by Vivian Arend
“We’re sorry, Mommy.”
She hugged them close. Now that her heart had slowed from the fear of having them near the water alone, she understood the attraction. Although, they hadn’t been unsupervised—her mysterious stranger had been there. Daniel had managed to tangle himself into her life whether she wanted him there or not.
“Okay, guys. I know you’re excited from the picnic, but it’s time to start slowing things down. I want all of you in the tub, then we can read together before bed.”
The boys raced off to the bathroom, voices raised in energetic shouts. Beth breathed a contented sigh until she remembered Daniel waited on her deck. What in the world was she going to do?
She placed a trembling hand on the back door. There was no unwind button she could push. No way to make the past disappear. He was probably stubborn enough if she didn’t go out he’d sit there all night like he’d threatened. She sucked in her courage and pressed the door open.
The porch boards squeaked, announcing her approach, and he looked up from where he’d settled on the old-fashioned swing.
He hesitated before speaking, sincerity clear in his tone. “You’ve got awesome kids. I’m sorry again about the swimming-hole thing. It never crossed my mind you didn’t know.”
She waved his confession away. “I’m mortified I didn’t figure out where they were disappearing to. I should have kept much better tabs on their whereabouts, and I’m grateful you had an eye on them.”
He stood and peeked in the window. “Will you need to go and get them into bed?”
“They’ll start on their own, but they’ll get distracted soon.”
Daniel smiled. “I think my mama used to say it was like trying to herd cats to get us all in bed on time. I won’t keep you long, but…” He reached for her hand, threading his fingers between hers. She swallowed hard. Oh Lord, it felt so good and scared her mindless at the same time. She stood as still as a statue in spite of her pounding heart.
“I’d like to see you, Beth.”
She bit her lip. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
He turned over her fingers, his thumb brushing the groove on her ring finger that was slowly disappearing. After ten years of wearing her wedding band, the sign was still there, even though the ring was not. “You’re not married.”
She shook her head. “He’s gone.” He raised a brow, and she had to say it, knowing the confusion not speaking plainly would cause. “He’s dead. He died in the accident that injured my leg.”
Her throat went tight. Images flashed through her mind, the icy road, the glaring lights. The pain.
The guilt.
His fingers stopped. “I’m sorry.”
He moved to pull away, and impulsively she resisted, maintaining a hold on his hand. Damn her indecision.
“It’s…okay. We were having troubles when he died, and I’m not grieving for him. Not really. I just don’t think it’s a great idea for you and me…” She couldn’t speak. What she wanted and what she should do—why was it so hard to know which was which?
He squeezed her fingers then let go and paced away. “There’s a whole lot I think you’re not saying right now. That’s fine. I’m still the man you met one night while you were in a drunken state and you don’t know me.”
“I wasn’t drunk.”
He chuckled and her face heated. “We call that liquid courage around here, darling, and you had some. I want you to know I was serious back then when I said I was interested in you. I’m even more interested, knowing you’re not a city girl living in some high-rise apartment hours away from me.”
“Maybe I’m not staying.”
“Then maybe while you’re here, we should spend some time together. I’m a good man, Beth. I’m not talking about taking over your life. I’m saying you intrigue me and you make my body ache. I think our attraction is something worth exploring.”
He moved closer. Her pulse pounded, and she tilted her head involuntarily to keep their eyes in contact.
Another step.
“I want to kiss you,” he growled. Their bodies were close enough their heat meshed, and a gasp of need escaped her throat. “Do you want to kiss me?”
Oh God. “I shouldn’t.”
“But do you want to?”
Desire and being responsible warred within her. Accepting his touch tonight would make it all that much harder to turn him down the next time.
He pressed closer yet, and their torsos connected, his groin rubbing her belly. Her back hit the wall as he caged her without using his hands. Their lips brushed, and she sucked in his air, the full body of his flavour rolling over her tongue like a fine wine. He kissed her tenderly, not the white-hot passion she’d replayed over and over in her mind from the bar scene, but a worshipful caress that started and finished with their lips.
When he pulled away his pupils were huge, his smile even wider.
“Good night, Beth.”
And he walked away, down the path that led into the trees.
Chapter Four
Daniel took his time making his way home, stopping by the swimming hole to stare into the swirling water. His thinking place—the spot he’d retreated to when the noise and bustle of being a part of huge family grew too much.
He’d needed to find quiet. The middle child of six, his daddy would joke, which meant he’d always had one or another of his brothers around. He’d learned to be the peacemaker, to walk the most serene path possible. At least in the public eye.
A ripple spread from the rock he tossed, small waves carrying across the slow-moving section of creek. Beth was a widow—he hadn’t expected that. Something in her actions in the bar had struck him hard, and he wanted so badly to explore the way she had let him take control of her in that hallway before the time and place had ripped them back to reality. She hadn’t acted like a grieving widow. She’d said as much, but she must have been with the man for a number of years. Lance had to be at least eight.
Heck, the boys were another whole issue. Daniel loved kids, but they weren’t what he was focusing on right now. It was the woman who fascinated him. Although, if he did get involved with Beth, she’d probably have all kinds of rules about not seeing the kids and keeping things secretive. He had a buddy in town who was dating a single mom, and he’d shared stories that reminded Daniel of having to crawl in the windows at two a.m. to avoid the wrath of his daddy for missing curfew.
He stood and dragged his fingers through his hair. Ahh, shit. The vision of Beth’s eyes haunted him. Why in the hell couldn’t he just walk away? Did he want to have to hide and balance dating and dealing with kids? The ache in his belly screamed far louder than the warning in his brain.
It wasn’t about being totally in lust, although getting to continue the adventure they’d interrupted so long ago excited him a lot. No, it was something else altogether. Something drew him and damn if he could deny the need.
Baggage and all, he was determined to see where this thing between them could go.
He strode through trees, twilight enough to guide his path. Before he even hit the porch, he smelled his daddy’s pipe, the aromatic tobacco lingering on the air. Daniel took the steps two at a time, dropping himself into one of the comfortable chairs on the deck.
“Beth and the boys get home okay?” Mike puffed his pipe then blew a long slow stream of smoke into the air.
Daniel shook his head. “You adopting more strays? They got home fine.”
His father rocked his chair a few times, the rhythm of the porch boards creaking soft and low. “She was surprised to see you today. You want to share what that’s about?”
Daniel coughed. Last thing he wanted was to tell the truth. “No.” His father raised a brow. “Sir.”
Mike didn’t say a word, just lifted his pipe to his lips. He smoked in silence, and Daniel tapped his fingers against his leg.
Damn it. His father did it to him every blessed time.
“I met her in Calgary when we took in a ship
ment of furniture in July. I hoped to see her again, but we…lost touch.”
Silence reigned. The fall noises were subtler than the spring. The crickets fell silent earlier as the temperature dropped quicker in the evening. The soft sounds of the animals in the coop and the barns carried on the air occasionally, but it was a calm night. Peace filled his soul, the motions of his father rocking, even and slow, like a familiar balm. In the distance, the sound of the guest cabin door closing rang out.
“That’ll be Blake saying good night to Jaxi. He’ll be here soon.” Mike pointed the mouthpiece of his pipe at Daniel. “I don’t know it all, but that lady in the Peter’s house needs some caring for.” Daniel moved to speak but his father held up a hand. “If you’re interested in her, you treat her nice. Understand, son?”
“I always treat ladies nice.”
The firm command in his father’s eyes made him hesitate. It was outrageous how he could be in his midtwenties and still reduced to a schoolchild by the man.
Blake wandered around the corner, his expression so dreamy Daniel couldn’t hold in his chuckle. His father joined in and Blake grinned sheepishly.
“I look like a love-struck fool, don’t I?”
The three of them laughed together, sitting on the porch in the full dark, and Daniel relaxed into the peace offered by his family. Finding Beth had turned all his previous plans to dust. Which was just fine—tomorrow was another day.
He could hardly wait.
Beth wandered the house after the boys finally settled. She wished it was as easy for her to put aside the excitement of the day and fade into sleep. The water boiled, and she made a cup of tea and carried it onto the porch to sip while she stared into the dark September sky.
Tell the truth, Beth. She sighed into her cup. Yeah, what she really wished for was someone to tuck her into bed.
And not just any someone—Daniel.
There was a part inside her that was scared to death of getting involved with a man again, but as her sister and parents had pointed out, not all men were like Samuel. Not everyone had the desire to control every facet of her life until she couldn’t breathe.
But her late husband hadn’t started that way either.
The next days passed in the usual blur of activity, getting the boys to the bus on time and rushing to her own teaching position. Arranging play dates and settling further into the community. She saw the Coleman boys around town occasionally, once Travis and once Blake, and both times her mind shot back to Daniel. No matter how full she made her to-do list, the damn man preoccupied her mind. After asking a few casual questions of her co-workers and other people she’d gotten to know, Daniel had come through with a squeaky-clean report.
Would getting involved with him really be so terrible?
By Friday, after a week’s worth of crappy sleep where she tossed and turned all night, she’d come to a conclusion. She could wear out the battery-operated boyfriend she’d finally had the courage to purchase, or she could find another way to deal with the lust driving her. She didn’t need a man in her life full time, but she sure could use one part time.
He’d offered. He was attracted to her. Maybe he’d even be willing to show her something other than sex in the missionary position.
As long as she was the one who got to call the shots, this could work out well for them both.
The house was quiet, the boys all off at a birthday party. She stared at her reflection in the mirror, tucking her T-shirt in a little more, buttoning and unbuttoning her sweater. It was one thing to decide she was ready for some casual sex, another to inform Daniel of his role in that decision. Beth plopped down on her bed and sighed, her reflection taunting her. Yeah, the sleepless nights really added to her appeal as a sex symbol, dark shadows under her eyes. It took a rush of sheer willpower to force herself out the door and across the small bridge before she could change her mind, again. She’d never know if she didn’t take the chance.
The barns and outbuildings on the other side of the trees were brightly lit, and she hesitated. She wasn’t sure if she’d even find him at home on a Friday night, but there was no way she was going to phone. If nothing else, she’d walk to the main ranch house, say hello to Marion and Mike then retreat to the Peter’s house to wait until it was time to pick up the kids.
She found him in the barn. Her throat and mouth flashed dry as she watched him rake something straw-like from a stall. The sleeves of his shirt were rolled up, and his biceps rocked with every pull of his arms. Tight muscles showed under the jeans, under his shirt—damn, he was just so good looking from boots all the way up to his slightly mussed hair. A throb hit between her legs and she bit her lip. There was nothing wrong with her physical response.
She took a deep breath. “Hey.”
The delight in his eyes stirred more fluttering in her belly. “Beth. I didn’t expect to see you here.”
She glanced around. None of the rest of the Colemans seemed to be near. “You got a minute? My boys are at a birthday party and I…” Holy cow, this was harder than she thought it would be. She forced her head up and met his gaze. “We need to talk.”
Daniel grinned, a panty-twisting expression that made her knees weak. He propped his rake against the wooden wall and tilted his head toward the door. “Come, we can talk while we walk.”
“No.” Her fingers were tangled together, and she dragged them apart, not sure where to put her hands. She felt about twelve years old with a first crush. “We’re private here—that would be better.”
He gestured to a bale. “Have a seat.”
She’d practiced this so it didn’t sound too desperate or sluttish. She hoped. “I was thinking about what you said the other day—”
“About us seeing each other?”
He sat beside her, their thighs touching as he faced the opposite direction. The scent of his skin rolled over her, the earthy fragrance of a man who’d done physical labour—raw and powerful. She barely stopped herself from leaning into him and offering her lips.
Instead, she nodded.
Daniel chuckled. “You’re getting all tongue-tied again, Miss Beth.”
“I’m interested in you, but I’m not looking for a long-term relationship.” The words burst out exactly how she’d rehearsed them. She twisted to face him, determined to finish. “I think we should just have some fun together.”
There. She’d said it. Maintaining eye contact was impossible, and she stared down at her fingers twisted together in her lap. He covered her hands with his, pulling one free.
“Now why did I think you were going to go and say something like that?”
He did? “I mean, you’re very attractive, but I don’t think I should get involved with anyone. It’s too soon and I don’t want—”
“The boys, right?”
Exactly. She relaxed a little. “I don’t think it’s fair for them to see me with another man.” Oh Lord, he was kissing her knuckles, his tongue teasing the seam between her fingers. The pulse between her legs quickened, and she had to force herself to stay motionless.
“Hmm. Makes sense, I guess.” He opened her palm and kissed it. “So, you’re interested in me sexually, but we can’t see each other in public. Is that what you’re saying?”
A shiver raced up her arm as he licked her wrist then gently sucked her skin.
“Yes. No. I mean…” How was she supposed to think with him touching her? When he leaned closer and nibbled on her earlobe? “Daniel, please.”
“I aim to.” He smoothed a hand over her shoulder, tangling his fingers in her hair. He pulled her head back so they could see into each other’s eyes. “You want to spend time with me.”
“Yes.”
“But the boys can’t know?”
She swallowed, watching his lips move closer. “Right.”
“Hmm.” He kissed her, lips faintly brushing back and forth as he directed the speed, the pressure. She slipped out her tongue to touch his bottom lip, and he captured her, sucking her tongu
e into his mouth. The kiss deepened, and she wrapped her arms around him, pressing as close as she could while seated side by side. The desire and need that had haunted her since the start of summer built to a high boil, and she gasped for air when he broke contact.
He traced a path over her body with his gaze. “How are we supposed to see each other without the little tykes catching on? And if they did find out, wouldn’t that cause more trouble?”
No. No more thinking about it. She didn’t want to analyse this anymore. She’d already had five restless nights trying to figure out how to satisfy her craving for him. “They won’t know. We’ll keep it quiet.”
He reached for her chin. “So what you’re saying, and pardon my crudeness, is you want a fuck buddy.”
She cringed. The phrase had skipped through her brain earlier, but it sounded far worse when said out loud.
Daniel stroked his thumb over her cheek. “You’re not looking for a friend with benefits because I ain’t allowed to be your friend.”
“It’s not that, it’s just—”
“Don’t know if I can do that.” She squeaked as he picked her up and placed her on his lap. “If all you’re looking for is some sex, I’m not interested. There’s a part of me that says, hell yeah, and I could be fucking you up against the wall in two minutes flat.”
Oh God, the images racing through her mind.
“But if you remember our conversation in the back hall of the bar, I don’t think you’re that type of woman. I’m not that kind of man. Honesty is one of the things that makes us who we are, and I’m going to be honest with you, darling.”
Beth held her breath as he cupped her face then stroked his other hand down her body intimately. He opened her legs and settled his fingers over her crotch. Could he feel how hot she was through her jeans?
“I find you very attractive, and I don’t just mean your body. I don’t know what troubles you’ve had in your past, but I hope we’ll get to talk them through at some point. So here’s what I suggest—you tell me if you agree. You and I do both. We fool around like you want, as long as you let us try to learn to be friends, like I want.”