by Sally Warner
A problem with the plan
“Suzette’s much funner than Lulu,” Hanni informed Alfie, as if explaining something everyone knew. “Lulu thinks she’s so great,” she added, shrugging.
Wait. That’s kind of more like you, Alfie thought, her breath catching in her throat. What was happening to her secret plan that this really fun group of three girls—Hanni, Lulu, and herself—would be best friends forever?
They’d be perfect together!
“Much funner than Lulu,” Hanni repeated in her bossiest, that’s-that tone of voice. “So I’m gonna go find Suzette, right after I call dibs on the best desk.”
“And then we’ll find Lulu, too,” Alfie added, as if that’s what Hanni had been about to add. “Because she doesn’t think she’s so great. You’ll really like her, Hanni. Once you get to know her better.”
“Maybe,” Hanni said over her shoulder as she pushed her way down the crowded hall.
Whoo, Alfie thought, her heart sinking as she headed after her.
This was going to be harder than she’d thought!
Books by Sally Warner
THE ABSOLUTELY ALFIE SERIES
Absolutely Alfie and the Furry Purry Secret
Absolutely Alfie and the First Week Friends
Absolutely Alfie and the Worst Best Sleepover
THE ELLRAY JAKES SERIES
EllRay Jakes Is Not a Chicken!
EllRay Jakes Is a Rock Star!
EllRay Jakes Walks the Plank!
EllRay Jakes the Dragon Slayer!
EllRay Jakes and the Beanstalk
EllRay Jakes Is Magic!
EllRay Jakes Rocks the Holidays!
EllRay Jakes the Recess King!
EllRay Jakes Stands Tall!
THE EMMA SERIES
Only Emma
Not-So-Weird Emma
Super Emma
Best Friend Emma
Excellent Emma
PUFFIN BOOKS
An imprint of Penguin Random House LLC
375 Hudson Street
New York, New York 10014
Published simultaneously in the United States of America by Viking and Puffin Books, imprints of Penguin Random House LLC, 2017
Text copyright © 2017 by Sally Warner
Illustrations copyright © 2017 by Shearry Malone
Penguin supports copyright. Copyright fuels creativity, encourages diverse voices, promotes free speech, and creates a vibrant culture. Thank you for buying an authorized edition of this book and for complying with copyright laws by not reproducing, scanning, or distributing any part of it in any form without permission. You are supporting writers and allowing Penguin to continue to publish books for every reader.
LIBRARY OF CONGRESS CATALOGING-IN-PUBLICATION DATA IS AVAILABLE
Ebook ISBN: 9781101999905
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To my helpful second grade teacher friends:
Meliscent Peterson Gill, Signe Hanson, and Laura Jackson Brophy —S.W.
To Mom and Dad—thank you for always believing in me and paying for that art degree! You’re both the best. With love —S.M.
Contents
Books by Sally Warner
Title Page
Copyright
Dedication
(1) The Jitters
(2) Three Perfect Ingredients
(3) All-Stars
(4) Icebreaker Time!
(5) An Unexpected Problem
(6) The Assignment
(7) Two Homeworks
(8) Who’s the Boss?
(9) Teamwork
(10) Nightmare Twist
(11) A Word with Mr. Havens
(12) Scramble
(13) Good-night Cuddle
(14) The Perfect S’more
(15) No Harm, No Foul
(16) A Field Trip down the Hall
(17) Perfect Together
(18) In the Dark
1
The Jitters
“Come on, Alfie,” EllRay Jakes said to his seven-year-old sister. “Finish your dinner so we can clear the table and go upstairs. It’s Sunday. Board game night. And it’s my turn to choose.”
It was late August, the night before the first day of school. Alfie was going to be in second grade, and eleven-year-old EllRay would be a sixth grader. It was his last year at Oak Glen Primary School, in Oak Glen, California.
EllRay had already announced that this year, he was going to rule.
“You don’t have to eat everything, sweetie,” their mom told Alfie. “But have another bite of chicken, at least. And some of those carrots. You have to keep up your strength.”
“I absolutely cannot eat,” Alfie said, making a face as she clutched her stomach. “I think maybe I’m getting sick. Tummy trouble, Mom,” she added, her eyes wide.
“Yeah,” EllRay said, pretending to be helpful. “Maybe Alfie should stay home tomorrow and watch TV all day. She can cuddle with Princess, and drink ginger ale, and eat grilled cheese sandwiches until she feels better.”
Princess was their family’s nine-week-old kitten. Alfie hated the thought of leaving her alone five days a week—just for school.
“Be quiet,” she told her brother, swinging her foot in a wide arc under the dining table, trying to kick EllRay’s long, skinny shin. “I mean it. My stomach really feels weird.”
“That’s called having the jitters,” her mom explained. “It’s like stage fright, and it’s totally normal. Look, I know you’re excited, Alfie,” she added, her voice soft. “But there’s nothing to be nervous about. Your school supplies are stacked on your desk,” she said, holding up one slim brown finger as if she were counting. “And your new backpack is adorable. And your first-day outfit is all set and ready to go.”
Three fingers were now in the air.
“Can they be ready to go without me, maybe?” Alfie asked—as if the darling T-shirt, flouncy short skirt, and leggings might be able to head out the door alone tomorrow morning. Her perfect new slip-on sneakers could lead the way.
Let them go to school if they wanted to so much, Alfie thought, making a face.
Let them meet the new kids in class, not to mention her new teacher.
Mr. Havens.
Mr. Havens was also called “Coach” at Oak Glen, because he taught some kids basketball during recess. Mostly boys and older girls.
“Why do I have to have a boy teacher this year?” Alfie almost wailed, asking no one in particular. “Why me?”
“Ha! You’re lucky to have Coach,” EllRay said, giving up on his little sister. He took his plate and silverware to the kitchen.
“And Coach Havens is a man, not a boy,” her mother said.
“But he’s too tall, Mom,” Alfie tried to explain. “He’s so tall that I probably won’t even be able to hear him when he talks. My grades will be terrible! And he’ll probably like the boys in our class better than the girls. And—”
“And nothing, Miss Alfie,” her mother said. “Now you’re just being silly. And you’re working yourself into a tizzy for no reason. This is your third year at Oak Glen Primary School, young lady. You will already know most of the kids in your class,” she continued, starting another invisible list, this one a list of reasons why Alfie should not be having the jitters. “And now that you and Hanni are such pals,” she added, “you’ll have another friend to add to your posse.”
“I’m not a cowboy or a rap star, Mom,” Alfie objected. “I don’t have a po
sse.”
And wasn’t it weird how the words “young lady” always meant trouble? It sounded like they should be a compliment, but no.
She was glad she and Hanni Sobel were now friends, however, Alfie admitted to herself. Hanni lived only one block away, and they were going to carpool together this year. She and Alfie had been in the same first grade class, but the girls weren’t really friends until just a couple of weeks ago.
Hanni had wavy dark hair, green eyes, and cheeks that dimpled when she smiled. But she was also a little bit of a bossy, know-it-all kind of kid—though she actually did know it all, in Alfie’s opinion.
And in Hanni’s opinion, too.
She knew most of it, at least.
Alfie was glad to be starting school with Hanni on her side.
Not only that, but Alfie already had a best school friend from first grade, the always-cute Lulu Marino, though Lulu had been away all summer visiting relatives in Maine. So Alfie would be starting second grade with two good friends, because Hanni and Lulu were sure to like each other, right? Even though they had never hung out much together? After all, Alfie was friends with each of them.
So it just made sense that they would all get along.
Hanni was a leader.
Lulu’s specialty was cuteness.
And Alfie had enough energy for the three of them.
It would be Alfie’s second grade wish come true.
The three of them were going to have so much fun together! In fact, their friendship was Alfie’s first week, second grade wish. Her friend plan. After all, didn’t all the best things come in groups of three?
There were the famous three little kittens who lost their mittens, Alfie thought, tossing a tiny piece of chicken under the table, hoping Princess was there.
And what about the three billy goats gruff? Not that she planned to be gruff.
And how about Wynken, Blynken, and Nod? Whoever they were.
And—there were last summer’s s’mores, Alfie reminded herself, her mouth watering. They were so good that you always wanted some more. S’more.
Graham crackers, marshmallows, and chocolate. Mmm.
Three perfect ingredients—just like Hanni, Lulu, and herself.
Alfie looked down at the remaining chicken and carrots on her plate.
“Two more bites of each,” her mother told her. “And sweetie, you know second grade is going to be so much fun,” she added, as if she had been listening in on Alfie’s silent conversation with herself.
How did her mom do that?
“Come on,” EllRay was urging from the doorway. Tall and thin, he was tapping one of his giant sneakered feet like he meant business.
“Okay,” Alfie told him. “But will Dad be home in time to tuck me in for good luck?” she asked her mom, shoving the carrots around with her fork before popping two slices into her mouth and washing them down with some milk.
Dr. Jakes taught geology at a college in San Diego, about an hour’s drive away.
But he often spent Sunday evenings at a local gym. It was the best weekend time for him to exercise.
Alfie’s dad was not a medical doctor. But people also got to be called “doctor” when they completed the highest level of study in their field, Alfie had learned.
“He will be home by bedtime for sure,” her mom said, nodding. “But your father believes in hard work and science, not luck,” she couldn’t help but add.
“I know,” Alfie said after swallowing her last required bite of chicken. “But I’m the one who has to start second grade tomorrow, Mom,” she added. “And I’m gonna need all the luck I can get.”
2
Three Perfect Ingredients
“Oof. Here we go,” Hanni said, peering out the car window as Mrs. Sobel pulled up in front of the school the next morning. Mrs. Sobel’s long earrings dangled beneath the perfect straight edges of her hair. Sitting behind her in the back seat, Alfie felt as though she’d been hypnotized by those earrings.
Hanni sounded nervous, she thought, surprised.
Hanni Sobel, who had tried to be the boss of the girls in first grade.
Hanni, “the world’s oldest seven-year-old,” according to Alfie’s mom.
Hanni had the jitters, too!
“It’s okay,” Alfie heard herself telling Hanni. “It’s gonna be a really good year.”
“It definitely is,” Mrs. Sobel agreed, reaching around to give her daughter’s knee a squeeze. “Now, Alfie’s mom will be picking you up at three-fifteen. Don’t keep her waiting, ladies.”
“We won’t,” the girls said together. Then each took a deep breath and got out of the car.
Alfie stared at the bustling scene spread before her like she was watching a movie. Her school looked different, as if it had changed in some small, mysterious way over the summer.
It was a brand-new year, and anything could happen! Alfie guessed that was it.
“Let’s go find Lulu Marino,” Alfie said as she and Hanni headed up the crowded steps leading to the school’s wide front door.
“Why?” Hanni asked, waving at Principal James, who prided himself on knowing each kid’s name.
“Hello, Hanni Sobel and Alfie Jakes,” Principal James called out, looking as if he had just checked off two names from an invisible list.
“I think we should find our classroom first,” Hanni told Alfie. “We can peek in and make sure no one has grabbed the best desks yet. Because I want first dibs.”
Hanni was definitely a first-dibs kind of girl, Alfie thought, hiding a smile. “I’m pretty sure Mr. Havens’s class will be on the first floor,” she said. “And still locked.”
Oak Glen Primary School liked to keep the youngest kids away from the stairs at either end of the long central corridor, she knew. “Upstairs is for fourth, fifth, and sixth-graders only,” EllRay had informed her over the summer. “It’s so you little guys don’t mess everything up by falling down the stairs and wrecking the traffic flow.”
“And anyway,” Alfie continued as they passed the school office, “Mr. Havens is probably the type of teacher who tells kids exactly where to sit.”
She remembered Mr. Havens—“Coach”—barking orders on the playground during recess and knew she was right.
“Listen up!”
“Okay, go.”
“Think fast!
“Hup, hup!”
Around them in the hall, clusters of older girls were hugging and telling each other how good they looked. They talked fast, as if there was no way they could possibly catch up on enough of each others’ news before school started.
A few worried-looking kindergartners were hanging back, clinging to their moms or dads. They clearly wanted to return home instead of starting school. Alfie felt sorry for them. “I’m over it!” she heard one little boy yell.
The gleaming hall smelled like fruity shampoo and floor polish.
Some of the older boys, having already locked their bikes or skateboards in the pen in the corner of the playground, joked in loud voices. They shoved each other in a friendly way, for the most part, as they roared their greetings up and down the hall.
“Yo, dude!”
“Dawg.”
“Wassup, bro?”
Alfie thought she heard her brother’s voice in the raucous, ear-ringing mix, but she couldn’t be sure. She felt homesick for EllRay for a second.
“Anyway,” Hanni was saying as loud as she could, “why would I want to go looking for Lulu when I haven’t seen Suzette since the Fourth of July?”
“Huh? Suzette Monahan?” Alfie asked, frowning. She liked Suzette okay. She had known her since their preschool days at Oak Glen’s Kreative Learning and Daycare. But she and Suzette didn’t hang out much anymore.
It was no big deal, they just didn’t.
“Suzette’s much funner tha
n Lulu,” Hanni informed Alfie, as if explaining something everyone knew. “Lulu thinks she’s so great,” she added, shrugging.
Wait. That’s kind of more like you, Alfie thought, her breath catching in her throat. What was happening to her secret plan that this really fun group of three girls—Hanni, Lulu, and herself—would be best friends forever?
They’d be perfect together!
“Much funner than Lulu,” Hanni repeated in her bossiest, that’s-that tone of voice. “So I’m gonna go find Suzette, right after I call dibs on the best desk.”
“And then we’ll find Lulu, too,” Alfie added, as if that’s what Hanni had been about to add. “Because she doesn’t think she’s so great. You’ll really like her, Hanni. Once you get to know her better.”
“Maybe,” Hanni said over her shoulder as she pushed her way down the crowded hall.
Whoo, Alfie thought, her heart sinking as she headed after her.
This was going to be harder than she’d thought!
3
All-Stars
“Listen up and settle down, All-Stars,” Mr. Havens called out from his great height as the second graders churned into the classroom once the door was open. “Stow all your gear in the cubby room, then look for your name tags on the tables and sit down. And no switching places,” he warned. “I have a chart.”
Tables this year, not desks.
Five tables sat so that everyone could see Mr. Haven’s desk if they tried. There were two tables on each side and one in the back. Two kids were to sit on each side of the table, and one at the end. A plastic container of supplies sat at the other end.
This is different, Alfie thought, biting her lip. Huh.
She shoved her backpack into an empty cubby. She adjusted the ruffles on her new skirt as if that might make things feel more normal.
Mr. Havens looked more dressed-up than Alfie remembered from last year, she noted in surprise before searching the spotless tables for her name tag. It was as if he, too, had made an effort to look nice this first day of school.