“Reese?” She sounded upset.
And he knew. “It’s Elliott,” he said. “Something’s happened to Elliott.” He should have pressed harder. Taken some action that would make the kid to talk to him...
“He’s just been blessed with a new father, Reese.” Her sniffle distracted him. Faye was crying.
That meant...
“I’m his father?” Oh, God. Something was wrong with him. His hands were trembling like a girl’s.
“Yes. They said the test was unequivocal. A match on all markers.”
“I’m his father.” Coherency wasn’t an option. Reese didn’t have a coherent thought in his head.
Faye’s sniffle brought him back enough to know he was still on the phone with her. And that the news affected more than just him.
“Have you told Frank?” First things first. Get the abusive man out of their lives. Which meant...
“We have to visit San Diego county records and get his name off the birth certificate,” he said. The man had hurt Elliott enough. There was no way he’d ever have access to the boy again.
Yes. That was right. Take action. Do what he could to be of the most help in the situation.
“Okay.”
Good. The woman hadn’t argued for once.
No, that wasn’t fair. Faye had always been pretty agreeable.
“Where are you?”
“At the station. Sitting out in my car.”
He nodded. She was on shift. Of course she was at the station.
“I’m his father.” Wow. He felt kind of sick to his stomach.
And a tad bit like a superhero, too. But that would fade. As soon as he processed...
“Yeah.”
“So...now what?” He didn’t want to hang up yet.
“I haven’t been in touch with Frank since the divorce. I don’t even know where he is, nor do I want to know. I’ll contact my attorney, who will notify him. And I’ll call to see what changing his birth certificate entails. I hadn’t thought of that and it’s a great idea. Absolutely necessary.”
Fine. They had a plan.
“But in the meantime... I guess this means we need to schedule a meeting with Sara Havens ASAP.”
ASAP. Because he was a father.
Reese had to call his mother. She’d want to fly home to meet the boy.
Best wait on that one.
“Fine.”
“When is good for you?”
It dawned on him. Faye was the mother of his child.
Closing his eyes, he leaned his head back against the headrest.
“What happened to Len?”
“Sorry?”
He was tired. So tired, yet pulsating in every fiber of his being.
“Len would have been around Elliott, he would have been helping you...what happened to him?”
Len Browning was his son’s grandfather. He needed to know.
“He was killed, Reese.” He heard pain more than words.
“Killed how?” He should have been there. He’d let them both down.
“Muggers. He was out late one night, walking his dog. They jumped him. He refused to give up his wallet and they shoved him. He hit his head against a tree. They took his wallet and ran. He was dead the next morning when someone in the neighborhood found him. It was seven years ago.”
Anger boiled. Burned. Left him with a hole deep inside. “I’m sorry.” He should have been there.
He’d never liked the neighborhood where Faye had grown up. But Len...he’d been the greatest dad.
His son would have been so lucky to grow up knowing him.
“So Elliott doesn’t remember him?”
They had business to take care of. He just needed a few details out of the way. Then he’d be fine.
“They never met.” She sniffled again.
He wasn’t being fair to her. This was a hugely emotional day for her, too. To find out that her boss was her son’s father. That he...Reese...had fathered her only child.
He still couldn’t wrap his mind around that.
“They never met? I don’t understand.” He focused on what he could.
“Dad...didn’t understand why I was suddenly marrying Frank...instead of you. Of course there was no way I could tell him why. He didn’t approve. He wanted me to wait. Frank knew that and took an instant dislike to him, as well. He banned my father from our home. Forbade me to see him...”
Eyes popping open wide, Reese straightened. “He forbade you?”
“I know.” He could feel her sigh through the phone and was certain she’d just shuddered.
He had to let this one go. It wasn’t his business.
And she’d gotten the help she needed on that score. But...
“I’m sorry. About your dad.”
He was livid about the rest of it. But he’d climb a mountain or ten. He’d work through the anger that seemed to be building up inside of him over a lot of things. Faye’s past was not his to fix. He couldn’t do her any good.
And he always stuck to where he could do the most good.
She sniffled again and he knew he’d made her cry.
“About the meeting with Sara, I’ll make myself available anytime. Just let me know when.” He tried to instill calm in the storm raging between them.
Just like he used water to douse flames.
“I’ll talk to her before I pick up Elliott,” Faye said.
Relieved that she’d be seeing the counselor fairly soon, he nodded. She was in good hands.
So why was he still worried about her?
“I can’t believe I’m his father.” He didn’t know why he chose then to remind her.
“I’m so glad you are, Reese. You have no idea how glad. No matter what else happens, what’s to come, I’m thankful beyond measure that you’re his father.”
“Even though it means you married him when you didn’t have to?”
“I don’t know. I don’t think like that. I can’t.”
How could she not?
Or maybe those kinds of thoughts were just off-limits to him. In another hour or so, he’d be good with that.
“I gotta go, Reese.”
“I know, me too.”
“I’ll call as soon as I talk to Sara.”
He nodded. “Thank you.”
He wanted to say more. Knew more needed to be said but before he could figure out what it was, she hung up.
Leaving him alone in his truck, just a fire inspector outside a construction site. No. Not just a fire inspector. Fire chief.
Even that didn’t do it for him.
He looked at the trees. The gravel. The sky. The seats of his truck.
Nothing seemed familiar.
Not even him.
She was right.
He’d changed.
He was Elliott’s father.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
SARA WAS ABLE to meet with them that evening. Her husband, Michael, was a bounty hunter. He was trying to track down a pedophile who’d jumped bail so Michael’s eight-year-old daughter and Michael and Sara’s toddler son were both at the Stand with her that day.
Faye took Elliott home as usual. She was finishing up her third shift in a row. She’d be at the station until ten and then on call for the rest of the night.
As her boss, Reese told her she could take the time from station duties for her meeting at the Stand.
He told her by phone. He hadn’t been in.
She’d yet to see him since he’d found out he was Elliott’s father. But because she was working, couldn’t get to Sara’s office as early as she’d have liked.
As she’d expected, Reese had gotten there first. He and Sara were chatt
ing with the door open as she approached.
In golf shorts and a polo shirt, he was sitting on one end of the couch, his face in shadows. That was the end where Faye usually sat. Sara was in the armchair across from him, a lamp lit on the table beside her. The corner of the room where her desk sat was dark.
He was her son’s father—that oh-so-hot man sitting there, discussing weather patterns on the ocean and how they affected wildfires.
He barely glanced at her as she sat on the opposite end of the couch before returning his attention to the therapist.
“So...” Sara sat forward, looking between the two of them.
Faye tried to catch Reese’s eye, but he was paying intent attention to Sara.
“I understand that we are only here to discuss today’s revelation in terms of Elliott,” Sara said.
Reese must have given her to understand that. Faye had not.
She’d rather hoped they would talk about how the two of them were going to cope with this wonderful yet painful turn of events. How were they going to treat each other as parents of the same child? Living as strangers.
“In today’s world, many people who have completely separate lives have a child in common,” Sara continued. “There’s no reason why Elliott can’t be made to feel comfortable with the situation, given time. The way your son will cope with this is largely up to the two of you.”
Sara looked at Reese. So Faye did, too. He was nodding in Sara’s direction.
Suddenly, sitting there so close to him—and yet so far away—she couldn’t bear to see him. Finding out they had a son together should have returned some measure of closeness between them.
Instead, the chasm seemed to have deepened. He was acting more distant than even an employer would. He was acting as though she didn’t exist, like she wasn’t even in the room.
She understood. She couldn’t blame him. He was a man who’d always wanted a family—in spite of his bunk about not living up to expectations—and she’d kept him from the first years of his son’s life. Added to that injury was the fact that, largely because of her choices, his son had significant emotional issues.
He had to be furious with her.
Sara interrupted her thoughts. “In my recent conversation with Elliott regarding his father, he revealed that he is struggling with the idea of being the son of a ‘bad man.’ His words. I don’t know that he’s rationalized it all.
“But his answers to my questions certainly indicated there’s an issue there. I think this new turn of events couldn’t have come at a more critical time and depending on how things are handled in the next little bit, you could very well see vast improvement in him more rapidly than we’d hoped.
“There are no guarantees, of course. There are never guarantees. But today’s news could potentially be a lifesaver for your son.”
Your son. Heretofore those words had only referred to her. Frank had never, not once, been present for any meeting regarding Elliott, or even attended school functions.
Elliott wasn’t Frank’s son!
That was going to take some getting used to. But even with Reese’s distance, with his probable anger, even with the regrets that were eating her alive, she was still utterly and completely thankful.
She hadn’t given her child Frank as a father. She’d given him Reese.
She’d gotten that one thing completely right...
“Do either of you have ideas as to how you’d like to break the news to Elliott?”
Faye looked to Reese, who shook his head, his eyes still on Sara.
“I was hoping you’d have some direction for me...us,” Faye said. She was getting what she wanted. She had to buck up here.
There were just so many things she’d missed. The little things.
Not me.
Us.
Our son now meant her and Reese.
Nice to think about not having to make all of the decisions on her own. But she also had to remember that she didn’t have the right to make decisions alone, either. She had to think about no longer having the exclusive right to make happen what she wanted for Elliott.
Sara took a moment and assessed the two of them.
Faye could only imagine what she was thinking. How were two people who couldn’t even acknowledge each other in a room manage to raise an insecure, emotionally needy child together?
“What I’d suggest is that you, Faye—” Sara nodded in her direction “—and I talk to Elliott together. Here. At The Lemonade Stand. All around, it seems best to me. I feel that it’s a given that Reese should not be there. Elliott only knows him as the fire chief, and that very briefly. We need him open, comfortable, as secure as possible when he hears this news. We don’t want him to feel the least bit intimidated.”
“Agreed,” Faye said.
“Agreed.” Reese spoke to Sara, but he sounded...congenial. Like he wasn’t there under duress, but because he’d chosen to be there.
I’m his father. Reese’s repeated words from earlier that day came back to her. He had to be in shock. She had no business judging him, period, but especially not right then.
“I think it’s important to do this here for two reasons,” Sara said.
“Because he doesn’t get as defensive and argumentative with you.” Faye had to put it out there herself, before the counselor told Reese how little her son respected her.
“Here he doesn’t push his boundaries,” Sara agreed. “He doesn’t trust us enough to express the full brunt of his anger. Which means that here, he’ll be more amenable to taking in, rather than deflecting, what we tell him.”
She liked the way Sara put it better.
“I also think it will be good for him to have someone with a sense of authority break the news,” Sara said. “The less emotional it is when he hears it, the better he’ll be able to allow himself to accept it. At least on a surface level. He’ll be dealing only with his own emotions, not the giver’s, as well.”
Stealing another glance at Reese, she wanted to smile. And cry.
He seemed to be soaking in every breath the counselor took. Talk about absorbing. As though he couldn’t get enough, fast enough. He might not want to be a real father but he sure as heck seemed to be trying to get his new role right.
Because he was a good man.
She’d known that in high school, when the man in him had still been emerging.
Sara continued sharing her thoughts with them, predicting possible reactions, behaviors Elliott could feasibly exhibit over the next days and weeks. Things they could expect. Basically, preparing them to help their son.
“So, we need to decide when we’re going to do this.” Sara looked at Reese. “The biggest burden here, in some ways, is going to fall on you. If Elliott senses that this news is not positive for you, he’ll most likely blame himself for ruining your life. And probably find himself unworthy, unlovable, because his biological father doesn’t want him.”
“Have I given an indication that it’s not positive?”
Sara smiled. “No.”
“Okay, good, then I guess we’re good there.”
“Do you need some time to absorb the ramifications of all this?”
He shook his head. “I don’t think so. It sounds to me like the boy is the critical matter here. I’m an adult. I’m not the one who’s relying on others to look out for me.”
Exactly. Faye couldn’t agree more. With regard to herself and Elliott. She and Frank had never agreed on anything where Elliott was concerned.
Now she knew why. He’d known all along that Elliott probably wasn’t his son. The bastard.
Even after all this time, Frank’s abuse continued to infiltrate her life. But she was free of him. Never had to see him again.
She and Elliott had new lives and...
�
��So, is tomorrow good, then?” Sara asked. “You’re off, right?” She looked at Faye. “I can clear my schedule for the morning. We can give Elliott all the time he needs.”
She looked at Reese. He was nodding at the counselor. “Fine with me,” he said.
And just like that, it seemed to be set.
“Do either of you have any questions or concerns?” Sara asked, seemingly in no hurry to end her work day.
“One,” Reese said.
Faye could only see his expression in profile, but he seemed to be...a lot more calm than she was. There was no emotion, not even anger emanating from him.
Possibly because he was pretending she wasn’t there?
“Is there any particular manner I should use when I do address the boy? After he’s told, when the two of you decide it’s time for me to see him. I don’t want to cause further damage.”
“Just be yourself, Reese,” Sara said. “Elliott’s a smart kid. One of the things we know he values is honesty. Don’t try to pretend to be something you’re not. That will hurt him more than just about anything at this point. That’s why it’s paramount that you are okay with this. If you aren’t and try to pretend otherwise, he’ll know.”
“The struggles I’m facing have nothing to do with Elliott,” Reese said. “As far as he is concerned, I’m eager to do what I can to help. Under the guidelines you and I have already discussed,” he added. “You’ve assured me that as long I speak openly with Elliott about what he can and cannot expect from me, I should be able to be a positive male role model in his life.”
Faye’s heart jumped. He’d met with Sara early. Without her. That whole thing about expectations...he was totally serious about that.
He really thought he couldn’t meet expectations?
The idea didn’t meld at all with the man she’d known.
He was already taking ownership of his part in their son’s life. He wasn’t going to let Elliott down. He was being responsible, doing more in half a day than Frank had done in eight years.
Those were the only things that could matter to her now.
She had to keep her wits about her and her emotions in check. Just as Reese was doing. For their son. Elliott was going to need her now more than ever.
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