Tall, Dork and Handsome

by Remy Richard

  Holden shook his head and pulled the dome off of the plate. The smell of mushrooms and butter floated into the room and Sabrina had to stifle a moan.

  Maybe she hadn’t done such a good job at covering it though because Holden looked up at her alertly. He stared at her a moment before answering. “Not fingerprints.”

  “Can’t be DNA. No way that would have come back fast enough,” Sabrina mused aloud.

  “Facial recognition software.”

  “Damn it,” she cursed softly. It seemed like every time she turned around there was another road block in her way. Conning was just too dangerous these days.

  Holden handed her a fork and strangely, kept one for himself. He took a big bite of pasta and chewed it slowly before sitting back and gesturing for her to eat. When she hesitated, he ran the hand not holding a fork through his hair. “It’s fine. You just watched me eat it. Do you think I would take a big bite of poison just to fool you?”

  “You could have taken the antidote or built up an immunity.”

  “You’ve watched The Princess Bride too many times,” he scoffed.

  Sabrina could feel her lips curving into a smile and fought it. “I wouldn’t have pegged you for a Princess Bride fan.”

  “Am I a human? Yes. Then I like The Princess Bride. Please eat.”

  He was so impatient with her but seemed to really care that she not get sick. He reached for a basket and flipped the napkin open to reveal a pile of buttery garlic bread. Sabrina couldn’t resist anymore and picked up her fork. She didn’t spare a thought on manners, but rather tucked in like she hadn’t seen food in a week.

  Holden smiled and handed her a piece of bread, which she barely made room for in her mouth before stuffing it in. He picked up his own fork and ate some of the pasta as well, managing to stay out of her way for the most part as she devoured the plate.

  When she started slowing down, he poured her a drink out of a closed soft drink can and then waited until she was done.

  She took a deep drink of cola and then managed to wrangle up her manners enough to use her napkin on her face and hands.

  “How do you feel?” he asked.

  “Stuffed and hardly poisoned at all.”

  “Okay, then I have some questions for you, if you’re ready to answer them.”

  Sabrina considered. She hadn’t been lying before, there was relatively little that she could tell him about the mysterious Plan B. He could ask whatever questions he wanted and it wouldn’t change that. She shrugged. “Shoot.”

  “So you’ve told me what Plan B is. What was Plan A?”

  Hmmm, she hadn’t expected that one. She briefly ran through what she knew in her head. Nothing that seemed more incriminating than what he already knew, so she was safe to spill. “Honestly, I didn’t hook up with these guys until about three weeks ago. A friend of mine found out about the job and that they needed a daisy.” He looked confused, so she explained, “A woman to sweet talk you out of you what you won’t give up willingly.”

  “Ahh. I see.” His whole demeanor said that he didn’t think it was possible, but he was willing to placate her. She thought about proving him wrong and then waved away the idea. Pride had no place in negotiations.

  “Anyway, they told me what we were trying to get from you. They had all the schematics of your house, your schedule, your associates, details of the project…this wasn’t some bad idea someone had one day. They’ve been working on this for at least a few months.”

  She thought that the idea that men had been watching him for months would have shaken him but he only motioned for her to continue.

  “Apparently they tried to hack into your system and get the program. That’s when they discovered that you had to be on the premises to access the system. So then they tried the brute force attempt a couple of times and tried to break in here. But you know how that went.” She saluted him with her glass and took a sip.

  “So they called me in. I took what they did at face value—stupid mistake obviously. And I did my own research to try to find out what kind of girl you’d go for so that I could get in here. The last time I went to meet up with them, they were getting impatient. I tried to explain that there was no point in moving until you’d finished the algorithm and it didn’t seem like you had done that yet to me, but they wouldn’t listen. I overheard them talking about Plan B and taking your sister and I hightailed it out of there. Then I made the ridiculous decision to try to speed up this operation and here we are.” She spread her arms wide to take in the room where she had been held captive.

  Holden seemed to be processing all that she had said so she helped herself to another slice of garlic bread and settled in for questions. They came sooner than she thought they would.

  “So your job as the daisy would be what? To seduce me into giving you the program?” He laughed in disbelief.

  “You don’t think I could do it?” Sabrina sat up straight in her chair and put her feet on the ground. She was damn good at her job—present circumstances excluded—and she wasn’t going to let him disparage her.

  He made a calm down motion with his hands. “I’m not saying you in particular. I just don’t really bring home random women. You said as much in your little report earlier. So how did you plan to get in here?”

  She crossed her legs and pretended to examine her fingernails while she let him stew. “Men are all alike. You think you’re so infallible. Obviously you’re not the type to jump in bed with a woman. You believe in love and all that crap.”

  “You found this out in all of your internet research, did you?” he asked skeptically.

  “No, I know that from spending three minutes in a room with you. You’re so worried about my safety, my comfort, despite the fact that I broke into your home. You have the same friends from when you were five, for God’s sake. Plus, I did find a picture of you at ComicCon about six years ago.” She shrugged as if that explained it all.

  “So that’s it. You’d make me fall in love with you? That seems a little ambitious…not to mention far-fetched.”

  “Well, I’d make you fall in love with me and then I’d screw your brains out so that you’d let me have the run of the house. The simplest plans are usually the best.”

  She watched in confusion as Holden pulled back from her. It wasn’t until that moment that she realized that throughout their entire conversation, the recitation of her crimes past and present, he had never once worn an expression of distaste, until now.

  “So you’re a prostitute.”

  “What?” Sabrina jumped out of her chair and faced him with her hands on her hips. “How dare you?”

  “You’re the one who said it. A plus B equals C. A woman who has sex with a man for money is a prostitute.” He was on his feet too now, facing her down.

  “I wouldn’t need to have sex with you, honey. I was just thinking about throwing it in for free because you’re cute in a homebody sort of way. But you can forget it now!”

  “Ha! You couldn’t pay me to take it!” he hollered back at her.

  Sabrina took a deep breath to pull herself together. This wasn’t gaining either of them anything. She didn’t want to give him the impression that he had hurt her feelings though. She turned her back on him and tried to gather the reins of her loosened temper.

  “Sabrina…” His voice was low and contrite.

  She didn’t want his apology, she wanted action. He had so casually asserted that he wouldn’t want her. Was he so far above her then? That he couldn’t even fathom an instance in which he would desire her? She didn’t happen to believe that was true.

  She turned back around to face him with a smile that she hoped was seductive. “I don’t want to fight about this.”

  Holden ran his hand through his hair and gave her a small smile. “I don’t want to fight with you either. I’m sorry. I was totally out of line.”

  His words were like a balm to her pride. But her ego was still smarting. She needed a way to get a little of her own back
. He thought she was so completely resistible? Well, they’d see about that.

  She turned so that she was fully facing him and took the two steps needed to bring them together. Without her realizing it, they had grown fairly close while yelling at each other, almost within arm’s reach. She closed that gap and carefully put her arms around his neck. He let her pull him closer and align her body with his in a way that would have been scandalous if they hadn’t been wearing clothes. Slowly, he slid his arms around her to rest at the small of her back. Not pulling on her, but not pushing her away either.

  Sabrina laid her head down on his chest and took in a deep breath that was scented by the last remnants of his cologne and his own deeply pleasing scent. It was hard to keep her head on straight with something so yummy literally in her face but she gave it her best effort.

  “I’m sorry too, and I forgive you. Can you forgive me?” she asked in a quiet voice so that he had to lean down to hear her.

  When she sensed that he was near enough, she tilted her head back so that they were looking into each other’s eyes. With a growing sense of satisfaction, she felt his hands tighten on her back, pulling her closer by an inch. She let her breath rush out a bit faster and heavier than normal, knowing that he could feel it on his face and lips. She hid a wince at the memory that she’d just had garlic bread.

  He didn’t seem to be complaining though. Rather, he watched her face with a kind of absorbed fascination. At least that’s what it seemed like to Sabrina. She made a mental note to keep her perspective around this guy. When he looked at her like that, it made her feel like he was seeing all the way inside of her. Past the aliases and the mistakes and the admittedly poor decision making skills. She tried to convince herself that was the last thing she wanted.

  To take her mind off of her thoughts, she rushed her fences. In a flurry of movement, she stood up on her tiptoes and brushed her mouth against his. Softly at first, like she had never touched lips with a man before, then more firmly as she supposedly worked up the courage. At least that was what he was supposed to think.

  She hadn’t been bullshitting him about her research. She had taken a very deep look into his seemingly nonexistent dating habits and fleeting sexual proclivities. She’d only managed to find mentions of a few equally geeky girlfriends in his early career. Since he’d gained money and notoriety not so much.

  Taking all of that into account, she’d decided that a shy, geeky girl would be the perfect person to win his heart. Virginal and sweet, she had planned to meet cute him at the grocery store and let him help her pick out melons. He’d take her to dinner and she’d pretend to be fascinated with his mental prowess all the while talking about her work with kids with cleft palates in Malaysia or wherever. She planned that it would take a week for him to get her into bed and therefore into his house.

  She brought herself back into the present and used her tongue to tickle his lips, shyly demanding entrance. Obligingly he opened for her and passively allowed her to slide her tongue against his. Funny, but he didn’t taste like garlic. His mouth was warm and musky, his tongue firm and strong when he deigned to brush it against hers in reaction.

  She heard a faint moan and belatedly registered that it was hers. She could feel the beginnings of arousal pulsing through her, making her muscles more relaxed and her head fall back. Which would have been a great position, if he had taken the hint and become the aggressor. But he didn’t.

  Instead his lips fell away from hers. At least he was breathing as hard as she was. Unfortunately that was the only sign that he had enjoyed the kiss at all. After waiting a few seconds to make sure that she was steady, he gently stepped away from her, the fingers on one hand brushing against her skin under her shirt for a brief second. She shivered in reaction and then glared up at him.

  “I stand corrected, you probably could con me into sleeping with you,” he said with such measured politeness that she wanted to kick his shin. For him to admit defeat when they both knew that he hadn’t encouraged or responded to her one bit was the most aggravating part of the whole debacle.

  Sabrina forced herself to take a few steps away from him and trail her fingers along the back of her vacated chair. “So you are gay.”

  He laughed roughly, shaking his head. “If you think you’re going to goad me into doing something unwise, then you’ve got the wrong guy.”

  “Clearly.” She drew out the word so that it implied she still didn’t believe him, ready for a fight.

  It seemed he wouldn’t be giving her one though. Carefully, he side-stepped the water glass that was still lying on her floor and opened the door. Right before he shut it behind him, he turned around to address her. “You should get some sleep. You have a long day of cooperating with us tomorrow.”

  The door closed swiftly behind him before she could retort and she could hear the electronic lock being engaged.

  Sabrina wanted to scream in frustration, but her throat had taken enough abuse for one day. She settled for kicking the leg of her chair. Not as satisfying as kicking his leg, but it seemed that she was destined to go unsatisfied that day anyway.

  ***

  Mike was three beers down and still had three to go on his six pack when his cell phone rang. He took his time searching for it amongst the fast food trash and empty cans that littered his back deck. He had been taking advantage of one of Portland’s beautiful summer evenings and mentally counting the money he was going to make on setting up Sabrina’s latest job. Hopefully this phone call would be someone else needing his unique set of skills for a premium price. Or even a low price. A man in his position couldn’t afford to be picky.

  “Hello?” he said, answering the call.

  “Son of a bitch.”

  “Mom?”

  “It’s Stiles, you dumbass, and we’ve got a problem,” he said, in a voice that made Mike’s spine straighten up. Stiles was not a nice guy on his best day. Unfortunately Mike had never seen Stiles even on a good day.

  “What kind of problem? You need more people?” Mike tried not to sound too hopeful as he mentally went through his rolodex. He had some good friends who were in town and not currently working on anything so setting him up with added help shouldn’t be too difficult.

  “I’d just be happy to see the person you already brought to me,” Stiles growled.

  “What are you talking about? I was there for your first meet with Sabrina. You said she was good to go,” Mike pointed out in confusion.

  “We had a meet set-up for this evening, but your girl didn’t show.” Stiles didn’t say anything else; he let the dire implications speak for themselves.

  “Whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down. Sabrina wouldn’t leave you hanging like that. She’s a professional. Tell me what happened from the beginning,” he said, starting to sweat beneath his t-shirt.

  “Stop wasting my time!” Stiles hollered into the phone. Mike had to pull his cell away to maintain what was left of his hearing.

  “Look you’re going to have to give me more information if you want me to track her down. Are you sure she knew where the meet was?” Mike asked.

  “Your girl knew exactly where and when. She was late this morning, so me and the rest of the guys got started on a Plan B that she’s not a part of. After an hour of her not showing, we’re starting to get antsy. Another hour goes by and the guys are convinced that she’d double crossed us. Sold our info and hit the road. I tell them, ‘no way would my buddy Mike give me a dumb bitch’. So you better start telling me where this woman is,” Stiles finished.

  “I appreciate your faith in me. It’s touching really, but I am one hundred percent certain that Sabrina didn’t sell your intel. She doesn’t even have those kind of contacts, she’d have to come through me. She does what I tell her and when. Don’t worry about that,” Mike soothed.

  Stiles let out a harsh laugh, somewhat calmed. “Is there a money back guarantee on that?”

  “Since you haven’t paid me anything yet, sure,” Mike joked before turni
ng serious. “I know the deal. If she doesn’t deliver then neither of us gets paid. Same as always. And you know exactly why I can’t afford that right now. Do you really think I’d give you someone I wasn’t sure of?”

  “Find her, Mike. Now.” Stiles relented somewhat. “In the meantime, we’re moving forward with Plan B, which we don’t need a daisy for. If we pull this off, then your girl’s out and so are you. That’s the punishment for missing the meeting. Deal?”

  “Sure, fine,” Mike said quickly, wishing that he had the leverage to refuse. Stiles wasn’t someone he wanted to get tangled up with though.

  “What’s Plan B anyway?” he asked.

  “Forget it,” Stiles growled. “You concentrate on finding the girl.”

  “Don’t worry, I’m on it,” Mike said before he realized that Stiles had already hung up on him.

  Finally able to show his anger, he threw his cell across the room where it hit the back of the couch and fell onto the cushions. The motion was somewhat therapeutic but not terrible helpful.

  He honestly had no idea where to even start looking for Sabrina. He had meant what he said to Stiles: he couldn’t imagine a situation in which Sabrina would double-cross him. He’d taken care of her for years, there was no way she would leave him in the lurch. Which meant that something had gone wrong. But what? Once he figured that out he would be much closer to answering the second, and more important, question.

  Where the hell was she?

  Chapter Five

  Were tomatoes or avocados better for the skin? Lila surveyed her mud mask options. She had a tomato and basil mask to tighten the pores, a cucumber and mint mask to release her inner radiance and a carrot and ginseng mask to control acne. She was one crouton away from a salad.

  Definitely something to release her radiance. It seemed like it was buried pretty deep these days. She shivered as she smoothed the first cool glop of mask on her face. Lila wasn’t sure if these things worked but that wasn’t why she wore them anyway. The magic of at home facials was that they suddenly turned painting-her-fingernails-in-front-of-the-tv-home-alone-on-a-Friday-night into a Spa-Night. Capital S. Capital N.