Harry reached for his hand and he caught it, wrapping his fingers through hers. “Does Rie believe she caused the accident?”
“Yeah. She was just a kid, but she was wild.” Rand smiled gently. Harry remembered Rie at fourteen, so loud and confident, sure about what she wanted and how to get it even then. “She wanted to quit school and get a job. Mum and Dad said no, of course she couldn’t. They’d had the argument a hundred times before but this time she said she’d leave home and that’s what did it. They both turned around to shout at her.” He paused.
Was he seeing the accident? Harry squeezed his hand.
“I’m the only one who saw the truck.” Rand took a deep breath and cracked the door of the car open, letting in the sharp tang of salt air. “Dad blamed her too. He wasn’t the same with her afterwards and she knew it. Then he got sick and they never reconciled. Made it hard on me, being between the two of them and knowing he was going to die and knowing she blamed herself for that too.”
They sat quietly, Rand’s hand cool in Harry’s despite the heat of the day.
“She can’t forgive herself. She never missed a day of school. She never did anything at less than one hundred percent full speed. She punishes herself every day.”
“But you forgave her. That must count.”
“I love her. If it hadn’t been for Rie, I’d have just drifted. I didn’t want anything bad enough. She just kept kicking my ass til I got with the program. I forgave her. It could just have easily been me that caused it, or Dad or the semi driver. We’ll never know for sure.”
“I can’t imagine you drifting. I can’t imagine you that way.”
“I changed. Of course I changed. I had to grow up fast. Rielle thinks people can’t fundamentally change. She still thinks she’s a fourteen year old killer, but she’s wrong. Stuff changes us.”
They watched as a family, mum, dad and two kids—a boy and a girl—threw a ball, their dog barking excitedly. “I don’t think I can face the beach.” Rand pulled the car door closed. “Can’t do the fan thing tonight. Do you mind if we go back to the hotel?”
“Room service and an early night, sounds good,” said Harry, hand on the ignition, but she didn’t start the car—she needed to know. “Am I just a distraction, Rand?”
“Why would you say that?” he responded sharply.
“Like Jake says he is for Rielle, am I just—” she couldn’t finish the question.
Rand put his hand to her face. “Jesus no, Harriet Young. You’re not a distraction; you’re the main game. If we hadn’t come back, I’d be without you and I can’t bear to think about that.”
Harry tilted her face into his hand and watched him. The colour had come back into his cheeks and he was smiling gently when he said, “I’m not going to be without you until the day you decide you’ve had enough.”
She turned her head and put a kiss to his palm. “I hope you’re good at waiting.”
His smile broadened. “Don’t be so sure about what Jake says. He’s something more to Rie. I’m not sure she knows it yet, but wait and see.”
This time when Harry drove down Campbell Parade and up Bondi Road towards the city, Rand was watching the passing scenery with interest and tapping his foot to the song playing low on the radio. She snuck a look at him when the traffic allowed. This was the man she’d come to know and didn’t want to be without. He wasn’t so unrecognisable from the boy she knew. He was still smart and honest, still compassionate and thoughtful, still strong, but now wiser, more centred, and a determined survivor.
39. Bounce
When Jake woke up, the place beside him in bed was empty, and the suite was ominously quiet. He scrambled upright. Her nightmare was still in his head. God, where was she? “Arielle!”
“What?” She appeared from the bathroom, a quizzical expression in her green eyes.
He slumped back down. “Shit, don’t do that.”
“Don’t do what?” She bounced on the edge of the bed.
He reached for her but she shifted away. She was Gym Girl; her blonde hair slicked back from her face, her bare skin flushed and healthy. She was Arielle; dark circles under her eyes still evident but not as prominent. And she was his.
“Don’t scare me.” He lunged for her again, but she moved just outside his reach.
“Man, you scare easy.”
“Only when it concerns you.”
“And heights.”
He groaned. “Low blow. Kick a man when he’s naked in your sheets.”
She struck a pose, balanced on the edge of the bed on her knees, and poked her tongue out at him.
“Why are you dressed like that?”
“I’ve got a plan.”
“I’ve got a plan too.” He lunged for her again. “It involves you and me, breakfast, a hot shower and this bed.”
On her feet now, she said, “My plan is better.”
Jake folded his arms behind his head, stretched back against the headboard, the sheet puddling across his lap. “Oh yeah—convince me.”
She took a step forward and he gave her an ‘I’ve won this now grin’, so she said, “Oh no, you have to get up.”
He scrambled back down into the bed and pulled the sheet over his head.
“Is that designed to make me want to wrestle with you?”
He laughed. If he played this right, she’d be under here with him.
“I’m waiting.”
Muffled by the sheet, he said, “Me too.”
She stepped up onto the bed and stood across his hips, like the day when he’d been under the amp stack. He flipped the sheet back off his head and looked up at her, not sure if he should expect a choke hold or a cuddle. He went to reach for the back of her knees and she bounced away.
“Oh no! Get up, Jake. Come on. We’re going to do a workout.”
He groaned and she dropped to her knees, bent over him and whispered hot in his ear, “I promise you’ll like it.”
Fifteen minutes later, Jake was showered, dressed, standing in the empty gym and watching Rielle lock the door with a key she’d acquired. He wasn’t complaining, but he was wondering what she had in mind.
It was a well fitted out gym with a full set of weights with a bench press as well as the usual cardio equipment. It opened out onto a rooftop pool. Treated floor to ceiling glass stopped the sun from blazing through and helped to keep the room cool while allowing a great view of the city. Rielle locked the door to the pool as well, then pressed herself against the glass, a wicked smile on her face.
Jake was catching on quickly. A surge of desire licked through his body. “Just what sort of a workout were you thinking about, Ms Mainline?” he said, in the guise of the personal trainer.
She shrugged, played it cool. “I like to be worked hard.”
He groaned. As sex fantasies go, this one was up there with the best of them: a bewitchingly beautiful woman—a famous rock star; an empty, locked gym; a glittering pool and a shimmering skyline just outside. Add to that he was in love with the rock star, and not entirely sure whether people claiming deck chairs by the pool could see inside the gym or not, and Jake was near twitching with excitement.
“Have we met before?” he said, advancing on her. He could meet her one hundred times and not be able to understand all of her.
“I don’t think so.”
“You look familiar.” She looked like a fighter, a survivor.
She shook her head. “I think I’d remember if I’d met you, honey.”
She looked like a lover who was stronger than he’d ever imagined. “No, we’ve definitely met before.” He crowded her into the cool, dark glass, a hand either side of her shoulders.
She looked away, licked her lips, one finger rolling under the strap of her fitted Lycra gym top. She made it slap against her skin and Jake inhaled quickly. “Yeah, we’ve met. You’re following the band.”
She changed her rhythm completely, dropped cool and turned fan girl. “Yeah, I’m a groupie. I’m desperate to meet th
em. Do you know them?”
“Oh yeah, I know them. I work on the show. I could get you backstage, baby.”
She fluttered her eyelashes, quirked her head to the side, and bit her lip. “You could?”
“Oh yeah, baby. But we’d need to come to an arrangement.” Jake brought his face close to hers, breathing in the perfume of her soap.
Rielle strained to hold still. She wanted him to touch her. She wanted to touch him. “What kind of an arrangement?”
“One of mutual benefit.”
“Yeah, what exactly were you thinking?”
“I was thinking a whole bunch of things my mother wouldn’t want me to say out loud.”
She laughed, broke character. “Jake! Good thing your mother isn’t in the room.”
“Damn good thing.”
“So this arrangement, would it have anything to do with me putting out?”
“That might work.”
“So if I kissed you, could you get me backstage?”
He shook his head, straightened up and pulled away. “No, for a kiss, I just tell you I can get you inside, then leave you waiting all night outside the stage door.”
She fought a laugh. “That’s not very nice.”
“That’s rock n roll, baby doll.”
“What about if I…” She dropped her eyes to his groin and then pressed her body against his.
Jake groaned on a grin. “That would get you backstage, baby. But nowhere near the band. See, you need a green room pass and they’re special.”
“So, if I let you—” she licked her top lip, dropped her voice to a whisper, “if I let you…” She hesitated and he knew what was coming and adored the way she was playing the tease. “Fuck me?”
“That would get you a green room pass—all the way, baby.” He folded one arm around her and scooped her closer.
He took her against the dark glass wall, no longer caring if anyone could see in. No longer conscious of any game or any care except pleasing her, and his own delight. He held her gaze and showed her love the only way she’d take it from him.
Despite the air-conditioning they were both slick with sweat when he moved them to the weight bench. She lowered herself onto him, giving him a breathless lap dance that ended with a bone rattling climax for both of them.
It wasn’t until they were dressing again that he noticed the security camera. Fuck. She followed his eyes and saw the dome shaped camera as well.
“Oh shit, Jake. We have to get that tape.”
He pulled her in for a last deep kiss. “I enjoyed our workout. You go order breakfast—I’ll go get the porn tape.”
She laughed and unlocked the two doors letting Jake out into the corridor.
When he located the security room, he braced for some fast talking. This could go a couple of ways. The cameras might record but the file might never be watched unless an incident required it, or someone might physically monitor the cameras real-time as part of a security detail. Jake prayed for the former but banked on the latter, especially given the increased security measures they’d taken since the Bolt from the Blue incident in Melbourne.
When the security officer opened the door and grinned at him, he knew Rand’s extra vigilance had cost him and Rielle their privacy.
“Yeah well, I guess you know why I’m here.”
“That was you in the gym?” said the door-opener.
What was a man to do? Jake grinned, gave a quick shrug.
“Mate, that girl was hot. Me and Carl, we’ve seen some things in the hotel over the years, but that was smokin’.” The door-opener grinned, stepping back so Jake could see Carl in front of a computer and a bank of screens.
Trying to keep it professional, despite the smile playing under a greying moustache, Carl said, “Is she a guest here? Does she know about the camera?”
“She saw it, same time as I did. You know I want the file.”
“Yeah, we figured.” Carl nodded. “Is she who we think she is?”
Jake was hoping Rielle’s gym girl look was going to keep this from getting more complicated. “Who do you think she is?”
“That singer. She asked for the key this morning. It doesn’t look like her but, we thought—”
“Not her,” said Jake, eyeballing Carl.
“So you say. How do we know for sure you aren’t going to set the lovely lady up, whoever she is, and post the file on some porno website?”
“How do I know you haven’t already done that and have Channel Nine on standby?” parried Jake.
Carl inclined his head. “Mate, you don’t.”
“What do you want?”
The door-opener said, “Tickets. Can you get us tickets?”
Jake shook his head. “I can’t, we’re sold out.”
“Well that’s it, Carl. We put it on YouTube then.”
“Wait, I can get you backstage.”
“Nah, mate. It was tickets or nothing. We’ve already met the band.”
“Dave, stop messing with him,” said Carl laughing. “We know who you are. We know who she is. We met Rand. He came to check hotel security.”
Jake exhaled and took the data stick Carl held out. He watched him delete the file from the computer log. “Jesus, you guys.”
“Mate,” said Dave, “You just did Rielle Mainline. You had to pay somehow.”
Jake shook his head and grinned. He pocketed the data stick. “One more thing—that glass?”
“Ordinary glass, mate. Gave the sunbakers a show, can’t help you with that,” said Carl. He and Dave laughed when Jake groaned. His sex fantasy was now a reality nightmare.
Dave clapped him on the shoulder and winked. “Would we lie to you?”
Jake breathed out. “Okay, okay, I’ve paid,” he said, relief flooding through him.
He left the room to the sound of raucous laughter. By the time he got back to Rielle’s suite he felt like a big game hunter having stalked and trapped his prey.
She was dressed in more typical Rielle fashion now, hairpieces arranged, makeup on, contacts and tooth prosthetic in place. He came to her side, stroked her arm, bent to kiss her. He was determined to show her he didn’t care what look she wanted to wear.
“What did that cost you?” she asked.
“A couple of backstage passes.”
She laughed. “No problem. Are we safe?”
“Yeah. I watched them delete the file. I don’t think they copied it.” He threw the data stick on the table with the room service tray. “That will scare the grandkids.”
Rielle dropped her arms and moved to the couch. “Won’t be any of them, Jake.”
He slumped down beside her. “Ah, you don’t know. Maybe one day you’ll want to be a rock chick and a hot baby mamma.”
“No I won’t.”
Jake rolled over. He put his head in Rielle’s lap. “Don’t be so sure. You might change your mind.”
Her hands got tight in his hair, her fingers digging into his skull. He’d messed up somehow. “I can’t have kids.”
He looked up at her. “Can’t or don’t want to?” The words got shocked out of him.
She pushed him away and stood up. “Can’t. Physically can’t because of the accident.”
Fuck. Jake jumped up. He reached for her, but she stepped away.
“It’s better this way anyway.”
He sat back down, watched her ignore the breakfast spread, turn on her tablet computer, shut herself away from him and become the lone wolf again.
They’d come so far in the last twenty-four hours. He understood now what it meant to her to let him see her without her disguises. And he hadn’t thought to see her bounce back so strongly from the visit to the accident site, but she had, and he’d thrilled to the way she’d captured the morning and given him an incandescent memory.
Then he had to screw it all up and remind her of what she’d suffered and lost.
He left the room, walked out to the balcony and looked out across the city. He knew himself to be in ov
er his head with this woman. Knew he might never get it right for her and never get over it.
40. Other People’s Mothers
Somewhere between Glen and Tim accusing each other’s teams of incompetence, Jake’s phone rang. He let the practised insults fly and answered it, but his, “Hi Mum,” managed to arrest the attention of every man at the table. No mean feat given the honour at stake.
There was an echo of, “Hi Mum” and a chorus of, “Hi Mrs Reedy”.
Jake said, “Yes Mum, I’m at work,” and there was laughter when he added, “Yes Mum. The boys say hi,” followed by, “Yes Mum. They’re all listening, and yes I am embarrassed.”
Then he said, “No Mum. I’m not inviting any of the friggin’ bastards to dinner,” finishing with, “Sorry about the language, Mum. I’ll call you later.”
He put the phone down on the trestle table, looked up to see a dozen faces staring at him expectantly. “What?”
Glen said, “Reedy, maybe your mum could come and run our production meetings. She’d probably do a better job than you. She got everyone’s attention.”
“Mrs Reedy rocks,” said Bodge.
And Tef said, “Yeah and if there wasn’t already a Mr Reedy, you’d be angling to be little Jakey’s new daddy.”
Along with half the table, Jake groaned and Bodge coloured. They all knew Bodge had a thing for Jake’s mum.
“How many Mrs Bodges would that make?” said Lizard.
“Shut it Liz, or I’ll make you a Mrs with me boot,” said Bodge.
This was their last production meeting for the tour. Sydney, the last city, four shows in two days time. For most of the road crew Sydney was home so there were also distractions; family and friends to see, other jobs to line up. Keeping everyone focussed was a challenge.
When the meeting broke up, Jake called Mum, then he called Rielle. She was with Rand and Harry doing a studio shoot for the doco. He got voicemail and hesitated, unsure if a message was the right way to go, then said, “Hey Rie, if you get a chance, call me,” and left it at that.
Getting Real Page 28