“Ah.” She took a sip of her drink, thinking. “That seems odd. To do something you don’t really like.”
“How’s it different than half the adult population? And I didn’t say I didn’t like the people. I don’t like them pressing on me, the expectation of being on, being interesting, being the rock star they’ve built up in their heads.”
“Must be difficult to balance both ends,” Briar said with a frown.
I shrugged as I sipped. “This is good, but still not as good as my stuff. I’ll get you to Melbourne and show you how it’s done.”
Briar’s lips flipped up in a reluctant smile. “Sure. I didn’t think about you getting mobbed in there. I’m so sorry. The paparazzi are going to be looking for you now. I understand if you want to go back to your place, lie low.”
“Why ever would you apologize? I’m the one who ruined our coffee date. It’s the invasion of my space whenever I try to go out that I hate so much. I’m just a bloke who happens to play music. I want to take my girl to brekkie, same as the rest of the world.”
“I should’ve been smarter,” she fretted. “I really am sorry, Hayden.”
“You should quit worrying. Now, time for a shower so we can go up to the hospice.” I grabbed her hand, threading my fingers through hers. I pulled down my ball cap and put on my sunnies, pulling Briar back into the crowd.
Back at the hotel, I managed to answer a few e-mails from Flip and Ets, letting them know my mum’s situation was deteriorating. As I wrote them, I couldn’t stop picturing Briar naked under the hot water, soap bubbles dripping across her pale, soft skin as she showered just a few feet away from where I sat.
A ping sounded from my laptop and shook me from my fantasies. He’d responded immediately, in typical Ets fashion.
“See you met a bit of arse. Nice distraction. Hope she’s making the death-walk easier.”
I frowned at the screen. I wasn’t answering that shit. Next message was from Harry. I wasn’t sure he ever slept, not with the multiple stupid stunts Ets had pulled in the past year.
He wanted to know if he should send the label’s publicist into the fray on the pictures that were popping up—pictures of Briar and me. A few were from lunch yesterday. We appeared calm, a couple enjoying a meal. I liked that.
No one was mentioning my mum yet. I blew out a relieved breath.
More were from us today, both during and after our jog. Briar’s face was guarded, eyes downcast at everyone in the market. Except in one photo.
I held my breath, her eyes grabbing me even through the thousands of pixels on my laptop. Her desire was so obvious, I found my fingers on the cool screen before I’d realized I’d lifted them.
I was already a hot mess, and I hadn’t even slept with her yet.
I typed back to Harry. Let people know she’s important to me, and I’m asking for privacy during this difficult, personal time. Or whatever the hell you send out in a statement.
He responded almost instantly. One step ahead of you, mate. Press release is here. Give it a look-see, and I’ll send it out in ten. And you owe me for holding Ets back. He said to tell you to stop shagging the sheila and get your arse back on tour.
That wasn’t what Ets said—his language would’ve been much worse. Well, Ets could just wait.
Reading through, I noted that Briar was a close personal friend. A sardonic smile formed on my lips as I signed off on the release and closed the laptop.
Standing, I stretched, scratching my full belly. Dave’s muffin was good—made with those huge marionberries. No wonder Briar liked that place.
She stepped out of the bathroom, a hotel robe wrapped around her lean runner’s body. I’d missed her whole shower. Figured.
Even from the distance, I could smell the fresh, floral scent of her shampoo. I grinned as she took a brush out of her bag and began running it through the wet strands of her hair.
“All yours. I didn’t want to hog the space. I’ll be ready in fifteen minutes.”
“I won’t.” No way in hell I was going to be ready to leave with all her naked glory right here in front of me. Especially considering what awaited me. My lips curved up. This . . . this was a much, much better way to spend the morning.
She winced as the brush caught in her hair. I plucked the brush from her hand, falling victim to an overwhelming need to squeeze each gram of enjoyment from our time together. Maybe the expiration date on our shared time made each moment special.
I led her toward the big picture windows with great views of the sound. She glanced at me over her shoulder, and I pressed a soft kiss on the corner of her mouth. She inhaled, her body melting back into mine. Liked that, she did.
I grinned as I adjusted my grip on her. Taking my time, I placed more small kisses there.
She hummed deep in her throat, and I cupped her cheek. Pressing my lips to hers, I waited a heartbeat for her to part her lips. She did, and I slid my tongue into her mouth, lapping up her taste and fanning the flames of desire between us in long, lazy swipes of my tongue.
She moaned and struggled to turn fully into my arms. Blood pumping hot and thick through my veins, I stepped back and turned her until she once again faced the window. Lifting the brush, I swept it through her wet hair, letting it pull to the ends. Briar released a breath and relaxed.
“Mmm. You’re good at brushing my hair.”
I smiled at the slightly ragged quality of her voice.
“I’ve never done this before.” I paused, hesitant to reveal too much of myself. But this was Briar. We were in a space that no one could enter. So I said, “Hair brushing or courting a woman. Never wanted to.”
She turned her head a little, and I let the brush hover over her. Her blue eyes were dark. Her lips parted, a little swollen from my kiss. Her cheeks bloomed with soft pink color.
“I like firsts with you, Hayden.”
I smiled, surprised by how much I agreed with her. I handed her back the brush. “Me, too. I’m going to grab a shower.”
“Now?” she asked, surprised.
“Yeah,” I said. “I need to wash off all the sweat.”
“So—what? You kiss me like that then plan to leave me waiting?”
I raised an eyebrow, studying her flushed, strained face.
“Did you have a better idea?”
A smile curled across her luscious lips as she walked over to her bag, pulling out a pale pink bra. The sheer cups were edged with bright satin. She dropped the robe to the floor and picked up the matching panties.
I quit breathing. All that luscious, pale skin was on display. The long sweep of her spine flaring into her hips. The high, firm globes of her arse tapering into her trim thighs.
My eyes lifted to her back and I waited, breath bated deep in my chest, for her to turn around. I wanted her breasts in my hands, my tongue rolling her nipple into a tight bud.
She slid her panties up those white thighs. I groaned as the soft fabric cupped her bum. She put on her bra, hooking it quickly. She turned toward me, her long fingers cupping the outer edge of her bra. My mouth went dry.
“I’ll just finish getting ready. Why don’t you hop in the shower?”
Some sound came out of my mouth, something between a gasp and a groan. Briar smiled, her fingers running toward the top of her breasts, right at the edge of her bra.
Chapter 16
Briar
I’d never been looked at the way he was staring at me. He made me feel sexy. Needed. Which made me needy in return. I shook my hair back over my shoulders and he gasped. Stepping nearer, I was close enough to see how dilated his pupils were. But he stepped back, hands shoved into the pockets of his sweats.
“What’s wrong?”
He’d pulled back at Dave’s shop, eyes glazing over and body language requesting space. I’d hoped he’d be better away from the crowd, but something in his attitude was still off.
“I’ll grab some clean clothes. Be a second.”
I gripped my fingers in his pullove
r. “Hayden. Are you angry with me? For taking you to the Market?”
I stumbled back when he swung toward me. His jaw was tight, lips compressed. Sighing, scrubbing his hands through his hair. He dropped his fingers to the upper swell of my chest, trailing them down over the cup of my bra where my fingers had been a moment before. Now that he was touching me, I could feel the need pouring off him, feeding mine.
“No, Briar. I’m not angry with you. I’m frustrated with myself. This thing we’re starting—like you said, it’s deep. I don’t want to hurt you. I . . . ” He blew out a breath. “It’s just more real now that I’m here. The idea that I could end up like her. When I think about the episodes, the anger . . . I could pull someone down into that pit with me. I can’t do that to you. I just can’t.”
I stepped in, ignoring his grunt. Wrapping my arms around his waist, I laid my head on his chest. He pulled me tight enough I struggled for a full breath. This demon he was fighting, his mother’s illness and the old hurts it had caused, was winning.
“I’m happy to go visit your mom and Rosie. You can stay here or head over to the studio. Bill was serious about you using the key he gave you. Go bang out your aggression on the keys.”
A laugh rumbled up his chest before spilling out his mouth.
“Thanks for that, love. There’s a much better way to bang out my aggression, but I really want to woo you.”
“Why?”
“For the first time in just about forever I’ve met someone who sees me. Who cares about me. And I want to make sure you understand it’s reciprocated.”
“I know you care about me.” I sucked in a breath. “You can care about me more. In bed.”
“My, you’re primed.” He leaned down and kissed my hairline, just above my forehead. “I’m getting you all covered in my sweat.”
“I like your sweat,” I panted.
“And I like you. More than I should. Let me go, Briar.”
I obeyed, wondering if I’d just lost him completely.
Something showed on my face. Probably my fear. Hayden cupped my cheeks in both of his hands, pressed his lips against mine hard enough to clank teeth. His tongue was inside my mouth, ravenous. I gripped his hair near his nape and held on. He pulled away his lips on a groan that sounded almost like a sob. His lips trailed down my neck and I arched into him, my body more than ready to comply.
“Bloody hell, Briar. I can’t stay away from you. And I should. I know I should. We’re meeting at a time that’s all about strong emotions. Those same reasons for getting together now will rip us up when these stolen moments unwind.”
“I don’t want you to stay away,” I whispered. “Please don’t shut me out.”
“I can’t seem to, and that’s the hell of it.” His tongue caressed the skin along my collarbone. “I’m going to hurt you. I realized how much it’s going to hurt me to hurt you at the Market and again while brushing your hair. I like spending time with you, Briar. But I have to leave. Soon.”
I cupped his cheek, waiting until he met my eyes. His swirled with dangerous emotions—too many to count. They mirrored my own. Which was why I’d tried to back out of dinner earlier. Unfortunately, at the Market I’d realized just how deep I was already in this relationship with Hayden.
Time to make a choice—one I hated making for myself. But we were both old enough to know that our emotions were tangling, and that was enough to give us pause.
Hayden and I shared more of ourselves in a short period of time than I’d ever shared with Ken in all my years with him. I wasn’t playing safe; I wasn’t pulling back and hiding behind my normal cloak of numbness. Neither was he. The result was electrifying and terrifying.
He waited, breath choppy.
“No.” My voice was firm. “You’d hurt me more if you pushed me away now.” I couldn’t have spoken a truer statement. “Hayden, I’ve been around the block, I understand this is short-lived. You have a life somewhere else. Mine’s here. But this is the time we have together. Leaving is going to be painful no matter what. Regrets will just make me feel worse.”
He stared into my eyes, his still dark with anger and disappointment. We stayed like that, me in just my lingerie, his arms wrapped tight around me as I curved into his body.
“You are one smart lady. Or maybe I’m too confused from how much I want you to muster a logical response.” He buried his nose in my cleavage.
“Nothing’s stopping you.” He looked up at me, and I met his gaze, holding mine level and sure.
His mouth settled over mine, softer this time, reverent. He backed me across the room, his kisses light but filled with emotion, his hands sliding from my hips to my waist, up my rib cage, to my breasts. His thumbs flicked across my aching nipples, and I arched forward plastering my body to his.
“Oh, please.”
“You want this? Me, inside you?”
“God, yes.”
He pushed me back against the mattress, which caught me behind the knees. I sprawled back, clawing at his shoulders as I fell. He smirked, eyes darkening.
“I’m deciding what to take off first.”
“Don’t tease me.”
“Yes, lots of teasing. It’s the anticipation that’ll make this so much better.”
I arched my hips off the bed, my fingers fumbling toward the elastic of his running pants. “Now. I want you now.”
“Bossy.” He sat back on his heels, nostrils flaring at the high-cut silk-and-lace panties playing peekaboo with my sex. “I like it.”
He climbed over me, arms tensed to keep from putting any weight on me. I knew he was going to try to drive me crazy, and I didn’t think I could stand a long buildup. I wrapped my legs around his waist. I pushed off my far shoulder, landing on top of Hayden with a smug smirk.
His astonishment quickly turned darker, more sensual. “That was bloody sexy.”
“You’re sexy.”
His hands palmed my bottom, thumbs smoothing in long strokes over the soft material. I leaned down, my smile pressed to his as we kissed again. And again. And again.
“You pinned me. What next? I’m yours for the taking, love.”
Oh, that accent.
“Clothes. Off.”
“This is your cricket match.”
I leaned back to frown in confusion.
“It means do as you will,” he said with a chuckle. “Condoms are over there.” He waved vaguely. “I should get one.”
He walked across the room and I licked my lips. As soon as he was back, I pushed his pullover and the still-damp T-shirt up over his ribs. I kissed my way up, my tongue learning each of his ribs, the dip between the two sides. I trailed my lips over the thick ridges of muscles that led down to his belly button. He hissed out a curse when my tongue delved into the small indention.
I squealed as I whirled, ending up under him again. “Too slow,” he mumbled against my lips. Pulling my hands up over my head, his mouth sealed over my left nipple through my bra. “Sweet Briar. You feel better than I imagined. Taste sweeter than I hoped.”
“Please.”
“Ah, you like me in charge.”
“Yes,” I whispered.
He dipped his sun-kissed head. “Good.” He nipped my shoulder, teeth scraping over the delicate skin there. I moaned, arching into him. We rolled again and he ran his hands down my sides to grip my hips.
“You’re so responsive. That’s bloody hot.”
I wanted to tell him I’d never flamed this fast before. “Less talk,” I panted.
Hayden leaned up, abs flexing—dear heaven—in a drool-worthy crunch to help me pull off his pullover and shirt. I ran my fingers down the inside of his arms and the outside of his ribs. He shivered. My fingers slid in a whisper-soft caress down over his stomach. We both moaned as my fingers slid lower, under the waistband of his sweats.
He fumbled, gripping my fingers as I trailed them lower. I huffed as he slid our hands up our bodies. He pulled his mouth from my neck.
I threaded my finge
rs through his hair, thrilled, as I kissed him. Long, hard, deep, just like I wanted him inside me. Digging my toes into the back of his sweats, I yanked them down. He pulled back, surprise and pride lighting his eyes.
“Good trick.”
He toed off his shoes and shimmied out of his pants, sliding back up my naked limbs. My bra disappeared and I gasped at the sensation of skin touching skin. Hayden was hot. His skin sizzled against mine, and I pressed into him. More. I just needed more.
He went willingly as I rolled, but we’d misjudged the end of the bed. I yelped as we fell. He twisted, taking the brunt of the fall. We landed in a tangle of limbs.
“You okay?”
“Fine,” I said. “Don’t stop.”
“Wasn’t planning to.”
He pushed my panties down over my hips. He palmed my hipbone, his fingers finding the smooth flesh low between my legs. I arched upward as he slid his fingers lower, delving between my slick lips.
“Bare. Crikey, you’re killing me. I’ve got to see this.”
He pulled back, eyes traversing the length of my flushed body. I writhed as he pressed the pad of his thumb to my clitoris, two fingers sinking in deep, past the knuckle. I bit my lip, twisting into his hand and then away. I needed more of him.
Rotating his fingers, he rubbed against the front wall of my sex. His thumb turned a slow circle and my body bowed. I clawed at his shoulders as the ripples started deep inside, building, my body bucking with the strength of the release.
He ripped open the condom wrapper and slid into me just as the last tremors eased through my body. My muscles tensed immediately, primed and begging for more.
Hayden rose up on his elbows and cupped my cheeks, his fingers buried deep in my hair. “You feel amazing.”
“Mmm.”
“Did I leave you speechless, love?” he asked, leaning forward to press kisses to the corner of my mouth.
“You left me both relaxed and wound tight. You feel right inside of me.”
I gripped his forearms as he pulled out. I lifted my hips up, but I was pinned under him. I waited, breathless, quivering. He slid back into me. Each stroke was strong, sure, and nudged me back toward the pinnacle I’d reached just moments before.
Between Breaths (The Seattle Sound Series Book 2) Page 10