Everything was amplified with Julie. And it definitely wasn’t good, even from the beginning. I’d spend too long talking to a fan after a show. When we got home, Julie would throw things at me, screaming about how I was only using her, I didn’t love her, all the works. I’d scream back. I’d leave, getting all broody. I’d punch the wall.
Once, we’d had a fight and I threw her out of my apartment. I have no idea how she scaled the wall, with just a wonky drainpipe to hold onto, but she’d climbed onto the balcony. I hadn’t known she was there until glass shattered. She’d thrown a pot plant through the glass door.
I’d left on tour the next day and when I came back the place was a mess, all mud and broken glass over the floor. It’d rained heavy during the time I’d been gone.
I thought about cleaning it up but Julie turned up and we ended up screwing against the wall. Afterwards, we packed up my stuff and I moved somewhere else. What did I care? I had money and the band was only getting bigger and bigger. I could walk out of that messed-up apartment and find somewhere better.
That was Julie. And that was me, at that time. We’d make a mess ,then walk away.
The band got bigger. We made more money than my mind could comprehend and we drew crowds that I couldn’t even imagine. When we went on tour, we were the headliners. The world loved us. We could do no wrong and life was one big party.
The partying got harder and harder. I’d be up all night, then need to rehearse. Of course, there was always someone around offering a few pills or some powder to help out.
It was all fun, at first. We were the golden couple. Our relationship was never made public and Tex was crazy about keeping Julie out of the press, but to those in the inner circle, we just had to snap our fingers and we got what we wanted. Didn’t even need to snap half the time.
Julie was so turbulent anyway and the drugs didn’t help but, God, when things were good, they were really good. We were invincible. When they were bad though, sometimes I wondered if we’d kill each other. We embraced that darkness. We wanted to hurt each other, striking out at each other with words intended to hurt. I found out Julie had been screwing around while I was on tour and I thought I’d die from the pain. So I tried to do the same but her hold on me was too tight.
We’d fight and scream until we burnt ourselves out, then we’d screw like it was the last sex we’d ever have before the world ended. Afterwards, we’d sleep, so entangled in each other that I never knew where Julie ended and I started. It became a blur of drugs and drink, fights and fucking, humid summer nights and dark rooms with sweat-soaked sheets.
She came to me one day, in tears.
“Tex has bought some hideous old house in the middle of nowhere. He wants me in a prison.”
Tex had told me about the house. I knew she’d hate it but there was no telling him. Anyway, at that stage, I kinda wanted Julie away from all the shits hanging around her. Tex wanted to keep her away from the drugs but I wanted to keep her from the sleazes who were only too happy to take my place.
“Let me move in with you,” she’d sobbed.
That’d been tempting but even then I’d seen the harm in it. She’d be much safer with Tex. That’s what I’d thought anyway, but Julie had outsmarted both of us. She knew the world was full of people who’d cater to her whim. She was young and beautiful and rich. Isolating her from the world hadn’t saved her.
Now, he’d put a ton of money into turning that house into a home for kids. That was the difference between us. Instead of getting involved, I’d run. I’d run and keep running, putting as much distance between the past and me as I could. I didn’t need another Julie in my life, that’s for sure. What I needed was someone sane and grounded.
The teenage girl in the waiting room still watched me. She pretended to play a game on her phone but she watched. I shuddered and thought about moving away. Then she looked down at her phone and back and me. She snickered. That creeped me out. She did it again. What the hell was on her phone that amused her so much?
I stood up and grabbed the phone out of her hand. She had one of those celebrity news sites up.
Yep, it was a picture of me, stumbling out of the venue the other night. Shit, I looked like hell. I’d fallen over on my way out and had mud caked on my face. I had my arm around someone, another groupie, I guess.
I handed the phone back to her. I’d seen that shit a million times. It was nothing to me. Sure, I looked more tragic than usual. Give me another ten years and I’d just look pathetic. But that was it. Nothing too bad about that.
Huh? Something was wrong though.
I grabbed the phone again.
“Hey dude, buy your own phone. You can afford it.”
It wasn’t just some generic groupie in that shot. It was the fan I’d met in the hallway. The one that was all bubbly and marshmellowy. She’d been a sweet chick.
Shit. The headline called her my latest fling. That made me mad. She wasn’t a fling; she was a fan. That was a whole other scenario. I never messed with fans. I treated them with respect and niceness. Still, she probably loved having the two of us together in the headlines. Her moment of glory. It’d all blow over in a day or two.
The receptionist called my name and I stood up.
“She looks too good for you,” the surly teenage said as she grabbed her phone back.
“Yeah, you’re right about that. She’s way too good.”
Chapter 8.Devon
“Are you fucking stupid?”
The manager just grinned that stupid grin he got every time I asked him that. He was a damn fool.
“Listen, mate, your popularity has been slipping for a while—”
“Has not!”
“Yeah, it has. You have a bad image. That bad boy rock star rebel image is all well and good when you’re young and pretty but you’ve been playing it too long.”
I pursed my lips. “Have you seen my face? There’s plenty of young and pretty here. More than enough.”
He folded his arms and glared back. Where was that waitress with my coffee? If it was too early for a real drink, then a shot of caffeine would be the least I needed to get through this.
“Whatever. It’s not working for you anymore though. You’re getting bad feedback. I scan the social media every day. I have all the alerts and I know what’s going on out there in the hearts of your fans. They are getting tired of the dramas and the groupies and the crazy. You need to change it.”
This guy was a turd, that was for sure. If he knew anything at all about my fans, he’d know that they loved me. They loved my recklessness and they loved my crazy. There’s no way they’d ever want me to change.
“You’re not convinced? Here, check this out.”
He handed me his laptop open to a fansite. Maybe there were one or two negative things but most of them would be positive.
I scanned through the posts, ready to make wisecracks about his stupid ideas. Holy hell though, the more I read, the worse it got. It wasn’t even mean stuff. My fans were sad.
“…he’s ruining his life…”
“I hate to see him like that.”
“Devon needs to find a good woman and settle down. I know one. ME!!! *grin*”
It broke my heart to think they worried about me. My antics had always been a bit of fun. Part of my devilish image. Except it was no image. Even though I’d gone clean on the drugs after Julie died, I’d never stopped partying. I never wanted to stop either. I liked drinking and I liked women. I liked doing what I wanted, without giving it a second thought.
“Why did you punch him?”
“Because I was drunk and he pissed me off. That seems perfectly logical to me. A real man would’ve left it at that, or hit me back. But that loser, he’s crying like a little bitch and wants to take me to court. You deal with it. That’s your job.”
I put my leg up on my knee and rolled my head back. This was getting boring and I wanted out.
“Actions have consequences.”
I
leaned forward and glared at him. “I know that, love, that’s why I’m here. So you can handle the consequences.”
“You could handle it by not punching people.”
“That wouldn’t be very rock.”
He coughed. He had something in mind and I knew I wouldn’t like it. The coffees arrived and the waitress looked at me with the perfect amount of admiration. Her phone number would be on the back of our check, that’s for certain.
“Here’s the thing. Those photos the press took, the ones of you and that girl—”
“That’s nothing. It’ll all die down in a heartbeat.” It’d been a disaster but I was more worried about the material for the new album.
“No. People love it. It’s gotten a very positive reaction. She’s not a model, she’s not a groupie. She’s not even beautiful, just cute in a very ‘girl-next-door’ way. The fans are going mad. They think you’ve settled down and got your shit together. They are all like, ‘well, if it’s not me, she’s the kind of girl I’d pick for Devon.’”
The guy was crazy. Fans didn’t want to see me with another girl. They wanted to see me with them. But he pulled out a report with graphs, pie charts even, proving his point. You can’t argue with pie charts.
“So, what do you want from me? You want me to find some regular girl and date her?”
“Not a regular girl, this regular girl.”
“Huh? I don’t even know her.” I remembered her name. It was Daisy. Daisy and Meadow. But, other than that, I had no idea who she was.
“Can’t you find her? She was backstage. She must’ve gotten a pass from somewhere. Maybe she works for the record company or for the media. I’ll get my assistant onto it.”
I shook my head. “Do you even work in this industry? Not everyone backstage has a pass. She didn’t even have a laminate. Her and her friend talked their way backstage, they weren’t on any guest list. You’ll never be able to track her down.”
“I’m not going to track her down. You are.”
“Am bloody not.” I had an album to record and all other kinds of shit. I wasn’t about to waste my time finding a random girl and fake-dating her. And this guy wondered why I punched people.
“There’s no point even recording this album the way things are going. Find the girl, date her for a while. Then, after the album’s released, quietly break it off.”
I huffed. He couldn’t be serious.
“You want the overseas tour? You want the big budget release? Well, prove it. It’s not like it’s going to kill you.”
“I’ll look for a week and if I don’t find her, then we give up this stupid idea, right?” I’d make a token effort and the whole thing would be forgotten.
“Sure, but if you find her, you’ll date her.”
I’d never find her. He’d never find her. I didn’t even know if she lived in this town or if she’d just come into town for the gig.
“Hell yeah. Anything you say.”
Chapter 9.Daisy
It was him. It was definitely him. He sat at a table in the same cafe that I stood in. I’d just slipped in for my afternoon break. I needed coffee like no one’s business. I sure as hell wasn’t dressed for run-ins with rock stars.
Now I’d seen him, what did I do? I needed a reason to talk to him. If I had that picture from the paper on me, I could’ve gotten him to autograph it. That would’ve been awesome. Shit, why had I stuck it up beside my computer monitor instead of carrying it with me? I’m an idiot, that’s why.
Hell, I should’ve known this would happen. My stars had said I’d have a lovely surprise today. It didn’t get lovelier than running into Devon in the coffee shop near work. I wondered if he came in every day. I’d have to time my breaks to make sure.
Anyway, he’d invited us for drinks backstage and that beared thanking him again. It wasn’t like I didn’t know him. We were practically chums. It’d be downright rude to not go over and say hello.
I moved down the cafe, pushing by the tables that were packed too close together. I nearly stumbled over some chick’s handbag strap. Had Devon seen that?
He couldn’t see me. He sat half-turned, fuming at the other guy with him. The other guy was older and had a big scowl on his face.
I took the hair tie out of my hair where I’d scraped it back into a ponytail, and ran my fingers through it. I didn’t even have a lipstick on me, just my wallet to pay for my coffee.
“Hi,” I said, putting on my breeziest voice. My stomach acted like it had a mind of its own, jumping all around, but I’d sounded confident at least.
Devon turned slowly. For an instant, he looked horrified. It couldn’t have been because of me. I bet he was pleased to see me. Then he slapped on a smile.
“Ah, hi…”
The other guy jumped up from his seat and held out his hand for me to shake. I took it, then he offered me a seat. I was due back at work but screw them. I’d just been asked to have coffee with Devon. That didn’t happen every day. What were they going to do? Sack me? My contract ran out in two days’ time and I had no more work lined up. Being unemployed was the same if it started now or two days’ time. Anyway, there was literally nothing for me to do. I think they’d just been keeping me around because they didn’t want to end my contract early.
Devon didn’t look right at me. If anything, he seemed a bit queasy. The other guy smiled like he’d won the lottery though.
“Can I order you a coffee or anything?” he asked.
I’d already put my drink order in but I could have a coffee now and pick that up on the way out.
“I’ll have a latte, thanks.”
While he waved down the waitress, Devon gave me a weak grin.
“Sorry about the other night, the photo and everything.”
“No problem at all. Hell, I got twenty copies of that issue and have them pinned up everywhere. I might even use the photo on my Christmas cards.” That didn’t make me sound cool. I’d actually already sent copies of the photo to everyone I knew. I had one framed on my wall. I thought about getting the picture printed on a t-shirt. I could wear it to the next show.
Devon didn’t seem too happy about that. Weird.
The other guy smiled though.
“So, umm…”
“Daisy,” I said.
“I’m Devon’s manager, Pete. Nice to meet you.”
He did seem particularly overjoyed about the whole thing. I wasn’t sure why. I mean, I’m a pretty swell person and all but not enough to make some stranger that happy. He kept sizing me up too. I remembered what Meadow had said about blowing roadies. This guy didn’t look like a roadie, but I sure as hell wouldn’t be blowing him.
No one said a word. The two of them had some serious eye anger going on. That fire just made Devon hotter. If they didn’t want to talk, that was fine by me. I’d sit and gaze upon Devon all day if I could.
My coffee arrived and I added sugar, even though I’d quit about a month ago. Oops. I’d just have to drink it, since I’d look even more of a fool if I didn’t.
“So, Daisy, you’re a bit of a fan?”
“Hell yeah. I’ve been a fan of Devon since the start. Back when he was just a fresh-faced kid.” I grinned at Devon and he shuffled in his seat. Maybe he was feeling sick. He sure looked queasy.
“Look, I’ll cut to the chase. I’ve got an offer for you.”
He’d heard me sing and wanted to offer me a contract? That was what managers offered. No, that couldn’t be it. If he’d heard me sing, he’d not be offering me a contract. I had no idea what then. Maybe he needed a secretary? My photocopying skills were legendary.
“I’m all ears.”
“There’s been a very positive fan reaction the photo of the two of you together.”
I swivelled around to face Devon. “Really? Wow. We do look good together, don’t we?”
Devon just grimaced. Okay, he’d not looked that great in the photo but it was still a great photo. Any photo of me with Devon would be a good one.
> “You look fantastic together. Perfect.”
Yeah, I thought we looked perfect too but I was too modest to say that. This guy though, he knew what he was talking about. What was going on though? Did Devon want to date me but was too shy to ask? That seemed fishy and also made him a whole lot of a soft cock. Still, I’d do it. I had no qualms. Not one single qualm in my entire body, if it meant dating Devon. Hell, he could get his mother to ask me out and I’d scream yes.
“We’d like to continue the facade for a while.”
Huh? What was the guy talking about? Facade? That was no facade. Well, maybe things seemed a bit more intimate between us than they had been in reality. We really did look like we’d been doing some sleazy groping.
“If you agree to making some public appearances with Devon, spending a bit of time with him, maybe even looking affectionate, then we will compensate you for your time.”
“Sex?”
“Not sex.”
Damn, I would’ve like the sex bit. What was this about? Then I got it.
“You want to pay me to be Devon’s fake girlfriend?”
“I know it’s a bit awkward and I’m sorry about—”
“Hell yeah! Sign me up. Sign me up now. Quick, get out your signing material. I was born to do this job. It’s like the pinnacle of my life’s work.” I looked to Devon again. “I’ll be the best fake girlfriend you ever had. This is so sweet.”
I hugged myself and thought my grin might literally split my face. Still, Devon didn’t look too happy. I got out my phone to call Meadow but the manager guy took it out of my hand.
“Absolutely no one must know about this. No one. That’s part of the deal. Everything must look legit.”
I nodded. I could do that. I moved my chair over and put my arm around Devon. If we were dating, we wouldn’t be sitting so far apart.
“I can take selfies though?”
“You can take as many selfies as your heart desires.”
Even sweeter. I was awake? Coz this was all my dreams come true.
Bad for You (Fallen Star Book 4) Page 4