by Keeland, Vi
“I won’t.” I couldn’t say the words with enough conviction to believe them myself, so I knew Harper wouldn’t buy it.
“I have to go, but I’m calling you later so we can talk about this more.”
I smiled half-heartedly. “Okay.”
“Let me know what lover boy says about the shoot.”
I laughed. “I will. And thanks for everything, Harp.”
***
“Why don’t I go pick up Alex from camp so you can keep doing what you’re doing? I’d say I’d take over, but my idea of decorating is a few footballs and some signed jerseys pinned to the wall.”
I smiled. Not only had Levi agreed to be in the photo shoot, he’d also spent the entire afternoon helping me stage bookcases and mantels so they’d look good for the photos. We painted Mason jars and filled them with fresh flowers, went to the used bookstore and bought color-coordinated books to display on shelves, and now I was busy trying to fill in the nooks and crannies with the best pieces from all over the inn.
I set a pale blue vase on top of the mantel, then shook my head and took it down. “Thanks. That would be great. This is going to take me a while.”
“No problem.”
“Do you mind if I move things around in your room after I finish up here?”
He shook his head. “Have at it. Leave anything heavy that needs to be moved for when I get back.”
“Okay.”
The plan was to do the photo shoot first thing tomorrow morning. Harper and I had gone back and forth over text and decided the best areas to focus on were the living room, the outside front of the inn, and my bedroom and Levi’s. So after I figured out what would go where in the living room, I took some leftover shelf décor to Levi’s bedroom to see what I could do about dressing it up. A Broncos duffle bag sat on the dresser, so I grabbed it and went to zip it closed, figuring I’d hide it in the closet for now. But as I rounded the zipper at the corner, a box stuck out. I attempted to tuck it neatly inside, only to realize it was a giant box of condoms. Not only that, underneath the mega box was a second box the same size. Both unopened.
My heart sank. One of these boxes would have lasted me the past five years. Actually, that was being generous. I could’ve probably stretched the box to last the final year Tanner and I were together and the years that followed. It was a stark reminder of just how different my lifestyle and Levi’s really were. He probably blew through these in a month while on the road. That made me feel a little queasy, yet I just stood there, staring down at the box.
I was so lost in my head that I didn’t hear Levi until he was in the doorway.
“Hey. Alex wanted to eat over at his friend Kyle’s. I texted you, but you didn’t answer, so I made an executive decision and dropped him off.”
I turned with the box of condoms still in my hands. “Exactly how long does this supply last you? Just preseason, or a few weeks in?”
Levi’s eyes dropped to my hands, and his brows dipped. “You think I’m stocking up for when I get back on the road?”
I shook my head. “It’s none of my business. I really don’t want to know what you do on the road.” Suddenly feeling awkward, I shoved the box back in the duffle bag. It still didn’t fit. “I wasn’t snooping. I tried to zip the bag to put it in the closet, and they were sticking out.”
Levi walked over. I’d been avoiding looking at him, but I felt his eyes on me.
“What?” I finally said.
He gently took the box from my hands and tossed it on the bed. “I bought them today. I wasn’t stocking up for when it’s time to go back to work. I figured I should hide them since Alex already found a belt and asked questions.”
I shrugged. “Whatever. It’s none of my business.”
His eyes narrowed. “What do you mean, it’s none of your business?”
“When you bought them and what you plan to do with them is your business, not mine.”
Levi held my eyes as he reached into his back pocket. Taking out his wallet, he shuffled through until he found whatever he was looking for. He unfolded a small paper and held it up for me to see. “CVS receipt from today. The date is marked at the top. Is that the only thing you saw? Just the condoms?”
“Yes.”
He dug into the bag and held up a small bottle. “I think this will tell you exactly what my plans were when I made the purchases today.”
I glanced at the bottle and back to him. “Lube?”
“Look closer.”
I squinted. Peach flavored.
“I thought it would be funny,” he said. “But then again, I didn’t think I’d be showing it to you while you were accusing me of buying them to get ready to fuck other women.”
The anger in his voice pulled my eyes to meet his. “I didn’t. I mean…I don’t… I wasn’t sure if…” I shook my head. “We should probably stop anyway.”
“Do you want to stop?”
“It’s the right thing to do.”
“Wasn’t asking about right or wrong. Was asking if you wanted to stop. Because I’m pretty sure the size of the two boxes I picked up today tells you that stopping is the furthest thing from my mind.”
“But…we’re in business together.”
He took a step closer. “Don’t care.”
“You’re leaving pretty soon.”
He took another step. “I’m right here, right now.”
“Alex…”
His eyes dropped to my lips as he took another step. “…isn’t home.”
My entire body started to tingle. “This town is so small. Someone will figure it out.”
Levi licked his lips as he stared at my breasts. “They can watch, for all I care.”
He took another step until we were toe to toe. Arching a brow, he asked, “You done telling me all the reasons us having sex is so wrong?”
I wanted to say no and continue to recite all the reasons we should keep our distance. But he smelled so damn good, and my body felt a magnetic pull to his.
My breathing grew labored, and I groaned. “One more time. I mean it. This is it.”
The wickedest grin spread across his face. “Right…” He wrapped a hand around my neck and squeezed as he pulled me close. “Now shut up and kiss me, and let me show you all the reasons it’s right.”
CHAPTER 16
* * *
Presley
A week later, my warnings had become a running joke. Levi came into the kitchen while I was waiting on the coffee pot to finish brewing. I frowned to see him shirtless—not because the view was disappointing. Just the opposite, really. But I already felt my stance on not having sex again weakening.
“Did you wake up late?” he said.
I nodded. “I also forgot to set up the coffee last night before I went to bed, so I had to drop Alex at camp before getting any caffeine in me.”
“So Alex is already out of the house?” Levi’s voice deepened. He didn’t have to say anything else for me to know where his mind was.
I held up a finger in warning. “No. Yesterday was the last time.”
He grinned and moved closer. “Was it?”
“I’m not kidding, Levi.” I poked my nail into his chest. “Keep six feet away at all times.”
He caught my finger and lifted it to his mouth. Sucking on it, he nodded.
My voice shrank and had zero conviction. “I mean it. No more sex, Levi.”
He pulled my finger from his mouth, but nipped at it before releasing it. “Fine. No more sex.”
The next thing I knew, my feet were off the ground, and Levi had me up and over his shoulder.
“Levi, what did we just agree to?” I protested.
He swatted my ass as he marched toward his bedroom. “No sex. But we didn’t say anything about blow jobs.”
“Levi…” I laughed and flailed around. But when he set me down in his bedroom and locked the door, the look on his face was anything but playful.
He pointed to the floor. “On your knees.”
He stroked it up and down. “On your knees, sweetheart.”
Considering my mouth was salivating already, I knew it was a lost cause. So I lowered myself. “Fine. But last time...”
He dug his hands into my hair and smiled. “Right.”
***
An hour later, we’d both gone down on each other and had sex. I stood beside the bed getting dressed as Levi watched me.
“I’m crazy about you…” he said quietly.
“You’re crazy about sex. Have you ever had your hormones checked? Maybe that’s why you’re such a good athlete.”
“I’m serious, Presley.”
My heart squeezed. “We shouldn’t be having this conversation.”
“Why not?”
“You know why not.”
“You want to know what I was thinking about while you were getting dressed?”
I buttoned my shorts closed. “Nope.”
“I was imagining you pregnant with a big belly. I bet you’d look fucking amazing.”
My mouth hung open. That might’ve been the sweetest thing a man had ever said to me. But I had no idea how to respond. So I decided not to. “I have to go to the lighting store to pick up the fixtures I ordered. The electrician is coming to install them tomorrow.”
“I also want to fuck you in my old bedroom at my mom’s house.”
My nose wrinkled. “Really?”
“I was thinking last night that there are two types of women—ones you bring home to your mom, and ones you want to fuck. But you, I want to take you to my mom’s for dinner and then sneak you into my old bedroom and fuck you while she loads the dishwasher.”
I frowned. “I have to run up to camp. I rushed out of the house so fast this morning that I forgot to give Alex lunch.”
Levi was quiet as I picked up my phone and looked around for anything else I might’ve forgotten. But when I got to the door, he stopped me.
“Tomorrow afternoon, I have to go to the high school. It’s their first day of tryouts for next season’s team. The coach asked me to stop by and say a few words and sign autographs after.”
“Oh, that’s nice.”
“Yeah, well…it was supposed to be nice. But I made the mistake of mentioning it to my agent when we were on the phone last night, and now he wants to turn it into a PR stunt. He asked me if he could arrange a photographer to come by and take some pics. I told him I might have someone who could do it. If you’re not busy, they’ll pay you to take some photographs.”
“I’d be happy to take some photos. They don’t even have to pay me. Lord knows I owe you a thousand favors.”
Levi smiled and looked down at my knees. One of them was pretty red. “I think you paid them all back an hour ago, and then some. Sorry about the rug burn on that knee, by the way. I guess I got a little carried away.”
I chuckled. “What time tomorrow?”
“Three. Maybe we can bring Alex? He’ll probably be playing on that field someday.”
“I’m sure he’d love that. Thanks.” I smiled and put my hand on the doorknob. “I’ll see you later.”
“Hang on. Can I ask you something?”
“What?”
“The only time you ever kiss me is when we’re in bed. Doesn’t it feel weird to leave this room right now without kissing me goodbye?”
It absolutely did. And each time I left him it got harder and felt less natural to just walk out the door. But I forced myself to do it because it also felt like something I needed to do to protect my heart. Though explaining that to Levi would be admitting I had feelings for him out loud, which would only make things worse. So instead, I ignored his question and waved. “I’ll see you around.”
***
Later that afternoon at football camp, the boys were taking a water break when Coach Jeremy broke away from the pack to come talk to me.
I’d been sort of keeping a low profile, standing under a shady tree when he approached. I’d ended up canceling our last date, so I’d been avoiding initiating conversation with him.
“Hey, Presley. Long time no speak.”
Clearing my throat, I said, “Yeah. How have you been, Jeremy?”
He cocked his head to the side. “I’m good. I’ve been thinking about you lately. Wondering if maybe we could grab a bite to eat again sometime. It’s been a while since we caught up.”
I’d thought maybe Jeremy would take the hint that I wasn’t interested after I bowed out of going to the music festival with him. But was I really not interested indefinitely, or was I so intoxicated by Levi that nothing else mattered at the moment?
“Things are a bit hectic over at The Palm Inn currently. I think for now, it’s best if I don’t take you up on your offer.”
He looked back toward the kids. “I’m getting a little too old for beating around the bush, you know? And I really like you. If you’re not interested in going out with me ever again, I’d prefer you just tell me so I don’t make a fool of myself and keep asking. I promise there won’t be any hard feelings.”
I decided to be as honest as I could right now. “I think you’re a great guy, and I did have a really nice time with you. But I have something…personal going on that I’d rather not discuss. And it means I’m unavailable to go out with you for the time being.”
“I had a really good time with you, too,” he said, crestfallen as he nodded. “Fair enough, though. No pressure. Just know that the offer is always open.” He looked past the tree I’d been leaning against and spoke to someone. “Oh, didn’t see you there.”
I turned around.
Levi.
He held two coffees. My stomach sank. Levi was supposed to have been at the house overseeing the work being done while I was at practice. It must have finished up early.
The tension in the air was thick as Jeremy said, “Anyway, I’d better get back to the boys. See ya around, Presley.” He nodded toward Levi and took off.
Levi’s cold stare made me uneasy as he silently handed me one of the coffees. He opened his and blew on it, then took a sip, continuing to say nothing.
“How long were you standing behind the tree?” I asked.
“Long enough to hear you promise Coach a date in the near future.”
Shit. “That wasn’t what I said.”
“Oh, you’re right. I believe it was that you have something personal going on, and you couldn’t go out with him for the time being.” He fiddled with the lid to his coffee. “This something personal guy—does he have a name? Let me guess, is it the chump who actually cares about you, but you only seem to view as a fuckboy?”
“Levi…”
“You’re keeping your options open. I get it.” He looked out toward the field. “Anyway, I figured I’d surprise you. Looks like I was the one in for a surprise.”
“I’m not interested in Jeremy,” I insisted.
“Not interested right now. Yeah, I got that much. But you might be after I’m long gone. Implying that things might change in the future said it all. Let me translate what you meant. ‘When Levi leaves and I no longer have him around to fuck me, I might be interested in fucking you, Jeremy.’”
I deserved every bit of his wrath. If the roles were reversed, and I’d overheard him talking to a woman, I would’ve been just as pissed. But this was my opportunity to set things straight.
“I’m just trying to be realistic, Levi. Pretty soon, you’ll leave town and go back to the life you came from. Playing house with me…it’s just a phase for you.”
Anger filled his eyes. “What have I ever done to give you that impression? Don’t use my past or even Tanner against me in your answer either. This is about you and me, Presley. Us. When have I ever given you the impression that I wasn’t serious about you?”
I couldn’t answer his question. And that terrified me. It made me wonder if my own fear had distorted everything. He’d been n
othing but caring, attentive, and dare I say, loving with me. But fear was a bitch, and I couldn’t seem to come to terms with all of the obstacles we’d have to get through to actually be together. It wasn’t a realistic possibility, as far as I was concerned.
“You scare me, Levi, for so many reasons.”
“So you’re stopping yourself from getting close to me. Same reason you’ll let me fuck you in the ass but won’t even kiss me outside of the bedroom…”
I winced.
“Shit.” He closed his eyes. “I’m sorry. That was uncalled for. I’m just frustrated. This is not the time nor place for this conversation.” He turned away.
When I followed and put my hand on his arm, he whipped around. “What is this really about, Presley? Is it just about Tanner, or do you really not trust me?”
I stayed silent, not wanting to admit that I did worry about his ability to be a one-woman man, even if he’d done nothing specific to warrant my insecurity. I knew old habits died hard, and I couldn’t accept that he’d changed.
He took my silence as an affirmative. “Well, then, I’m fighting a losing battle. If you can’t trust me, that’s worse than worrying about how Tanner would react. Without trust, we have nothing left to say to each other.” He dumped the rest of his coffee on the grass and crushed the cup in his hand. “And by the way, I’m just as fucking scared as you about all this. But I’m not gonna pretend what we have is nothing to try to neutralize it.”
He stopped talking suddenly when we saw Alex running toward us.
“Uncle Levi! I didn’t know you were coming today,” Alex said when he got close.
“Hey, buddy. Figured I’d try to make the end.”
“Why were you yelling at Mom?”
Levi blinked. “Did it look like I was yelling?”
“Yeah. It seemed like you guys were arguing about something.”
“No. I was just complaining about my day.” He lifted the crushed cup. “And this coffee stunk. Put me in a bad mood. Tasted like mud.”
“Oh. I thought you guys were fighting again, like you used to when you first moved in.”