Carnegie turned and looked around, long enough for Tye to get a succession of good shots. She looked over at him innocently unaware of his actions. She smiled at him as she made her way to the lifts. He smiled back. She had just smiled for the camera, one of the nicest things you could do for a photographer in his situation was exactly that.
He waited for the lift doors to close, then he quickly finished off his coffee and made his way back to his room, concealing at all times his camera from view of any staff. Once inside he quickly downloaded the photos onto his computer. He attached them to an email for Richard. His message was short, although it was sweet enough.
Her name is Carnegie Lane.
Carnegie stood at his door. She didn’t knock, she just looked at it, wondering if she should knock, or turn and run. Then the door opened and standing in front of her was the living embodiment of that perfect poster hanging on her daughters’ wall. She smiled a little looking for the first word to come out of her mouth.
“Well…are you coming in? I don’t bite.” He said and broke the ice for her. He was used to it. At least she didn’t start screaming.
“Yep, I am.” She said. ‘Wish you would bite, I could live with the scars…’ She thought as she walked through to the lounge room. The unrestricted view of the beach from his room was amazing.
“That view is great… How was your flight?” She asked casually, attempting to take it all in her stride.
“Long but worth it, it’s nice here. This is the first time in a long time I’ve been somewhere without a crowd. The only other place I get that is at Kats in London.”
He walked over and stood beside her. Both of them watching as the first of the afternoon shadows appeared across the ocean, dimming it slightly, as if it were being operated by a switch.
“Thanks for coming Carnegie.” He said gently.
He was studying her carefully. Everything about her was just as he suspected. She looked different from her photo although not unrecognizably so. In real life, she looked softer.
“It’s a pleasure to be here, as for thanking someone, I can’t begin to thank you for what you are doing and for your support. Oh talking about support… I have something for you.”
Carnegie reached down into her bag and brought out a typed manuscript. She also put the bottle of wine on the table, hoping he would open it soon.
“Wow.” He said with awe as he picked up the manuscript, holding it in his hand like a precious document. “Impossible Things…I love this story so much.”
He ran his hand gently over the title, reading the dedication to the song again. It really was a lovely set of words.
“You know, I sang this song for you at one of my concerts, the night after I read this.” It all came back to him strongly, all the emotions he felt.
“Really? Thanks, I love that song. I love that band!” Carnegie said genuinely, chuffed at the idea he had dedicated a song to her, let alone a Cure song.
“What made you write it? What gave you the idea?” he asked, changing her thinking a little from the direction it was heading.
“Well, it’s strange how it happened.” Carnegie sat down, choosing her words on this carefully. “I dreamt it. Sort of…I saw an accident, and a guy running to a girl, trying to save her I guess, trying to fix her… But she died.”
Carnegie was thinking about the devastation she felt at the time, unable to wake up, yet feeling so horribly sad for both of them. Then she continued.
“He didn’t give up though, he found another way to be with her. That I guess is what the story eventually became. The ability to wish for impossible things. By wishing enough you can make them possible.”
“And…the girl in the story, Taylor? How did you find the name?”
“She told me her name. I know how that sounds, although it’s the truth.” Carnegie looked at him when she said that. He was looking deep into her eyes.
There was silence between them for a moment. He was searching her, looking for an answer to something he had no question to ask. The name Taylor in his life had been significant once. He recognized there was no possible way she could have known that. It was just a strange coincidence.
He walked over to the window and stared at the ocean. Carnegie was behind him sitting on the lounge, summing up his perfection. He had perfect skin, he was perfectly groomed. She felt insignificant to him in a million ways. Yet, she stayed. Curious as to why he wanted her here.
Nate turned around and grabbed two wine glasses.
“You hungry?” He asked as he handed her a room service menu. “I’ll order something if you like, there is a tapas in there that looks good, if you’re into it.”
He handed Carnegie a glass of wine. She sipped it… appreciating the fact she just spent $35.00 on that bottle. Usually, when she bought herself a bottle of red, it was a $5.00 brandless skin, so spending this much, was a treat.
“That’s a great drop, where is that one from?” He asked, appreciating the flavor of the Merlot.
“Margaret River in Western Australia. Nice wine from there.” She took another sip.
“Well, I’m really pleased you’re here Carnegie Lane. I think you are a star, and one day soon, you’re going to know it too.” Nate clinked his glass to hers as he sat back down next to her. She already had her feet up on the coffee table, he did the same.
She smiled and clinked back. “I hope I do alright. I have fallen in love with my characters you know… so it’s for them I hope I do well.”
“Oh it’s good. Your characters are believable in an unbelievable situation. Strangely though, I don’t think it’s impossible, what you have written. It’s oddly calming to think it possible.”
“It would be nice to think so. Writing the book was therapy for me. For so long I was a wife and a mother, then suddenly, I was no longer a wife, I was left with being an inadequate mother. I became half of what I was at the time, which in reality was only a 10th of who I am.”
Carnegie was staring out at the ocean again. Watching the last of the sun cling to the water, like hands held by another hanging over a cliff, pleading not to let them go.
“So what is it you want Carnegie. What are you looking for?” Nate had a good point. She hadn’t allowed herself to ask the question.
“I’m looking for me, I’m looking for who I was becoming when I stopped everything to become someone else. There is a moment that I made a choice and walked left instead of right at a crossroads. I want to explore the other option, the right option… the creative option.”
“Well, if that’s what you wanted to do, you’ve certainly made a great start.”
He felt comfortable in her presence. He could feel she was nervous, but he knew it wouldn’t take her long now, she would settle down.
“Tapas will do fine.” She said, still watching the water.
“Tapas it is.” He picked up the phone and called reception.
It didn’t take long for her to settle in and become truly comfortable in his company. Hard to say if it was the wine, or him, yet time passed as if it had never begun. Carnegie and Nate found a million things in common. They talked about TV Shows, movies, dreams, music, childhood fears and strange things they used to do.
They found common ground in the sadness of the state of the world, wanting to make a difference. Nate told her about his charities, how he helped people and animals. Carnegie told him about her kids, and what it was like to raise them. He explained the emotion of being on stage, performing to so many people. She told him about her pain and sense of rejection, having been so close to it a long time ago, and now being unrecognizable to all the bands that she supported. How the sense of loss never took away from her belief in the music, and she was happy for them.
The hours flew by and they were oblivious to the world outside of that room. Carnegie had found the sounding pole to her life, and Nate had found a friend. They laughed together and shared the spark of a moment that came from remembering something. He would close his eyes whe
n she described to him what it was like to hold a baby in your arms for the first time. She would close her eyes as he described singing a song he wrote to five thousand people.
He lived what she had always wanted, and she lived, part of what he sacrificed in order to have it. It was two in the morning, when they finished off the second bottle of wine. They were, by this time, lying on the bed watching Star Trek on TV. Somewhere in the middle of the show, between a panicked Dr Spock and a time warp, they fell asleep. Entwined in an innocent embrace, neither wanting more from the other and yet, neither prepared to let go.
Nate Bowman, for the first time in a long time, had in his arms a woman who held no expectation of him what so ever. She wasn’t a beauty queen, she wasn’t a movie star and she had no family fortune that tied her to the crowd. She was real, and she was special. He held onto every second as if they were the most precious things in the world.
The seconds became minutes and minutes became hours. At 6 am her phone rang. Nate was still asleep. She answered it as quietly as she could. It was Sienna, wanting her breakfast and wondering where she was. Writing a note, and nursing a partial headache she slipped out of the room. She had a grin from ear to ear. It was the best night she had had in nearly twenty years. Even though she had some explaining to do at home, nothing mattered enough to ruin her moment, nothing happened, and no promises were made. She recognized what Nate needed was someone to talk to, someone uncomplicated. It was exactly what she had been looking for. Together, in their differences, they were perfect.
So today, was a great day. Today she let go of a tragedy in her life just a little and allowed herself to believe she was worthy.
Suddenly, and unexpectedly, Carnegie Lane, mother of four, idol to inanimate objects, and almost Author, had an unlikely… new best friend. And it felt great.
Another turning point a fork stuck in the road
Time grabs you by the wrist directs you where to go
So make the best of this test and don’t ask why
It’s not a question but a lesson learned in time
It’s something unpredictable but in the end is right
I hope you had the time of your life!
“Time of your life”
Written by Billie Joe Armstrong
Greenday – Nimrod Album 1997
9
Carnegie walked into her house and stood before the judicial panel that were waiting for answers.
“Where have you been mum?” Sienna asked with her hands on her hips. “I need my rice bubbles.” It was the best she could do. And she expected it to burn guilt into the absolute core of her mother’s soul.
“Get your own Sienna, rice bubbles and milk isn’t a complicated thing to do.” Carnegie had never told her to do that, ever. Now seemed like a perfect time for a change. Sienna said nothing, she was too shocked to even consider an answer.
“Mum… Where were you? I thought you were coming home last night.” Sobian asked as she doubled back to the kitchen and got her sister rice bubbles in a bowl.
“Sorry, I fell asleep.” Carnegie replied, as she walked into the kitchen and put the kettle on. Sobian looked at her out of the corner of her eye. Carnegie was vague in the way she matter of factly offered no answers or explanations. Other than to say what was clear to them all.
“Where? Is what we really want to know.” She walked over to the TV, and turned it on. The news of the day had begun, and one of the headlining stories was about Sheeva’s Disciples who had just arrived at Brisbane airport. The Bass player, Ryan, was being interviewed and attempting to dodge questions about the apparent ‘missing’ lead singer.
“Oh my god! Nate Bowman is missing!” The twins were mortified.
“He’s not missing.” Carnegie said defensively, then decided to shut up.
“He’s not on the plane, what if he was kidnapped by a crazy fan?” Sobian had a million stupid ideas brewing in her mind. Carnegie began to giggle. It was all too funny.
“Mum…where were you last night?” Olivia looked at her mother, she was unusually happy, strangely calm, and was giggling at seven in the morning.
“I just went to a friend’s place, that’s all. I fell asleep in the middle of Star Trek if you must know.”
“What friend? When did you make a friend here?” Olivia continued her questioning. This wasn’t normal behavior.
“A while ago, just get off it. Get dressed for school. You’re going even if you think you’re not.”
The news of the missing Nate Bowman continued.
“Do you still talk to him mum?” Sobian asked, genuinely hoping her mother could solve the mystery of her missing idol.
“Yep.” She said, yet offered nothing more.
“Then can you call him, and ask him where he is?” She said innocently.
“Nope.” Came the reply.
“Why not?”
“Cause…he’s not missing, he is exactly where he planned to be right now, and tomorrow night he will be performing at that concert.” Carnegie took her coffee then went and sat on the lounge. She watched with some interest the commotion at Brisbane airport, noting how tired those poor band members were, and how unavoidable the publicity was.
“Oh no! The concert! We never did get tickets did we?” Olivia said, feeling somewhat dejected.
“Yeah well, I still don’t want to go, what if one of those stupid girls says something to him about the email. I hate this place so much.” Sobian was starting her down in the dumps moment again. Carnegie decided to halt it, right then and there.
“You are going, we are all going. I think it’s time you had a little faith in your mother actually. As for those girls, if I hear them say anything, I’ll slog ‘em for ya!” She grinned, knowing full well that wouldn’t be necessary by the end of the night.
“Mum. You don’t understand. We told everyone that you were friends with him and now, we just look like idiots. I get that you talked to him once, maybe twice, but it’s because of his sister that you even know who he is, it’s not like your friends with Nate Bowman, like… dream on.” Sobian was so negative sometimes. Carnegie understood why though, it wasn’t like there had been much to hold onto lately.
The conversation was full of comedy to her. All she wanted to do was to tell those girls exactly what had happened. She knew she couldn’t. This surprise was turning out to be almost cruel.
Sienna broke the moment and allowed room to change the subject, getting the kids back on track to be ready for school was all she wanted to do.
“Mum... I got nits again.” She said scratching her head wildly.
“Since when?” Carnegie asked with frustration.
“I don’t know, I just found one… look!” She handed her mother a perfect specimen. “Biggen ain’t he!” She had a smile from ear to ear.
Carnegie just sighed.
“I’ll get some stuff today, whatever you do, don’t scratch your head at school and if you have to scratch, try to make it look like your thinking.” She grabbed a hair brush and brushed the untamed jungle of her daughters head.
Her own began to itch. She had found over time that her sudden itch at the mention of nits was psychosomatic. Time was getting away, she had 20 minutes to have those four kids perfect. Her headache was subsiding, although she was slightly absent, in a different way than she had been. The phone rang, she chose to ignore it, knowing the answering machine would pick it up. Connor was ready, Sienna was ready, the bigger girls were questionably ready, still dragging their heels as they did. Still wondering where their mother was, and with whom.
They could tell that whatever had happened last night had put her in a strangely interesting mood. They were also concerned about Nate Bowman, which was bound to be the topic of the day at school. They both knew that they would be wearing the brunt of the jokes as a result of it.
Their mother’s voice on the machine faded and beeped, allowing the message of whoever was calling to be heard. It was that moment that froze everyone in the hou
se on the spot, totally unable to move.
“Hi Carnegie, it’s Nate, I didn’t even hear you leave this morning, I was so asleep. Thanks for a great night…I had a fantastic time. Call me, when you’re organized, we’ll try for a late breakfast and get some time in before the rest of the crew arrive what do you say? Well… later babe.” The beeping of the phone indicated the call was over. Other than the television, still speculating on where Nate Bowman might be, the house was silent.
Sobian and Olivia were wide eyed with their mouths hanging as if their bottom jaw was broken. Sienna and Connor really didn’t care and waltzed out the door, heading for the bus stop. It was only the intrigue of the accent that held their attention in the first place.
“You… were with Nate Bowman last night?” Sobian felt like her mother above all those girls, had just performed the greatest betrayal of them all.
“It’s not what you think…” She replied quickly.
“Then what am I thinking? Because there is something fundamentally wrong in you getting that message, and us having been the babysitters at the time.” Her hands were on her hips. Olivia was still stuck to the floor in the same position.
“Well, here is what I think. Go to school. And don’t say a word. Do you get that Sobian?” She had never heard her mother be so direct, not even when she was angry.
“I suppose.” She said, still wanting to know exactly what was going on.
“Olivia? Do you understand?” Carnegie needed a promise from both of them.
“Wow… what’s he like mum? Wow… that is seriously cool.”
“Olivia!!” She said again, a little frustrated.
“Yeah, OK... No one would believe us anyway. But that is…way cool mum.” She couldn’t get over it.
“So, do we get to meet him, or are you going to keep him all to yourself?” Sobian still had her hands on her hips. Her sister might have recognized the cool side of things, but she had to make it through the jealousy first.
The Unexpected Life of Carnegie Lane Page 10