by James Blish
"A heater, huh? The Boss'll love that."
"A Mr. Bela Okmyx invited us down. He said . . ."
"I know what he said. What he don't tell Kalo ain't worth knowing. He said some boys would meet you. Okay, we're meeting you."
"Those guns aren't necessary," McCoy said.
"You trying to make trouble, bud? Don't give me those baby blue eyes."
"What?"
"I don't buy that innocent routine." Kalo looked at Spock's ears. "You a boxer?"
"No," Spock said. "Why does everybody carry fire-arms? Are you people at war?"
"I never heard such stupid questions in my life." Kalo jerked his gun muzzle down the street. "Get moving."
As they began to walk, Kirk became aware of a distant but growing thrumming sound. Suddenly a squeal was added to it and it became much larger.
"Get down!" Kalo shouted, throwing himself to the street. The people around him were already dropping, or seeking shelter. Kirk dived for the dirt.
A vehicle that looked like two mismatched black bricks on four wheels bore down on them. Two men leaned out of it with submachine guns, which suddenly produced a terrible, hammering roar. Kalo got off a burst at it, but bis angle was bad for accuracy. Luckily, it was not good for the gunners in the car, either.
Then the machine was gone, and the pedestrians picked themselves up. McCoy looked about, then knelt by the silent member of the "reception committee," but he was plainly too late.
Kalo shook his head. "Krako's getting more gall all the time."
"Is this the way you greet all your visitors?" Kirk demanded.
"It happens, pal."
"But this man is dead," McCoy said.
"Yeah? Well, we ain't playing for peanuts. Hey, you dopes, get outta here!" He shouted suddenly to what looked like the beginning of a crowd. "Ain't you never seen a hit before? Get lost!"
He resumed herding his charges, leaving the dead man unconcernedly behind. Kirk kept his face impassive, but his mind was busy. A man had been shot down, and no one had blinked an eye; it seemed as though it were an everyday happening. Was this the cultural contamination they had been looking for? But the crew of the Horizon hadn't been made up of cold-blooded killers, nor had they reported the Iotian culture in that state.
A young girl, rather pretty, emerged from a store entrance and cut directly across to them, followed by another. "You, Kalo," she said.
"Get lost."
"When's the Boss going to do something about the crummy street lights around here? A girl ain't safe."
"And how about the laundry pickup?" said the second girl. "We ain't had a truck by in three weeks."
"Write him a letter," Kalo said indifferently.
"I did. He sent it back with postage due."
"Listen, we pay our percentages. We're entitled to some service for our money."
"Get lost, I said." Kalo shook his head as the girls sullenly fell behind. "Some people got nothing to do but complain."
Kirk stared at him. He was certainly an odd sight—odder than before, now that his pockets were stuffed with all the hand equipment from the Enterprise trio, and he had a submachine gun under each arm. But he looked none the less dangerous for that. "Mr. Kalo, is this the way your citizens get things done? Their right of petition?"
"If they pay their percentages, the Boss takes care of them. We go in here."
"In here" was a building bearing a brightly polished brass plaque. It read:
BELA OKMYX
BOSS
NORTHSIDE TERRITORY
The end of the line was an office, large and luxurious, complete with heavy desk, a secretary of sorts and framed pictures—except that one of the frames, Kirk saw, surrounded some kind of pistol instead. A heavy-set, swarthy man sat behind the desk.
"Got 'em, Boss," Kalo said. "No sweat."
The big man smiled and rose. "Well, Captain Kirk. Come in. Sit down. Have a drink. Good stuff—distill it myself."
"No, thank you. You are Mr. Okmyx? This is Mr. Spock, my First Officer. And Dr. McCoy."
"A real pleasure. Sit down. Put down the heater, Kalo. These guys is guests." He turned back to Kirk. "You gotta excuse my boys. You just gotta be careful these days."
"Judging from what we've seen so far, I agree." Kirk said. "They call you the Boss. Boss of what?"
"My territory. Biggest in the world. Trouble with being the biggest is that punks is alia time trying to cut in."
"There is something astonishingly familiar about all this, Captain," Spock said.
"How many other territories are there?"
"Maybe a dozen, not counting the small fry—and they get bumped anyway when I get around to it."
"Do they include, if I may ask," Spock said, "a gentleman named Krako?"
"You know about Krako?"
"He hit us, Boss," Kalo said. "Burned Mirt."
Bela scowled. "I want him hit back."
"I'll take care of it."
Kirk had noticed a huge book on a stand nearby. He rose and moved toward it. Kalo raised his gun muzzle again, but at a quick signal from Bela, dropped it. The book was bound like a Bible, in white leather, with gold lettering reading: Chicago Mobs of the Twenties. The imprint was New York, 1993.
"How'd you get this, Mr. Okmyx?" he asked.
"That's The Book. The Book. They left it—the men from the Horizon."
"And there is your contamination, Captain," Spock said. "An entire gangster culture. An imitative people, one book, and . . ."
"No cracks about The Book," Bela said harshly. "Look, I didn't bring you here for you to ask questions. You gotta do something for me. Then I tell you anything you want to know."
"Anything we can do," Kirk said, putting the book down, "we will. We have laws of our own we must observe."
"Okay," Bela said. He leaned forward earnestly. "Look, I'm a peaceful man, see? I'm sick and tired of all the hits. Krako hits me, I hit Krako, Tepo hits me, Krako hits Tepo. We ain't getting noplace. There's too many bosses, know what I mean? Now if there was just one, maybe we could get some things done. That's where you come in."
"I don't quite understand," Kirk said.
"You Feds made a lot of improvements since the other ship came here. You probably got all kinds of fancy heaters. So here's the deal. You gimme all the heaters I need—enough tools so I can hit all the punks once and for all—and I take over the whole place. Then all you have to deal with is me."
"Let me get this straight," Kirk said. "You want us to supply you with arms and assistance so you can carry out aggression against other nations?"
"What nations? I got some hits to make. You help me make them."
"Fascinating," Spock said. "But quite impossible."
"I'd call it outrageous," McCoy said.
"Even if we wanted to," Kirk said, "our orders are very . . ."
Bela gestured to Kalo, who raised his gun again. Though Kirk did not see any signal given, the door opened and another armed man came in.
"I ain't interested in your orders," Bela said. "You got eight hours to gimme what I asked for. If I don't get the tools by then, I'm gonna have your ship pick you up again—in a large number of very small boxes. Know what I mean, pal?"
Kalo belatedly began to unload the captured devices onto the Boss's desk. He pointed to a phaser. "This here's a heater, Boss. I don't know what the other junk is."
"A heater, eh? Let's see how it works." He pointed it at a wall. Kirk jerked forward.
"Don't do that! You'll take out half the wall!"
"That good, eh? Great. Just gimme maybe a hundred of these and we don't have no more trouble."
"Out of the question," Kirk said.
"I get what I want." Bela picked up a communicator, "What are these here?"
Kirk remained silent. Jerking a thumb toward McCoy, Bela said to Kalo, "Burn him."
"All right," Kirk said hastily. "It's a communications device, locked onto my ship."
Bela fiddled with one until it snapped open in his
hand. "Hey," he said to it. "In the ship."
"Scott here. Who is this?"
"This here's Bela Okmyx. I got your Captain and his friends down here. You want 'em back alive, send me a hundred of them fancy heaters of yours, and some troops to show us how to use them. You got eight hours. Then I put the hit on your friends. Know what I mean?"
"No," Scott's voice said. "But I'll find out."
Bela closed the communicator. "Okay. Kalo, take 'em over to the warehouse. Put 'em in the bag, and keep an eye on 'em, good. You hear?"
"Sure, Boss. Move out, you guys."
The warehouse room had a barred window and was sparsely furnished, but it was equipped with another copy of The Book. Kalo and two henchmen were playing cards at a table, guns handy, their eyes occasionally flicking to Kirk, Spock and McCoy at the other end of the room.
"One book," McCoy said. "And they made it the blueprint for their entire society. Amazing."
"But not unprecedented," Spock said. "At one time, in old Chicago, conventional government nearly broke down. The gangs almost took over."
"This Okmyx must be the worst of the lot."
"Through we may quarrel with his methods, his goal is essentially the correct one," Spock said. "This culture must become united—or it will degenerate into complete anarchy. It is already on the way; you will recall the young women who complained of failing services."
"If this society broke down, because of the influence of the Horizon, the Federation is responsible," Kirk said. "We've got to try to straighten the mess out. Spock, if you could get to the sociological banks of the computer, could you come up with a solution?"
"Quite possibly, Captain."
Signaling Spock and McCoy to follow him unobtrusively, Kirk gradually drifted toward the card game. The players looked up at him warily, free hands on guns; but they relaxed again as he pulled over a chair and sat down. The game was a variety of stud poker.
After a few moments, Kirk said, "That's a kid's game."
"Think so?" Kalo said.
"I wouldn't waste my time."
"Who's asking you to?"
"On Beta Antares Four, they play a game for men. Of course, it's probably too involved for you. It takes intelligence."
Antares is not a double star; Kirk had taken the chance in order to warn the sometimes rather literal-minded that he was lying deliberately.
"Okay, I'll bite," Kalo said. "Take the cards, big man. Show us how it's played."
"The Antares cards are different, of course, but not too different," Kirk said, riffling through them. "The game's called Fizzbin. Each player gets six cards—except for the man on the dealer's right, who gets seven. The second card goes up—except on Tuesdays, of course . . . Ah, Kalo, that's good, you've got a nine. That's half a fizzbin already."
"I need another nine?"
Spock and McCoy drew nearer with quite natural curiosity, since neither of them had ever heard of the game. Neither had Kirk.
"Oh, no. That would be a sralk and you'd be disqualified. You need a King or a deuce, except at night, when a Queen or a four would . . . Two sixes! That's excellent—unless, of course, you get another six. Then you'd have to turn it in, unless it was black."
"But if it was black?" Kalo said, hopelessly confused.
"Obviously, the opposite would hold," Kirk said, deciding to throw in a touch of something systematic for further confusion. "Instead of turning your six in, you'd get another card. Now, what you are really hoping for is a royal fizzbin, but the odds against that are, well, astronomical, wouldn't you say, Spock?"
"I have never computed them, Captain."
"Take my word they're considerable. Now the last card around. We call it the cronk, but its home name is klee-et* Ready? Here goes."
*A Vulcan word meaning, roughly, "prepare to engage." See "Amok Time," Star Trek Three.
He dealt, making sure that Kalo's card went off the table. "Oops, sorry."
"I'll get it."
Kalo bent over. In the same instant, Kirk put his hands under the table and shoved. It went over on the other two. McCoy and Spock were ready; the action was hardly more than a flurry before the three guards were helpless. Kirk parceled out the guns.
"Spock, find the radio transmitting station. Uhura is monitoring their broadcasts. Cut in and have yourself and Bones beamed up to the ship."
"Surely you are coming, Captain?"
"Not without Bela Okmyx."
"Jim, you can't . . ."
"This mess is our responsibility, Bones. You have your orders. Let's go."
Kirk at first felt a little uneasy walking a city street with a submachine gun under his arm, but no one passing seemed to find it unusual. On the contrary, it seemed to be a status symbol; people cleared the way for him.
But the walk ended abruptly with two handguns stuck into his ribs from behind. He had walked into an ambush. How had Bela gotten word so fast?
The answer to that was soon forthcoming. The two hoods who had mousetrapped him crowded him into a car—and the ride was a long one. At its end was another office, almost a duplicate of Bela's; but the man behind the desk was short, squat, bull-shaped and strange. He arose with a jovial smile.
"So you're the Fed. Well, well. I'm Krako—Jojo Krako, Boss of the South Territory. Hey, I'm glad to see you."
"Would you mind telling me how you knew about me?"
"I got all Bela's communications bugged. He can't make a date with a broad without I know about it. Now you're probably wondering why I brought you here."
"Don't tell me. You want to make a deal."
Krako was pleased. "I like that. Sharp. Sharp, huh, boys?"
"Sharp, Boss."
"Let me guess some more," Kirk said. "You want—uh—heaters, right? And troops to teach you how to use them. And you'll hit the other bosses and take over the whole planet. And then we'll sit down and talk, right?"
"Wrong," Krako said. "More than talk. I know Bela. He didn't offer you beans. Me, I'm a reasonable man. Gimme what I want, and I cut you in for, say, a third. Skimmed right off the top. How do you like that?"
"I've got a better idea. You know this planet has to be united. So let's sit down, you, me, and Bela, get in contact with the other bosses, and discuss the matter like rational men."
Krako seemed to be genuinely outraged. "That ain't by The Book, Kirk. We know how to handle things! You make hits! Somebody argues, you lean on him! You think we're stupid or something?"
"No, Mr. Krako," Kirk said, sighing. "You're not stupid. But you are peculiarly unreasonable."
"Pally, I got ways of getting what I want. You want to live, Kirk? Sure you do. But after I get done with you, you're liable to be sorry—unless you come across. Zabo, tell Cirl the Knife to sharpen up his blade. I might have a job for him." The smile came back. "Of course, you gimme the heaters and you keep your ears."
"No deal."
"Too bad. Put him on ice."
The two hoods led Kirk out.
On shipboard, Spock's fortunes were not running much better. There turned out to be no specifics in the computer, not even a record of a planet-wide culture based on a moral inversion. Without more facts, reason and logic were alike helpless.
"Mr. Spock," Uhura said. "Mr. Okmyx from the surface is making contact. Audio only."
Spock moved quickly to the board. "Mr. Okmyx, this is Spock."
"How'd you get up there?" Bela's voice asked.
"Irrelevant, since we are here."
"Uh—yeah. But you'd better get back down. Krako's put the bag on your Captain."
Spock raised his eyebrows. "Why would he put a bag on the Captain?"
"Kidnapped him, dope. He'll scrag him, too."
"If I understand you correctly, that would seem to be a problem. Have you any suggestions?"
"Sure. You guys got something I want. I can help you get the Captain back. No reason we can't make a deal."
"I am afraid I find it difficult to trust you, sir."
"What's to tr
ust? Business is business. We call a truce. You come down. My boys spring Kirk. Then we talk about you giving me a hand."
"Since we must have our Captain back," Spock said after a moment, "I accept. We shall arrive in your office within ten minutes. Spock out."
McCoy had been standing nearby, listening. "You're going to trust him?"
"If we are to save the Captain, without blatant and forceful interference on the planet, then we must have assistance from someone indigenous. At the moment, we are forced to trust Mr. Okmyx." He turned toward Scott. "Mr. Scott, although I hope to avoid their use, I think you should adjust one of the phaser banks to a strong stun position."
"Now," McCoy said, "you're starting to make sense."
Spock did not reply, since nothing in the situation made sense to him. Trusting Okmyx was nothing short of stupid, and the use of force was forbidden by General Order Number One. In such a case, the only course was to abide by the Captain's principle of letting the situation ripen.
Bela, of course, had a trap arranged. Spock had expected it, but there had been no way to avoid it. What he had not expected—nor had Bela—was the abrupt subsequent appearance of Kirk in the doorway, with a submachine gun under his arm.
"How did you get away?" Spock asked interestedly, after the gangsters had been disarmed—a long process which produced a sizable heap of lethal gadgets, some of them wholly unfamiliar.
"Krako made the mistake of leaving me a radio; that was all I needed for the old trip-wire trick. I thought I told you to get to the ship."
"We have been there, Captain. The situation required our return."
"It may be just as well. Find out anything from the computers?"
"Nothing useful, Captain. Logic and factual knowledge do not seem to apply here."
"You admit that?" McCoy said.
"With the greatest reluctance, Doctor."
"Then you won't mind if I play a hunch?" Kirk said.
"I am not sanguine about hunches, sir, but I have no practical alternative."
"What are you going to do, Jim?"
"Now that I've got Bela," Kirk said, "I'm going to put the bag on Krako."
"On Krako?" Bela said. "You ain't serious?"