My parents hadn’t bought it for a minute. After they left Julia’s house they went to the police. They demanded an investigation and filed a missing person’s case. The police investigated. My dad’s friend Patrick had Julia brought in. They questioned her for hours about every detail of what had happened.
They questioned her mom and dad. Her mom remembered seeing me that night but hadn’t been sure I’d stayed over. Her dad hadn’t been home that night. A neighbor however had been outside letting their dog pee when they’d heard screams coming from the house. They’d thought it was strange but hadn’t called it in.
Julia cracked when they continued to put pressure on her. She told them Lynn had made her do it. That she hadn’t wanted to trick me. Lynn had manipulated her and threatened to hurt her if she didn’t go alone.
I told them it was bullshit. That she’d told Lynn to keep me quiet when I started screaming. My parents told me that a day or two after Julia told the truth she’d tried to hurt herself. Her parents had her committed and she was getting treatment. I didn’t feel bad for her. She was probably more upset that Lynn hadn’t come back for her then with what had happened to me. I told them I didn’t want to see her ever again. They agreed with my decision.
When we left the hospital the next day there were reporters everywhere. My story had gotten out and was all over the news. Reporters wanted to talk to me but my parents kept them back.
I learned that Lynn still hadn’t been found. I was disappointed and scared but assured myself it was okay. He might not have been found yet because he was dead. I’d seen how wrecked the cabin had been. I could only imagine how messed up Lynn was.
At the airport we learned there were reporters in front of our house as well. My parents had my Aunt move my brothers to a hotel. We flew back and joined them. I continued to get treatment for my injuries as we waited for things to die down.
Nearly a week later Lynn was found walking naked and incoherent on the side of the road. It was breaking news and all anyone could talk about. My parents didn’t let us watch but I managed to get hold of a newspaper a few days later.
I learned Lynn wasn’t nineteen, he was twenty-three. I realized he’d faked his age to get close to me. They said he’d had to be taken to the hospital. He’d showed signs of being beaten and possibly tortured. He was nearly catatonic and only seemed capable of saying “who.”
I was reminded of that day in the cabin. Just after the bang when Lynn had asked the man that had saved me, “Who the fuck are you?” He was probably still wondering who he was. I was too.
A few weeks later Lynn was deemed unfit for court. They committed him to a mental institution. I hoped I’d never have to see him again.
Things didn’t die down over the next few weeks. Nearly everyone that had known Lynn and me was interviewed. They all had their own version of events. Their own two cents to give on what had happened.
Pictures from the inside of the cabin were leaked and people speculated about what had happened. They thought a vigilante was behind this. Some people wanted the police to go after them. The police contacted us and wanted me to come down for a police sketch.
They were looking for the man that had saved me. My parents didn’t think it was right that they were going after him. I told them as much as I could remember about the man and was almost glad now that I hadn’t seen his face. I hoped they wouldn’t find him and that, if they did, they wouldn’t charge him for saving me.
After a few months the media attention became too much and my parents put the house up for sale. We moved away from that town and tried to disappear from the limelight. I even changed my name. My parents wanted me to have a fresh start somewhere, to be able to forget what had happened. But I knew that was impossible.
I would never forget Julia’s betrayal of our childhood friendship. She’d destroyed a lifetime of trust over a man she’d known for a month. I would never forget how people had refused to believe me about what Lynn had been doing to my life. I would never forget what Lynn himself had done to me, what he had taken from me.
But most of all, I would never forget the man who had saved me. The man from my dreams. The man who wanted nothing to do with me. The man who never turned around. I would never forget the beauty of his dreams, though try as I might I didn’t have that dream again. I never got to thank him but now that I knew he was real...I vowed one day I would. And one day… I would ask him why.
The End
Sample Chapter If I Pass This Way Again
Almost home...She was almost...home...
Mandy Brack repeated the mantra in her head in hopes it would motivate her. It was barely two in the afternoon and she was freezing. It was her least favorite season, winter. It always put her in a dreadful mood. She didn’t look forward to it and when it came she couldn’t wait for it to be over.
She’d been born in Maloppa, Tentive. They didn’t have winters there. They had the season of course but it never snowed. No she didn’t experience her first real winter until she was eight, when her family moved to Mellbri, Inopsis. She’d been excited having seen snow on the TV and in movies. Everyone always told her it was wonderful. She never expected it to be so cold and make her feel...so strange.
Her first snowfall she’d passed out and gotten sick. She was plagued with strange feverish dreams and nightmares that she didn’t understand. Her parents had worried about her. They had taken her to several doctors and while they treated her sickness, it didn’t fully go away until the spring. As soon as the snow had gone...
The next winter as soon as the snow started to fall, she got sick once again and the strange dreams and nightmares returned. Thankfully her cold only lasted two months. However the strange dreams lasted the entire season. Every winter the sickness and the dreams would come and every spring they would go away. Thankfully as time went on they became more manageable.
Now at eighteen she’d only get a normal seasonal cold. The dreams and nightmares still remained but she’d learned to ignore them for the most part. Still Mandy had been hoping to avoid the winter all together this year. She’d graduated high school just last spring and had been looking forward to going someplace warm for college.
She’d won a scholarship and had been accepted into a selective art program that only accepted 25 members each year. All summer long she’d been drawing, and honing her skills as much as she could wanting to do well but a month before summer ended she found out the scholarship had fallen apart. She’d scrambled trying to find the money to go but most everything was past the deadline.
She tried to get student assistance but found her parents made too much money for her to qualify, yet they made too little to really help out. She called the program and told them what happened she was hoping they might be able to hold her spot until she could get the money. They told her they couldn’t but she could reapply next year and if she got in then she’d have a spot again.
Mandy had been heartbroken she’d cried for nearly a week before she finally accepted it. She understood things didn’t always work out...Things didn’t always go the way you wanted but was determined not to give up. She figured out how much money she would need for a year of college and then got a job at a cafe.
She worked through the fall and with tips and overtime she almost had enough to cover a full semester. She planned to work the rest of the year and apply for the art program and scholarships in the spring. Hopefully she’d get in again and have the money she’d need to finally go to college...and if she didn’t... Mandy sighed and tried not to think about it. She didn’t like to think about what would happen if she failed again...
She tried to stay positive as her boots crunched and sloshed about in the snow. At least her parents were still letting her live with them rent free. Some parents made their kids pay rent even if they were saving up to go to college. She also had a job she liked and because she opened she got off early and now had the rest of the day to do what she wanted. Once she got home...
Mand
y turned a corner and smiled. She planned to make herself some hot chocolate with the tiny marshmallows and maybe some whip cream, if they had any. She’d also make some cinnamon toast, or tiger toast as her mother called it, to go along with it. Then she’d curl up in bed and get warm. She’d pull out the latest book she’d been reading and find out what happened.
Before she went to bed last night she’d stopped on a cliff hanger. Gwen had just found out that her brother was the murderer. So much had been going on. Mandy wanted to keep reading but she had to get up by four and didn’t want to risk oversleeping. All day she’d been thinking about the book and wanted to know what had happened. She almost regretted not bringing the book to work with her, but she couldn’t risk running over on her breaks or not paying attention on the bus.
She didn’t want to mix her stops up. It had happened more than once especially when she was tried and she didn’t want to risk being outside, in the snow, any longer then she had to. So far she hadn’t gotten a cold and was going to do her best not to get one this year. She even got the flu shot.
On autopilot Mandy turned, reaching out she opened her gate. She walked through and shut it behind her before walking down the stone path to the wooden steps that led up to the large covered porch. As she climbed she dug in her pocket for her house keys. She pulled them out and went to unlock the door. Only she paused when she saw the door handle.
Something about it was different. The handle was silver instead of gold. Her eyes wandered looking at the rest of the door. Wait, this wasn’t right. Her house didn’t have a screen door... Mandy froze as panic struck her. She covered her mouth and her ‘Almost Home’ mantra was quickly replaced with ‘Please...please...don’t let this be happening again! Please...please...don’t let this be happening again!’
Taken aback she nearly slipped as she stumbled backwards on the deck and down the wooden stairs. She took in the house fully, knowing it all too well. It was a beautiful house, two stories with a large fenced yard. It almost reminded her of a doll house. Yes it was quite a beautiful house but it wasn’t hers...
She turned away from it quickly walking back the way she’d come. She opened the gate and closed it behind her. She made her way onto the sidewalk once more. She looked around upset and embarrassed. She checked to see if anyone had seen her. Thankfully she didn’t see anyone. She furrowed her brow before she began to walk.
Instead of retracing her steps she crossed a street wanting to just get away from the house. When she was more than a block away Mandy stopped. She touched her gloved hand to her forehead. Then she removed her glove and touched her hand to her forehead. Did she have a fever...was she coming down with a cold...or had she not gotten enough sleep...Why was this happening to her.
Today had been a busy day but still. She didn’t think she let herself space enough to end up back here. She let out a heavy sigh; her warm breath came out around her in a puff of smoke. Another thing that came with the winter...the wandering. It didn’t happen right away. Not until she was twelve. At first she’d just take a wrong turn here or there and find herself getting lost. Sometimes she’d get distracted or zone out and wind up getting on the wrong bus. She’d eventually catch herself though and correct where she was going.
It only happened a few times over the years and only in the winter. It took her until her sophomore year in high school before she realized she was going somewhere. It was normal to get lost or even a little disoriented sometimes but people usually ended up in different places. For Mandy it was always the same place. Maple Street...If she was lucky she’d catch herself before she got there. If she wasn’t it was nearly half an hour out of her way.
One day she’d casually mentioned it to her parents and told them about her theory. She thought that when she got lost she was going somewhere on purpose. Her father had joked if she was going somewhere on purpose, she wasn’t really getting lost. Her mother had worried and wanted her to see someone. Mandy was worried they might think she was crazy. She decided to try and handle it on her own. It only happened every so often and nothing bad ever happened. It was just inconvenient.
The winter of her junior year she did her best to focus and not zone out. She managed to catch herself every time it happened. She thought maybe she’d beat it; however her senior year it ended up happening five times and twice in one month. She now ended up in front of a house at 221 Maple Street. It was a beautiful two story house, with a large fenced yard. She’d always caught herself at the gate...but this time...this time she’d made it to the front door.
She had no idea what it was about that house that made it so special. She didn’t know why time and time again she was coming here. What was she going to do if she didn’t stop? She’d made it all the way to the door this time...What if she tried to break in. Mandy shook her head thinking she was going mad. Slowly she started to walk again; the snow was now coming down heavily.
She knew she couldn’t ignore this. Not this time. She thought she could stop it...She thought she could beat it but clearly she couldn’t. She needed help before something bad did happen, before she got herself in trouble. Mandy crossed the street and was now two blocks from 221 Maple Street. Her gaze fell upon another house and she froze. She’d almost forgotten about the other house.
It wasn’t pretty like 221. No, this house was older, abandoned. Something about it made her sick. It wasn’t like when you eat a corn dog and got on a roller coaster...but like when you saw something that wasn’t right... In your core you just knew it was wrong...bad...sick. She held herself feeling a chill overtake her. For who knows how long she just stared at the house. It was a like black hole sucking her in. It made her sad and devoid of all hope...There was no escaping it...
Someone’s car door shut with a loud bang and it startled her. She quickly began to walk once more, crossing the street to avoid the house. Between the two houses Mandy felt she was losing control. She had to do something. She had to do something...but what?
**********
Crimson in the moonlight...
Cold...pale...skin...
Blue...lips...
So many things reminded him of her... even after all this time. This one had her hair...her beautiful long hair that flowed all around her and glistened in the sunlight. He lifted a strand of it up smelling it, alas even with her shampoo...this one...like all the others...was imperfect...
She lasted longer than the others but in time it became clear as it always did...that she wasn’t his beloved... That no matter how much...she reminded him of her...it wasn’t enough...it would never be enough...He threw her hair down and climbed out of the hole. He grasped his shovel and began to bury her.
After a few seconds he paused, thinking of his beloved. He wished...he’d been able to bury her... Yet he hadn’t been able to let her go. Even with all that had been at risk, he hadn’t wanted it to end. He would have let her rot until she was nothing but bones and even then he would have kept her. Perhaps to this day he would have still had her with him.
Alas, she’d been found and turned to ash, thrown into the wind...never to be seen again. No matter how many times he found someone who reminded her of him...No matter how many times he took them, they were never enough...they were never...her...
**********
The way back home felt like it took longer than ever as Mandy’s mind raced. She realized she needed to face reality. She could no longer handle this...whatever it was on her own. She needed to talk to her parents again. Maybe her mother was right...Maybe she should see someone, a doctor or a councilor. Maybe they could tell her why this was happening and what she could do to stop it.
As she finally reached her street and got to her actual house she wondered what a doctor would think. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. Maybe Mandy wasn’t crazy. Maybe this whole thing wasn’t as strange as she thought. Maybe they’d have some medication she could take or a therapy she could do to fix this. There had to be something a professional could do that she couldn’t. Yet in
the back of her mind she worried, what if they couldn’t help her...What if this just got worse... She tried not to think about it.
It was four by the time Mandy stepped through her front door and she was chilled to the bone. It normally only took her half an hour to get home when she spaced out, but with the snow coming down and a car accident it had taken longer. She knew her parents wouldn’t be home for another hour, so she put away her things and decided to take a hot bath. Hot chocolate and snuggling under her covers wasn’t going to be enough to warm her up.
She took a bath and then made her hot chocolate and tiger toast. When she finished she sat at the kitchen table and waited for her parents to get home. After nearly an hour, she realized that today was their anniversary and that they weren’t going to be home until later. She went upstairs and climbed into bed. She figured she’d stay up and wait for them to get home. She attempted to distract herself while she waited with her book but she just couldn’t focus on it. She turned on her TV and watched a few movies. Warm and drowsy she fell asleep before it was even eight o’clock.
She dreamt she was in her bedroom. Only it wasn’t her bedroom. She was looking at some hand written letters. She couldn’t make out the writing. All she knew was there was a lot of it. There must have been a dozen or so pages in different colors. She sighed shuffling through all of them. Something about them upset her. She didn’t want to think about them. She didn’t want to deal with them. She put them in a shoe box and then went to her closet. She lifted out the bottom of the closet and put the box in a cubbyhole.
Suddenly her window rattled and she jumped frightened. She put the bottom back in her closet and put several or her shoes on top of it. She stood dusting herself off before she went to the window and saw the remnants of a snow ball. She smiled and looked down seeing someone...Someone she knew but their face was blurred. She opened her window and leaned out. She yelled down to them only instead of words coming out, a loud beeping noise sounded over and over again.
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