He wrapped his arms tighter around her and pressed her body against his chest. “Come on, Lynnie. It’s just that you’re so attractive. How can a guy help himself, and not want to have more of you?”
It was kind of a compliment. So it kind of worked against her resolve to make him grovel a bit more. She relaxed into his arms. “Well, don’t press me again.”
“I won’t. I won’t. Now, are we good?”
She sighed. Why not be good? Shane was throwing peanuts at her brother, rarely sparing a glance at her. So why not be good with Drew? “Yes, we’re good.”
Soon, the crowd grew too large for the cramped double-wide. They spilled out onto the front porch and yard. The night was warm and clear, and the stars hung out over the valley, far outnumbering the fading dots of man-made lights. A large bonfire was ignited and people mingled, drank some more, and laughed harder the later the evening grew. Feeling a bit chilled, she finally stepped close enough to enjoy the fire’s heat through the crowd. She sipped the beer she’d been nursing for over an hour. She wasn’t much of a drinker after having seen how it zapped her brothers’ ambition, and made them spend half their days nursing hangovers. She didn’t see the point. She was enjoying herself tonight, however. The guys were funny tonight, telling one story after another and describing the acts of mayhem they had all partaken in over the last few years. She heard everything: from practical jokes to arrest-worthy exploits. Things she didn’t even consider doing. But she knew her brothers did. She knew Drew sometimes did too. She just was never around during any of it. All the stories were familiar. They were invariably interspersed with sexual references, innuendos and macho exploits. Ever since she was fourteen, her brothers and their friends talked as if she weren’t there, and there wasn’t much they kept from her. She hated those parts of their conversations.
With nowhere else to go, and only a few girlfriends, she silently endured their raunchiness. How could she even pretend to avoid it?
Drew came up behind her again, and pulled her back against him. His lips touched her neck as he sucked gently. His hands were resting on her stomach, and he gently pushed his fingers upwards to test the weight of her breasts. She instantly swatted him away. Not there. Jordan was sitting beside her and Shane was directly across from her, talking about the bar brawl he’d been involved in last year. She did not want him to see Drew trying to fondle her. Drew did it again, and this time, she hissed at him to stop it.
No one was paying attention, except Ian. He was next to Shane, however, his gaze wasn’t on his brother, who was talking, but riveted right on her. She shifted her weight, feeling uncomfortable. From what? Drew’s obvious PDA? Or Ian witnessing it? She felt the heat start in her chest, before it hit her neck and ended in her cheeks. Damn. She was blushing. She quickly dropped her attention to the fire. Damn Ian. Why was he so freaking intense? And everywhere? So now he witnessed her argument with Drew. Why was he watching them? Angling her face more towards Drew, she scooted to the left, intending to at least block his view of them.
It was close to one in the morning before the crowd started to thin out. Kailynn was tired finally. After her second beer, she felt a little glow in her stomach and a hot flush in her cheeks. She giggled a little more too. She rarely giggled, except when she drank. She let Drew pull her back from the fire and take her behind one of the trees. He kissed her mouth, her cheeks, and her neck. His hands finally managed to fully cup her breasts. It felt nice, and she made a soft, almost purring, sound. He grew bolder the longer they stood there, making out, and pressing her up against him. She grew kind of warm and achy where he began thickening against her. It was… a curious sensation. She was also a little bit curious to see what a penis looked like in real life. She’d seen plenty of pictures to know how they looked, but she’d never… handled one. Or touched one. Or looked at a real naked one.
His hands cupped her butt as he suddenly groaned. His mouth traveled down to the top of her tank top and pushed it down a little.
“Let’s go to your room,” he mumbled while blowing warm air on top of the material that covered her nipple. “Don’t need another visit from Ian Eff-ing Rydell.”
She suddenly straightened her back. “Did you say Ian? What are you talking about?”
Drew popped his head back up and started nibbling on her neck again. She most likely would have a hickey tomorrow. “He came into the feed store and freaking warned me to stay away from you. Can you believe that prick? As if I’m some kind of danger to you.”
“Why would he do that?” Her voice sounded way too high. She pushed him back to get his attention off her neck. “Why would Ian come and warn you to stay away from me?”
He shrugged his shoulders. “How the hell’s bells should I know?” He pulled up on her butt and groaned again at the sensation. She didn’t. Her mind was otherwise occupied, trying to figure out why Ian Rydell would warn her boyfriend to stay away from her. The nerve! What was wrong with that man? He was so freaking weird.
“Your room?”
“What? Oh, yes, sure.”
She let him drop his hands before he followed her to the bedroom. He closed the door and lay down on her neatly made bed. Still wearing his dusty cowboy boots, she cringed as he crossed his ankles on her bed and the loose dirt fell off his boots and splattered all over her clean bedspread. She felt her mouth tightening. Didn’t he have any manners? Putting his dirty boots on her bed? He pulled her forward and started the nuzzling all over again. She, however, was still glaring at the offensive boots while trying to make herself forget about them, and simply seize the moment. But her gaze kept wandering down there as he shifted around to get more comfortable, causing even more dirt to fall on her bed. What if there was dried horse crap in that mess? There most likely was. Drew was fondling her now, and feeling her up. He kept kissing her while he kept trying pretty hard to lower her shirt over her breasts. He groaned, moaned, and tried to persuade her. She wanted to groan and moan, but all she could think about were his freaking boots. She suddenly ripped her mouth from his and sat up. Why couldn’t she just be normal? Or just get turned on? Or want to have sex? Why did she persist on making more of it than she should have? Why didn’t she just enjoy it? Who obsessed over filthy boots when her boyfriend was trying so diligently to make her feel nice?
“I think… I think that’s enough for tonight.”
He suddenly swore. “Are you kidding me? You’re going to blueball me like this? I thought… bringing me in here you were finally ready to spread those legs of yours.”
She shut her eyes. She didn’t like to talk about sex like that. She didn’t like to call it banging, or getting laid, or putting out, or hooking up… or all the other things most people called it. She didn’t like people who used crude language. Yet, for her entire life, that was all she was ever exposed to. Her brothers, their friends, her father, and her mother too.
She entered the room because of Drew’s strange pronouncement about Ian. But now? Now, she just wanted Drew to go home. Then she could vacuum the dirt off her bed.
He got up while mumbling. “I’m getting tired of being prick-teased.”
She wasn’t teasing him. Well… not on purpose. She just stared at her hands as he slammed her bedroom door and left. After waiting a few moments to collect herself, she raced to the hall closet to find the vacuum. Then, at one thirty in the morning, she tidied up her room.
****
Ian never really understood what Kailynn saw in the losers she dated. They all groped her publicly, and each and every time, without fail, she pried off their hands and loudly told them to stop. She didn’t like it. He definitely knew that about her. He knew that talking about hook-ups and conquests between her brothers and him never failed to make her completely ill at ease. But how no one else seemed to pick up on it, he didn’t know. Her mouth went tight, her eyes lowered, and she kind of sunk into herself. She was not into PDA. She was not into even talking about it. She was treated like one of the guys by all of them, yet s
he was so far beyond any of them, it was laughable. She was kind of prissy, in fact.
If she would finally lose the douche bags, maybe he could think about making his own move on her. But she always had a boyfriend in tow. If she broke up with one, by nearly the next day, she had another. Ian wasn’t interested in trying to squeeze himself into her day turnover. He couldn’t play the role of another jerk she used just to pass the time. He knew she had no intention of settling around here. All of this, and everything that comprised his life were not what she wanted in her life. She looked at it all with such disdain. She didn’t want even a sliver of what his life offered her.
And still, he wanted her. However, he wouldn’t come between her and another man. He wasn’t a jerk like that. He didn’t believe in pursuing any girl that was already claimed by another. He wasn’t a cheater, and never would be. Even if he kept missing his chance, he wasn’t about to horn in on another guy’s girl. Even if the loser didn’t deserve her. That was something he was adamant about.
When she disappeared into her bedroom, he figured Drew had finally convinced her to have sex with him. Ian crushed his beer can under his fist. He was no hypocrite. She and he were not together. They were barely friends, at least, on her end. Ian had sex regularly; so why shouldn’t she? He had no damn right to be jealous.
But he was. He hated how she wasted herself on pricks like Drew Nichols. He grew more than a little curious when Drew stormed out of there at one-twenty-five with his clothes still intact. He wasn’t buttoning or zipping anything before he stormed off and screeched away in that godawful car he drove. Even more curious was Kailynn suddenly appearing in the hall, still clad in the same clothes, grabbing the vacuum and quickly disappearing into her room. What exactly was there about cleaning up after sex that included vacuuming? Huh. Maybe he didn’t want to know. He shook his head and threw his empty beer can into the kitchen trash.
He later decided that getting drunk tonight might be a really good idea. He grabbed another unopened bottle, refusing to swallow the cheap crap his brother drank. Commandeering a lawn chair next to his brother and Jordan, who were still drinking and laughing by the fire, he thought, at least now, he could relax since that screw-off, Drew, was gone.
****
Really? Asleep in lawn chairs? Fortunately, they were the kind one could lay almost flat on. But she didn’t expect to find Ian, Shane and Jordan stretched out, all three in a row, snoring until the sunrise. Last night’s bonfire was now a bed of embers. There were plenty of cans and bottles scattered around them. The night was warm enough, but still. And she rarely saw Ian acting as one of them. With resignation, she started collecting garbage, carefully walking around the few stray bodies she found inside. She started to methodically collect the trash around the lawn chairs when Ian’s eyes opened. He groaned as he swung his legs off the reclined portion and sat up. Resting his head on his hand, he planted his elbow on his knees.
He didn’t say anything, so she shrugged and continued to clean up. Always, there was something to clean. She needed to get things in order there before she ran down to the Rydells’. She didn’t have a shift at the café today. She glanced up from her task when she felt something almost like a physical touch on her skin. But no. It was only Ian watching her. She scowled as they met in an eye lock. Why didn't he ever say anything? Good morning. Hello. Hi. Any one of those would do.
“Not like you to get caught up with them,” she said, nodding towards Shane and Jordan who were still zonked out and snoring. Shane was curled up on his side, his hands under his head and looked rather adorable in his alcohol-induced sleep. Usually, he was kind of surly and tough-looking. He was so big, he could effortlessly intimidate her into total silence. But now? He looked like an overgrown boy snuggling in bed.
Ian slowly rose to his feet and ran a hand over his face where he had little stubble. He shook his head. “No. And I remember why now. Stupid thing to do. Stupid way to wake up and feel.”
She watched as he started toward his ATV that he parked on the side of their lot. That was it? All their conversation?
Letting go of the garbage bag, she followed him. “Did you confront Drew? Like warn him to stay away from me?”
He grabbed his helmet and stuck it on his head before pausing to glance at her. “No. I told him to do what you wanted, and nothing more.”
“Or what?”
“Or I’d hurt him,” Ian said. His voice implied, duh, she should have known that’s exactly what he meant. But how could she ever dream Ian would react like that?
“Why? Why would you say such a thing?” Her voice rose higher as she spoke.
He shook his head, and the helmet prevented her from seeing his expression. “I already told you why.”
She stepped back when he simply started the blaring motor and pulled away without another word or look. Kicking at the dust he stirred up, it all clouded around her and made her start coughing. He already told her why? What was wrong with him? Why was he so weird? So cryptic? So strange? And what had he told her? That he’d kill Drew if he messed with her? That made no sense. He couldn’t mean that. Why? Why would he even care whatever Drew did with her? Sure, yeah, if she were raped or something, of course, her brothers and dad would care. In fact, she easily pictured them getting into their very generous supply of guns and killing anyone who dared to violate her. In their back woods way, they would always be there for her. They loved her.
But this, whatever Ian was doing, was somehow different than that. It felt more intimate. It was more… direct. Like he was watching out for her, or something. Maybe it was just all these years of her family being so dependent on his.
Later, she stepped into the Rydells’ log house. The downstairs was a huge, open air design with a fireplace in the center. The river rock fireplace and mantel were built by the boys’ father, using the rocks from the Rydell River, just a half mile away. It bordered one side of their ranch. It was a fantastic house, which amply compensated her need to work as a housekeeper for a living. She quickly began her chores. Today, she was sweeping, mopping and vacuuming every square inch of the house. The kitchen needed a good scrubbing too.
“Hey, Lynnie.”
“Hi, Charlie, how was your day?” she asked while scrubbing at the sink. Charlie dumped his backpack on one of the dining room chairs.
“Good. Where’s Erin? She’s taking me to see a bull.”
That was good. Charlie got angry at first when Jack and Erin started dating. He was slowly coming around, and Lynnie respected how Erin did it. She rarely stayed overnight at the house, and if she did, she didn’t let Charlie catch them. She let Charlie decide the pace in which she and his father were moving forward so Charlie could easily grow used to it.
“I don’t know—” She stopped talking when Erin walked in through the front door.
“Hey guy, you still wanting to do it?” Erin asked as she entered the house. She flashed Lynnie a smile and grabbed an apple. “How was school?”
“Good. Yeah, I want to do this. Did you tell Dad?”
“Yeah. Why?”
He shrugged. “Just curious. He won’t let Ben do it.”
Kailynn and Erin exchanged looks. Charlie had grown fascinated recently with the local rodeo. It was the first interest Charlie had shown in anything with horses, or the ranch lifestyle. Only it wasn’t the horses that caught Charlie’s usually bookish personality; it was the big, bucking broncos. He went nuts cheering for them and watched it on TV for hours while narrating the entire schedule of events. He began to recognize correct form and could predict when someone couldn’t hold on. He knew so much about it, Kailynn often had to tune out his excited, yet thorough, explanations.
Erin was taking him up the valley a few miles to watch one of the locals practice.
Erin stopped and glanced at her. “How was last night? Ian and Shane never showed up.” Erin grinned and rolled her eyes. It pained her to hear Shane so casually mentioned. Her cheeks inevitably flared in color when she even b
egan thinking of him.
“Last night was pretty much the usual. Big fire. Lots of beer. Lots of dirty talking. You know, the usual.”
Erin laughed in her pretty way. Her smile used to be a rare thing indeed. When she did smile, it was huge and brightened her entire face. She was so lovely, at first Kailynn was even intimidated to talk to her. But she was so nice, without knowing it, and likeable that one just wanted to smother her with compliments so she’d finally get a glimpse of who she really was. She had a rather distorted view of herself.
She hung an arm around Kailynn’s shoulders, which was not easy as she was half a foot shorter. “You need to get out of here. That is not you. Or your future. When are you planning to go to college?”
Erin said that to her at least once a week ever since Kailynn confided in her last year. During one of their talks, she said that was her innermost dream. Erin pounced on it in a way Kailynn never expected. She prodded, and talked, and pushed Kailynn. She thought it was the coolest thing she’d ever heard. Kailynn understood her passion. Erin couldn’t read, so it was literally a pipe dream to her, and in many ways, to Kailynn too, although she never said so to Erin. That would have been too mean because she could do the work, while Erin, quite literally, could not.
She smiled and pretended to shoo Erin off. “Right now, I need to just finish making your dinner. Go. Have fun.”
Erin gripped her hand. “Really, Lynnie, this isn’t you. You don’t even drink. Drew Nichols? Come on. You can do so much better.”
“You miss the point, Erin. There is nobody better around here.”
“The Rydells.”
She made a face. Erin was half into hero-worship for all of them after how they helped her. “They are my employers. Not part of my dating pool.” She would not even admit to Erin it was exactly the opposite.
Charlie and Erin left just as Ian entered. He slipped in the front door and stopped dead. Never one to stomp in, or slam doors, he was more like a tall, slim, quiet ghost moving around than a man.
River's Escape (River's End Series, #2) Page 5