“Just go with me,” he whispered in my ear before pulling me even closer and doing it again. This time it was more pleasant but I didn’t mind when the kiss ended and I could take a breath again.
“Sorry to interrupt your little romancing here, Runt but Hugh and I’ve been looking for you everywhere.”
Sean stood there, muscular arms folded. There was a smirk on his full lips but his dark eyes were cold.
“I guess you found me, then. Thanks, Ranalt, that was fun. Catch ya some other time, darlin’.” Liam winked and tried to grin like he was some Casanova caught ravishing the town virgin. But he couldn’t quite pull it off.
I sensed Liam didn’t want to go with his brother. But before I could recover from my surprise and say something, he and Sean were halfway down the street. I didn’t know what to think. I wandered down the sidewalk until I found myself at the Ice King where I ordered the first thing I saw on the menu, a cherry limeade. I don’t like cherry limeade but I numbly sipped at it and continued to walk down Main Street, trying to make sense of what happened and Liam’s mysterious words.
I don’t know what it was that caught my attention. Probably the noises. The soft thuds. The grunts. I stopped. What I saw made the drink fall from my suddenly nerveless hand. The lid flew off and cold liquid splashed my ankles. I never noticed until hours later the cherry-red stains on my skin and my new beige sandals.
In the alley between the Carrick County Real Estate Board office and the Shamrock Tavern, Sean was beating up an unresisting Liam while Hugh watched.
I should have done something.
I should have screamed, pulled out my cell and called 9-1-1, run for help.
I did run. All the way back to the library where I hid between the stacks. Minutes before closing time, I grabbed a few random books and checked them out. Momma would wonder why I went to the library and came home empty-handed.
It still shames me to think I did nothing to help poor Liam.
****
I didn’t eat much supper that night. I was pretty quiet but nobody noticed. My parents and Lacey were wrapped up in their own thoughts, I guess. Thinking of Liam and the beating he took—maybe because of me—kept me awake for awhile but eventually I fell into a troubled sleep.
At some point my own tossing and turning woke me. I rolled over and noticed Lacey’s bed was empty, the sheets all bunched up like she just kicked them off. There was no light on in the bathroom we shared either and her fuchsia dressing gown was exactly where she left it on the floor.
The night was moonless but peppered with so many stars it was bright enough. That’s how I was able to see Lacey and a man sneak into the barn. From my vantage point at the upstairs window, it looked like Colin.
Jealousy seared me. I told myself for my own peace of mind, I had to be sure the guy Lacey was meeting wasn’t Colin.
I scooped her robe off the floor and pulled it on then slid my feet into my ballerina-style slippers. Carefully, I crept down the steep backstairs. Twist was snoozing on his doggie cushion in the kitchen. As I walked by, he raised his head and looked at me inquiringly.
“Stay there, Twist,” I ordered and gave him a pat.
He obediently put his head between his paws and closed his eyes.
I headed to the barn. What I ended up seeing there hadn’t crossed my mind at all. I mean, it’s a barn! It’s got cattle and hay and tools inside and it smells, well, like a barn. Not my idea of a place for a romantic rendezvous.
They lay on one of Momma’s old tattered quilts in a pile of hay. The few milk cows we kept in the barn must’ve been asleep in their stalls because they weren’t lowing. So I could easily hear the moans and kissing sounds. Two battered old lanterns set on a bench nearby gave off plenty of light for me to see them grinding together. They were still half-dressed, him in his jeans and her in pajama bottoms. He had his mouth on my sister’s bare breast and she had her hands wound in his glossy black hair and the glow of golden light on his rippling muscles made me feel weak.
I turned away, burning with raw envy. Despite all common sense, even despite Colin, I longed to be the one under Rory Phelan, instead of Lacey.
Time passed while I struggled with that.
When a thudding noise added to the other sounds, I peeked around the door again.
Now they were naked. Her long legs hugged his waist and her arms encircled his back. Even in the dim light, I could see the scores her nails left on his skin. The thud-thud noise was him rhythmically banging her against the rough wallboards.
I must have made some sound or maybe he just sensed me, hidden in the shadows. Rory looked in my direction. And he smiled.
Like a scared little rabbit, I sprinted away as quickly as I could. Twist, deep in some doggie dream, never heard me when I entered the house. I didn’t stop running until I was in my own bed with the sheet wrapped around me. I don’t know when Lacey sneaked back; I was already asleep and dreaming by that time.
In my dream, it wasn’t Rory and Lacey on the quilt in the hay, it was Colin and me. When the thud-thud part came up and he was inside me, I gazed into his eyes. They were wide, unblinking and opaque, like an animal’s. He smiled and sank his teeth into my throat.
I woke up with Lacey shaking me. She wasn’t gentle.
“Ranalt, wake up. You’re dreaming!”
“Ok, ok, I’m awake. Jeez.” I pushed her away and rubbed my gritty eyes. “Do you have to shake me like a kid with a present on Christmas Eve?”
“You wouldn’t wake up. You kept moaning like you were having some kind of hot sexy dream.” She sat on the edge of my bed. “Were you?”
“No, I wasn’t!” I snapped, suddenly aware of a wet ache between my legs. “It was a nightmare. What’s this?” I reached up and plucked something out of her tresses. “You’ve got hay in your hair.”
“No, I don’t!” She tried to get up but I grabbed her sleeve. The wide-necked pajama top slid down, revealing a mouth-shaped bruise on her shoulder and another at the base of her neck.
“I saw you last night, going into the barn. You were with Rory Phelan,” I accused.
Lacey sucked in her breath. “Don’t tell Daddy. Please. Ranalt, I’m mad for Rory. I think I’m in love with him.” She pulled away from my grip and went to the mirror that hung on the closet door. With a wondering look on her face, Lacey touched the bite-marks. Then she pulled down the thin cotton pants to reveal two more, on her hip and inner thigh.
“He hurt you.”
“And I hurt him. He was wild, Ranalt. So was I.”
I remembered the nail marks on Rory’s back.
Lacey pulled up her pants and ambled toward me. “The way he makes me feel... Oh, you’d never understand. Did you see that mark on my thigh? That’s when he went down—”
I winced and covered my ears.
She laughed and grabbed my wrists, yanking my hands away. “I know you’re not a virgin so don’t act like one, little sister. You can have Colin, if you can get him, that is. Rory’s much better at lovin’.”
That hurt me as she knew it would. I didn’t know she had slept with Colin when they dated two years ago.
“I’ll tell—”
“No, you won’t. You know what’ll happen if you do.”
I knew. Total catastrophe.
She went back to the mirror and ruffled through her hair, looking for bits of hay. “If you so much as hint to Momma or Daddy that I’m seeing Rory, I’ll tell Colin in front of everyone you pant after him like a lovesick schoolgirl. You know he hates to be embarrassed in public. Mmmm, smell that? Momma’s cooking eggs and maple-cured bacon for breakfast. I’m starving after my long, hard night.”
Giving me a superior look, Lacey tied on her robe and sauntered out of the room.
****
A few days later I was babysitting Juniper while Colin was in town at a meeting with his supplier. After reading two Dr. Seuss stories and getting her a glass of water, she had finally fallen asleep.
I flipped though
the TV channels, looking for something to watch, finally settling on a medical drama. When the brass clock on the stone mantel chimed the half hour, I realized it was 8:30 and Colin should’ve been back by now. I had the phone in my hand when I heard him walk into the kitchen.
“Sorry I’m late,” he said. “The meeting ran a little longer than I expected and I wanted to pick up something before the store closed.”
“No problem.” What I really wanted to say was, “You worried me.” Ever since Patrick Phelan’s visit, I’d felt uneasy, like some balance had been disturbed.
“Would you like some wine?”
“I’d love some.”
It was a ritual between us, having a glass of wine on those nights I babysat Juniper. Colin handed me a glass and settled down beside me on the chesterfield.
“Is Junie sleeping?”
“Like an angel.” For a moment I admired the rich ruby glow in the faceted crystal before taking a sip. He always served the wine in his mother’s Waterford crystal. That made me feel special.
“What’s happening?” He meant the show.
“Well, that doctor is having an affair with a patient and that woman just discovered she’s pregnant but her husband is supposedly sterile. And that nurse is a drug addict who’s been stealing morphine from the hospital. She just found a blackmail note in her purse.”
“Oh ho. Exciting stuff.”
We looked at each other and grinned.
When the show ended, Colin turned off the television and looked at me, his eyes shining. “This is why I was late.” He pulled a small blue box from his pocket and gave it to me.
Inside was a heart-shaped silver locket engraved with a curly “R.”
“Colin!” I gasped. “It’s beautiful.”
“Open it.”
The locket held a picture of Juniper, snapped in the act of laughing.
“I love it, Colin. Thank you.”
“No, thank you.”
As I clasped on the necklace, he added, “I planned to wait until your birthday in September to give it to you. But as I was driving home, I thought, why wait? You’ve been so good, Ranalt, to both of us. Especially since Dad died. I just wanted to show my appreciation.” He smiled. “Junie helped me pick it out at Goldberg Jewellers. She practically ordered me to put that picture of herself in the locket. She is really attached to you.”
“I’m really attached to her.” I ran my fingers gently over the locket. It was cool in my hand.
Colin took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Do you think you could form an equally strong attachment to Junie’s father?”
My heart leapt. I touched his face, feeling the slight bristle on his chin, the softness of his lips. “I already have, Colin.”
We kissed and it was everything I had dreamed of, sweet and deep and tender. When it ended, we leaned into each other, our heads touching. I could have stayed in his arms forever.
“I’ve been wanting to do that for awhile,” he whispered.
“Me, too,” I whispered back.
“And this.” His hand slid up under my shirt and cupped my breast. I felt my nipple harden.
“Anything else?” I asked breathlessly.
He smiled, mischief in his eyes. “Oh yes.”
Then we heard Juniper’s voice from down the hall. “Ranalt, Ranalt, where are you? I want another drink of water.”
That was a mood-killer. We snapped back to reality.
“I’ll go to her,” Colin said.
I think we both felt a little awkward. I told him I should be getting on home anyway. We kissed again before he went to the kitchen for Juniper’s water. It was all right. Our time would come.
As I bicycled home, I hummed the Hallelujah chorus. I felt unbelievably happy, right to the point I spotted something in the ditch by our driveway. Curious, I left my bike on the road and went to investigate. The shape lay on its side, toward the house. I wrinkled my nose. It smelled like spoiled raw meat. As I got a little closer, I saw the mangled torso and above it, a red collar.
The dead thing in the ditch was Twist.
When I finished throwing up, I got back on my bike, took a moment to blink the tears out of my eyes and went to get Daddy.
****
It wasn’t just poor Twist. In the morning Daddy found the gate to the north pasture open and a half-dozen dead cattle. Eviscerated, just like before. This time there was no argument between my parents on the verandah. That night he went to the office upstairs and brought down a gun I’d never seen before. And despite Momma’s pleas to not go out by himself, to phone Colin, to phone Don Perkins, to phone anybody, he shook off her clinging hands and left to patrol his land.
Lacey was white-faced. I’m sure so was I.
Finally Lacey said, “Momma, Daddy will be okay. I know it.”
I echoed her.
Momma just looked at us. Then she went upstairs and we heard the bedroom door slam.
I left three messages but Colin didn’t phone back. I found out later Juniper had run a fever and he’d taken her to the hospital. He was there all night and most of the morning.
After the sun rose and Daddy still hadn’t returned, Momma started calling. Don Perkins and the police chief Charlie Slater and some others came over to search. Don wouldn’t let any of us women leave the house to go with them. I seethed silently while Lacey and I helped Momma with busy work, making coffee and baking muffins for everyone when they came back. I thought Daddy was just taking his time getting home to delay another argument with her.
I don’t know who found his body—the gun still in his hand—crumpled in a heap near three gutted cows. There wasn’t a mark on him. I think it relieved Don a bit to be able to tell us that at least. Lacey ran upstairs. I fell into the nearest chair, frozen. Momma began mechanically serving coffee and muffins to people who didn’t want anything but took the food just the same, for her sake. She was still dry-eyed when the ambulance came and took Daddy’s body away.
I was numbly collecting the empty coffee cups and used serviettes from the verandah when I saw Momma and Don together at the corner of the house. When he mentioned Lacey and me, I stopped to listen.
“—your girls. Don’t worry about the legal stuff, Charlie said he’ll deal with it himself. There won’t be an inquiry. You know I’m real sorry, Sheila but someone should’ve said something when this-all started,” Don said.
“I told Joe that.” She sounded defensive. “But you know him; he thought he could handle it himself. He made me promise. Stubborn Irishman. And now he’s gone.” She burst into tears. Don awkwardly patted her shoulder.
I took the tray and went into the kitchen, sad, angry, and mystified.
Momma had to micromanage every detail from the flowers in the church to the clothes we wore to the funeral. She wanted us to wear black dresses but those are hard to find in Westmeath unless you want designer cocktail gown knock-offs. So she had to settle for navy blue dresses and black sandals. My sister and I said nothing. We knew she needed to keep herself occupied.
None of us talked about our grief. What should have brought us together, didn’t. All the secrets kept us apart. When I heard Lacey’s soft sobs one night, I didn’t go to her. If she heard my tears, she didn’t come to me. I could’ve cried in Colin’s arms but with Juniper around, that was impossible. She’d be scared and upset if she saw and that was the last thing I wanted.
It looked like half of Carrick County came to the funeral. Daddy and Momma had lived all their lives in one place; they knew a lot of people. When Patrick and Mary Phelan and their boys came to pay their respects, there were some angry murmurs but Father Kennedy hushed them up.
Momma icily accepted their sympathy. She wasn’t the type to make a scene in public. Lacey and I followed her lead. Sean and Hugh hastily mumbled something that sounded like “sorry for your loss” and got away as quickly as possible. Rory and Lacey acted like strangers, as if that night in the barn—and probably others—had never happened. Liam mumbled as
badly as his brothers but he looked sad and I thought he held my hand a fraction longer than was necessary.
Patrick Phelan waited a week-and-a-half before coming by the house. Lacey was at work and Momma was upstairs lying down. I lounged on the swing with an Agatha Christie paperback from the library and a tall glass of iced root beer on the railing. Despite the heat, the old man looked cool and comfortable in his light gray suit. To my annoyance, there wasn’t a bead of sweat on his forehead.
I took a great deal of pleasure in telling him he was too late. Momma had already sold the farm.
Patrick appeared taken back by the lie but recovered quickly. “Are you sure the deal has been closed? Tell her I will double whatever the other buyer is offering.”
I shook my head, trying hard not to look triumphant. “You’re too late, Mr. Phelan,” I repeated. “It’s been finalized. The property is sold.”
Patrick’s eyes narrowed and something dark peered out of them. I caught my breath and clutched my book. Like a wad of paper would protect me. But the darkness was gone as fast as it came.
“Well then, that is indeed unfortunate,” the old man said. “May I ask who is the buyer?” he inquired in a soft voice.
I should’ve told him I didn’t know. Or that it was some company in Toronto. Or even that the new owner wanted to stay anonymous.
“Colin Sweeney.” As soon as the words left my lips I knew I’d made a mistake.
“Brian Sweeney’s lad. Well, now.” Patrick’s face was bland. “I’ll let you get back to your reading. Give your mother my regards, please. Good day to you, Ranalt.”
“Good day, Mr. Phelan,” I said. My heart banged hard inside my chest until the big black car finally disappeared from sight.
I didn’t mention Patrick Phelan’s visit to my mother. I knew it would upset her. And I ignored my own growing unease that this wasn’t the end.
I had an interview in town a few weeks later for a receptionist job. The pay was minimal and the hours part-time but I knew I couldn’t just lounge around the house forever. The soapmaking business was basically pin money and I refused to let Colin pay me for babysitting. I had to get a real job or go to college. And school would take me away from Colin and Juniper.
Hauntings in the Garden, Volume One Page 12