Oren joined them. “Zander offered to lead the rite. Brandle gave him permission, pending objections.”
Jorick shrugged. “Let him. I’ve conducted enough of them.”
Oren made a soft noise of agreement as Loren and Xandria joined them. Sorino and Kai came a moment later. The vampire looked miffed to be interrupted. In Katelina’s opinion it was the least he could do. Des might have been an asshole, but he’d died fighting on their side. He deserved funeral attendance.
She said as much, and Jorick snorted. “These ceremonies are to comfort the living, not the dead. I question whether anyone liked Des enough to bother.”
Oren balked. “Our feelings make no difference. This isn’t a rite of comfort, it’s one of respect, to honor the dead.”
“Does he know he’s being honored?” Jorick asked. “To say he cares one way or another implies his consciousness continues.”
Katelina cut in, “You mean his soul? Why wouldn’t it?”
“Vampires have no souls, little one. We traded them for immortality.”
Oren cleared his throat. “You would ask me to believe that my sons had no souls? That the child inside has none?”
Jorick hesitated. “Perhaps, there are exceptions.”
“How could there be exceptions?” Katelina asked. “Unless there’s an intelligence who identifies those exceptions. Last I checked you didn’t believe in God.”
“I didn’t say I believe in an intelligence, only…”
“Only you do, deep down, but you like to pretend you don’t. Otherwise you wouldn’t believe vampires traded their souls in the first place.”
“One can have a soul without a God,” Jorick argued.
“Then what’s to stop a vampire from having one?”
Before Jorick could reply, Verchiel appeared. “Zander’s ready to start.”
Sorino sniffed. “Yes, get on with it.”
The others nodded. Zander entered from the shadows, with a torch made from a broken table leg. His long hair and trailing robe lent a mystic quality to the scene that gave Katelina goosebumps.
He stopped before the pyre and raised the burning torch. “We invoke thee, Goddess of Night. Come to us on velvet wings and fly away the spirit of our brother, Des, to your realm of eternal darkness. Take him to his rest and his reward, comfort him in this time of transformation, and allow him to remain at your side, your humble servant.”
Katelina glanced at Jorick, as if to say, “Even he believes in a soul,” but she went ignored.
Zander touched the torch to the kerosene soaked wood. “We deliver Des’ remains to the flame, that they may devour his shell of clay, and release him to his ultimate divinity, to take his place at your feet.”
Zander touched the torch to several more places. When the fire had a good hold, he tossed it among the flames. “We thank thee, Goddess, and ask as always that you grant your protection and guidance to us. Batna is our queen.”
When no one spoke, Brandle stepped up. “Would anyone like to say a few words?”
Oren cleared his throat. “Des and I did not always see eye to eye but, when it came to it, one could not call him a coward.”
“Yeah,” Micah agreed. “An asshole but not a coward.”
“He was bored,” Torina said.
“Aren’t we all?” Jorick muttered. Katelina looked to him sharply. He shrugged. “Life is ninety percent boredom, mortal and immortal alike.”
She wanted to ask if he found her boring, but the funeral was the wrong time.
Silence fell, except for the snapping crackle of flames. The firelight threw long wavering shadows, like fingers stretching out to the surrounding night. They each had one, their own private darkness. All of them but Des. Surrounded in fire, he didn’t cast a shadow. In Katelina’s mind it was because he wasn’t there anymore. His light, and his darkness, were gone to the next place.
She wondered what Zander’s idea of the afterlife was like. He’d mentioned worship at the feet of the Night Goddess, but was that it? It was little reward for a life, if reward it was meant to be. Maybe Jorick was right. Maybe vampires didn’t go to heaven, and maybe the Night Goddess was the queen of hell.
If so, we should all pray to her.
Chapter Fifteen
When Katelina asked, Jorick told her he wasn’t bored with her. “I didn’t mean anything by it. You read too much into offhand comments, little one. You’re many things, but boring is not one of them.”
Mollified, she asked him about Benny and the others. Apparently, the three had been living in the destroyed building. No doubt it had been built for Traven, his wife, and the elite.
“That’s common with large covens,” Jorick explained. “There’s a ruling class and there’s the general population. When Traven didn’t return, the remaining vampires probably decided they deserved the better quarters.”
Katelina couldn’t blame them for that.
“They had some blood stored in the master’s building, but not a lot. There was a large freezer in the main coven house. When they shut off the power to it — probably to save fuel — everything spoiled.”
It was another waste, like so many.
“What did you do with Lilith’s dead followers?”
“Oren insisted we bury them with the others. In his current mood, I’m surprised we didn’t have a funeral for them.”
Though the main house had a room full of boxes, Katelina opted for the empty couch. She woke to a silent scream, and saw Jorick soothing Estrilda back to sleep.
“The sun is still up,” Jorick said. “Rest, little one. There’s not enough stored blood for us to have extra.”
Katelina didn’t argue. When she woke again, it was to Jorick moving around the room.
“You’re awake early.”
“Or you’re awake late,” he teased. “I was going to get blood. I’ll bring you some.”
She nodded appreciation and sat up. Across from her, Estrilda slept. Andrei was going to come tonight, then…what? Would he want her killed? Was it really that bad?
Curiosity got the better of her. Katelina moved to the other couch and gently lifted the blanket. She dropped it quickly. Gone were Verchiel’s shirt and the remnants of the pink dress, leaving Estrilda’s scarred chest exposed. Her torso ended just under her ribs, in a lumpy glomp that made her look like a chicken nugget.
A lot of her organs were obviously gone. Was her stomach? Katelina wasn’t sure how necessary it was to a vampire. They drank blood and…what? Did the stomach process it? She knew in human biology nutrients were absorbed into the blood through the stomach and intestines. It made sense that it worked the same for vampires. If Estrilda didn’t have a stomach, could she digest blood, or would she starve to death?
Jorick returned with breakfast for the two of them. Katelina downed hers, then asked whether the child could feed anymore.
“I don’t know. Vampires in that condition aren’t kept alive, little one.” He held his hand up to stop her reply. “I know your feelings, but it’s the way it is. Modern humans have gotten so ‘life’ obsessed, they’d rather suffer untold horrors than let it go.”
“What if that happened to me? Or to you?”
“I’d expect you to put me out of my misery. I’m not so desperate for life that I want to live in anguish.”
“You’d be willing to leave me?”
“Rather than live like that? Yes. I’m sorry. That’s not the answer you want, but it’s the truth.”
Katelina pursed her lips and changed the subject. “Where’s Verchiel? I need to use his phone and call the hospital.”
“I have no idea. Maybe still asleep. Or feeding.”
“I’ll go look.”
She came across the redhead in the kitchen, beating a packet of frozen blood with a hammer. “Hello, Kately. Do you need one?”
“What are you doing?”
“I’m going to break it up and swallow the shards. Easier than thawing it, since the microwave quit working.” He motione
d to the appliance. “Someone I won’t name—Zander—put a metal cup in it. There were some sparks and a lot of smoke. Now it won’t do anything.”
“Yeah, Zander seems a little out of touch.”
“That’s an understatement.” Verchiel paused to survey his handiwork. “He seems like a nice guy, though.”
“I guess. Can I borrow your phone?”
“Knock yourself out.” He tugged it from his pocket and tossed it to her.
She skipped past the anime-girl lock screen, and schoolgirl homepage, to his recent calls. The Ohio number stood out among the others.
When a nurse answered, Katelina had a hard time getting information. Finally, the woman snapped, “She’s been moved. We called the contact number on file.”
Katelina checked the missed calls. The last one was labeled Jamie from yesterday. “I don’t have a call from you.”
“Then obviously you’re not the contact number. Either way, she’s been moved.”
“To where?”
“Sorry. You’ll need to contact the family. Good—”
“I am the family!”
“Goodbye.”
The woman hung up. Katelina stopped from throwing the phone in frustration.
“Problem?” Verchiel fished frozen blood crystals out of the open bag.
“They moved her, but they didn’t call!”
He crunched the shards. “Not bad. Kinda like a popsicle. Maybe they called Brad? Since he’s her fiancé, he’s probably the contact number.”
“Fiancé? No. They’re only…I don’t know. Living together.”
Verchiel dumped frozen shards into his mouth and chewed. “That’s right. I guess no one had a chance to tell you.”
Katelina choked. “What? They told you?”
“No. I noticed the ring on the bed stand, in the little cup with her watch and hairpins. I just assumed.”
“Well don’t. My mom loves costume jewelry. A ring doesn’t mean anything.”
“It looked like a real diamond to me, but hey, none of my business.” He dumped the last of the bag in and crunched it loudly. “I wonder if freezing it takes the nutrients out? I guess if I’m hungry later I’ll know. I’ve had popsicles before, but not as a meal.”
“Blood popsicles?”
“Sure, why not. And blood candy. Didn’t you try some at Sadihra and Wolfe’s wedding in Munich?” When she blinked, he shrugged. “It went pretty fast. It’s basically clotted or congealed into a glob, sometimes with flavoring. They had it in tiny muffin cups. It was cute. Anyway, so your mom?”
“I don’t know. They’ve been threatening to move her, but never said where. Probably a nursing home. God. I should have stayed. I came to rescue Sarah and Estrilda, and look what happened. Sarah turned out to be a traitor. Estrilda might as well be dead.”
“Estrilda was no one’s fault,” Verchiel said. “I don’t think Anya planned to hurt her. She was trying to destroy Des.”
“Maybe, but if I see that bitch again, I’m going to kill her with my bare hands.”
Verchiel flinched. “That’s violent.”
“It’s nothing compared to what I’ll do to Sarah.”
Verchiel crumpled the plastic bag. “If you do something to her, you’ll be sorry later.”
“Are you serious? Did you hear her? No, you weren’t there. Let me bring you up to speed—”
“I know. Jorick told us. Your friend…I think she’s in a complicated place.”
“You mean a crazy place? She tried to kill my mother! God, she murdered her own parents and half our town! I don’t even know who died because of her, but I guarantee there were people I knew among the casualties. How am I supposed to forgive that?”
“You won’t, not right away. You’re angry right now. And betrayed.”
“You’re damn right I am! After everything we’ve been through together, for her to do this…be like this…I don’t understand it! She’d have never hurt someone, let alone butchered half our town! Not before.”
“Probably not. She was tortured for months. That does something to people. Maybe you just need to reset her.”
“What?”
“You know, like putting the internet router back to factory settings. Look, it’s your memories that make you who you are, right? So if you removed them…”
“You’re saying if someone removed Sarah’s memories she’d go back to her old self? That’s kind of insane. For one thing, none of us can do that.”
“Samael can.”
“How do you know?”
“Quick. Tell me what happened when you were a prisoner at Malick’s.”
Katelina balked. “What does that have to do with anything? I was in a cell with Boris. You guys came, I got my throat slit, Micah turned me.”
“What about your interrogation?”
“I…I don’t know. I don’t remember it. Malick wanted me to contact Samael and…What does it matter?”
“Where do you think those memories went? Did you just forget them?” When she looked helpless, he clarified, “Samael sealed them away, because he knew you couldn’t deal with it. Imagine if he hadn’t. For all you know, you might have wanted to kill everyone.”
Like Sarah.
There was nothing to do but wait for Andrei. Katelina took advantage of the downtime to do laundry. She had to pull Verchiel’s coat out of the dryer. Singed and full of holes, she wasn’t sure it was worth saving.
Two hours later, she was in the middle of folding her second load when Micah wandered in, lugging a military style duffel bag.
“Hey, slave, wash this.”
She didn’t look up from Jorick’s black shirt. “Hey, jack ass, wash it yourself.”
“What the fuck kind of answer is that? You’re supposed to respect your master.”
“Right. Like you do.”
He jerked the nearest of four washers open. “Mine’s a different story. I told ya already, he ain’t in the picture.”
She set the shirt aside and started on another. “You expect me to believe he turned you and walked off? Why didn’t you go after him?”
“Because I didn’t know where to go, plus I didn’t know the lunatic.” Micah dumped the bag into the machine. “I ain’t in the mood for a history lesson, girlie.”
“Whatever. It’s not like I care.” She set aside the shirt and went for a third. “You said he pulled you out of the water?”
“Jesus!” Micah slammed the lid. “What do you want? The goddamn story?”
She shrugged and moved for a fourth identical shirt. My God. Jorick’s wardrobe needs variety.
“Fine.” Micah banged the lid open again to dump in laundry soap. “I was working at Lo Dog’s mechanic shop. He was a friend of mine. Or I thought he was a friend of mine. His fucking son was a junky, and started stealing money. Of course they blamed my ass for it, so I quit and took off on my bike. I ain’t gonna sugar coat it. I got fucked up and drove my fucking bike off the pier. Yeah, I meant to fuckin’ drown. Everything went black. When I woke up I was on the goddamn beach, that fucking lunatic bent over me, all fangs and shit. I went nuts, punched his fuckin’ face. He laughed. Then he said, ‘You were strong, but now you’re stronger. If you still want to die, wait for the sunrise.’ And took off. That was it. No explanation about what he’d done, what he meant, what the hell he was, what he’d made me…” Micah finished setting the washer and started it. “I never saw the psycho again, and I’m happy that way. Anything else you wanna know?”
She shrugged and folded Jorick’s jeans. Black jeans. “Is there anything interesting?”
“That wasn’t interesting. I ain’t done a fucking interesting thing since I was born.”
“Then no, I don’t want to know anything else.” She set the jeans aside for a pair of trousers.
“You sure are a good little housewife. You gonna fold mine?”
“Not a chance. Get your own little ‘housewife’.”
“Done tried it, didn’t like it.” She looked up, suddenly
interested. He sniggered. “Nice try, princess. You already said there was nothin’ else you wanted to know. See ya later.”
She stopped from calling after him. He’d done that on purpose, and probably had it planned from the beginning.
Damn him.
Katelina stuffed the last of the clean clothes in the suitcase. As she snapped it closed, she heard the plane. Andrei was there. In a few minutes, he’d pronounce sentence on Estrilda.
Katelina squared her shoulders and headed to the living room. She thought about Estrilda, as she’d been the night of the ball. Despite the scars, she’d appeared fragile and delicate, even more so hours later when Lilith lifted her above the mess and smiled that slow, evil smile.
Fucking bitch.
Katelina passed Zander and Torina to join Brandle and Jorick by the open front door.
“He’s here,” Jorick said.
Outside, buildings obscured her view of the planes. She shifted impatiently and counted the heartbeats for something to keep her calm. At last, Andrei came into view. Tall and slender, he wore a tailored suit of dark blue. His long golden brown hair fanned out behind him as he strode purposefully toward them. He looked straight ahead with a resolution Katelina couldn’t believe.
He stopped outside and nodded. “Acwellen.”
“It’s Brandle now. But at the moment it hardly matters.” He offered his hand. “Would you like to rest first or…?”
“No. I’d like to see her.”
Andrei walked past them to the couch. When he lifted the blanket, Katelina heard his sharp intake of breath. He dropped it for the wrapped arm. With deliberate motions, he unwound the cloth. Estrilda’s hand was gone up to the wrist. What was left above was shaped like a lumpy sausage. Though the skin was smooth, there was obviously a lot of bone and tissue missing underneath.
Andrei cupped her cheek. Katelina saw the slow swallow as he forced down his emotions. Finally composed, he turned back to them. “Who holds her in sway?”
“I’ve kept her quiet,” Jorick said.
Andrei nodded. “It’s for the best. You know what must be done.”
And that was it. Like Jorick and Oren had said. But—
Goddess of Night (Amaranthine Book 9) Page 24