bar. I half choked, half laughed and hoarsely declared a draw.
“Free shots for everyone!” I called ringing the bell and grinning at Mick.
“You’ll pay for all that tequila Callie love.” he said winking at me.
“I’ll add it to the cost of my investment!” I laughed as he began to line up the shot glasses along the bar.
“Step back fellas, ladies first in this establishment.” Mick addressed the men
closest to the bar.
“Because we is proper like that.” I mocked.
“Posh, that’s us love, practically a wine bar!” he laughed as he began to pour out the shots.
As the ladies finished we set out more glasses and the men moved in to take their free shot. Adam beckoned to me from the end of the bar.
“How are we going to share this one?” he indicated the tiny glass on the bar. “I like Mick’s idea, but I’m afraid if I do that then every other man in the place will want the same treatment and I can’t have that.”
“No, couldn’t have anyone else marking your territory could we?” I teased as I picked up the shot and downed it, before re-filling it and passing it to him with a wink that made him laugh. “Same glass, two shots. Problem solved.”
“Things are looking better over there.” Mick observed when I walked back towards him, leaning into his embrace as he put an arm out for me to step into.
“ Yeah, it’s funny how you suddenly find answers when you stop asking questions.” I smiled.
“It’s good to see, love.” Mick squeezed my shoulder affectionately and I ventured out into the mass of people to hunt down some empty glasses since we were running low.
I paused to talk to Luke and Nate, who had joined Ethan and his friends while I was clearing a table at the back of the pub.
“We still good for Tuesday Cal?” Nate asked, grinning at Ethan’s wolf whistle and goading as he spoke to me.
“We certainly are.” I confirmed. Nate had rearranged our night out for a later date but had been cagey about why.
“Good, got a surprise for you.” he grinned again.
“Oh?” I pried.
“Well I’m not going to tell you am I?” he laughed and slung an arm around my shoulders.
“Coming on to my girlfriend Nate? I thought we dealt with this years ago?” We turned to see Jase’s angry face glaring at us. Ethan turned to one of his friends and said something, speaking quickly into his ear, the friend then disappeared into the crowded pub. I assumed he had been sent to get Vinnie.
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