by Jessie Close
Sandy with Pop Close in the 1980s
Floating the Yellowstone River with family, 1985
Two publicity photos for The Warping of Al, 1990
Mom, Tina, Glenn, and me circa 1995
Bettine Moore Close (Mom) with her dog pack
Rosalynn Carter with me and Snitz (© Leslie Barbaro Photography)
Calen with Jack
Sander with Joey
Mattie with Wing-Ding
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
I have a very long list of people to acknowledge; in fact, everyone in my life has made contributions to my life. But I must say the one who’s been at my elbow throughout the writing of this memoir is Pete Earley, my cowriter, who came up with the idea in the first place and has taught me so much during the process of writing this book. My friends Nan, Bethany, Molly, Liza, Pam, Mike, Suzy, Dick, Leonna, and Kerry were always full of encouragement when I needed it, as were my three children, Calen, Sander, and Mattie, and my other three siblings, Tina, Sandy, and Tambu. A special thanks to Dr. Alexander Vuckovic for his dedication to keeping my demons at bay and to Dr. Deborah Levy who now knows me on a genomic level.
I’m thankful to Grand Central Publishing, and Deb Futter in particular, for believing in my story, to Dianne Choie, Grand Central assistant extraordinaire, and to David Vigliano, my literary agent, who found my story a home.
But the person who has had a huge influence on me my whole life, who has been instrumental in getting me well, and who not only personally stands up in defiance of the stigma of mental illness but also does something about it is Glennie—my sister, my friend, my advocate. Because of her cofounding BringChange2Mind.org, thousands have become aware of the stigma we put on ourselves when we’re mentally ill and have been given the support we need to stand up tall. All together, thanks to Glennie, we have made headway into conquering the stigma and misunderstanding surrounding mental illness.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
JESSIE CLOSE is an internationally recognized speaker, author, poet, and advocate for mental health reform. She lives with bipolar disorder in the foothills of the Tobacco Root Mountains outside Bozeman, Montana, with her Service Dog, Snitz, and three other dogs. She is the author of The Warping of Al (Harper & Row 1990), and she writes a regular blog for BringChange2Mind.org, an antistigma organization that her sister Glenn created at Jessie’s request.
Jessie has received awards from the National Alliance on Mental Illness, the largest grassroots mental health organization in America with more than 600,000 members, and Mental Health America, the largest grassroots group of persons living with mental disorders. Along with her son Calen and sister Glenn, Jessie has also received the Jed Foundation Award, the McLean Award, and Research America’s Isadore Rosenfeld Award for Impact on Public Opinion.
PETE EARLEY has penned thirteen books including four New York Times bestsellers. His book Crazy: A Father’s Search Through America’s Mental Health Madness was one of two finalists for the 2007 Pulitzer Prize in nonfiction. After fourteen years as a journalist, including six years at the Washington Post, Pete became a full-time author with a commitment to exposing stories about social issues. Washingtonian magazine described him as one of a few authors with “the power to introduce new ideas and give them currency” after he spent a full year inside a maximum security prison for his award winning book, The Hot House. When his adult son was diagnosed with a severe mental illness and arrested, Pete recounted his family’s struggle in his book Crazy and became a tireless advocate for mental health reform, traveling to forty-eight states and multiple countries to deliver speeches about our troubled mental health system. A lifetime member of the National Alliance on Mental Illness, his book received every major writing award given by mental health advocacy groups. In addition to contributing articles to national publications, he writes an often-quoted blog about mental health.
Also by Jessie Close
The Warping of Al
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CONTENTS
Cover
Title Page
Welcome
Dedication
Epigraph
Author’s Note
Prologue
Part One: Not Your Normal Childhood Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Vignette Number One by Glenn Close
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Vignette Number Two by Glenn Close
Chapter Eight
Part Two: Husbands and Others Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Vignette Number Three by Glenn Close
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Part Three: Montana April, A Fetal-Position Month Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Part Four: The Monster Within Me Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter Twenty-Six
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Part Five: Finding Myself Chapter Twenty-Nine
Chapter Thirty
Chapter Thirty-One
Chapter Thirty-Two
Chapter Thirty-Three
Chapter Thirty-Four
Chapter Thirty-Five
Chapter Thirty-Six
Epilogue by Glenn Close
Photos
Acknowledgments
About the Author
Also by Jessie Close
Newsletters
Copyright
Copyright
Some of the individuals in the book have asked me to respect their anonymity due to the sensitive nature of the topics discussed. Therefore, I have modified their identities and certain details about them.
Copyright © 2015 by Jessie Close
Vignettes and Epilogue copyright © 2015 by Glenn Close
All photos (except the one of Jessie Close and Rosalynn Carter) are courtesy of the Close family archives.
Photo of Jessie Close and Rosalyn Carter reprinted with permission. Copyright © Leslie Barbaro Photography.
Cover design by Elizabeth Connor
Cover photograph © Timothy White
Cover copyright © 2015 by Hachette Book Group, Inc.
All rights reserved. In accordance with the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976, the scanning, uploading, and electronic sharing of any part of this book without the permission of the publisher constitute unlawful piracy and theft of the author’s intellectual property. If you would like to use material from the book (other than for review purposes), prior written permission must be obtained by contacting the publisher at [email protected]. Thank you for your support of the author’s rights.
Grand Central Publishing
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First ebook edition: January 2015
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ISBN 978-1-4555-4881-1
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