by Laure Eve
‘Do you think I got Summer into trouble?’ I asked him in a low voice.
‘Perhaps.’ He had his eyes shut and his ankles crossed. ‘She can handle it.’ One eye opened a crack. ‘She likes you. Don’t worry.’
I shifted, pleased and anxious. ‘I shouldn’t have been there. It’s not my business.’
‘You are their friend. You are concerned. Sometimes they forget that other people are in their lives. Sometimes deliberately, I think.’
I gazed at him, trying to work out what he was thinking. ‘What was all that about, in there?’
‘Thalia.’
‘And Marcus.’
He was silent for a moment, maybe weighing up how much to tell me. ‘What do your school rumours say of it, then?’
‘I heard …’ I hesitated. ‘He’s obsessed with her. Dangerously?’
He shrugged.
‘You’ve known the Graces most of your life, right?’
‘All,’ he said firmly. ‘All my life.’
‘So you must know Marcus.’
‘I do.’
‘Is he dangerous?’
‘Are people in love dangerous? Yes, then.’
‘But would he …’ I tailed off.
‘I believe he’s changed recently,’ he said. ‘That’s what you mean to ask, right? He was always sweet, if a little anxious. Now he’s … angry. Desperate.’
‘What do you think they’ll do?’
‘Nothing.’ Wolf propped himself up on an elbow. His stomach muscles twisted. I tried not to look. ‘They will act as if nothing happened.’
‘Why?’
‘Because that’s the Grace way. Image is everything.’
‘Can’t they …’ I hesitated. ‘Can’t they do something? To make him go away?’
Wolf was silent.
‘You know what I mean,’ I said. ‘Right?’
‘No. Explain.’ But he did know. He was testing me. You didn’t hang out with the Graces all your life without knowing that, of all things, about them.
I shrugged. ‘Can’t they do some magic?’
‘You believe in that, do you?’
‘Yes,’ I said, without hesitation. Another test. ‘Don’t you?’
He lay back down, closed his eyes.
After a moment, his voice came again.
‘So which one are you in love with?’
‘Excuse me?’
‘Which one?’ he repeated. ‘You must be in love with one of them. You hang around like a dog hoping for scraps.’
‘Wow,’ I said, trying to sound amused.
‘I don’t mean to offend you. It’s the same for me. I have no reason to keep coming back to this house.’ He paused. ‘No reason except one.’
We stared out across the garden together. I felt closer to him again.
‘Which one are you in love with?’ I asked.
Wolf’s mouth curled into a vague smile.
‘We love just one, but we love them all as well,’ he said. ‘The Graces. We want to be them, and love them, and for them to love us. It’s a curse. Don’t you see? The Grace curse.’
He fell silent. The air was still. I didn’t want to leave, but neither did I know what to do, so I copied Wolf, lying down on the grass and letting the sun push me gently into the ground, hazing up my senses.
‘Wolf,’ I said, after a while.
He grunted.
‘What if we broke the curse?’
A buzzing bee wound its way through the quiet.
‘How?’ he said.
I didn’t reply.
‘With magic,’ he continued tonelessly, and I still couldn’t tell what he thought about it at all.
‘No, with scissors. Yes, with magic.’
‘Have you done magic before?’
‘I …’ I hesitated. ‘I’ve done some with Summer, recently. And I’ve been reading up on it.’
He regarded me. ‘So you know how to break a curse?’
‘Well … not exactly. Do you?’
He was silent.
I nodded towards the house. ‘But we could find out.’
Wolf sighed. ‘You are crazy.’
‘Let’s at least try,’ I urged, my mind racing, alive, shouting yes, yes. This was what we were supposed to do, surely. This was the way I would prove myself to them.
‘You think generations of Graces haven’t tried before? There is no point in even trying to try.’
‘Oh come on,’ I scoffed. ‘You think the human race would advance if people just decided not to try where others had failed before? Just because it’s not been done doesn’t mean it can’t be. What if …’
His eyes were on me.
‘What if it needs outsiders?’ I finished. ‘Maybe it’s always been Graces who tried, but the curse can’t be broken by a Grace alone. You know what they’re like – they don’t talk about that kind of thing outside the family. I bet they’ve never even thought of asking a non-Grace for help. What if that was all it took?’
He was wavering. I could see it in every line of his body.
I gave him one last push. ‘They’d be free to be with whoever they wanted. All of them. Wouldn’t that be worth it?’
I think I actually saw the moment he made the decision. Maybe he was thinking about the one he secretly loved. I wondered which it was – Thalia or Summer. I couldn’t decide. He was very good. He gave nothing away around either of them.
‘What do you propose?’ he said.
*
We made our way back into the house. Warm to cool, bleached to dim.
Wolf peered into the kitchen.
‘Esther and Gwydion are not there,’ he reported, and I felt my shoulders go down. ‘I think they must be in their wing of the house.’
I peered around. ‘Well, let’s avoid that area. I don’t want to make them any angrier.’
‘Thalia has books in her bedroom. We could start there.’
I must have looked doubtful because he shook his head at my face.
‘She’s not here. She’s staying at the house of a family friend tonight. Even so, it’s no problem. I’m in there all the time.’
Still, I hesitated. It was one thing to contemplate exploring alone, but now Wolf would be there, it felt like another test of loyalty. He went to the bottom of the stairs, looking back at me expectantly, his body cocked forward like an eager puppy.
I couldn’t help it – I laughed.
‘Oh ho,’ he said. ‘Now she laughs at me. She with the plan. Are you scared?’
I thought of Fenrin. His trembling anger. Each Grace alone with their private pain, unable to break out of the secrets they had all locked themselves into. I knew something of that, and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.
‘Nope,’ I said. ‘Let’s go.’
We made it to the first floor, treading as softly as we could. Summer’s bedroom door was firmly closed, and I couldn’t hear anything from the outside.
Wolf pushed on the door to Thalia’s room, and it opened without a squeak. He went straight to her bookcase, running his fingers along the spines, but I stood in the doorway, uncertain.
‘Haven’t you been in her room before?’ he said, glancing up.
I shrugged. I’d been in Summer’s and Fenrin’s, but Thalia had never invited me into hers.
‘Come in and shut the door.’ He went back to the spines, his lips moving as he read off the titles to himself. I did as he asked, allowing my eyes the luxury of wandering over Thalia’s things unchecked. It was a beautiful, poised girl’s bedroom, filled with carefully chosen, well-placed objects. On the fireplace, stones sat in an earthenware bowl, and beside that was a thick glass jar filled, on closer inspection, with salt. A delicate-looking knife with pearlescent strips set into the handle had been pushed all the way to the hilt inside, nestling among the grains.
I’d have given anything to have a study desk like hers. Or at all. The wood had been painted the palest of greens. The top was covered in clay pots filled with various plants, interspersed with
fat candlesticks and wooden tea-light holders. I could imagine sitting at it and feeling like I had access to the secrets of nature. Like I was a witch through pure atmospheric osmosis.
Was Thalia the most powerful Grace? She went to great lengths to be unknowable. She would forever dance out of your reach to maintain the glamour. I admired it, but I couldn’t like it. Summer was different. She had her set of masks and fronts she used to survive, like all of us, but there was something truer about her. Something more beautiful, despite Thalia’s obvious loveliness.
With a room like this, I wouldn’t have minded the feeling that I was born into the wrong family. I felt like I’d come from a cuckoo egg, and my parents had never noticed that they were raising the wrong child.
Or maybe they had noticed, but they couldn’t bring themselves to face it.
Wolf’s voice cut into my thoughts. ‘This was your idea. Help me out.’
I joined him at the bookcase and pulled out a book at random. The four I’d amassed in the box under my bed were embarrassingly meagre in comparison to Thalia’s collection.
‘We could be here forever,’ I muttered. ‘Know anything about breaking curses?’
‘No.’
I read out loud the title of the book I’d chosen. ‘Plants and Their Medicinal Uses Through the Ages. Wow.’
‘She studies,’ he agreed, flipping through another. ‘Oh yes, I remember this one. Druidic Circle Rituals.’ He showed me a drawing.
‘Would make a great tattoo,’ I commented.
‘You should get one.’
‘Sure.’
‘Why not?’ Wolf was smiling. He had a mischievous smile that was hard not to respond to.
‘I don’t have wonderfully bohemian parents like you,’ I said drily. ‘My mother would lose her mind.’
She might not even notice, to be fair, but he didn’t need to know that. I often liked to present my mother as grossly oversensitive and controlling to make up for the fact that she was never around.
‘My mother also,’ said Wolf.
‘But you already have a tattoo.’
‘That one is different.’
‘How come?’
He paused, as if trying to find the right words. ‘That one was chosen by them for me.’
I stared at him, uncomprehending.
‘It’s a tradition in my family,’ he said, under the weight of my gaze.
‘Really? You’re all tattooed?’
He shrugged a yes.
‘But … what for?’
‘Tradition,’ he repeated, stubbornly.
‘What does your lizard mean?’
‘Salamander,’ he corrected. ‘It represents fire.’ He snapped shut the book he was holding and turned away, searching for another one, and it seemed I would get nothing more.
It didn’t matter, though – I thought I had my answer. It sounded like Wolf was a fire witch. I tried to remember what they were supposed to be like. Strong, wasn’t it? I’d have to go back and reread Marcus’s website the first chance I got.
‘What are you doing?’ said Summer, from the doorway.
I flinched, froze, everything that made me look guilty. But Wolf didn’t even pause.
‘Looking through your sister’s books for something,’ he said, as if it were the most normal thing in the world.
‘For what?’
‘To help River with her plan.’
I shot him a look.
Summer came further in and glanced at me. ‘What plan?’
*
Summer led us up to the top floor, where Fenrin’s and Wolf’s bedrooms were. The cock-and-balls floor, she called it. When she pushed open Fenrin’s door, I hung back – surely he didn’t want to see us – but Wolf took the lead and I wasn’t going to be left behind.
Fenrin was sitting on his bed, his feet up, reading.
‘Fen,’ Summer said. I wondered if everyone could hear the tiny strain in her voice when she was acting brave in a way she didn’t feel, or if it was just me.
‘I’m sorry, Fenrin isn’t here right now,’ he drawled without looking up. ‘But you can leave a message with his rather gorgeous secretary, and he’ll get back to you when he feels like it.’
Summer picked up a towel folded neatly over his study chair and flung it at him.
‘Tell him he’s a horrible prick,’ she said, above his muffled laugh.
He pulled the towel off. ‘He knows,’ he replied regretfully, and just like that, it was fine between them again.
She slid onto the end of his bed. ‘River’s got something to say.’
She does? My heart triple bounced.
Fenrin looked up at me, and then his eyes strayed to Wolf, lurking against the wall.
‘Is it something about what a hideous family we are and that she’s moving to the moon to get as far away from us as possible?’
Oh Fenrin, you have no idea the lengths you’d have to go to get me to hate you. I’m not going anywhere.
I glanced at Wolf for support, but he just shrugged, as if to hand me the spotlight.
‘I think we could find a way to break the curse,’ I said.
I swore the air in the room grew colder.
He folded his arms. ‘What are you talking about?’
‘I know you said you don’t believe in it—’
‘I don’t,’ he replied flatly.
‘But just suppose it’s real.’
‘Let’s not.’
‘We could find a way to stop it. Research it. Somehow. We could …’ I cast around helplessly. When I’d thought about it, it was perfect. It would bring us together as a proper coven, working on solving a problem and protecting one another. It seemed so lame now that I was saying it out loud. ‘Look through books. You guys must have family history and stuff. Maybe there are patterns or clues—’
The look on his face stopped me.
‘Well, god,’ I said. ‘I’m just trying to help. I want to help.’
‘Fen,’ said Summer. ‘She came up with a good idea. She’s not a Grace, so she’s not under the curse, and neither is Wolf. I think involving them might do something different—’
Fenrin made a snorting sound. ‘It’s a bullshit family myth created to keep us from straying, Summer.’
‘I don’t believe that.’
‘I don’t care.’
Summer raised her hands in a helpless gesture. ‘Well, what do you want to do? Sit around and wait for things to get worse, like everyone else?’
‘Maybe if you just talked to Marcus—’ I offered.
‘Jesus,’ Fenrin snapped. ‘Don’t you think we tried that? This was a problem long before you came on the scene.’
‘Hey,’ said Summer sharply. ‘Don’t be an asshole.’
Fenrin sighed and tipped his head back. ‘I’m sorry. I will start again. I tried. He won’t hear it. It’s my fault. I bitched about my family once too often to him. Now he thinks we’re all toxic and evil and that we hate his guts. He’s really lost it. Nothing we say makes any difference.’
‘So we have only River’s option left,’ said Wolf, softly. ‘If you don’t believe in the curse, what harm could trying to break it do? And if it works, and the curse is broken, you could be free to be with whoever you want.’
I watched Fenrin’s gaze fall on Wolf, his expression dark, and then travel to the rest of us.
‘Thalia won’t let us do it,’ he said, finally.
Summer spread her hands. ‘So we don’t involve her. There are four of us, right here. One for each element, four to complete the circle. It’s perfect.’
‘You want to do this behind her back.’
‘Fen, she will freak out if we tell her, and she’ll probably even tell Esther. She’s all high on guilt and fear, like this is her fault. You know she thinks messing with the curse might make it worse, even though there’s no evidence of that. She can’t think straight about this.’
He sighed shortly. ‘Fine. I must be desperate. Let’s try it.’
A t
ense quiet settled over the room.
Summer raised an eyebrow. ‘Shall we set a date?’
CHAPTER 17
It was decided.
We would try to break the curse on midsummer’s eve, in just over a week’s time.
Midsummer was all about driving away bad energy – it would be perfect. But most of all, Thalia wouldn’t be around. Midsummer was next Friday – she was staying at a family friend’s house until that Sunday night. We’d have to go to the woods straight after school, all four of us, and Fenrin had a few days to come up with an excuse as to why Thalia wouldn’t see any of us that evening.
They were a family of secret keepers, but Summer once told me that the three siblings had always sworn to never keep secrets from one another, at least. Fenrin brooded, and everyone around him at school caught his mood and talked over his head, making uneasy jokes, waiting for the moment he would shake it off with a laugh and be himself again.
Wolf was back in the city the rest of the week, as always, but he would meet us outside school on Friday. In the meantime, we had to get on with our lives as if this plan, my plan, didn’t weigh round our necks, shade our eyes like scuffed sunglasses, making everything else hard to focus on.
We hung out together over the next few days, mostly with other people. When it was just us we didn’t talk about the plan, as if we’d jinx it by saying it out loud. Even in a crowd of others it felt like we were bound together by invisible threads. I couldn’t get the woods out of my mind, and I didn’t think the others could, either. I didn’t even care when Niral spent one lunchtime talking to Summer with her back deliberately to me, shielding me from view, so I spent a good half an hour sitting in silence. It didn’t matter any more. Niral was on the outside now.
I was officially in.
*
I spent one furtive lunchtime of that week in the computer lab, combing Marcus’s website for anything relevant, anything I might have missed.
I looked again at the witch types:
Fire – Protectors. Confident. Powerful.
Water – Charmers. Restless. Persuasive.