“Holy shit,” Nick said, looking at us over his shoulder. There was a fear in his eyes I hadn’t seen before.
“What?”
“Funnel cloud,” Nick said pressing both of his palms to his head.
I charged back toward the window and moved the curtain back without thinking. It wasn’t very likely that the men in gas masks would be down there during a storm like this anyway.
Debris was flying through the air as the twister ripped through the city. When I saw a car fly through the air and land in our backyard, I knew we were in trouble.
“Away from the window!” I said waving my arms frantically.
Nick grabbed my arm. “Hallway?”
“I don’t know,” I said shaking my head.
I grabbed Jamie’s hand and pulled him into the kitchen. He copied me as I ducked down behind the island.
The others squeezed in on either side of us just as the building started to shake. Jamie wrapped his arm over my shoulder and tilted me forward, setting his body slightly over mine.
Noises of things crashing outside caused my body to shudder and shake. With each noise, I thought the building was going to collapse.
Blair stood and screamed when a painting fell off the wall. Nick placed both hands on her shoulders and held her down. The wind was so loud I could barely hear him as he tried to calm her down.
It sounded like a plane was about to crash into the building. Something inside another apartment made a loud noise, and it felt as though the building was going to be sucked into the earth.
And then it stopped. As quickly as it had approached, it was gone.
We all stayed still, afraid it would start all over again if we moved.
“Stay here,” Nick said squeezing Blair’s shoulders before he stood. “I’ll check it out.”
We all stood, but none of us moved out of the kitchen. I stared at Nick as he cautiously walked across the floor toward the thankfully still intact window.
“Jesus Christ,” he said, raking his fingers through his hair. “Its… its….”
We all made our way over to the window. Blair dug her fingers into Bronx’s shoulder as she followed him.
Instead of competing for a view at my living room window, I turned toward my bedroom pulling Jamie along with me. We peeked out between the slats of my blinds, and I couldn’t hold in my gasp.
The yard was a mess. There were random pieces of wood and metal debris covering the yard. A tree had been uprooted and apparently thrown into the building. The tree that had been near my window had crashed into the side of the building and looked as though it had caused some damage.
“We’re going to check out the building,” Nick said from just outside my bedroom door.
“I’m coming with you,” I said stepping away from Jamie. I didn’t glance back in his direction because I knew he’d try to stop me.
“We’ll be right back,” Nick said to the others as he peeked out of the peephole.
I reached into my pocket and checked to make sure I had my key. We stepped into the hallway and froze before we’d even had a chance to close the door.
The far end of the apartment building where Jamie’s apartment had been wasn’t there any longer. Wood boards stretched out across the hallway, but between them, I could see the red sky and the rain as it fell down in heavy sheets.
“Let’s take a look that way,” Nick said jerking his chin over my shoulder.
I’d rarely gone down that end of the hallway. When I’d left the building, I always walked past Jamie’s apartment, down the stairs, and out to the parking lot. Now, there was no way to get through.
The floor seemed to squeak loudly as we crept down the messy hall. There was so much scattered junk I could barely find a square of the patterned carpet. It was like all the building materials from the destroyed end of the apartment were sucked into the building.
I followed Nick down the stairs to the first floor. The exit I’d almost never used was blocked by a tree, and I could already see down the hall that the damage on the other end had been extensive.
It hadn’t just been the end of the hallway by Jamie’s apartment that had been destroyed. It was the whole side of the apartment.
There was no way out.
Sixteen
Jamie scratched the stubble on his chin. “This is good though right? That also means there’s no way in.”
“I still want to get to my grandma,” I said softly, avoiding his eyes.
“Yeah, I know, but we can take our time and prepare first,” Jamie said.
Bronx crossed his arms in front of his broad chest. “We’re nearly ready.”
“What about weapons?” Jamie asked.
Nick shook his head. “Now that we’re trapped inside that doesn’t seem likely. Unless we can find something in the remaining apartments, but honestly, I don’t know how safe this building is. I’m not sure we should be wandering around.”
“You know,” I said, smacking my hands down on the kitchen counter, “I could really use a mental break from all of this. I’m freaking exhausted. Can we figure this out later?”
The silence that filled the room chilled my spine. They all stared at me, and all of the eyes focused on me pinched my nerves.
“I’m sorry,” I said releasing a breath, hoping they’d turn away. “We’ve kind of all been through a lot. I just need to gather my thoughts.”
I stepped around Bronx and walked toward my room. Without looking, I knew all their eyes were still on me. I could feel it.
“I’m sure grandma is fine,” Nick said as I stepped in my doorway. “Storm was miles away from her.”
“Maybe I’m not fine,” I said, and I closed the door behind me.
My room was dark, with the faint hue of red splashing against my walls. The worst of the storm had passed, but the clouds still covered the sky. Rain was still coming down, showing no signs of easing up.
First, I sat down on my bed, but when that didn’t relax me, I laid down. My body was so tense every muscle ached.
The more I tried to relax, the tighter everything felt. My head hurt, and if it hadn’t meant going into the other room, I would have taken some headache medicine. But getting up and going out there would have only made everything tighten up more.
I wasn’t sure how much time had gone by, but I was startled by a light knock at the door. I sat up wondering if I had dozed off.
“Yes?” I said my voice a little rough.
“Hey,” Jamie said peeking his head inside. “I was just wondering if I could get you anything. You skipped dinner.”
“I did?” My room was pitch black except for the small amount of candlelight coming in the doorway.
A muscle in my neck twitched, and I winced. I tried to rub away the pain, but it only pulled the muscle harder.
“You okay?” Jamie asked in a soft voice as if worried the others might hear his question.
“Kink,” I said, digging my knuckle into my flesh.
“Here, let me help,” Jamie stepped into the room, leaving the door open a crack to allow the light inside.
He sat down on the bed necks to me, his hands warmed my skin as he slid them over my shoulders. My body didn’t relax under his touch if anything it made me even more tense.
“Relax,” he said softly into my ear.
“Sorry, I’m trying… I’ve been trying.” Fingertips dug into the knot in my neck. “Oh, right there.”
“Here?” he asked, and I nodded. My head tipped back, and my body felt like jelly.
“Yeah, that’s the spot. That’s amazing. Where did you learn how to do that?”
Jamie chuckled. “I pulled a lot of muscles lifting heavy boxes.”
“You’re supposed to lift with your knees.” The words floated out of my mouth like little fluffy clouds.
I could feel Jamie’s breath lightly dancing across my neck. It felt cool against the warmth of my skin.
I turned slightly, and his hands stopped. Our faces were inches apa
rt. Everything inside me tensed up again although this time it wasn’t painful.
His eyes were on my lips and mine on his. He wasn’t moving, but I wanted him to kiss me.
“A-hem,” Nick said, as he pushed open the door.
Jamie backed away and folded his hands in his lap. His back was stiff. All traces of the moment popped like a pin to a balloon.
“Oh, hey sorry,” Nick said. “Was just checking in. Wanted to see if I can get you anything.”
“I’m fine,” I said pressing my lips together. “You don’t need to worry about me. It’s my apartment.”
“Right, sorry. Just worried about my little sister you know,” Nick said tapping the door with his knuckle. “I’ll let you get back to it then. Door closed?”
The knot in my neck instantly returned as did my headache. I should have known that it wasn’t from what I’d gone through, it was because of Nick.
“Just go, Nick,” I said, and Nick closed the door tightly leaving Jamie and me in the complete darkness. I turned toward him, but I wasn’t sure I was looking at him it was so dark. “I’m so sorry about that.”
“It’s fine.” The bed squeaked as he got up. “I should go.”
“You don’t have to,” I said reaching out, but grabbing nothing but air. “My brother is an ass.”
Jamie chuckled, and I wished I could see the little wrinkles by his eyes. “Well I’m not going to argue with that, but I really should get back out there.”
“Oh, okay,” I said hoping the disappointment I was feeling hadn’t been noticeable in the tone of my voice.
I wasn’t even sure why I was feeling disappointed. There were so many other things I needed to be worrying about. I wasn’t even sure I understood what exactly I was feeling for Jamie.
All I’d known was how badly I wanted him to kiss me. It was apparent he hadn’t felt the same. He simply cared about me the same way he’d care about anyone he’d considered a friend.
“Hey,” Jamie said touching the side of my head in the darkness. “There you are.”
His hand slid down my shoulder until he found my hand. He pulled me to my feet.
“This is hard for me to say, but if things were different… it’s not right for us to be in here, and them out there, no matter how badly I wanted to kiss you.”
My chest squeezed inward as my breath caught in my throat. I felt him inching closer. I could feel his warmth even though our bodies weren’t touching.
“But we can’t hide out in here, while everything falls apart out there,” Jamie said.
I swallowed hard trying to find the right words to say. But I couldn’t find them.
“We don’t have to hide,” I said taking a step forward, stopping when my body touched his.
“It’s complicated.”
“It doesn’t have to be,” I said, looking up, struggling to make out the outline of his face.
Jamie’s body stiffened, and then I couldn’t feel him anymore. I heard him as he felt around the room searching for the door.
“Are you sure I can’t get you anything?” he asked as the door opened allowing the light back inside. His face was angled down, refusing to look at me.
“I’ll get something myself,” I said hugging my middle as I turned away.
“Okay, well if you need anything just let me know.”
My jaw stiffened. I turned back to tell him I could take care of myself and that I didn’t need him or Nick worrying about me, but he was gone.
Seventeen
I could hear Bronx and Nick talking in the kitchen. They were discussing going through the bags to make sure we’d have everything we needed. After they’d carefully go through the apartments, they could gather up any last-minute items.
When we were ready, we’d break a window and head out to my grandma’s. Nick was making plans without me. Without input from any of us. I wasn’t at all surprised.
I sat up on my bed and leaned forward until I could see them in the kitchen. I was surprised when Jamie leaned forward resting his palms on the edge of the counter.
“What about Maggie?” Jamie asked.
“We had a good talk, and she says she’s ready whenever we are,” Bronx said.
Nick’s voice was soft. “Now we just need to convince my sister.”
I exhaled slowly. If Maggie was truly ready, then I guess it was time to go.
Maybe I’d been making excuses. Even though I wanted to go, I was afraid of what it was going to be like. Hidden inside my apartment just felt safer.
With what happened between Jamie and me, I was ready. At least I would be ready once we were sure we had everything we needed because it was still going to be a long walk. It was probably safe to bet that none of us had ever walked seventy-five miles before.
It would be better at my grandma’s, but I was worried about the part in between. Once we got far enough away that I didn’t have to worry about the men in gas masks, things would be okay.
After my awkward moment with Jamie, I just wanted to get away. He probably thought I was a desperate loser with how I’d acted.
I tried to shake the memory from my head as I closed the door to change. Might as well go out there and let them all know I was on board.
Nick and Bronx were already going through the bags when I stepped out of my room. They hadn’t even seemed to notice me standing there watching them.
After a few minutes, Nick must have caught a glimpse of me out of the corner of his eye. “Oh, hey sis, we’re just double checking our supplies.”
“I heard,” I said, as I loosely crossed my arms in front of my chest.
“How much did you hear?” Nick stood.
“Probably most,” I said taking a quick glance over my shoulder. Maggie was curled up on the floor staring into space. “You sure she’s ready for this? It’s a long walk. A really, really long walk.”
Bronx nodded. “Getting away from here will help.”
“She said that?” I asked softly.
“She did,” Bronx said looking up at me as he zipped a bag. He stood up and came over to me. “I think getting away from this place will be good for all of us. And not just because it could crumble to the ground at any moment.”
Bronx was probably right, and he hadn’t even seen the condition of the building.
“Okay, so what’s next?” I asked.
“We’re going through our things, then we’ll check the remaining apartments for any last-minute items,” Bronx said. “Then we’ll head out in the morning, right Nick?”
“That’s right,” Nick said without looking away from the bag he was digging around inside of. The bag I’d packed.
My jaw stiffened. “Anything I can do to help?”
“We’re good, thanks,” Nick said zipping up my bag and moving over to the next. He finally looked up at me. “You should eat something and then rest up. Long journey.”
I walked away, making a note to recheck my bag after he left. It wasn’t that I didn’t trust Nick, but, yeah it was totally that. I’d want to be the last to check over my bag to make sure I had everything I needed. That wasn’t something I was going to leave in Nick’s hands.
After an hour or so, they left. My mouth dropped when Jamie walked out of the door with them.
He hadn’t said a word to me the entire morning. In fact, he hadn’t even looked in my direction. Somehow, without even trying, I managed to make a mess of whatever it was that was going on between Jamie and me.
But I just needed to put it behind me. It wasn’t like there had really been anything.
I flopped down on the sofa, pushing the blanket Jamie had been using to the side. I rested my head on my fist and sighed.
“Is that about Jamie?” Blair asked with a smirk.
“Sorry?” My eyebrows squeezed together.
“Your sigh, was that about Jamie?” Blair set down the book she’d been reading. “He’s like really moody.”
My spine stiffened, and I shook my head. “Oh no, it wasn’t.”
>
“Yeah, I bet it was.”
I rolled my eyes, and they landed on Maggie who was still in the same position. Her eyes were closed and her breathing shallow. Her bottle of pills was on its side near her hand, several of the little tablets were sprinkled out onto the floor.
“He can be really sweet though,” Blair said with a softness to her face.
“How long were you two together,” I asked wishing I could take the words back.
Blair grinned, clearly excited to get to talk about herself. “Not long, and it wasn’t like official. We were more casual if you know what I mean.”
Sadly, I did. My stomach swirled.
“There’s nothing going on between Jamie and me,” I blurted.
“Well,” Blair said cocking her head to the side, “I see how he looks at you. There could be something going on. You just have to know—”
“Have you seen what’s going on out there? I’m not the least bit concerned about starting anything between anyone at this point in time,” I said, and it was mostly the truth. Of course, if something with Jamie would have happened, like a kiss, I definitely wouldn’t be regretting it.
Blair shrugged and picked the book back up. “Whatever. I was just offering you some friendly advice.”
Friendly advice? That was probably the last thing I’d ask Blair for. If I needed anything from Blair, it would probably be lip balm, and I probably wouldn’t want to risk sharing that with her either.
“Excuse me,” I said as I pushed myself off of the sofa. She already had her nose back in the book before I’d even taken a step toward the kitchen.
Maybe my stomach wasn’t twisting because I’d been talking to Blair, maybe I was just hungry. I need to fuel up. Rest. I wanted to be ready.
Not to mention it would probably be good for me to spend as little time as possible with everyone because before I knew it, we’d all be out there. Together. Not a minute of alone time.
After I ate, I rested in my bedroom. I stared at the window and listened to the rain as it tapped against the glass. The rainstorm was never-ending.
Several hours later, the guys returned. They hadn’t brought back much, but Nick was carrying his own backpack. He grinned as he showed me a flashlight.
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