That's a Lie

by Victoria Klahr

  Now it’s my fucking turn to be speechless and check her out. I only see a small string resting across her perfectly tanned bare back, and my dick twitches in my shorts. My throat tightens and I hold my breath as I look at her. I get completely hard when she finally looks at me. She turns her head slightly, glancing at me over her shoulder, hair covering half her face, and stares at me with eyes that scream sex. She acts like she’s shy and innocent, but it’s the sexiest fucking look I have ever seen.

  I walk up to her, heart knocking hard against my chest, and gently run my fingers across her back. I trail them until I am standing in front of her, and rest my hand on her hip. I look at her, making sure that she’s okay with me touching her, and then trace my eyes down the front of her body. Her tiny light blue bikini looks amazing against her light brown skin. She always thought her breasts were small, but they’re so perfect to me. They fill out the bikini top, showing some cleavage that makes my mouth water.

  I want to lick across her chest, and I have no difficulty picturing that as I look at her. I can practically taste the vanilla on her skin. I imagine my tongue leaving its mark on her and making her mine, branding her so no one could ever touch her again. Her stomach is perfectly flat, and on her right hip is a small pear shaped birthmark that I licked every time she and I would have sex.

  If she only knew what I want to do to her right now. If my guilt and self-control didn’t hold me back, I would take her right here on this pier. Not giving her a second to think when I rip off her jeans and bend her over to fuck her. But I reign in those thoughts, knowing I could never be like that with her. She deserves to be worshiped and loved thoroughly, not mauled by someone who loves her.

  I take my hand off her hip, knowing that the close contact with her is driving my mind into territory that we aren’t ready for, and take off my jeans. My hand fucking hurts from the deprivation of contact with her.

  I put on swimming trunks earlier, and I’m positive she can see the outline of my very hard arousal through the material. She takes off her boots, and her jeans are all that’s left. I see her eyes travel to the obvious bulge in my bathing suit, and love the gulping sound she makes. My whole body buzzes in hunger to watch her take off her clothes. I’d like for there to be nothing underneath those jeans, but I’ll take a bikini any day.

  This is the girl I’ve been dreaming about at night for years. She consumes my every waking thought and preoccupies every single dream. I wake up in the middle of the night with a rock hard cock, clutching the sheets hoping I’ll find the one person who can help me.

  She lights the darkness that I escape to when my ominous thoughts become unbearable, and she helps me smile and keep trying when all I want to do is give up. And in those moments in the middle of the night, when sweat clings to my body as if I’m on the brink of death and am dominated by a starvation for her touch, only she can elicit a satisfaction that no one else can.

  She doesn’t put on a show of taking off her pants like most girls would have if I had gone swimming with them, but she doesn’t need to, either. She comes to full height, and I can’t turn my eyes away from the small scrap of fabric that’s covering the exact place I want to be buried in.

  I know I need to find a way to distract us both from the sexual tension in the air, so I pick her up and throw her over my shoulder, laughing as she squeals. Running to the end of the pier, I jump into the water, making a big splash when we both hit the surface. I can’t even pretend that it was an accident that my hand squeezes her ass before we hit the water. I can’t stop thinking about that ass bouncing on the horse, so I had to cop a feel.

  When her head comes back up, she gasps and gives me a cute evil glare. I try to swim away from her, but her arms are quick and she gets me with a big splash. I turn my head and splash her back. She catches me off guard when she pulls herself onto my back and brings her arms over my head. The girl I love is half naked on my back, so that’s all I can think about when she scoops her hands and continually splashes water in my face.

  She’s good.

  I plunge myself under the water with her on my back, and she lets go after a few seconds of being submerged. She likes swimming, but she hates being under water for any length of time.

  I’m better.

  “You suck,” she says when I come back up for air. I laugh at her adorably angry face. She has no idea what she does to me. She has no idea how everything about her- her laugh, her smile, her angry face, her feistiness, her facial expressions- makes my heart clench in need and makes me fall for her even harder.

  “Come on, Pussy Cat! You know you love it.”

  She leans back and floats on her back. I swim up next to her and join her, grabbing her hand. The sky is a navy blue with splashes of orange from the setting sun. There’s this moment of peace that engulfs me as I looks at the sky with Josie floating next to me. The weights of the world- our relationship, Blake, and her dad’s passing- all slip away, and I know without any doubt that this is what life could be like with Josie by my side every day.

  We float and swim for another hour or so before getting out. The horses look antsy, so I let them off of the post to roam the vicinity. I know they won’t go far, so I’m not worried about them not being tied up. I walk to the trunk in front of the pier and grab a couple towels, the snacks I brought, a blanket, and a speaker. I throw Josie a towel, and try not to stare too long as she dries herself off. To take my mind off of it, I lay out the blanket on the ground and start opening all the containers that hold our food. It’s not much, just some peanut butter sandwiches, chips, fruit, and carrots, but I thought she might like a snack after the swim.

  “Did you make this?” Josie asks after she puts her jeans and tank top back on over her bathing suit. Can’t say I’m not disappointed that she didn’t stay in her bikini for the rest of the night, but I’ll take her company in any form.

  “Would you really believe me if I told you I did it all myself?” I ask smiling derisively as I turn on the Bluetooth on my iPhone so we can listen to the music on the speaker. She laughs under her breath, obviously coming to the conclusion that I didn’t make it.

  “Yeah I guess I wouldn’t.”

  “What? I did! It’s nothing fancy. Just peanut butter and jelly, Jos. I can make a sandwich.”

  “You always made your mom make food!”

  “I’m a brand new Seth, Pussy Cat. I think you’ll love me even more now,” I say spreading my arms wide so she gets a good look at me.

  She looks at me and cocks her head to the side, showing off her neck. I want to bury my face in that neck and lick and suck all over it. She looks introspective, and I can tell she’s analyzing what I’m saying. I want to be the best person for her, so hell yeah I’m going to show her I can be good enough.

  “Hmmm…,” she says simply, before grabbing a strawberry.

  The way her mouth covers the strawberry, sucking out the juices and then biting into it, is such a turn on that I have to resituate myself. But then red juice starts trickling down her mouth and onto her chin, and I don’t think I can hold myself back from touching her any longer. My hand seems to have a mind of its own, and reaches out to grab her chin. I look into her eyes, completely entranced by her beauty. I slide my finger down her chin and gather the juice. Sticking my finger into my mouth, I lick the liquid off and savor the sweet taste of the fruit and the fact that it was just on Josie’s skin.

  My eyes never leave hers and we seem to be in a daze as we look at each other. It feels like we’re both trying to communicate through this look. I want her to know that I still want her more than I have ever wanted anyone. I need her to know that I want her to be mine. I open my mouth so I can say it out loud, but she breaks eye contact with me and grabs my iPhone.

  “Remember when we would bring your old boom box and have our own dance party out here?” she asks, altering the energy in the air. I lean back on my arms and smile.

  “Yeah. You’re a terrible dancer.” She looks at me like she’s com
pletely appalled that I would tell her that and it makes me laugh.

  “You, Seth Montgomery, are not much better!” I cock my eyebrow at her and smile.

  “You and I both know that’s not true, pretty girl.” She rolls her eyes, in typical Josie fashion and bites into her sandwich.

  “Whatever… You going to Brooke and Brandon’s engagement party tomorrow?”

  Brandon had asked me last night to stop by the party since I was back, but I haven’t decided if I’m going to go.

  “You going?” I ask.

  “Of course I’m going.”

  “Then I’ll be there.” I’m not particularly looking forward to it since there’s a big chance Blake will be there and I will have to kick his ass, but if there is any opportunity for me to hang out with Josie, then I sure as hell am not going to pass up on that.

  “Thank you,” she says morosely. It doesn’t hit me until now that she may be laden with dread about going to the party because she’ll have to be around that prick. Who the fuck leaves someone like Josie for making a choice that she felt was the right thing to do?

  “It’ll be okay, Josie. I won’t let anyone hurt you,” I vow. There’s a small smile on her lips that shows she is doubtful that I will be able to protect her, and it fucking kills me.

  Maybe she’s right. When have I ever been able to protect her? I couldn’t protect her from being raped. I couldn’t protect her from Blake and his bullshit mind games. And I wasn’t here for her when her dad died. What reason does she have to trust me? I can’t even look at her without feeling like shit, so I clench my jaw and refuse to look in her direction. A pang that feels like a knife hits my throat, constantly stabbing me as a reminder that I’m worthless.

  As the sky darkens around us, so too does my mood. The chill in the night air is in sync with the growing coldness that I feel inside. I thought I could just try to be good enough for her, but it’s more than that. She can’t trust me, and that’s something that I can’t just fix. I can’t take back what I let happen to her, and that’s probably the reason she’s always pulling back from me. My chest tightens with regret and apprehension that I’ll never be able to elucidate the obvious connection that we have. That I’ll never be able to show her that we’re made for each other.

  She changes the song to Macklemore’s “Can’t Hold Us,” and I see her get up in my peripheral vision. I smile when I look up and find her dancing to the song and shaking her butt. She’s looking at me as she does the running man.

  “Come on, Sethy Poo! Dance with me!” she yells to me, closing her eyes and spinning in a circle. And just like that, Josie Sommers turns my whole depressing world, glutted with qualms and misery, into one of calmness and optimism. She’ll never understand the extent to which she can alter my life and reason for living.

  I laugh and get up to join her just like we did when we were kids. It was never about trying to impress anyone, it’s about having fun, letting loose, and revering the moment of feeling free. She frames her face with her hands and I shake my head at her silliness. I know exactly where this is going.

  “What? It’s good!” she says smiling. One of her favorite movies is Baby Mama, so she’s always quoting the movie, and that scene in particular. She keeps “vogueing” while I get my Chris Brown on (the dancing, not the beating part).

  We pretend that we’re experts in the field of dance, and dance until we’re completely out of breath. She’s laughing and smiling, and that’s exactly how I want Josie to be. I stand still for a moment and focus on her- hands on her knees, trying to shake her butt like the girls in the music videos. She laughs at herself and just throws her hands up, closing her eyes to dance to the music.

  She’s incredible… no one could ever come close the beauty and awe-inspiring personality that she has. She stops when the song changes to a slow rhythm. She looks at me, and then does this cute ass thing where she has a half smile tugging on her lips, averts her eyes, and turns her face downward and away from me.

  I hold out my arm, indicating that she should come and dance with me. She walks to me and I see her uncertainty, but I also see how happy she is in those beautiful eyes. The moonlight shining around her makes her look even more appealing and gorgeous to me. As soon as she gets close enough, I grab her and bring her flat against me. She has nowhere else to put her hands but behind my neck, and the feel of her soft hands on me sets my veins on fire.

  I love the way her eyes close with a satisfied smile dancing on her lips when I rest my hands right above her ass. I bring one hand up her back until I get a grip on her almost-dry hair, and a shiver trembles through her tiny body. At first I play with it lightly, but then surprise her when I wrap it around my hand and give it a good yank.

  I immediately bring my face to her exposed neck, delighting in the purring noises she’s making. My kitten likes when I pull her hair and kiss her neck. I run my nose up her throat and along her jaw. I slip my tongue out and taste the skin beneath her ear. It’s quick, but enough for me to get a small morsel of her. The way she’s breathing, shallow breaths with little moaning noises escaping her mouth, makes me feel like I need her closer. I press my hand harder against her back so my hips drive into her. I want her to feel every part of me that is reverberating with need for her.

  She breathes out roughly and opens her neck up more to me. I run my tongue up her throat and jaw this time, nipping at her skin as I go. My hand that is gripping her hair moves to her scalp to get a better hold on her and my other hand moves to cup her ass. She stands on her tip toes as I hold her to me with one of her hands tangled in my hair and the other exploring my tense arms, and I let out my own deep moan. There is nothing better than her sweet, delicate hands roving my body.

  My lips move to her ear and I graze my lips softly against her, eliciting another shudder from her.

  “You will never understand what you do to me,” I whisper to her. A small moan leaves her mouth, and I can feel her weakening slightly in my hold. I pull her ear into my mouth just how she likes, and bite it gently.

  “Seth…,” she calls to me breathily.

  “What do you want, pretty girl?” I ask huskily, bringing my mouth to her cheek. I kiss my way down to the side of her mouth, using my tongue slightly in the chaste kisses. Her mouth is parted, and I hear her trying to get a good breath. If she says stop, then I’ll stop, but I want more than anything for her to tell me she wants me to give her the world. “I’ll give you anything, Josie. I may have been gone for two years, but you still consume every part of me.”

  There’s a change in the atmosphere around us, and I feel and smell a storm coming quickly. I look up briefly to the sky and see clouds obscuring the once clear night. I look back down to Josie, and see her looking at me thoughtfully. I know she’ll fight this. She’ll come up with every reason to stop us from being together, because she doesn’t want to ruin the friendship that we have. My heart clenches painfully in my chest as she takes a step back from me.

  The skies open up and the rain starts pouring down on us. It doesn’t faze me. The only person deserving of my focus is the one who just stepped away from me.

  “I’m scared,” she says, needing to raise her voice to be heard over the pounding of the rain.

  “We’re all scared to reach for the stars, Josie,” I say, gradually stepping closer to her. “We don’t know if we’ll get burned or thrive when we get there. We don’t know if the whole fucking world will come crashing down on us… but, Pussy Cat? Who the fuck cares when it means a chance with the only person who knows you and can love you in unfathomable ways? ... So what do you want, Josie? No more holding back or hiding your feelings.”

  Her clothes and hair are soaked as she stares at me, mouth open while rain dances against her face. I see her inner conflict start to dispel and she starts closing the distance between us. I don’t need any more encouragement, and I find myself moving toward her with even more purpose. I grab her face with both of my hands as soon as she’s within range and bring m
y mouth to hers.

  There’s no holding back. There’s no worrying about menial things like our phones, the speaker, or the food, because nothing can compare to the caliber of this moment.

  My lips crush hers as I hold her to me, never wanting to let go. I bring her bottom lip between my teeth and suck it into my mouth, loving the taste of the rain against her velvety lips. I want to consume her. I want to show her I can’t live another second on this earth without her. She moans into my mouth and it drives me fucking crazy. Her hands are tangled in my hair gripping onto me as I lift her off her feet to get better access into her mouth.

  I bring my thumb to her chin and pull on it so she opens her mouth more, and she complies as if she’s the clay that I’m molding. My tongue seeks her mouth needing every bit of her as possible. She tastes like strawberries, and I know without any doubt that her taste will be in every dream I have from now until I die.

  I feel like I’ve been dying, spiraling into an abyss of nothingness, but with one kiss from Josie, I feel like I can breathe again. I feel whole again. I’m hungry for her. I’ve been starving without her next to me, and I need her to never let go. I grab her ass, jeans wet from the rain, and lift her up so she wraps her sexy legs around me. I hold onto her back with one hand and keep the other on her face, caressing her skin while I devour her.

  Her tongue clashes with mine, in a dance that soothes our fears and increases the passion that we harbor. As the rain increases, so do the movements between us. She rubs herself against me, and I know exactly what she needs. I know I can placate her cravings along with some she doesn’t even realize she has. Our mouths are slippery as we kiss, which makes us even more reckless and uninhibited while we try to get our fill of each other. The blood pumping in me is on fire as her hands become wilder and desperate.

  Our breathing is rough. Our hands frantic. Our lips greedy. And our hearts are booming vehemently in our chests.

  Suddenly, there’s a loud boom and cracking sound that startles us from our connection. My heart may be beating like crazy, but that boom was not internal, it’s the sky getting angrier. I have to get Josie back to the house before she gets hurt. Still holding her in my arms, I brush her soaked hair out of her face. She looks so content and happy, and her eyes are loaded with lust. The next roll of thunder is so boisterous that Josie jerks in in shock and wraps her arms harder around my neck.